How It Will Be by T. S. Joyce

Chapter Twelve

 

The soft rattle of her phone dragged her from a good dream. She’d been flying over a snowscape with Bron one second, and then pulled into reality with that little vibration.

She pried her eyes open and blinked hard. The room was dark except for the glow of the screen. It wasn’t abnormal to get these in the middle of the night when she was working. She’d responded to a lot of questions earlier about the Bane brother rumors, so it was probably just one of them asking more questions. Outside, dawn hadn’t broken yet. What time was it?

Carefully, Ren propped up on her elbow and looked over her shoulder at Bron. He was sleeping soundly, his arm draped over her hip. His handsome face was completely relaxed. The sudden urge to stroke the short scruff on his jaw nearly overwhelmed her. She liked touching him. It might wake him though, so she resisted the instinct.

Ren loved that he slept so deeply around her. It took a great deal of trust for a War Bird to let his body go soundly unconscious like this around another person.

He felt safe with her, just like she felt safe with him.

The phone went dark on the nightstand, casting them in darkness again and stealing her view of Bron’s face.

Slowly, so as not to jostle him, she reached over and picked up the phone to check the time, but the numbers on the clock weren’t what froze her breath in her chest. It was the name on the caller ID that had sent the text that yanked that sensation of safety right away from her.

I know where you are.

Manning.

A video came through, and she turned down the volume and pressed play on it. The video was seven seconds long, and for the full seven seconds, it was just video of the sky, cluttered with flying crows.

You chose wrong, but you can fix this.

The fine hairs all over her body were standing straight up. She tried to guess at the number of crows in the video. It had to be in the hundreds.

Gently, Ren lifted Bron’s arm off her hip and slipped out of bed, padded into the living room and perched on the edge of the couch. She huffed out a steadying breath before she opened the text thread again.

What do you want? Send.

You know what I want, he responded.

Ren wrapped her hand around the amulet that hung from her neck. Let Trina go and you can have it back.

You’re not in the position to negotiate. They’re coming for you. They’re coming for all of you. Besides, Trina’s gone. And now the amulet isn’t all I want. You’ll take her place.

The fuck I will. I would rather die. Send.

And you’ll get your wish, but it’s not just you it will affect. You will watch your friends die too. You will say yes to me, because doing so is the only thing in the world that can save your little friends. I’m general of the War Birds, appointed by the council. The only one who can stop them from engaging in war with Krome’s crippled Murder is me. And you have something that I want badly enough to consider putting a stop to all of this.

A dagger. It felt like Manning had slid a dagger into her heart, hooked a chain to her soul and was dragging her toward him.

Bron.

They’ll kill every last one of them, Manning texted. Seven Murders are gathering to fight.

It wasn’t fair. She gripped the amulet harder. It wasn’t fair! She’d just found happiness. But what good was a moment of happiness if it ended in blood? She thought about her new friends. The bears, their mates. The growing cubs in Gwen’s belly. They might have power, but the Crow Blooded had numbers. Her mind searched for hope. Maybe the other shifters would help them, but half had already been cut, and the half that remained still didn’t have loyalty to this Crew. Fuck. An awful vision washed through her mind of Bron falling from the sky. Of his eyes glazed over, staring at a sky he would never stretch his wings in again, and it felt like too much. The cost was too great. This. This was why she’d tried to stay unattached, because here was the thing about her.

Ren was just as loyal as Bron. She was built like him, she’d just been smarter after Laken burned her. She’d kept her heart closed…until now.

She would do anything to keep him safe, because if Bron and the safe haven he’d created didn’t exist in this world, what was the point of her existing?

Ren? Manning texted.

Bron would be so disappointed in her for running. He would be confused.

Ren.

She’d just found him again. Just understood everything. Fate had led her here just to strip her joy away again?

Not fair.

Not fair at all.

Ren, you took my amulet. You accepted it. You’re mine. By right I can kill anyone you’re with. Put a stop to this and come home. Save them and take your place where you belong.

Where she belonged. Ren closed her eyes tightly. Don’t cry, don’t cry. Don’t let him have that kind of power.

She was going to stop it. Ren eased her eyes open, and her gaze landed on the marble she’d left in the center groove of the coffee table. She was going to slow the war by doing as Manning said, but she wasn’t really bowing down. She was an injured animal he’d cornered, and she would bide her time. She didn’t know how she would do it, but she would stop the War Birds, and someday, someway make it back here to Bron. To the woods she’d helped purchase with her suffering.

Someday she would come back and put her roots down with the man she loved, and she did love Bron. That thought would get her through what she was about to have to do. The thought that this wasn’t the end for her. It was just an obstacle she had to endure to save the man who had her heart.

Her face went slack, and she made her way to the notepad on the counter by the fridge. He couldn’t come after her. Not until she was sure he was safe.

Numbness washed through her as she scribbled a note. Her stomach clenched as she wrote out the lie.

She set it on the coffee table, grabbed the marble he’d given her to invite her into the Murder, and hoped he could forgive her. She would keep this in her pocket as a reminder of what she was fighting for.

And then Ren grabbed her backpack of clothes, and her purse as quietly as she could, then padded silently to the door. She hesitated there. She could hear him breathing, steady and strong. Deep in sleep. She’d felt joy in this home, and it was worth protecting.

She slipped outside and made her way to the car, careful not to jangle her keys. She was parked far enough away that maybe he wouldn’t hear her start it. Is this what a heart felt like when it broke? Is this what freedom felt like when it was taken? Is this what a soul felt like when it was strangled and shoved into a mold that was too small and shaped differently?

Her chest ached.

“You can’t do this,” a soft voice said in the dark.

She gasped and stuttered to a stop as she saw Nuke leaning against her car.

“Wh-what are you doing here?” she whispered, casting a quick glance to the house to make sure Bron’s light wasn’t turning on.

He gestured upward with a careless finger and then scratched his beard. “Watchin’ the sky.”

Huh. Okaaay. “I’m just…”

“I don’t give a shit about your reasons. You’re not supposed to leave him. Women have a mighty big power to destroy the good men they leave behind. I think Bron’s good.” His eyes glowed like an animal’s, reflecting the moonlight strangely.

Curiosity got to her. “How do you know about stuff like that?”

“Because back when I was good, a woman destroyed me, too. I’d hate to see it happen to a trying man. Oh, he can fight like a motherfucker. But I think he’s driven by good intentions. Him and Krome both. ‘S why I’m here.”

“Why you came to pledge?”

“No. I didn’t know them from Adam before today. They could’ve been shitty, just like the other Crow Blooded. What I mean is…it’s why I’m here watchin’ out for them.”

He was a protector. She wondered what his animal was. Maybe because he was protective, he would understand. “I can save him if I leave. I can save all of you.”

Nuke nodded and poked out his bottom lip thoughtfully as he cast another look up to the sky. “What makes you think we can’t save ourselves?”

But Nuke didn’t understand. He was an outsider, a lone shifter, and he didn’t fully comprehend the hatred her people had for the bears. That was a rage that had been built on generations of war. He didn’t know the numbers that were gathering, or the destruction the allied Murders could cause. And he sure didn’t realize how easy it would be for her to stop the hell that was coming for these woods and the people who would defend them.

The only cost would be her.

And who was she? She was just one insignificant Crow Blooded, and these people were doing something special. They were breaking down barriers and making a Crew like none other. They were doing something important.

“Take care of him, won’t you?” she asked.

He melted back into the shadows, and disappeared completely before she heard his soft and snarly murmur on the wind. “You’re doing this wrong.”

Stupid Nuke thinking he knew everything about everything. Well, he didn’t. She understood the underbelly of her people. The dark side of the Murders. She’d seen it all, and she didn’t want that shit touching this place. Laken had already tainted the old Murder. They’d been through enough.

Nuke didn’t know if she was right or wrong.

He didn’t know anything at all.

He could thank her later when he was still fuckin’ breathing.