Accidental Mail Order Bride by J. S. Cooper

Chapter Two

I pulledup to a bar in the middle of nowhere.

I’d grown up watching those horror movies set in some podunk town with a bunch of locals who wanted to do something to you. I didn’t want to be the Montana chainsaw king’s next victim. I knew I looked cute. If there were some psycho sitting at the bar who wanted to do something to a hottie like me, I would definitely be targeted. I was from out of town and very obviously out of place.

But I was street smart, at least. My mom had prepared me well. Living in New York City, she’d always told me to carry a knife in my purse, and I hadn’t taken it out of my handbag when I’d flown here. I’d been a little bit shocked that I’d gotten through TSA with it, but I wasn’t about to question the fact that the X-ray hadn’t picked it up. Maybe they knew that I was going to need a knife with me once I hit Billings.

If push came to shove and someone tried to bother me, I’d knife them. I mean, I’d never had to knife anyone before, but I was pretty confident that I could do it.

Though as I looked around, it didn’t really look like there was much going on here.

I pulled into the parking lot next to a bunch of Ford pickup trucks, turned off the ignition, and got out of the car. I looked around, taking in the mountain range in the distance. I had to admit it was beautiful. I sucked in a couple of gulps of fresh air. My lungs had never felt happier. I looked down at my heels and wished that I had put on something a little bit more sensible, but I always had to be me, even if “me” was a little too ostentatious for a place like Montana.

I walked towards the bar door and looked up at the sign. 12 Point Buck Bar, it read. I had no idea what that meant. I walked in and immediately I could feel eyes upon me. There weren’t many people in the bar, and I felt extremely self-conscious.

I looked around to see if there were any women and was happy when I saw a few. Two girls in a booth chatting to themselves, and another girl with a biker dude at the back of the bar. At least I wasn’t the open woman there. I headed towards the bartender so that I could order a drink. I moved as if I were a model on the catwalk. Out of the corner of my eye, I could see two guys in a corner booth gaping at me. I couldn’t tell if they were impressed or shocked.

“Hey, there,” the bartender said, a wide smile on his face. I was glad to see that he was friendly. The last thing I needed was a grumpy bartender.

“Hi. Can I order a drink, please?”

“Sure. What you be having, miss?”

“What’s your specialty?”

“Well, we got lots of beer. You like beer?”

“I’m more of a cocktail girl.”

“We don’t really make many cocktails around here, but I could whip you up something.” He looked behind him. “We might have some coconut shavings and pineapple juice and stuff.”

“Um, maybe a rum and Coke, please?” I didn’t know if it was smart to have a rum and a Coke now that I was driving, but one drink wasn’t going to hurt me.

“Sure, coming right up. So, you new to these parts?” He grabbed a frosted glass from the bar top. I wondered if he was only used to serving beers, but I didn’t want to be rude.

“Yeah. You could kind of say that … very new.”

“Where do you live?” he asked. “I didn’t hear about anyone new moving in around here.”

“Actually, funny you asked that question. I kind of need your help.”

“You need my help finding somewhere to live?”

“Well, no, not somewhere to live, but I’m trying to find the place I’m going to be living.”

“You’re trying to find the place you’re going to be living?” He raised an eyebrow. “Interesting. You got people around here?”

“No, I don’t have any people around here. Well, I mean, kind of. Maybe … my in-laws.” I almost groaned as I said that word. It felt like a joke.

“Maybe your in-laws?” He stopped then and just stared at me, looking confused. “What does that mean? Hey, Austin, you hear this girl? She thinks that maybe her in-laws live here.” He started laughing. “Who are your in-laws, honey?

I wished I could take back the words. I looked to my right and saw a man sitting there, staring at me. I hadn’t noticed him before. He was tall with dark hair and laughing green eyes, but his expression was serious. From the look of it, he’d been listening to my entire conversation. Just great.

“Well, not in-laws.” I looked at the bartender and then at the handsome man next to me. I gave him a nervous smile but he didn’t smile back. “I mean, possible in-laws.”

“You know what that means, Austin? Because I sure don’t,” the bartender said. Austin just looked me up and down.

“I’ve got no idea, Chip,” he responded, chugging his beer. Then he looked at me. “Care to let us in on what you mean by that?”

“Well, I am kind of here to get married.” I tried not to wince. I didn’t really want to tell them everything because it was extremely embarrassing and I didn’t know them. But on the other hand, maybe if they kind of knew they could help me out in some way. Like if they knew the family and the family sucked then they could warn me.

He placed a frosty glass in front of me. “Here’s your drink, ma’am.”

“Thank you. How much would that be?”

“Five bucks.”

“Really?” I looked surprised as I opened my wallet. “Just five?”

“Where are you from? Five is quite a lot, isn’t it?”

“I’m from New York City. I live in Brooklyn, or I guess I lived in Brooklyn. You can’t get a rum and coke for $5. Maybe $15, if you’re lucky. And that’s at the …” I let my voice trail off as I realized the two guys were staring at me. “Well, anyway, good deal.”

“Put your money away.” Austin pulled out his wallet. “I got it.”

“Oh no, you can’t buy my drink.” I shook my head. “You don’t even know me.”

“Well, I’m getting to know you.” He put a twenty-dollar bill on the bar and gave me a wry smile. “So, are you going to tell us more about your in-laws?”

I tried not to stare at him too hard, but he was by far one of the best-looking men I’d ever seen in my life. He had that rugged look that made you think of a real man. I was so used to metrosexual men in New York that I’d almost forgotten how alpha some men could be.

“Well, it’s kind of embarrassing. I haven’t actually met them yet.” I grabbed my glass and ran my finger along the rim nervously before taking a sip.

“Oh, so you’ve come to meet your boyfriend’s parents? Is that it?” The bartender said as he handed me a small bowl of nuts.

“You could say that.”

“So, your boyfriend, he lives in New York, but he’s from Montana. Is that it?”

“Well, no … He’s from Montana and he’s always lived in Montana.”

“Then how’d you meet him?” Austin leaned towards me.

I paused. I really didn’t want to tell them that I hadn’t met him yet. “Well, you know, online …” I smiled and fluffed my hair. “But it’s a long story. I’m kind of looking for his parents’ ranch, though. Maybe you guys could help me out?

“Your boyfriend couldn’t come and pick you up?” Austin said, raising an eyebrow. “What sort of man is that?”

“He was busy working on the ranch today.” I dropped my gaze from his bright green eyes to his juicy lips to his chest, trying to ignore the stirring in my belly as I studied his muscles.

“Okay,” Austin shrugged. “Huh.”

“I mean, it’s not bad. He really loves me and everything, but …” I paused. I didn’t know why I was lying. “He was busy, and I told him it was okay, but I kind of lost the address, so maybe you guys could help me out?”

“You lost the address to your boyfriend’s ranch?” Austin looked incredulous. “Why don’t you call him and ask him for the address again?”

“Well, I kind of lost his number because …” I knew I sounded like a hot mess. “He recently changed his phone and I didn’t update the number in my phone, and I actually broke my phone and I had to get a new one, and I lost all the numbers.” I knew I was talking way too much and that it was probably very clear I was lying. “You know how it goes.”

“Sounds like you’ve got a bit of a problem there, miss,” the bartender said. “What was your name?”

“Lucy.” I gave him a bright smile. “So if you could tell me where Horseshoe Ranch is, I’d be much obliged.”

“Horseshoe Ranch?” The bartender started laughing. “Really?” He looked over Austin. “You hear that, Austin? She’s going to meet her in-laws at Horseshoe Ranch. What did you say the name of your boyfriend was again, ma’am?”

“Yes,” Austin said quietly, “what’s the name of your boyfriend that lives at Horseshoe Ranch?”

“Oh, do you guys know where it is? Thank God. I was scared that I wasn’t going to be able to get there, and well, my boyfriend would be very nervous and worried. He would most likely call the police, and maybe the FBI would get involved. I’d be all over the news, and I’d look like such a fool, you know?”

“Uh-huh,” Austin said with a smirk. “And your boyfriend’s name is?”

“Well, funny story,” I said, not wanting to admit that I had no idea of the name of the man I was going to marry.

His parents hadn’t wanted to tell me, and I wasn’t sure why. They said everything would be explained once I arrived, and I mean, yes, it had been weird, but it wasn’t any weirder than moving to another state to marry a man you’d never met. I’d needed a way out of my life in New York and … Shit, I’d watched so many movies and read so many books where women had made big moves and found love that I figured what could go wrong? I mean, if I didn’t like him and if he didn’t like me, I would just go back to Manhattan. The parents seemed nice in the emails.

I chewed on my lower lip. If it had been the parents I’d been speaking to … I prayed to God I wasn’t walking into some sort of situation that would have me on a show like Criminal Minds or Law and Order SVU. What if I hadn’t even been speaking to his parents?

“So, his name?” Austin said, jarring me out of my thoughts.

“Well, Austin, don’t you know them people there down at Horseshoe Ranch well?” The bartender interrupted.

I looked at Austin in surprise. Shit, I hoped he didn’t know them very well.

“I know them very well.” His green eyes were pinned to me. “I’m curious. I haven’t heard about you. What was your name again?”

“Lucy,” I squeaked. Shit. I didn’t want him to know the family that lived there. I just wanted him to know of the ranch, casually. If he knew the people that lived there, maybe even possibly was friends with them, this just made me look even worse.

“So, Lucy, you have a boyfriend that lives there?”

“Well, I mean, more like my fiancé.”

“You have a fiancé? Interesting. Interesting, indeed.”

“Well, you know,” I laughed self-consciously, “if you could just give me the address, then I’ll be on my way. I don’t want my fiancé to get worried about me.”

“Okay, then. Sure, I can give you the address,” he nodded. “You tell Amelia and Ranger that Austin said hello.”

“Who?” I said blinking. Then I remembered. “Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. The in-laws.” I looked down at my drink. Shit, I sucked at this. “I am old-fashioned, so I call them Mr. and Mrs. Hamilton.”

“You do know Amelia and Ranger, right? Seeing as you’re engaged to their son.”

“Oh yes. I know them very well. They love me. They said I’m like the daughter they’ve never had.” Which was true in a way. They said they’d never had a daughter and they really wanted a daughter-in-law and grandkids. I mean, they didn’t say that I was like the daughter-in-law they’d ever had, but they did want one, that I knew. “But only through phone calls and stuff.”

“Huh, okay.” Austin’s eyes narrowed. “So how often do you communicate with them?”

“Almost daily.”

“Really? Interesting.”

“Well, I don’t know why you find it so interesting. Do you know them or something?”

“Yeah. I know them,” he nodded. He finished his beer and then stood up. “Well, I’ve got to be going. Good luck, Ms. Lucy.”

“Are you not going to give me the address to the ranch?”

“Maybe.” He looked down at me with glittering eyes.

“Maybe?”

“If you do one thing for me?”

“What’s that?” Please don’t ask me for my boyfriend’s name!

“How sure are you about marrying that Hamilton boy?” He stared into my eyes and I held my breath.

“Why?”

“Because you’re a very attractive woman.” He grinned and his lips came closer to me. “I’d hate to think that the rest of us will never have a chance with you.”

“Well, you never know …” I wanted him to kiss me. I knew it was crazy, but I really wanted him to kiss me.

“Oh, yeah?”

It was as if he’d heard my thoughts because suddenly his lips were on mine and he was kissing me. I pressed my lips against his and reached up and ran my hands through his hair. He pulled back a moment later. He pressed his fingers against my lips, his eyes blazing as he stared down at me. “Well good luck with everything, Lucy.” He nodded his head and stepped back. “Enjoy Montana.”

I swallowed hard. “The … the address?”

“Oh, I think Chip can give you the address. He knows where it is, as well.” He lifted his cowboy hat, gave me a slight nod, and then walked out of the bar.

“Well, he was nice,” I said to Chip, who looked amused. “I hope everyone in Montana is as nice as you guys.”

“Oh, yeah. Austin’s a real good one. I think you’ll find that most everyone here in the Bitterroot Valley is very, very nice. Hold on. I’ll get a pen and paper and I’ll write you down the address.”

“Thank you, Chip. I really appreciate it.”

“Oh, you’re welcome, Ms. Lucy. I have a feeling I’ll be seeing more of you soon. The ranch isn’t that far away.”

“Oh, great. That sounds amazing.”

“And I wouldn’t be surprised if you’d be seeing Austin again soon, too.”

“Oh, yeah? He lives close to here as well?”

“Yeah. We’re the only bar in a hundred-mile radius, so everyone comes here after a long day at work.”

“Wow. I guess this is really small-town living.”

“Yeah, I guess it’s going to be a big change for you, being a city girl and all.”

“Yeah, that is true.”

“So, now that Austin’s gone, I don’t suppose you happen to know which of the Hamilton boys you’ll be marrying?”

“Sorry, what?” I swallowed hard.

“Well, I figured if you know the parents, but you don’t seem to know the boy, you’ve been speaking with just the parents?”

“Uh …um …,” I stammered, “kind of? Okay, I didn’t want to say anything with that guy here, but I’m kind of here for an arranged marriage.” How had Chip guessed?

“Oh, yeah?” He started laughing. “Really? Oh boy, Amelia and Ranger are going to get into trouble.”

“Oh, no. What do you mean?”

“Their sons are not going to be happy. You don’t happen to know which son?”

“I guess it’s the oldest son?” I shrugged. “I don’t really know much. It’s kind of a long, complicated story.”

“The oldest one, huh?” He grabbed a bottle from the wall and chugged it. “Yeehaw! This is going to be a fun week! I can just tell.”

“Oh, yeah?

“Oh, yeah! Well, good luck, Lucy. I have a feeling you’re going to need it.”

“Well, thank you, Chip.” I wanted to ask more but I was too scared. What did he know about the Hamiltons that I didn’t? At least he was laughing and not warning me away. So presumably they weren’t psychopathic killers.

“Oh, well,” I grabbed the address, “I guess I should be going now. Meet the in-laws and everything.”

“Good luck, girl,” he chuckled. “Good luck.”