Get Closer by Alyssa Turner

Chapter 5

Martell

I had knocked on the door and waited for Russel to answer. Then I’d frowned after several minutes when there was none. Had he left for lunch without me? Maybe with Chloe? I hadn’t been able to find her either. Just in case, I’d knocked again and then flinched when a muffled moan seeped through the door. I’d stared at the wooden barrier between us. Just what the hell was going on in there? Maybe he was sick from some bad yogurt.

I opened the door, cracking it slightly, seeing only the corner of his desk and nothing else. Papers streamed down from the surface. Pushing the door fully open, I stepped inside. It took a moment to make sense of what was happening.

Chloe. And Russel.

Chloe and Russel…together?

Chloe’s head had been tossed back with abandon as she released another moan, her legs spread far apart with her skirt hitched up to her hips. Russel’s face was smothered in her breasts, sucking a nipple, teasing it with his teeth while one hand undoubtedly stroked her pussy.

I hardened watching them, and more than that, I wished the hand between her legs was my hand, and his teeth were teasing me with little nibbles. I was watching the highlight reel of my secret fantasy. If only I could touch her…could feel him. I stood there, waiting for them to glance up and notice me, but they just kept going at it. And I couldn’t stop the fuming anger building inside with each passing minute. It was almost as if I was invisible.

Clenching my jaw, I started to leave. I meant to turn around and walk right out of there, but my feet remained glued in place. I closed my eyes, urging myself to go. I didn’t need to hang around for this, wishing that either of them felt something for me. I shouldn’t have been there, anyway. I almost turned to go, but a dark part of me wanted them to know. I wanted them to know I was here, watching them.

Without another thought, I kicked the door shut with more strength than I should have, flinching when the slam was especially loud.

A deep sense of satisfaction washed over me when they jumped, and I met Chloe’s gaze. She stared back at me with an odd look of apology mixed with horror, before quickly pushing Russel away and covering herself. That look was a brick wall between them and me. I wasn’t supposed to be here. I wasn’t allowed to be a part of what they had together.

Well of course, but I didn’t understand why that hurt so much.

Then guilt flooded in and I was truly sorry about how mortified she looked as she scrambled to pull herself back together. Russel looked guilty too, only he was most certainly staring at me.

“Martell,” he said.

I scowled, watching Russel stand and put his hand on Chloe’s lower back. I hated how he touched her. I hated how she relaxed when he did. I definitely hated how good they looked together. “Sorry, did you knock?”

“Yeah,” I sneered, crossing my arms. “Not that you heard.”

“Do you need anything?”

My fists clenched as I glanced back and forth between them. Chloe seemed to shrink under my gaze. She opened her mouth, and I couldn’t help the raise of my eyebrow, daring her to come up with some valid excuse as to why Russel was looking for her report in her cleavage.

Chloe swallowed, looking sincerely apologetic as she gazed back at me. “I…I’m sorry…I’m going to go,” Chloe whispered in a hurried breath and ducked her head. She grabbed her bag, shoveling the papers inside hurriedly and nearly running out of the door. Russel watched her go, his mouth open as if he would call her to come back any moment.

I didn’t have a claim on either one of them, but it was hard to stuff my stupid hurt feelings into a bag and just suck it up. I kind of hated them both at that moment, and I didn’t care if it made sense or not. The door clicked shut and I watched Russel gaze at it, wondering if he would leave me to run after her.

“So,” I started, strolling over to Russel’s desk to lean against it. “Are you and Chloe a thing now?” I couldn’t stop the bite in my voice even if I wanted to, and I wasn’t sure I did.

Russel sighed, running his hands over his face while throwing himself into his chair. He shook his head, not even bothering to look me in the eye.

That kind of non-answer wasn’t going to cut it. I folded my arms. “Well?”

“I don’t know.”

“What do you mean you don’t know?” I asked, speaking in a louder voice than was probably reasonable.

Russel’s eyes narrowed up at me. I flinched, wondering what he saw. “What’s it to you?”

I whirled around and strode towards the door. I wasn’t ready to answer that question, and two could play the non-answer game. I didn’t know what any of this hurt roiling inside me meant either. Who did I want more? Chloe or Russel? What a clusterfuck.

He didn’t let it rest. “Why do you care what I do with Chloe?”

“I don’t,” I said throwing open the door and slamming it shut behind me.

I threw open the door to my own office and it bounced off the door stop and slammed shut on its own. Closing my eyes, I inhaled deeply and counted to ten, trying to calm myself. It’s fine. Everything’s fine. It’s not like Chloe and I were a thing. It’s not like Russel and I could ever be a thing. I felt the tension in my shoulders subside enough to settle myself into my chair. Just relax.

There was a soft knock at my door and I opened my eyes. “Come in,” I said with a tone so sweet it almost fooled me too.

My assistant, who entered with a steamy cup of coffee handed it over with a stack of papers. “You have a meeting in an hour,” she said, barely lifting her eyes. “Don’t forget.”

I sighed. “Yeah, sure. I’ll be there,” I said, watching her leave. Nothing beats acting like a raging hot mess to get the rumor mill spinning. One more deep breath and I was able to turn on my computer and get back to work.

I spent the rest of the day focusing on my to-do list and attending two different team meetings. Thankfully, I was able to keep myself as busy as possible until finally, the workday ended and I found myself sitting in my car, both hands on the steering wheel. I willed myself to turn the ignition and go, but I couldn’t go back to the place I temporarily called home. I didn’t want to see Russel’s face, knowing it would only trigger that memory of him buried in Chloe’s breasts with her head tossed back in ecstasy.

My cock twitched and I quickly turned the ignition and drove myself to the gym. I tore off my clothes and changed into that morning’s workout gear.I didn’t need another workout, but I needed to burn away that image. Of them. Together. And I didn’t want to have another annoying discussion with Russel about why I was so angry.

Talking about my feelings was never something I was all that good at, especially when it came to Russel. I grimaced as I remembered his hand up her skirt and grabbed a heavier weight for my bicep curls. Then I returned the dumbbells and went for the pull-up bar. I jumped up and grabbed the metal above me, doing several chin-ups in a row as I pictured her on top of him. His lips on her breasts, his hands spreading her ass wide…her moans of pleasure.

I increased my pace, feeling the burn in my arms and ignoring the pain in my shoulders. Her moans echoed in my ears and I imagined those moans replaced with mine as Russel sucked at my neck and Chloe’s lips enveloped my cock.

I dropped from the bar and rushed to the bathroom, splashing water on my face. I did not need to have that thought in my head. Stop entertaining thoughts that will never happen.

Working out didn’t seem to have the distracting effect I was hoping for. I changed, moving quickly until I was back in my car, staring at the steering wheel, once again urging myself to go home. It was getting late and I had an early morning—even earlier if I didn’t want to run into Russel. But my thoughts kept returning to both of them.

Her on his desk.

Him between her legs.

Me standing there like a statue in the middle of Russel’s office.

My cock twitched as I re-imagined Russel looking up, hazel eyes meeting mine and widening for a moment in shock, before his lips twisted into a wicked grin. That was a little detail I was still wrapping my head around. My breath hitched and I pressed my hand into my hardening cock.

If things had been different between us, would he have crooked his finger at me? Would Chloe have turned in my direction and smiled with an unsaid invitation? I imagined her lying down on the desk with her body completely sprawled out and her mouth falling open.

I whimpered, imagining Chloe licking her lips, her hands reaching towards me over her head as she whispered, “Join us.”

I unzipped my pants, my hard cock springing from the fabric and already glistening with pre-cum. I stroked myself as I imagined Russel standing and unzipping his pants.

“Yeah, Martell,” said the Russel in my daydream, “Join us.”

And I would stride over there, like I was meant to do it. I would take Russel’s jaw and kiss him deeply while Chloe unbuttoned my pants and took my cock deep into her mouth. I gasped, grabbing for the tissues in my glove compartment as I came unexpectedly, my moans caught like stowaways in my throat. I leaned back against my car seat, banging my head lightly on the cushion behind me.

Why was I torturing myself?

When I returned home, Russel was in the kitchen, sitting on one of the counter stools with his laptop instead of reclining on the couch in his usual spot. He’d put himself right where I wouldn’t be able to avoid him. I couldn’t help but wonder about this whole live-in situation. He was acting like my worried partner, waiting for me to return after a terrible fight. How surreal.

Russel straightened, slipping off his seat and walking towards me with his hands in his pockets. “You’re home late,” he said calmly, as if he were commenting on the weather.

“Went to the gym.”

I headed for my room. I didn’t want to be around him a second longer, worried that I would do or say something stupid if I lingered.

Russel called after me. “What’s going on, Martell?”

I clenched my jaw as the bastard followed me into my room.

“Did you and Chloe—” Russel paused and I turned, watching him lift one shoulder awkwardly in a half shrug. “Did you have feelings for Chloe? Did I intrude on anything?” Russel’s gaze was focused on the window. He couldn’t even look at me, which made this worse.

“Yeah,” I barked at him, tossing my gym bag down at the foot of the bed. “We had a few sparks, but clearly nothing like the hook-up-at-first-sight you had going on.”

Russel rubbed the back of his head and leaned against the doorframe. “We met a few years ago.” He grimaced, sighing and looking away. “It…didn’t work out between us.”

“And now?” I crossed my arms, watching him shift his weight back and forth.

“Now…” Those mournful hazel eyes met mine, and I nearly let go of all my anger and frustration. Nearly. “We might restart things.”

I laughed bitterly. “I thought you said workplace hookups aren’t a good idea.”

“They aren’t.”

“Well, good to know you’re a hypocrite.” I inhaled deeply, my shoulders shaking. I looked around at my room, taking a moment to figure out what I really wanted, before settling my attention on my suitcase. I grabbed it, throwing it on my bed.

“What are you doing?” Russel strode towards me, grabbing my hand, stopping me from opening my drawer. His voice splintered, but I couldn’t look at him now.

“I’m leaving,” I said shakily. “I can’t stay here.”

“Why not?”

I can’t stay here knowing we can never be. The thought took me by surprise. There was a time when I didn’t think of Russel that way, a time when I’d gotten used to sharing girls, and kicking it at clubs all night. I trained myself to never care about what he did, or who he was with. We were just friends; I was happy with that.

Until now.

“I just can’t,” I said, shrugging him off and throwing open a dresser drawer. I grabbed my clothes by handfuls and tossed them into my suitcase without bothering to fold them.

“Martell, you don’t have to go.” He sounded so broken. “Why are you acting like this? It’s not like I did anything wrong.”

I scoffed, but refused to say anything that would embarrass myself any further. I knew I was acting like a child over this whole mess, but I didn’t care, or I didn’t want to.

Russel shook his head, looking completely perplexed. “You’re actually moving out because of Chloe?”

“It’s not just Chloe!” I shouted. “It’s…It’s—” I ate up the distance between us in three long strides, until we were only centimeters away. His lips were so close. All I had to do was lean in and…show him.

Russel’s breath hitched, bringing me back down to Earth and I sighed, my shoulders slumping.

“Martell, come on. Stay. Your house is nearly done with renovations. A hotel will be expensive.”

I nodded. He was right. It would be stupid to leave now, especially since that money pit was draining me dry, and I didn’t have anyone else in all of New York who would put me up. Sighing, I headed back over to the bed. “Fine,” I said, while I stared down at my suitcase and the piles of crumpled clothes inside it. “I’ll stay. Just…” I glanced back at him, and found him watching me closely. “Just leave me alone.”

Russel gulped, and then he nodded solemnly before finally walking away.