Misted (Team Zero #5) by Rina Kent

Since then, I’ve been obsessed about checking out his tattoos. I can make out a few tendrils and black feathers peeking from the collar of his clothes, but that’s it.

I clutch the corner of his T-shirt and attempt to lift it. I’ve been so grabby around him lately, but I can’t help it. I also can’t help having dreams about kissing him.

Hawk shoves me back so hard, my back hits the wall.

“Fuck.” He checks me up and down, gaze concerned. “You all right? I told you not to touch me out of nowhere.”

I bite down a wince. “I’m strong, too, you know.”

He smiles. It’s small and barely reaches his deep blue eyes, but in The Pit, it’s the only thing that sustains that foolish hope about an escape.

“I just wanna see.” I reach for his T-shirt again. “Just a peek, okay?”

He twists away and I grab air.

“Fine!” I huff. “I’ll get my own tattoo.” Or not. Those needles scare the bejesus out of me.

“You will not.”

“Since you won’t let me see yours, I’ll tell Ink to tattoo me in a place you can’t see either.”

Hawk’s jaw clenches and he growls low in his throat. “You will not let Ink touch you.”

“Why not?”

“You will not and that’s it.”

He sure is in a talkative mood now.

“Then show me.”

“I will when it’s ready,” he grumbles in that dismissive tone.

I watch him closely, like really watch him. How his T-shirt sticks to his developing muscles. How his brown hair became a shade lighter and his skin tanner due to the training we’ve had in the sun. How the ocean in his eyes invites me for a dive. And then… that mouth.

It’s impossible to look away — and it’s not from lack of trying. I swallow the urge to glue myself to him until no space remains between us. But if Hawk sent me against the wall for touching him, he’ll punch me a planet away if I kiss him.

The question is whether or not I’m ready for that.

“You were screaming the other day,” he says in a quiet tone, glancing at me.

Last week when I was exhausted and kind of slept on his lap, Hawk kept shaking me. Many of the other children sleep and never wake up after an increase in Omega’s dose.

Thankfully, I didn’t. The fifteen Zeroes who remained are off danger.

For now.

“It was a nightmare.” I inch closer and flex my fingers near his hand on the ground. “I think it was true, though.”

Hawk faces me and doesn’t take away his hand. It’s his way to urge me to talk.

I thought I forgot all about my real life before The Pit, but the memory from that nightmare proved me wrong. Talking to Hawk about it, though… I peek at him through my lashes, and he’s watching me expectantly.

It’s impossible to hide from him when he seems to be fishing into my soul.

My pinkie touches the back of his hand, needing the comfort his touch provides. “I think my dad died or something because Mum had a boyfriend who lived with us. He was as obnoxious as they could get and…”

Hawk brows draw together. “And?”

“He touched my chest beneath my clothes.” I swallow as the memories pour in like a blurry old film. “I was young, maybe seven? I didn’t understand it at the time, but my instinct told me it was wrong even when he said it was okay. When Mum came in, she sided with him and told me to stop wearing shorts and short sleeves. I was so confused and scared, but I did as Mum instructed. Then he did it again and again, he always tried to… touch me.”

I gulp the ball in my throat. My breathing constricts and my heart pounds against my ribcage as if I’m coming down from a chase.

“Did he…?” Hawk’s voice is quiet but rage simmers beneath.

“No. I always locked my door and my window and everything. One day, he cornered me in the kitchen late at night and tried to remove my shorts. I hit him with a pan. Mum blamed me again and said I only complicate her life. She told me she’ll throw me away like my rubbish father abandoned us if I don’t behave. I ran away from home that day and never looked back.”

Tears are streaming down my cheeks without me realising it. Every word comes out as a choked whisper as if I’m summoning the ability to speak. “I stayed in the area, hoping she’d try to find me, but…” I sob. “She didn’t even file a missing person report. It’s as if she was glad to finally get rid of me.”

Hawk’s strong hand curls around mine and he squeezes. I collapse against his shoulder, holding onto his bicep with my other hand as I draw stuttering breaths. I’m sure I’ll forget all about those snippets of my childhood with my next Omega fix, and each time, they keep disappearing more and more.

But at this moment, they just hurt. It’s like having a constant, crushing weight sitting on my chest. I ended up in this place because my mother didn’t care and I can’t even blame her since her face is a blur.

My head rests against Hawk’s shoulder for what seems like an hour. When I pull away, his free fist clench and unclench. I squeeze his hand in mine, but he swiftly pulls it and inches away, putting distance between us.

“Why are you always doing that?” I scowl and wipe the moisture from my cheeks with the back of my hand. “If you don’t want me to sit with you, then I’ll just go stay with Ink.”