Beneath the Surface by Emily McIntire
Lily
Idon’t have many friends, unless you count Annabelle, a server who works with me at Dina’s Diner. But we’re more acquaintances than anything, and we honestly have nothing in common other than living in the same town, running away from everyone we know back home. Although her idea of running is thirty minutes outside of Phoenix where she’s from, and mine is disappearing for good and hoping they think I’m dead.
Other than her, I’m all alone. And even though growing up I surrounded myself with people and parties, I’ve come to appreciate the solitude. Besides, working my fingers to the bone just to put food on the table doesn’t leave a lot of room for things like going out and meeting people.
And I’m okay with that.
There’s not much you can say to convince me that friends are worth it in the end, anyway. So, when Alex decides he wants to be my friend, I’m taken aback. And I’m not going to let it happen. There’s no point. I don’t need friends, and he’s really nothing special, other than the fact he’s the first man in years who doesn’t make my skin crawl just by looking at me.
I’m not really sure what to do with that realization other than acknowledge it, and let it go. But he’s the first man that I’ve felt that way about ever. Even when I was dating Darryl, it wasn’t because of his good looks or his charm.
I was groomed by him.
A naive fourteen-year-old girl who was desperate and stupid. And Darryl was a twenty-year-old drug dealer pedophile who knew he could drag me down and keep me in chains. My stomach rolls as I think back to how we met, and all of the years after. All of the years before.
I must wear my weakness like armor—my shield a magnet, drawing up evil that lurks within everyone who dares to get too close.
And it’s not just men. My childhood best friend’s greed and selfishness sprouted wings and took flight whenever I was around, too. I was just blind to it, fooled just like the rest of the town with her girl next door act.
But instead of being loyal to me, she used me to get to my brother. She pushed me out of the chambers of his heart, made him forget all the words he said to me growing up. Made him forget that he was my home. Until suddenly, he didn’t see me at all.
He only saw her.
So fuck having friends. Been there. Done that. Bought the getaway ticket. I have zero interest in uncovering Alex’s fatal traits.
It’s a few hours later when I’m refilling the sugar caddies, getting ready to be off my shift for the night, that I hear it.
Annabelle’s tinkling laughter coming from the corner booth.
My head snaps up, my chest pulling tight when I see her standing next to Alex with a hand on her hip and a beaming smile on her Maybelline-caked face.
Good. Maybe his attention will leave me, and end up on her, and I won’t have to focus on how much he unsettles me.
He grins at her, his expansive arms stretching against the back of the booth. My heartbeat picks up speed, my breath lodging in my throat as my eyes flick back and forth between them.
Her hand reaches out, her bright pink press-on nails wrapping around a laminated menu, her breasts practically grazing his face, when suddenly his eyes snap over to me.
I jerk, the sugar packets falling from my hand and onto the table. Heat rushes into my cheeks as I clear my throat and glance down, scrambling to pick up the pink and blue packets and place them in the caddie.
Ugh. Great. Quit looking, Lily.
But a few seconds later, I can’t stop myself from glancing up again. Annabelle’s hand has now latched onto his forearm as she leans across the table and points to something on the menu.
Oh, so now he’s hungry.
Finishing up the rest of the table fills, I head over to where Annabelle is standing, knowing that I shouldn’t interrupt. That I shouldn’t care. But I do it anyway. I feel weirdly possessive over this stranger that I’ve shared nothing more than a few moments with.
But they were my moments, and my chest squeezes at the idea that maybe she’ll get them too.
“Annabelle, I’m off for the night. Everyone’s cashed out except for the guys at table three, but I’ll just transfer them.”
She turns to me, her auburn hair swinging in a high ponytail, a genuine smile gracing her face. “You don’t want the tip?”
I shrug, feeling Alex’s eyes burn holes into the side of my face. “I want to go home more.”
She nods. “I get it. No problem.”
“You never cashed me out,” Alex’s voice cuts in.
Annabelle glances at him. “Oh, I have zero problem taking you over.”
His eyes flick to hers before coming back to meet mine. “Well, that wouldn’t be very fair. I was hers first.” He smirks like he’s teasing, and a nervous twinge spikes low in my belly.
I bite the inside of my cheek and smile big. “Oh, I don’t mind.”
His grin dims just a bit. “You sure?”
“You tipped me more than enough yesterday to last a lifetime.”
It’s not true. That money is already gone, sucked down into the hole I can never climb out from, but I need him to get the picture that whatever he’s trying to accomplish with me—whatever it is he thinks will happen, won’t.
The only reason someone comes to Raindale is so they can disappear. And he couldn’t disappear if he tried, so I’m wary of why he’s even here in the first place.
His brows draw in, a toothpick rolling back and forth over his lips, and my cheeks hurt from the strain of keeping a chipper face in place.
“Okay, Lily.” Annabelle’s eyes widen as she looks at me. “Have a good night.”
I nod, relief loosening the knot that was forming in my stomach, and I turn around to do my check out and get home to what matters. I’m just grabbing my purse from the back office when the door busts open, and Annabelle comes rushing in, her cheeks flushed and a smile high on her lips.
“Oh my God, Lily, can you believe someone that fine is here?”
I laugh, rolling my apron strings up and tucking it away in my purse. “He’s different, that’s for sure.”
“He’s a work of art. Fucking gorgeous.” She swoons. “I wonder if he lives in Phoenix. That’s not too far, I could totally convince him to let me come down for the weekend.”
I shrug, ignoring the pinch in my chest. “Says he’s staying at the Motel Eight here in town.”
“Oh, really? That’s even better.” She pauses. “Hey, speaking of Phoenix, me and some of my hometown girls are going out this weekend. You should come.”
I cringe. “Uhh… no thanks, I don’t have anyone to watch Chase.”
She pouts. “Can’t your neighbor do it? Just one night, Lily. You’re this big ball of energy, but you never do anything fun.”
I laugh, my brow rising. “You ever live with a three-year-old?”
Her nose scrunches as she shakes her head.
“Exactly. Try that first, and then come back and tell me my energy doesn’t have an outlet.”
“Well, whatever. I’m gonna keep pushing until you give in.”
“Good luck.” I walk out the door, waving at her behind my back.
As I head home, a tendril of sadness weaves its way around my heart, because Annabelle isn’t wrong. I don’t go out at all anymore. Don’t have any money, or any time to do it. Shots of my old life flash before my eyes, back when I used to be the life of the party. Before things got so bad I couldn’t fake it.
Sometimes I miss that life.
But then I shake my head, reminding myself of how far I’ve come, and I go home and pick up Chase, cuddling him on the couch while we watch an old Disney movie and fall asleep.
This is all I need.
Right here.
Friends are overrated.