The Princess & Her Alphaholes by Renee O’Roark
Chapter Four
After Party
Connor
I find a dark corner backstage and inhale deeply, letting the air fill my lungs and holding my breath for a few seconds, trying to calm my nerves. If I tighten the strings of my guitar anymore, I’ll make them snap off and I’m already on my spare set.
“Contestant number twelve, you’re up in five!”
Someone shouts my number and I let out a shuddering breath. My agent is convinced that I’d be a perfect fit for Torn Stars so I went to the first few auditions and at first I wasn’t nervous at all. I mean, whatever, right? As if the most famous pop band on the planet would take on Connor Todd, unknown singer and guitarist that keeps getting kicked out of every band he joins.
I swear it’s nothing I’m doing wrong, actually if anything, I’m doing everything right. I’ve been in three bands so far and things went awesome until each band got a shred of notoriety.
My first band that we formed in high school got invited to tour with a mildly popular local band and felt I was no longer a good fit.
All because Jonesy, my high school bestie, was salty about this girl he liked who chose me over him. Not that she was worth us splitting up over her, as soon as my second band got picked up by a label, she dumped me for the drummer and guess what? I got kicked out again. Because he was uncomfortable with his girl’s ex being in the band. Fucking unprofessional twat!
The last debacle at least wasn’t due to pussy, the band got hired for a series of live performances in Vegas and since the music would be mostly recorded, we were supposed to do a live dance number. And I was born with two fucking left feet.
This is why when my agent insisted that I auditioned for Torn Stars, I laughed in his face. I’m more of a rocker than a pop artist and all this boy band shit where you’re supposed to dance isn’t my jam.
But then my agent pointed out how the band danced in their videos but most of their live performances didn’t have much dancing because the guys play their instruments live. He told me that if I got taken on, I could hire a coach to learn how to dance. And Chaz Atwood was my myth, so filling his spot in his old band would be unbelievable, a real dream come true.
“Connor, you’re next. Good luck!”
Marcie Anne, a contestant from Georgia runs past me after performing for the judges and barely makes it off the backstage area that I hear convulsing, retching sounds. She was really pale before she went on and I guess the stress finally got to her.
She’s been one of the few contestants who have been nice to me, so I feel bad that I can’t go check on her, when I get literally pushed on stage.
I take a few stumbling steps, blinded by the sudden brightness of the lights and try to focus my gaze on the judges sitting at a long table right before the first row of seats in the mostly empty theater.
There are cameras filming us, even though this event won’t be televised but short clips will be used in tomorrow’s live show.
I immediately recognize Cruise Crawford, Campbell Lachlan and Colton Maxwell, the three members of Torn Stars sitting at the judges’ table. There’s a pretty brunette girl in a leotard sitting between Campbell and Colton, a tall, bald guy and that bossy lady from the record label.
These are the people I need to impress to get through to the next round.
I begin my audition by playing and singing ‘Abilene,’ Torn Stars’s last single. I wanted to sing one of my own songs but my agent said it was too big a risk, so I’m covering their latest success, especially since it’s a slow ballad that’s perfect to be played just on the guitar.
I’ve never felt the way the song describes for any girl but I decide to look into the green eyes of the girl in dance clothes to mimic the emotions that the song portrays.
And something magic happens while I sing; that gaze anchors me in place and makes my voice soar higher, my fingers move on the strings of my guitar as if they were guided by something powerful, something that every human being longs for but very few get to feel in their life time:
She’s the girl that I love
This I’ll scream and shout
That she’s mine and I’m hers
And I can’t live without …
Her love
Love
The look in her eyes
The dream that she is
When I see her smile
She makes me believe
The touch of her skin
The kiss of her lips
The tease in her sway
The way that she quips
She’s the girl that I love
This I’ll scream and shout
That she’s mine and I’m hers
And I can’t live without …
Her love
Love
Her beautiful soul
Her big loving heart
Not even my flaws
Will keep us apart
She loves like she lives
She doesn’t hold back
Her innocent kiss
I’ll never forget
She’s the girl that I love
This I’ll scream and shout
That she’s mine and I’m hers
And I can’t live without …
Her love
Love
I pray all the gods
The ones from above
That she chooses me
And gives me her love
She makes me feel whole
When she calls my name
Her beautiful love
Erases my shame
She’s the girl that I love
This I’ll scream and shout
That she’s mine and I’m hers
And I can’t live without …
Her love
Love
Stay always with me
I swear I won’t lie
I love you too much
Without you I’ll die
I let this unknown emotion flow through me and as the last notes of the song ebb away, I see that I have their attention.
All the judges are looking at me. Campbell Lachlan is leaning forward, scribbling something on the score sheet in front of him.
I still feel the girl’s green gaze on me and I’m so wrapped up in the residual emotions from the song I just performed that I don’t hear the label manager when she speaks to me.
“Connor! Are you going to dance for us today or what? There’s eight more contestants after you.”
“Uhm, yeah. Sorry.”
I shake it off and when one of the most upbeat songs from Torn Stars starts playing, I embarrass myself with my white boy two beats dance.
I can see everyone’s face falling and I know I blew it when the label manager stands up to whisper in the ear of leotard girl. I can’t hear what they’re saying but it can’t be good, right?
The girl nods first and says something back, then shakes her head and I’m pretty sure that my fate is sealed.
So when I walk backstage, I start packing all my things, sure that there’s no way in hell that I’m going through to the next stage of the contest.
* * *