I Do (Hate You) by Sienna Blake

Shell

I had the best dream. My favorites were usually sex dreams, but this was even better. I didn’t even know what to call it.

A “cuddle dream,” maybe?

It was one of those where you are nice and snuggly and toasty smooshed up to a man’s chest with his arm wrapped around you. The kind where you couldn’t imagine feeling any safer or any happier and you would only move if the room was in flames and probably not until the bottom of the bed caught fire.

Then I realized I was awake.

Which meant this wasn’t a dream.

This was real life on the day of my wedding and I was snuggled up with James instead of with my fiancé and oh yeah, WE WERE STILL HANDCUFFED TOGETHER.

In the dream, I didn’t want to get out of bed. In real life, I was thinking of ways to gnaw my own arm off. Unfortunately, James’s massive arm was wrapped around me and his cuffed hand was cupping my naked breast. The towel I had worn to bed was now tangled under the sheets somewhere at my feet and…and…what was that?

It took me a minute to process that James had some massive morning wood, and his penis was nestled in between the cheeks of my bum. Not in a sexual way, more in a hotdog staying warm in a bun sort of way.

James sighed a contented sigh in his sleep and pushed closer to me, his massive palm gently holding onto my breast, his cock poking out the top of my bum cheeks. He was the very last person on earth that I wanted to speak to at that moment, but I would have to wake him up if I was going to put any space between us. We were so entangled that I’d have to dislocate my shoulder to get out from underneath our cuffed arms by myself.

I poked him, hoping that would wake him up.

Nope.

Then I rattled the chain of the handcuff, thinking that might pull him out of his slumber. He gave a little snuffle into my hair and moved his hand from my breast. Finally!

Uh-oh. Where was that hand going?

James slowly slid his hand down my belly and in between my thighs. Again, not in a sexual way, just in a cuddly way, trying to keep his hand warm. I could tell he was still asleep by his even breathing.

But still.

Before I could figure out what to do, I thought about cuddling with Rupert. Or rather, not cuddling with Rupert. Even after sex, Rupert and I normally gave each other a peck on the lips then retreated to our different sides of the bed. James and I were more like a pile of puppies trying to stay warm and cozy.

James started to stir again. I thought I would give him a minute to wake up before I told him to get the fuck off of me. Once he woke up, he would surely move his hands away from my thighs and…

Oh my…God…that felt good.

Apparently, James was amazing in bed even when he was unconscious. When he stirred in his sleep, he had moved his hands just a bit and his fingers had brushed up against me before coming back between my thighs.

Fuck this guy. Seriously. Although I’m sure he would fuck me if I just woke him up. And God knew at that moment, an orgasm would go a long way toward settling my nerves and distracting me from the shit show that was my life.

But I was engaged! Letting another man touch me would be a violation of the promise that I had made to Rupert.

Waaaaaait a minute… It would be a violation if James touched me…but if I touched myself…hmmm.

When James moved his cuffed hand back to my upper thigh, he’d left my cuffed hand resting right on top of the little thatch of hair that I had left from last week’s bikini wax. I knew exactly where my G spot was, and I should be able to come in less than two minutes with the right inspiration. As much as I hated James, that muscled arm now resting on my hip and his huge hand between my thighs was definitely inspiration. And to be honest, I didn’t hate the cock resting between my cheeks.

I slowly, carefully slid my finger inside me and swallowed a little whimper of pleasure as I teased my clit with the tip of my pinky. I tried not to rock back against James, but it was almost impossible not to. I switched to my middle finger, stroking back and forth, getting wetter, getting closer to an orgasm. I was almost there…so close…so…fucking…

“What are you doing?”

“Oh shit!”

I screamed it. Not like a scream of passion, a scream of getting busted in the world’s most embarrassing way.

“Me? What? Nothing. I’m not doing anything,” I mumbled.

“Were you playing with yourself while you were in bed with me, handcuffed and…” James lifted the covers to check before adding, “Naked?”

“Eeugh, gross. That’s ridiculous. Get away from me,” I said, trying to pull away.

Instead he pulled me closer. “Wait a second. I’m not complaining. It is an absolute turn-on to see you finger yourself while I watch. Shit, I think I learned a few things, but you should just admit it. You were pleasuring yourself while handcuffed to me. By the sound of your moans, I think I accidentally interrupted you before the, um, finale. You know, I could finish that off for you in a thousand different ways.”

He had moved his lips to my ear and whispered, “I could use my tongue.”

“No.” I meant it to come out emphatically but instead it sounded more like a sigh.

“What about my fingers? I know exactly where to put them.”

I managed to say, “That’s a bad idea.”

“What about I take my cock and—”

“That’s it! No. This is my wedding day! Or it’s supposed to be. Get off of me and kindly remove that cock from its current resting place!”

He scooted his body a little, moving his penis from my cheeks, but the tip of it still poked me in the back. I would have rolled over to get away from him but that would mean I’d have to look him in the face and his dick would just poke me in the stomach.

“We have got to figure out how to disentangle ourselves,” I said.

“Okay, but first just admit that you want me as much as I want you.”

“I will not.”

“Fine. Will you at least admit that we have crazy chemistry? We can’t be blamed for that. That’s just biological. Nothing we can do about chemistry other than to have a ton of sex to get it out of our systems.”

I got so mad that I flipped over, and my hand that had been on my clit landed on his giant cock. He let out a gasp of surprise and pleasure before I came to my senses and pulled it away.

“That was an accident,” I said, not meeting his eyes.

“A happy accident. Just admit that we have chemistry. There’s no shame in that.”

I sighed and admitted it. “Fine. We have chemistry, but chemistry isn’t enough if you don’t have feelings for me. You don’t, do you?”

Before he could answer, my phone started vibrating on the bedside table. I rolled over. The screen flashed Miguel. I answered it.

“Where in the fuckity fuck are you?”

“Hi, Miguel.”

“Your makeup artist is here in your villa and you are not here in your villa. Where are you?”

“I’m at James’s,” I admitted.

“I’ll be there in two minutes and I’m bringing the girls!”

“Wait, don’t—”

But he’d already hung up.

“James?” I asked as calmly as I could manage.

“Uh-huh?” he said in a low voice near my ear, still in sexy mode.

“We have ninety seconds to get on some clothes and get to your front door.”

James put on a t-shirt on that we’d cut up and pinned over the handcuffs last night. He jumped into a pair of shorts, then helped me put on the little string halter top from yesterday and pull my shorts up.

We shuffled into the bathroom together and I squirted toothpaste into both of our mouths straight from the tube. We reached the front door and opened it just as Miguel, Claire and Talia reached the little porch.

James didn’t bother hiding behind the door this time. We were busted and there was nothing else to do.

“Did you not find the keys?” Miguel asked.

“Does it look like I found the keys?” I snapped back, still annoyed and angry that he had told the girls without asking me first.

“Whoa. What’s with the attitude?” he asked while Claire and Talia took a step back and James tried to but couldn’t.

“I said stall the girls, not blab to the girls,” I protested.

“Honey, he tried,” Talia said. “He made us go sailing then snorkeling then hunting for shells, then get full mani-pedis and facials before we could escape yesterday. We knew something was up, we just didn’t know what until now.”

“I tried to keep them busy and tell them that we just kept missing you in between activities,” Miguel said, hand on hip and looking ready for a fight.

“We would probably still be at the spa right now except we got scared and left when the only thing left on the spa menu was a Brazilian bikini wax followed by anal bleaching.”

“Don’t knock it ’til you try it,” Miguel said. He stuck out his hand to fist bump James, who looked a little scared but intrigued.

“I’m sorry, guys. I really am,” I said. “It’s just that I am overwhelmed at the idea that I have to tell Rupert that I can’t marry him today because I’m handcuffed to another man.”

Claire, Talia, and Miguel folded me into a group hug while James awkwardly stood to the side with his arm in the circle like he was at the part of the “Hokey Pokey” song where you put your hand in.

Once we’d hugged it out and sniffled a bit, we stepped apart. Claire picked up our cuffed hands, bending her head to look at the lock.

“Yeah, I got this,” she said.

James perked up. “Got what?”

Claire didn’t answer. She pulled a pin out of her hair and dropped to one knee between us, one eyeball close to the cuffs.

“What is happening right now?” James asked. I could only stare.

“Shhh,” Claire insisted. We all stood in bug-eyed silence while she stuck the pin in the lock and dug around, her tongue hanging out in concentration.

After a few seconds we heard a loud click. A few seconds later, there was a second click. Claire straightened and held the handcuffs over her head in celebration.

James rubbed his left wrist while I rubbed my right, a little stiff and sore but ecstatic to be able to move normally again.

“How the holy hell do you know how to unlock handcuffs with a hair pin, Claire? Are you a magician? Or a bank robber?” Miguel asked.

She shrugged. “We all have our talents.”

“Mine are cooking and salsa dancing,” he responded. “Your talent seems more like a felony.”

“Only if you get caught,” she said with a coy smile.

“We have got to delve into this but after the wedding!” Talia insisted. “Now it is time to get Shell up to the bridal villa and make her presentable. Girl, I love you, but you look like a bag lady. Your makeup artist will need as much time as possible making you into the beautiful bride that you deserve to be. Come on, let’s go!”

Claire and Miguel nodded. All three of them headed for the door.

“Just give me a minute,” I said. “I need to ask James something.”

“Seriously, you don’t have time,” Miguel urged.

“I’ll make time.”

Something in my voice made my trio of friends quickly creep away. I didn’t speak until I heard the door click behind them.

“You never answered my question,” I said.

“Uhhh, what question?”

I folded my arms across my chest. “You know what question.”

James swallowed, then let out a nervous laugh. “The answer is ‘Yes, I will have sex with you.’”

“That wasn’t the question.”

“Okay, the answer is ‘Yes, we can sneak out of here together and hop a plane back to Sydney, so you don’t have to marry Rupert.”

“I don’t have time for you to be a loveable scamp, James. I need you to be a man right now. Just answer the question.”

I took another step toward him, putting us even closer than we had been when we were handcuffed. I felt a little shiver of electricity at being so near to him, but by my own choice this time.

“So?” I pressed.

“It’s complicated…” he started to say, but I cut him off.

“No, it’s not. It is a very simple question. James Kane, do you have feelings for me?”

His eyes moved down my body, taking in my lips and breasts and thighs, the longing clear on his face. I already knew he wanted my body, I needed to know if he wanted the rest of me.

“Shell, this isn’t just a boy-meets-girl situation. I swore to your brother that I would never date you. I also know that you’re not the kind of girl you just screw around with for fun. With you it would have to be…”

“Have to be what?”

“Be more than that.” He trailed off without explaining exactly what he meant. But I thought I knew.

“You’re right,” I said. “I’m not the kind of girl you just ‘screw around with for fun.’ That’s why Rupert wants to marry me. He knows that I’m someone who is precious enough to keep.”

“Shell.”

“Save it, James! I am so pissed off that I almost cheated on my fiancé with you!”

I had real feelings for James, but I had always stuffed them down deep, afraid that he didn’t return them. The last twenty-four hours made me feel like I’d been wrong about his lack of feelings, but I had to be sure. If he told me he didn’t care for me, then I could walk away and marry Rupert with a clear conscience. But if James did care, it would change everything.

“James, I need to know if there’s something between us.”

He stepped forward and pulled me roughly to him, his mouth on mine, his tongue parting my lips, his hands exploring my body, then pulling me so close that I could barely breathe.

It was magical and wonderful and life-affirming.

Then he pulled back and whispered in my ear, “There is something between us. We have this. Can’t this be enough?”

It was heartbreaking.

I pushed him back and turned away. “Goodbye, James.”