Lost and Found Family by Jennifer Ryan

Sarah opened her eyes and found Luke staring at her. She was surprised to see him, and disoriented, but his warm smile and the feel of his hand brushing over her hair grounded her and made her heart trip.

“Good morning, darlin’.”

She loved the sound of his deep voice and the warmth in his words. “Hi. Am I sleeping on your kitchen table?”

The charming grin made her belly flutter. “Yes, you are.”

“Great.” Embarrassment warmed her cheeks. “How long have I been here?”

Luke leaned in. “That’s a complex question. You’ve been asleep for nearly a whole day. You got out of bed about an hour ago and sleepwalked down here to the kitchen. But if you want the bigger question answered, according to Jack, you’re really old, thirty-two. So that’s how long you’ve been here.”

“Are you laughing at me?”

“A little bit. You sure are pretty when you’re rested and lying on my table.”

Not inclined to move from her spot in front of him—and Luke looked content to have her there, offered up like Thanksgiving dinner—she rolled to her side and laid her head on her arm to look at him. Luke sat back and she drank in the sight of his sexy bare chest, beard-scruffy jaw, and tousled golden hair.

“Is Margaret really mad?”

“She’s definitely riled. Since you didn’t wake up by dinner, she called and asked if I’d take the boys because she was afraid to put them to bed upstairs. If they woke up in the night, she wouldn’t be able to hear them. And I think getting up those stairs is simply too difficult for her with her arthritis. I think she was afraid she might fall.”

“I’ve noticed she never goes upstairs. I’m glad she called you. Are the boys okay? They must be worried.”

“They’re asleep upstairs. They worried about you for about five minutes.”

She raised a brow.

“They got a good look at you sleeping while the doctor checked you out.”

She pressed her hand to her head. “I vaguely remember someone poking at me.”

“You did not want to wake up. The doctor gave you a once-over, including a vitamin shot, and said to go ahead and let you sleep. It was the best medicine.”

“You didn’t need to call a doctor to come out here.”

“You collapsed and then you wouldn’t wake up,” he snapped, letting his deep concern show. “Sorry.”

Her heart ached. She hated that she’d scared him. “You were really worried.”

“More than I can say.” He raked his fingers through his tousled hair. “Once the boys knew you were okay, we played ball, video games, and roasted hot dogs over the firepit. Once they were sufficiently dirty and tired, I gave them a bath in the big tub, full of bubbles, read them a couple stories, and put them to bed.” Luke grinned. “We had a great time. I love those boys.”

“You do?” She believed him. She just didn’t expect him to express it so easily.

“What’s not to love? Their mother has done a great job raising them. They kicked my ass at some of the video games. They know a bunch of secret codes to make themselves invincible. I couldn’t get them to reveal the codes. Anyway, we have a lot to talk about. Are you fully awake now?”

“Yes, why?”

“Because I want to tell you that you scared the hell out of me!” His voice started out soft, but by the time he got to the end of the sentence the anger spilled out with his words. “When I think of what could have happened if you weren’t here with me . . .”

Sarah raised up and faced him, leaning on one arm. “Luke, I’m sorry I frightened you. Don’t you think it scares the hell out of me to wake up on your kitchen table not knowing how long I’ve been asleep, or what might have happened to my boys? They’re everything to me. Don’t you think I’m sitting here thanking God that you were here to take care of us? Don’t you think I have a thousand different scenarios going through my mind about what might have happened to them if I’d hurt them, or myself? This is killing me and I’m so sorry that you’ve had to put your life on hold to take care of us.”

Her words set off a deep frown on Luke’s handsome face. “I love having you and the boys here. I’ve told you several times now that I don’t want you to go. Apparently, that hasn’t sunk in yet. So, let me say it again. I want you and those boys here with me. I want you to be with me.”

“I want that, too.”

“Then help me make it happen. Work reasonable hours. I know it’s a long commute from here to Silicon Valley, but I could set up an office for you here. We’ll figure something out, depending on what you need. And Abby has called way too much. I finally had to threaten to sue her for harassment if she didn’t stop calling every half hour to see if you were awake. She’s really great. She cares a lot about you. Anyway, I took care of what I could. She’ll call later today to update you on what’s happening.”

“What do you mean you took care of what you could?”

“Apparently Evan leaked to the press that you’ve finished the Knox Project and it far exceeds expectations. They want to set up a bunch of interviews immediately. I told her not to schedule anything, that you didn’t want to do the interviews anyway, and the press would see you at the benefit. As far as the dress you need, I asked Abby to get you something. She’ll send it tomorrow.”

“Oh God. You have no idea what you’ve done.”

“You said you didn’t want to do the interviews. Putting them off a week won’t matter, will it?”

She waved that away. “No, not that. Thank you for putting that off. It’s the dress. You have no idea what Abby will pick. She’s wanted to make me over forever. I have no idea what she’ll send. She thinks I dress too conservative.”

“Well, if you don’t like it, you’ll have time to get something else.”

Luke settled back in his seat, an empty coffee cup and plate between them.

“I guess I should get the boys back to Margaret’s, so you can have your house back and get to work.”

“Sarah, it’s about three in the morning. The boys are sleeping.”

She looked around the kitchen and at the dark windows. “Is it that early? Why are you having breakfast now? Are you going somewhere?”

“No, sweetheart. I’m up because you got out of bed and sleepwalked down here to make me breakfast.”

“What?” She’d done some bizarre things while sleepwalking.

“When you got out of bed, I followed you down here to be sure you didn’t go outside. You pushed me into this chair and proceeded to make breakfast. I thought you were hungry after sleeping so long, but you put the plate in front of me, folded your arms, and waited for me to dig in. Once I did, you got up on the table and went back to sleep. Breakfast was great, by the way. I love French toast and eggs.”

She couldn’t believe he’d been so thoughtful. “I can’t believe I slept so long.”

“My opinion: since you finished the Knox Project, your subconscious knew it was a good time to take a break.” Luke stood and stared down at her. “So let’s go back to bed.” He scooped her up into his arms and headed out of the kitchen to the stairs without giving her an opportunity to protest or think.

Luke took the stairs like her added weight didn’t faze him and stopped outside his bedroom door. He set her down, sighed with a wistful look at the bed, and took her hand and led her down the hall to one of the spare rooms. Luke pushed the door open, revealing the boys sound asleep together in the queen-size bed. Luke had brought the boys’ night-light from Margaret’s house, their toys littered the floor, and their clothes were stacked neatly on the dresser, their tiny shoes on the hardwood. He’d thought of everything.

She gave each of her sons a kiss on the head before she and Luke left the room.

Luke took her hand again and led her to his room.

She stopped and tugged on his hand. “Luke, I can’t sleep with you. What would the boys think?”

“Jack told me I needed to stay with you, that you needed lots of hugs.”

“Really?” Her heart melted that her little boy wanted Luke to take care of her. “They must be wondering what’s going on.”

“I promised them I would keep you safe. Jack said he liked sleeping with Nick, and that you always sleep alone, even his dad didn’t sleep with you. Odd that a wife doesn’t sleep with her husband. Then I remembered something you told me. You said I was the first man you’d kissed in five years. Nick is only four so that put Jack’s comment about his dad not sleeping with you in perspective. So, I’m going to ask you something. Did Sean love you? Because it’s obvious he wasn’t in love with you.”

Sarah sighed and raked her fingers through her already sleep-tousled hair. “Why would he love me? No one else ever did.” She stepped away and wrapped her arms around her middle; then, knowing he was looking for more answers, she gave him the unvarnished truth. “I mistook his needing me for love. But it wasn’t. And Sean stopped pretending it was more than just business. It was always, ‘You have to get these projects done, so we get paid. Here’re another five projects, hurry up or our employees won’t get paid.’ He got what he wanted, and I got a piece of what I wanted.”

Luke’s gaze narrowed. “So he got the business and you got . . . what? You grew up poor, but money doesn’t seem to be your motivator.”

“I grew up alone,” she corrected him.

Luke’s eyes went bright with understanding. “You wanted a family.”

“I had the boys, but we were never a family. Sean was all consumed with the company and money. He was never part of the family life I created at home with the boys. He was too busy out having a good time. Sure, he’d drum up business. He liked to schmooze the clients. But there was also a lot of travel to exotic places. He liked to live the life of a wealthy mogul.”

“But the boys have dozens of wonderful memories about their father.”

“Jack was about four and Nick wasn’t even two when Sean died. How much do you think they really remember? I didn’t want them to remember that Sean was never there, or that when he was, he couldn’t be bothered with them. That’s no way for a son to remember his father, so I took what little time Sean did spend with them and made it seem like that was how he was all the time.”

“You lied.” He seemed surprised and upset by it.

“Yes. No child should ever feel like they aren’t wanted.” She’d felt that way all too often. Even now, she had to remind herself that she had a good life, the boys, and that was enough. “I didn’t want the boys to grow up remembering Sean couldn’t even take the time to hug them.”

Luke brushed his fingertips down the side of her face and placed his hand on her shoulder. “That’s not right. They deserve better. And so do you, sweetheart.”

“I’ve had to fight and work for everything in my life. I want the boys to have everything I never had.”

“They have you to love them the way you were never loved. They feel that. They know it. They’re happy.” His hand swept up the side of her neck and his thumb brushed along her jaw. “All I want to do is make you happy.”

She leaned into his touch. “You do.”

“Why did you stay with him so long?”

“I’d planned to leave, but certain circumstances warranted my caution in just walking out.”

“What circumstances?”

“The boys, for one. I needed to have the means to support them when I left. I’d started doing some side work. Something fun and creative. I loved it and wanted to change my focus. When it sold big, I knew I could make a decent living. Sean found out what I was up to and threatened to use the boys to get me to continue to work for him.”

Luke frowned. “He tried to blackmail you with a custody fight?”

“Without me, the company would have folded before it went public.”

Luke held her gaze. “It must have been really frustrating, disappointing, and heartbreaking to be used like that. And then he threatened you on top of it.”

“Sean didn’t care how he got what he wanted or how I felt about it. In the end, there was no love, if there ever was any, or kindness left between us. I was just a means to an end. The boys just pawns in his games.”

“Life hasn’t been kind to you.”

“But you are. The gift you gave me . . . It’s the nicest thing anyone’s ever done for me.”

Luke cupped her face. “You gave me something I never thought I’d have and believe it was real.”

She tilted her head and stared up at him. “What?”

“You might not remember, but you told me you love me.”

A wave of understanding overlapped her initial shock. She couldn’t believe she’d blurted out such a thing. And the reality of how much she loved him hit her right in the heart.

She and Luke may have lived very different lives, but they wanted the same things. Love and family.

He kissed her softly, then ended the sweet, tempting kiss too soon and pressed his forehead to hers. “Say it again. Please.” All his need filled that plea and she couldn’t deny him something he’d always wanted and seemed happy to finally have.

“It’s true.” Her heart simply couldn’t deny it, even if at one time she’d thought herself in love with another. But that had been nothing but lies and manipulations. In the end, she realized that she’d never loved Sean, because she never knew who he really was until it was too late. She loved the dream of them. Reality shattered that.

But Luke was real. What she felt for him made that dream come to life in her mind in a new and real way that gave her hope, because Luke wouldn’t promise something he didn’t mean.

So she looked him in the eye, took a chance, and laid her heart on the line. “I love you.”

His eyes went bright with a joy that lit up her heart.

“Good, because I’m so inlove with you.” The words held an honesty only Luke could make her believe.

A huge grin spread across his face. “You know, sleeping next to you and not being able to touch you has driven me past the point of my endurance.”

Yet he didn’t make a move.

The building anticipation made her desperate to touch him. “I wish I remembered sleeping next to you.” She wanted to feel his big body pressed to hers.

His fingers slipped to the back of her neck and he pulled her a little closer so their breaths mingled and she saw all the desire blazing in his eyes. “Is that all you wish we’d done?” One finger swept up her neck, sending a shiver down her spine.

“That would have been really nice. But I want—”

His lips swept over hers in a barely there kiss that left her burning. “What do you want?” The husky whispered words turned up the heat.

“You.”

He pulled her in as she went up on tiptoe to meet him in the middle. His mouth captured hers just as her breasts pressed against his hard chest and her arms went around his neck. The second he touched her, all her attention focused on how wonderful he felt against her. She loved the feel and texture of his mouth as his tongue slid along hers. He tasted like coffee, maple syrup, and temptation all mixed together, while the scent of him, some kind of tangy soap that hinted toward lime, filled her nose.

He hit all her senses, leaving her enveloped in everything Luke.

His hands roamed down her back, over her hips, and cupped her backside, pulling her closer and molding her to his hands. Her belly pressed against his hard erection and she moved against him, smiling against his lips when he moaned with pure pleasure. She’d never felt more powerful or sexy in her life than she did in his arms.

He picked her up and laid her down in the middle of the already rumpled bed and leaned over her. “Say it again.”

She ran her hands up his wide bare chest and felt his heart pounding against her palm. She looked him in the eye and gave him what he wanted. “I love you.” She could live on his joyous grin.

“I’m going to show you how much I love you.” The searing kiss sealed that promise. Luke’s big hand sliding between her breasts and down her stomach made her anticipate every sensual moment to come.

He kissed the line of her jaw and down her neck. She turned her head to give him better access and slid her hands along his broad shoulders and back, up his neck until her fingers slid through his soft golden hair.

One of his work-roughened hands swept up her thigh, over her hip, up her belly, to her breast, and cupped it in his warm palm. She moaned and arched against his hand, giving him all the freedom he wanted to explore her body. He pulled the shirt over her head and kissed the top of her breast and around to the soft underside. She begged for more with soft whimpers and moans. His tongue circled her hard nipple a second before he took it into his mouth and sucked, sending a warm shiver through her body and straight to her already wet core.

She raked her nails up his back. He growled something low in his throat and gave her other breast equal attention. That wonderfully deft and warm hand ran down her ribs and spread across her stomach, then roamed lower. Her damp panties were no barrier to his questing hand. He slid them down her legs and tossed them away. His fingertips skimmed up her long legs, tracing her sensitive skin. Up, up, until he found her wet center and she moaned with relief as he swept his fingers along her folds. She moved against his hand. He smoothed two fingers over her slick opening and drove them in deep, filling her and sending another wave of pleasure through her body.

It had been so long since she’d felt this good, since a man held her close and made her body come alive.

She sighed and tilted her hips to meet the thrust of his fingers.

“I love it that you show me how much you like that.” His words rumbled at her ear a second before he licked the lobe, then planted an open-mouthed kiss on her neck.

“More.” She rocked her hips into his plundering fingers.

The pad of his thumb rubbed softly over the sweet spot that made her body tighten and pleasure soar. She hit the crest and flew over it, calling his name. Lost in the pleasure of it all, she dug her nails into his shoulders. She buried her face in his neck and rode out the aftershocks, feeling connected to him in a whole new way.

Swept up in the moment and sheer desire, she pushed his shoulders, sending him to his back beside her, and covered him with her body. His hands ran from her backside to her shoulders and down again. She kissed him deeply and moved down to his throat and his bare chest. Her hands moved over the hard muscles of his biceps and up to his shoulders. Her mouth roamed down his chest to his hard stomach. She grabbed the waistband of his pajama bottoms, sat up, and pulled them out of her way. His erection stood proud, and although she hadn’t been with a man in a very long time, she ached to have him inside her.

His hands clamped onto her hips. “Sarah.”

She leaned down and kissed him. Desperate for him, she sank down on his hard cock and filled herself with him and every bit of pleasure he’d promised.

Circling her hips and making him moan this time, she rose and fell on his hard shaft and he thrust to meet her again and again.

Luke hooked his arm around her hips, rolled them over, and settled his big body between her thighs. Still joined, he thrust deep and stared into her eyes as his hard length pumped in and out of her tightening core.

She pulled her knees back, taking him in deeper and loving the moan that slipped through his soft lips and the heavy-lidded stare he gave her.

“You drive me crazy.”

She rocked her hips against his and smiled up at him. “I know.”

He dove in for another searing kiss. She wrapped her legs around his waist and held him close. The tempo changed with a surge of need. She gripped his shoulders and held him to her as he thrust hard and fast. Her back arched and her heavy breasts pressed against his chest. She rocketed over the edge and his body shuddered with his powerful release.

With Luke collapsed on top of her, his warm body pressed to hers, she found a kind of peace she’d never felt in her life.

She felt safe and wanted and necessary.

Luke pressed his face into her neck and kissed her softly, then pressed up on his hands and stared down at her. “God, you’re beautiful.”

She reached up and cupped his face in her hands. “And you’re gorgeous.”

He gave her another soft kiss, then settled on his back beside her, drawing her close to his side. She cuddled into his chest and rested her head under his chin, her hand over his heart.

Luke kissed the top of her head. “I’ll never break a promise to you, Sarah, because I don’t want to ever lose you or this.”

She didn’t put a lot of stock in other people’s promises. They broke them all the time.

But she believed Luke.

And that scared her because he could really break her heart. But it also gave her hope for a future unlike anything she’d ever really given herself the freedom to imagine was possible.