The Revenge You Seek by Tracy Lorraine

4

Letty

Everything feels different when I wake the next morning. I feel lighter, the tightness in my chest that I’ve become all too used to has lessened.

The guys took me to a bar and grill off campus and we spent the evening laughing and eating. It was the most normal night I’ve had in a very long time.

Every time one of them made me laugh, I felt the stress and loss of my past begin to melt away. It was such a freeing feeling after drowning under the weight for such a long time.

Flicking my bedside light on, I look around my room. It’s not unlike my dorm room at Columbia and that’s kinda comforting. The walls are an off-white with dirty marks where the previous occupant must have had posters up. As well as the twin bed I’m curled up in, there’s a single closet, a chest of drawers and a desk. Plus, and I’ve no idea how Mom managed to secure it at the last minute, a private bathroom.

I curl back up and think of how incredible yesterday was. From bumping into Luca and Leon, my classes, my roommates and the possibility of actually being happy here.

I can’t wipe the smile off my face as I finally throw my sheets off and plod through to my bathroom. The tiled floor is like ice against my bare feet and I hop around as I brush my teeth and wait for the shower to warm up.

The second I’m ready, I don’t hesitate in pulling open my door and joining whoever is already crashing around in the kitchen for breakfast. The scent of frying bacon is too much to resist.

“Good morning,” Violet sings from her spot by the stove.

“Morning.”

“I hope you’re hungry.” My stomach rumbles right on cue.

“You have no idea.”

Panic flickers inside me as I look down at myself but I quickly talk myself down because there’s no way anyone here would know that I’m two dress sizes down on what I’ve always been, thanks to the stress of the past year.

“Grab yourself a coffee and it’ll be ready in a few.”

“I can help,” I offer, heading for the coffee machine.

“We have a food rota. You’re tomorrow and Friday. The guys luck out during the season, but we’ll ensure they make up for it once it’s over.”

“You’re assuming I can cook.”

“You don’t have to cook. Buy a box of cereal if you like, order something. You’re just in charge of those days.”

I smile at her, loving how the six of them work like a well-oiled machine. If I’d have known about this before I moved in, I might have been intimidated about joining them, but they’ve welcomed me as if I’ve always been here and I couldn’t be more grateful.

They're the family I didn't know I needed and it's only day two.

I'm sipping on my coffee when Ella and Micah join us and Violet begins plating up.

"Still here then?" Micah jokes.

"Yeah, you didn't all put me off too badly last night."

"And here I thought West and Brax's jokes might have been the end of you."

I laugh, recalling some of their worst pickup lines last night. "They're harmless."

"There are a few broken hearts walking around campus who probably wouldn't agree with you."

I roll my eyes. "Football players. I know all about them." I think of Luca and his ways with women over the few years I've known him.

"Oh, so…" Ella pipes up. "You never actually explained how you know them," she digs.

"You need to get over yourself. They don't want you," Violet groans as she sits down with us to eat. "She's been chasing them around like a lost puppy for two years. It's becoming pathetic."

"I haven’t chased anyone. And…" she points out, poking her knife in Violet's direction. "As you well know, I was with Sawyer for most of freshman year."

"Ugh," Micah complains. "We know. No need to remind us."

I watch as the three of them bicker like siblings and I realize why the vibe in this dorm works so well, they really are a little family.

"So, the twins," Ella prompts once again, ignoring the others and their attempt at a topic change.

"I moved to Rosewood when I was sixteen. Luca was my lab partner in my first week and we just hit it off. The rest is history."

"You slept with them?" she asks, leaning forward on her elbows and soaking up my every word.

"Err…"

"Oh my God, you have. Tell me they tag teamed you, please." The excitement in her eyes is amusing as hell and I realize that I'm going to have to introduce her to them for the comedy value alone. She'll lose her shit.

"No, I haven’t been in a Dunn sandwich, so I can't feed your fantasy, sorry."

"Ugh, what kind of use are you?" she sulks.

"I'll introduce you next time we see them."

"Yesss," she hisses. "Oh, maybe I shouldn't eat this. If this happens today I don't want to be all bloated and gross."

We all stare at her. "For real?" Violet asks, her brows raised.

She's got a point, Ella's got a banging body and the most insane curves. Any guy would be lucky to get their hands on her.

"Just eat the damn bacon, El. No guy wants a skinny bitch anyway."

None of them look my way, and I know that the comment isn’t in any way directed at me, but still, I feel myself retreat a little. I hate how I look right now. I hate that when I look in the mirror, my ribs and hip bones are so visible. I miss my curves, my breasts, my ass.

Silently, I cut into my breakfast and pop each bite into my mouth but I don't taste any of it. Thoughts of my body take me back there and I'll do anything to keep my head in the present.

"So what do you say, Letty? You in?"

"Uh…"

All three of them are staring at me but I have zero clue as to what they're talking about.

"Party Friday night. You in?"

Dread sits heavy in my stomach at the mention of a party. I should say no. I should make an excuse about the amount of work I have to do and hide in my room.

But as I look between them and the hope in their eyes, I realize that I can't be that scared little girl anymore. I'm here and it seems like I might have already landed some incredible friends. I need to embrace it.

"It's a football party at the Dunn's place," Ella adds. "They'll probably invite you anyway."

"Oh, um…" The thought of Luca and Leon being there makes me feel better and I quickly find myself agreeing.

"Sweet. We'll get ready here, head over fashionably late, hopefully, catch some eyes." Ella wiggles her brows.

"Girl, the twins don’t want you," Micah spits, sounding totally exasperated by her.

"I wasn't talking about them. I'll take any athlete. I'm not choosy."

"We know. We have to listen to you, remember."

"Aw, Micey." She pouts while his face hardens at the awful nickname. "You're just jealous because you haven’t gotten laid in…" She starts counting on her fingers as if she has actually worked it out.

"Fuck off, El." He pushes his thick-rimmed glasses up his nose and stands with his empty plate in hand. He turns his dark eyes on me. "Sorry, Let. I hope you have a good day."

He damn near throws his plate in the sink, drills a hate stare at Ella and storms from the room.

Interesting.

"Girl, do you have to push his buttons?" Violet snaps at Ella who just shrugs innocently.

"Not my problem that he can't get over his ex."

"He's over her and you know it. Cheating bitch doesn't deserve any more of his thoughts."

"Amen to that. Chloe was a bitch with a capital b."

"You finished?" Violet asks me, glancing at my empty plate.

"Yes. Thank you, it was delicious. Feeling the pressure for tomorrow."

"It's not a test, Let. Just make sure there's something to eat and we're all good. Ah, here come the boys. Get that pan on the go, Vi."

The booming sounds of West and Brax's voice filter down to us a few seconds before they come bounding through the door.

They're both freshly showered by looking at their hair. They throw their duffels in the direction of their bedrooms and simultaneously pull out a chair each and sit down.

"Where’s the food, Vi? Two starving athletes here."

"You're back early," Ella mutters. "You might even get to class on time today."

"Session was cut short. New guy turned up and caused havoc." West waves it off as nothing as the sizzling of bacon fills the room once more.

"I'm just gonna get sorted," I say, pointing to my room and then quickly head that way to gather my books ready for class.

I'm not really interested in the football drama. I did my best to stay away from it all in high school—which was easier said than done when my best friend was the freaking captain and best quarterback in the state.

I roll my eyes at his undying love for the game and pack everything up. If there's one thing I intend to do during my time here, it's to stay as far away from football, hell any athletes, aside from those who are already my friends—or quickly turning into my friends. Nothing good comes from football players.

"You heading in?" Ella asks me when I meet her out in the living area also with her bag over her shoulder ready to get to class.

"Yep. Sociology, you?"

"Marketing. I'm in the next building to you so I'll walk you."

"Let's do it."

She links her arm through mine and together we leave the others behind.

"Just so you know, I'm not some sex-starved whore," she says a little too seriously as we make our way across the quad.

"I didn't think that," I say lightly. "I know they were just ribbing you."

"I'll admit, I've had my fair share of less than memorable relationships and one-night stands. They seem to forget that they're the same. Well, apart from Micah, he's quieter than the rest of us.”

"He's got the nerd look down."

"Yeah, girls at MKU generally pine after the athletes."

"You say that like it's different at any other college. Columbia was exactly the same."

"I blame books."

I snort a laugh. "How so?"

"You know, all those hot romances make the guys out to be players and whatever but then there's that one who takes one look at you and forgets everyone else and you get to run off with him while he earns a shit ton in the NFL or NBA or whatever." She sighs dreamily.

"That what you want?"

"No, not really." She laughs. "I want a career. But we can all dream, right?"

"Sure can." I think back to my own obsession with Luca over the years and I totally understand the fascination.

Ella opens the door for me when we get to the building I apparently need and I step through.

"I think your cell is buzzing," she says, quickly catching up with me.

"Oh."

Swinging my purse around, I dig through it as we head up to the second floor.

"Is that Mary Poppins’ purse or something?" she mutters when she looks over to find me still searching.

"Ah-ha," I exclaim as I pull it out.

"Jesus, someone wants you," she mutters, staring down at the screen as I do.

Seventeen missed calls from Zayn.

My heart drops into my feet as I think about what that many missed calls could mean.

Mom, Dad, Harley… fuck.

My hand is trembling as I attempt to call him back. I can barely breathe through my panic as I wait for the call to connect.

If something has happened to them, I'm not sure I'm going to cope. Not after…

The call rings twice before he answers.

"What's wrong? Is everyone okay?" I rush out, my voice cracking with emotion.

Ella's concerned stare burns into the side of my head but I keep my eyes trained on a spot on the wall down the hall in the hope the nothingness might somehow calm me.

"What? Yeah, everyone's okay," he says, sounding a little regretful about sending me into a meltdown.

"Thank fuck. Don't ever do that to me again, okay?"

"Shit, I'm sorry. I didn't mean… it doesn't matter. Um… you might want to sit down for this."

The panic that had started to subside returns full force.

"Zayn?"

"Okay, um… I'm not sure how to… fuck…"

"Just spit it out."

"Okay, so a new player showed up at our session this morning and—"

His voice fades into oblivion as a person walking up the hallway I'm staring down catches my attention.

My heart slams against my ribs and my head begins to spin.

No. No, it can't be.

No.

Our eyes connect and it's like someone's just hit me with a fucking truck.

This cannot be happening to me.

No.

No.

"No," I cry, although my voice doesn't sound like my own.

My cell slips from my hand. I can vaguely hear Zayn shouting down the line as I wrap my arms around my middle and stumble back, needing to put as much distance between us as possible.

"Letty?" A soft voice hits my ears and I remember that Ella is with me but all I can see is him.

Kane Legend.

Walking down the hallway as if he's about to attend my sociology class.

No. No. No.

When my eyes focus again, I find him standing stock-still outside the door and staring at me as if I can't possibly be real.

God, please let this be a dream—or a fucking nightmare.

Hate crackles between us as we just stare at each other as if we're not really there.

I guess at least I know he didn't plan this.

He's as shocked as I am.

His lips part and for a second, I think he's actually going to say something but at the last minute, he closes them again and swiftly disappears into the auditorium.

I release the breath I had no idea I was holding and my legs give out.

I slide down the wall until my ass hits the floor and I wrap my arms around my knees.

"What the hell was that?" Ella asks, dropping down to her haunches beside me and placing her warm hand on my shoulder.

"T-that… that was my worst nightmare."

"Uh… o-okay." She looks to the door where Kane vanished and then back to me. "Do you want to go back to the dorms?"

I'm about to say yes and I'm almost climbing from the floor in my need to escape but at the last minute, I stop myself.

"No. I need to go to class."

"But—"

I push up from the floor and brush myself off.

I refuse to be the girl I've been for the last year. If I'm her, then he'll crush me without even trying.

I need to find the girl who stood up against him the night of that party. The night that tilted my world on its axis.

I blow out a breath and reach down for my cell, looking it over, grateful that I didn’t crack the screen, and then grab my purse.

I take a step toward my class but Ella's hand on my arm stops me.

"A-are you sure this is a good idea?"

No, it's probably not. "Yes, it'll be fine." I refuse to stop my life for a moment longer because of him. He's already taken enough from me. That has to stop now.

After tapping out a quick message to Zayn, I square my shoulders and hold my head high as the professor slips into the room.

Perfect timing.

"I can come?"

"No, you have a marketing class. I'll be fine."

She hesitates, not wanting to leave me.

I understand. If I'd just witnessed her react like that to merely seeing someone, I'd be concerned too.

"Unlock this," she says, lifting my cell up.

I do as she says and she takes it from me, quickly tapping out her number.

"If you need me… anything. Call me. I'll be right here."

"Thank you," I whisper. "I-I should go. I don't want to miss anything."

"Okay."

She doesn't leave, instead just watches me walk into my class.

The seats are almost full as I scan my eyes around the room, hoping like hell my eyes don’t find him.

Spotting an empty seat about halfway back, I hitch my purse up higher and make my way there as the professor begins introducing himself and what today's class will entail.

I can't have taken more than ten steps before a tingle of awareness races down my spine.

He's watching me.

As discreetly as I can, I look around the room trying to find him, but I'm unsuccessful. All I find are eager students listening to whatever is being said at the front of the class.

My blood is still whooshing in my ears long after I sit down and get my books out. I try my best to focus and get my head around what this semester has in store for me in this class but all I can see are his blue eyes as he stared at me in the hallway.

He looked exactly as he did that night. Like he left and wasn't affected by what happened between us.

Why should he? It's not like we saw each other or even spoke after that night.

The second he heard the sirens in the distance, he bolted, leaving me there in the dark forest, damn near glued into that muddy puddle he'd fucked me in.

I was a mess. If only I knew that it was a sign of what was to come, it might not have felt so bad.

Hindsight is a great thing because if I had known what was going down in Skye's house then I might have swallowed down my pride and walked back inside to find my sister.

But I didn't. I fixed my dress the best I could, got in my car, and made my way home, confident that Harley would be safe with Kyle and the others. She doesn't need babying, we're all Harrow Creek kids and we know how to look after ourselves.

But if I had known…

I try to swallow down the messy ball of emotion that clogs my throat.

I have so many regrets from that night. There are so many things that shouldn't have happened and what went down between Kane and me was only one of them.

Harley ended up in the hospital being questioned by police and Kyle ended up in juvie.

No doubt he blames all of that on me along with the already very long line of crimes he thinks I'm guilty of.

I let out a shaky sigh as images from my past play out in my head like a freaking movie.

It's two hours later when our professor brings the class to a close after explaining our first assignment but I haven’t heard a word of it. I breathe a small sigh of relief when he tells us that notes will be online shortly because I have no clue as to what's happened this morning.

Everyone around me begins packing up their things and making their way toward the exit but I find myself frozen to the spot.

Still, my skin prickles with awareness telling me that he's still here.

Why can't he just leave with everyone else, forget I exist and continue on with his life.

Out of nowhere West and Brax's comment from this morning hits me.

"New guy turned up and caused havoc."

Holy shit, Luca.

He hates Kane almost as much as I do. Something I never discouraged during my time in Rosewood, although I never confessed to the feeling being mutual. I made a point of being busy every time the Bears and the Harriers had a game and I never once mentioned my connection to him aside from us being at school together. Neither of them ever asked either, not that I'd have told them the truth if they had. I'd run away from my high school bully and that was the end of it. I was just glad that the Bears ruined the Harriers every time they played. It made everything feel a little better in my head.

But now… now he's here and if he's on the team.

Fuck.

This is not good.

No.

This is really, really fucking bad.