Misted (Team Zero #5) by Rina Kent

“Then I’ll kill him all over again.” For fucking real this time.

“What if…” She trails off then clamps her lips shut.

I throw a questioning glance towards her.

“Nothing.” She goes back to staring at the wires.

I’m tempted to shake her for whatever she wanted to say, but I keep the safe silence instead.

We continue working in silence. Mine is normal — I’ve never been a talker — but hers isn’t. She stopped being a talkative freak over the years and has become guarded, heartless and an ice queen as they call her in Le Salon. The girl who said anything on her mind is long gone.

“Why are you using your right hand? You even keep…” She trails off and her head snaps my way. “Did you lose full control of your left hand?”

My jaw clenches. I’ve been out for months and she’s the only one who noticed it. Let’s hope I hadn’t been too careless to show it to anyone who can use it against me.

She might use it against you. She shot you in the back, remember?

I continue cutting the wires fast.

“Hawk?” Her voice lingers on the verge of panic. “It’s Hades, isn’t it? This happened during the torture.”

If she already knows the answer, why ask?

She yanks me by the arm, forcing me to face her. “It’s your damn dominant hand!”

“I fucking know that.” I snap.

“Then why aren’t you doing anything about it?”

“Whatever I do about it is none of your business. You’re probably enjoying it.”

She raises her hand and slaps me. Hard. My jaw tightens.

“I watched you!” she cries, her bottom lip trembling. “Hades sent us videos regularly to motivate us. I watched every second of the torture. I watched you go out of your mind because of withdrawal. If you think I enjoyed any second of that, then fuck you, Hawk.” She punches me in the chest and shoves me away. “Fuck. You.”

I didn’t know Hades sent them videos. How come neither Flame nor Scar mentioned she was watching me?

But again, I never asked.





21





Mist





All this time, I thought I lost you, but maybe I lost myself, too.



A week passes and I sit on the edge of myself.

As if the withdrawal isn’t enough, Hawk doesn’t leave my side. Whenever he suspects I’m getting stronger, he ties me back to the bed, so I’m splayed for his hungry gaze.

I try to ignore the anticipation coiling through me.

I try to pretend that his touch isn’t resurrecting my dead soul back to life.

But no matter how much I lie to myself, the feeling continue to twist inside me like a hungry predator.

However, aside from the teasing orgasms and the occasional spankings, Hawk never took me after that day at the table.

It can’t be because he doesn’t want me. I feel his desire right under my skin, almost rivalling mine. Short from begging him to take me, I don’t know what I’ll do.

If I have to be fed by him as he fingers me with his other hand one more time, I might just break down and beg.

Today, he didn’t bother with tying me up. I can barely stand and even when I do, I’m shaking all over as if I’m coming down with a cold.

Since he didn’t come to find me, I stroll down the stairs, clutching the wall for balance. My hair falls to the middle of my back, all brushed and pretty thanks to Hawk. Yesterday, after my shower, he dried my hair and I fell asleep while he brushed it. Maybe that’s why I didn’t tie it today.

I’m wearing yet another one of his T-shirts that almost reaches my knees. I’ve become so accustomed to his clean, head-turning ocean scent that I don’t want to wear anything but his clothes anymore.

Once I’m in the entrance area, I search for a phone or something but come up with nothing.

After I threatened him to sneak out and call for help behind his back, Hawk let me call Molly while he was present. She assured me that Jessica and Sarah are in a safe house and that she visits them. I told her to keep them away from any of her male contacts. They’re a little traumatised after the incident with that politician and they don’t need any male presence.

I can trust Molly to keep them safe and watch over the other girls in Le Salon. However, I couldn’t broach Ink’s subject with her. Not only Hawk remained at my side like a grim reaper the entire time, but I also don’t doubt that someone is eavesdropping on hers.

When I’m strong enough, I’ll find an opening and leave this place or everything I’ve been building will fall apart.

Paracetamol pills lie on the table with a bottle of water. I pop two pills inside my mouth and swallow gulps of water.

This caring side of Hawk always puts me in a knot. Sometimes, I don’t know if he really cares or he’s doing this to torment me. It’s probably the second, but a stupid part of me still hopes that something inside him still beats for me.

Outside, I crouch on a swing on the small, wooden porch. I’m so used to Le Salon’s fake grandiose or the empty hotel rooms that being in such a cosy place squeezes my chest until it’s painful.

The bright, early morning sky contains no ounce of clouds. The ocean’s salty breeze blows my hair across my face as if inviting me for a swim in the twinkling sea. In the distance, I spot a large frame running along the beach. Although I’m a bit dizzy, I plop my elbows on my thighs and lean forward to get a better view of him.