The Art of Kissing by Jessica Sorensen

Raven

After lettingthe wound bleed for a bit, I bandaged it up then made sure to put both my plaid overshirt and leather jacket on to have extra protection from seeing the bandage on my wrist. I leave my hair down to dry and slip my boots on before heading out of the bathroom.

I can hear the guys’ voices from what sounds like the living room, so I head in that direction with the intent of figuring out what the next step is in this whole moving-in-with-them thing. But then I hear my name and the mention of a Willow. I don’t hear the full sentence, but I am super curious as to who she is and why they’re talking about me in the same sentence as her.

“Who’s Willow?” I ask as I enter the room, combing my fingers through the long, raven black locks of my hair.

They clearly didn’t hear me walking in by the way they all sort of startle. Jax swallows hard as he looks at me while uneasiness flows off Hunter. Zay, though, quickly recovers and puts on an indifferent expression.

“She’s just some chick I fuck sometimes,” he says, watching me with this annoyingly expectant look, as if he thinks I am going to blush at his foul words or something.

I don’t give in. In fact, I don’t even squirm, mostly because his answer confuses me.

“Then, why did you say my name in the same sentence?” I question.

He doesn’t answer right away, so I know he wasn’t expecting that. I get a sense of satisfaction knowing so.

Jax looks uncomfortable, rubbing his hand across his mouth while glancing at Zay.

Hunter looks directly at me, wetting his lips with his tongue. “We should get you to your house so we can get your stuff before it gets too late.”

Subject change much?

I internally sigh. This isn’t the first time I have gotten the impression they were keeping something from me, but since Zay said it has something to do with somebody he fucks, I decide to let it drop.

“I don’t think it’s going to be as easy as me just walking in and packing up my stuff,” I tell him, fiddling with the zipper on my jacket. “Plus, everyone’s at the house right now.” I blow out an exhale. “Maybe it’d be better if I just spent the night tonight, then tomorrow, like at lunchtime, or maybe right after school, I can go over there and get my stuff when it’s just my aunt, because she’ll probably be more than thrilled to get me the hell out of there.” I chew on my thumbnail. “Although, my uncle’s been like really insistent that I have to stay there until I’m eighteen. I’m not sure why.”

“He might get money for it,” Zay says, reclining back in the chair with his arms crossed, his face set in deep thought. “Sometimes, when people become guardians, especially because of a will, they get compensation. Maybe your parents had a will with something like that in it, worried your uncle wouldn’t take care of you unless he got something out of it. And they put that you had to be eighteen before he got it in order to make sure he took care of you until you became an adult.”

I crinkle my nose. “Well, that fucking sucks. He’s never gonna let me move out until I’m eighteen then.” I waver. “My parents didn’t really have a lot of money. I don’t think so, anyway.”

“They could’ve had life insurance policies,” Zay states with his brows creased and his head tilted to the side, deeply pondering something. “If so, we should be able to find it online.”

“Really?” I question. “They put wills online where anyone can see them?”

A smirk curls at his lips. “No. Only the ones who know how to hack into the system can see them.”

“Right. You guys are hackers. I forgot.” I tuck a strand of hair behind my ear.

A beat of silence goes by, and then Hunter starts chuckling while Jax smiles at me like I’m the most amusing thing ever. Even Zay looks like he’s struggling not to laugh.

I squirm self-consciously. “What’s so funny?” I ask, glancing at the three of them.

“Nothing.” Hunter gets his laughter under control, but a smile remains on his face as he gets to his feet and crosses the room toward me. “You’re just adorable, that’s all.”

I make a big show of dramatically rolling my eyes. “No, I’m not.”

The corners of his lips quirk. “You are, though.”

“Are not—”

He places a finger to my lips. “Are, too. Now stop arguing.”

I narrow my eyes at him, but I’m not really pissed off. Honestly, it’s difficult to be pissed off at him.

He seems to find my silence amusing, a smile tugging at his lips. Then he lowers his finger from my lips and full-on grins. “I think I won that one,” he remarks haughtily.

I open my mouth, preparing to hand him his ass with a clever remark, but Zay interrupts.

“I think, if she’s really planning on staying here, she should call whoever she needs to call so we can get that taken care of. Then, Hunter, tomorrow, you can look into the will and see if you can find out exactly what it says. But tonight, I want to focus on figuring out more about this game the families have reinstated and see if we can come up with a game plan for tomorrow, because if all the families really are playing, shit’s going to hit the fan at school.”

Hunter blinks, as if he forgot about the game.

Truthfully, I did, too. Now that he’s brought it up, though …

“What is this game, anyway?” I look from Hunter to Jax then finally at Zay. “I mean, all I know is that, whatever it is, apparently, it meant I had to get tossed off a bridge yesterday, so I’m guessing it’s not a good thing.”

Jax winces at my mention of the bridge then fastens his gaze on me. “Come sit down, and we’ll try to explain it.”

“Yeah, that’s a good idea,” Hunter mumbles, no longer smiling. Then he turns and heads for the sofa, snagging my hand as he does and towing me with him. When he reaches the sofa that Jax is sitting on, he sits down, pulling me with him so that I end up sitting wedged between him and Jax.

The scent of cologne and cigarette smoke touches my nostrils, which makes me wonder which one of them smokes. I know Zay does, but the scent isn’t coming from him.

“I still can’t believe they even reinstated the game,” Hunter says as he reaches for a mug on the coffee table in front us. “It’s been years, and they just decided, hey, let’s do this again, only force our kids to play … It doesn’t make any sense.”

“Doesn’t it?” Zay questions. “This is our parents we’re talking about. They love seeing us suffer. Plus, it’s not like it’s the first time they’ve made us play a game,” he mumbles the last part, his gaze flicking in my direction.

I’m not sure why, but it feels like he’s trying to read me. Why? It’s not like this has anything to do with me. Well, except for the fact that I got forced off a bridge and plunged into freezing cold water because of this game …

Okay, maybe it does have something to do with me.

“What exactly is the point of this game?” I ask, discreetly tugging at the sleeves of my jacket to double-check that the bandage is covered since both Jax and Hunter are sitting close enough that, if it peeked out, they might notice.

“To destroy each other,” Zay says matter-of-factly. “To hurt each other. To win and be the most powerful family in town.”

“Well, that sounds lovely.” My tone oozes sarcasm.

“Yeah, I know,” Hunter mumbles then takes a sip of what looks like coffee, but I can smell the burning scent of whiskey coming from it.

Zay starts bouncing his knee up and down as he dazes off at the floor. “We need to find out who threw Raven off the bridge and retaliate as soon as possible. If we don’t, we’re going to seem weak, and we can’t be in that position if we want to win.”

“You want to win?” I ask, surprised. I mean, from the impression I got, they all seemed to hate the world their families come from. Then again, they have gone out of their way to make sure everyone in school is afraid of them, so they clearly care about their image.

Zay flicks his gaze to me. “While we live here, we have to care. Because the moment we don’t care, shit gets brutal.” He reclines back in the chair. “Things like what happened to you on the bridge will happen more and more frequently. And then, on top of that, we’ll start getting shit from our fathers about tarnishing the family names.” The muscle in his jaw ticks at the mention of their fathers. “Which is why it’s really important to retaliate as soon as possible. But, in order to do so, we have to figure out who pushed you off the bridge.” He looks at me as if expecting me to give him an answer.

“I wish I could help, but I already told you I never saw their faces.”

“But you head their voices, right?” he asks, and I nod. “So, we just need to get you to place a voice to a face.”

“How do we do that exactly?” I ask. “I barely know anyone here.”

“Well, more than likely, tomorrow, we’ll be at school with them, so I’m thinking we start searching around and keep our ears open,” he says, rolling up the sleeves of his shirt. “I know it might be complicated, but it’s important that you figure it out.”

“Yeah …” is all I say, because I don’t know if I can do it. I mean, I can’t even remember much of my past, so how am I supposed to get my mind to link a voice to a face when that kind of stuff clearly isn’t my forte?

Zay’s gaze dissects me. “Unless you don’t want to be part of this.”

“I already kind of am,” I remind him. “And it’s not that.” I chew on my bottom lip. “I just worry I won’t be able to do it. My brain isn’t the greatest when it comes to memories and stuff like that.” I squirm at saying such truthful words aloud, but these guys know nearly as much about my past as I do, so it’s not like I need to tiptoe around it.

“I’m sure you’ll be fine,” Jax speaks up, sliding his arm along the back of the sofa and behind me. “And if you can’t do it, it’s not that big of a deal.”

“Don’t coddle her,” Zay says, irritation ringing in his tone. “It is a huge fucking deal if she doesn’t.”

“And I’m sure putting an immense amount of pressure is going to help her,” Jax snaps back, glaring at Zay.

“Jesus, what the hell is happening right now?” Hunter mumbles under his breath as he glances at his two friends.

I’m not certain what’s shocking him, but it’s clearly something.

“Maybe she needs that,” Zay tells him, crossing his arms.

As Zay and Jax continue to argue with each other, Hunter takes a sip of his whiskey then moves to set the cup down, but I grab it from his hand. While alcohol isn’t my first choice, it does have a slightly similar effect as taking a couple of hits.

Hunter slides his gaze to mine, the corners of his lips quirking. “Are you thirsty, sweetheart? There’s water and soda and stuff in the fridge.”

Smirking at him, I lift the cup to my lips and take a sip. Just as I guessed, the burning taste of whiskey fills my mouth. I swallow it down then take another sip before handing it back to him.

Curiosity glitters in his eyes as he takes the cup from me. “How’d you know?”

“I could smell it the second you picked it up,” I tell him with a shrug.

“So, you’re a whiskey drinking girl, then?” he questions, amusement glittering in his pretty eyes.

“Not really,” I say. “Usually, I’m high-as-a-motherfucking-kite sort of girl, but the water ruined what I had on me and I left the rest of my stash at home.”

He sets the cup down on the table. “Well, just to clarify, I’m not normally a whiskey drinking sort of guy either, but it’s all I can do for now.”

“What do you normally do?” I wonder.

He presses his lips together and gives me this look that makes me kind of wish I didn’t ask.

“Whatever. Can we just get on with this?” Jax grumbles, cutting through the moment. Thank God, because I’m pretty sure whatever Hunter was about to say had to do with sex. And, while it doesn’t completely bother me to talk about sex, Hunter isn’t the sort of guy to hold back.

I turn away from Hunter and look at Jax. “I really am fine with trying to do this,” I tell him, since he seems so worried about it. “I just really hope my mind finally works right for once.”

His expression softens. “I’m sure you’ll be fine.” He brushes his fingers through my hair. “I just want to make sure that you don’t let Zay pressure you.” He tosses a dirty look at Zay.

“And it’s already starting,” Zay mumbles, shaking his head. “I knew it would.”

“You know nothing.” Jax throws a scowl at him, but by the time he looks at me, his expression is softening.

“I can help you, if you want. I mean, I heard one of the guys who was part of it when they called me. Maybe tomorrow morning, we can wander around the school together and see if we can make some sort of connection.”

“Right. I forgot you heard them, too.” A bit of relief trickles through me. I’m not alone.

I’m not alone?

That can’t be real, right?

“Yeah, let’s do it,” I say with a bit more confidence than I had before.

He smiles at me, and it’s such a warm smile, a comforting smile.

Suddenly, my stomach is doing this weird butterfly thing. It’s so out of nowhere that I miss a breath and end up exhaling shakily.

Jax furrows his brows. Then he leans in and asks softly, “Are you okay?”

I give a shaky nod. I don’t even know what the hell my problem is. So what if he smiled at me warmly? It’s not a big deal.

Stop making such a big deal out it, Raven.

Jax looks unconvinced but lets it drop, twisting around to face Zay, although he keeps his arm along the back of the sofa right behind me.

“We’re all good with the plan, then?” Zay double-checks with a hint of annoyance in his tone.

I nod while Jax just shrugs. “I guess. I’m still a little nervous about all this, though. I mean, they fucking took her in broad daylight. Clearly, they think we’re weak—whoever did this—and that leaves a hell of a lot of possibilities of what they might try next.”

“I’m going to second that.” Hunter brings the brim of his cup to his lips. “We need to be on guard tomorrow … Keep an eye on each other closely.”

The way everyone’s gaze strays toward me makes me wonder if by everybody, he means me.

“I know it doesn’t seem like it,” I feel the need to say, “but I am tough. I was just too outnumbered and caught totally caught off guard. I’ve been in my fair share of fights and I can hold my own. My dad, he taught me how to fight at a young age, so …” I shrug, my stomach tightening a bit at the mention of my father.

“No one’s doubting your toughness, pretty Raven,” Hunter assures me. “We just want to make sure you’re safe, especially since we’re the ones who brought you into this mess.” He gives a short pause. “And I swear I’m not bringing this up because I think you’re weak, but maybe it would be beneficial for Zay to start training you to fight. I mean, if your dad taught you some stuff already, then he could just add to that knowledge.”

I flit my gaze to Zay, who’s staring at me with a frown on his face and his arms crossed. Out of all the guys, I’m not surprised he’s the fighter of them, with his broodiness and everything. It’s not even that. He’s more muscular than Jax and Hunter, and he has scars on his face and knuckles that resemble battle wounds. I would know since my dad had some of his own. However … “I like the idea and everything,” I say, looking back at Hunter, “but maybe it’s better if someone else taught me.”

“You afraid me?” Zay asks with a challenge in his tone.

I snort a laugh as I look back at him. “Not at all. I’d just rather not be trained to fight by someone who I’m pretty sure doesn’t care if I get beat up.”

He makes a big show of rolling his eyes. “Why the hell would I not train you properly? If we get into a fight with another group, I don’t want to have to worry about you.”

“Gee, thanks,” I say dryly. “Whatever. I don’t mind polishing up my already awesome fighting skills.” I smirk haughtily.

He just stares at me, unimpressed.

Hunter chuckles under his breath, while Jax cracks a smile.

“You know what I think?” Hunter starts when the sound of thunder booming from outside cuts him off. It’s followed by another and another. Just outside the window, the sky lights up with blazing streaks of silver and blue lightning.

I tense. I hate storms. Like full-on, can’t stand the sound of thunder, hate storms. I can’t help it. The sound reminds me of that awful day.

The day I might have killed my parents.

“Guess the sky shared my thoughts exactly,” Zay remarks as he rises to his feet. “I’ve got some shit to do tonight so, if everyone’s cool with this plan, I’m going to take off.”

“Where are you going?” Hunter wonders with his brows creased.

“I already said—shit,” Zay replies evasively as he heads for the door. “I’ll see you guys in the morning.” He exits the house, and then no one really says anything.

Finally, I can’t take the silence anymore.

“He’s going to be gone all night?” I ask, glancing at Hunter and Jax. “Or is he just planning on getting home late?” As soon as I ask, I realize something. “You know what? Never mind. It’s none of my damn business.”

“You’re fine,” Hunter assures me, tearing his gaze off the door. “You live here now, so you can totally ask us questions. However …” He wavers, trading a glance with Jax. “Zay’s night life is a bit complicated. For now, I think we should focus on the biggest complication.”

“Which is?” I wonder.

Hunter smiles softly while tucking a strand of my hair behind my ear. “Moving your beautiful ass in here.”

“Did you seriously just refer to my ass as beautiful?” I question with an arch of my brow.

He gives a shameless nod. “I did, and it’s the truth.”

“Dude,” Jax says, giving Hunter a pressing look.

Hunter looks at him and shrugs. “What? It’s the truth, and I know you agree with me.”

Jax doesn’t argue, his cheeks flushing ever so slightly. I have seen him blush before, and it’s the cutest thing I have ever seen. Right now, though, my cheeks are feeling a bit warm, too, due to the fact that Hunter and Jax basically just said I have a beautiful ass.

Jax flicks his gaze from me to Hunter. “Dude, why do you get off on embarrassing people?”

Hunter gives a lazy shrug. “I don’t know. Maybe because I don’t ever get embarrassed, so it fascinates me watching other people do it.”

I meticulously arch my brow. “You never get embarrassed?”

Hunter shakes his head, brushing a strand of hair out of his eyes. “Nope. Never.”

I tap my finger against my bottom lip. “Well, that just gave me motivation to embarrass you.”

He smirks. “Game on, pretty Raven. But trust me; you’re going to lose.”

“We’ll see.” I sound more confident than I am, since Hunter really doesn’t seem like the sort of guy who gets embarrassed.

“You know what, I’ll help her,” Jax chimes in. “I’d love to see you squirm.”

Hunter makes a big show of rolling his eyes. “Good luck with that, you two.”

“Thanks,” I remark cheekily.

Jaxon sticks out his fist for a fist bump, and I tap my knuckles against his.

“Aw … aren’t you two adorable?” Hunter mocks as he rises to his feet. Then he offers me his hand. “Come on; I want to show you to your new room.”

“Shouldn’t I wait until I’m officially moving in before I call it my room?” I state, placing my hand in his and letting him pull me to my feet. “Because something could happen that could prevent that from happening … me moving in, I mean.”

Hunter promptly shakes his head, his gaze turning serious. “No matter what, we’re going to get you out of that house.” His fingers stray to my side, and he lightly grazes them against my shirt, the side that conceals all of my new wounds and scars.

I wince, not because it hurts, but over the worry that perhaps he told Jax about the scars. Although, Jax may have seen them when he shared his body heat with me after he pulled me from the river.

Speaking of Jax, Hunter is now looking at him with a frown on his face.

I twist around to see what’s up only to find Jax staring off into empty space while bouncing his knee up and down and scraping the ring against his teeth.

“Jaxon, stop,” I say softly as I reach over and steer his hand away from his mouth.

He startles, darting his gaze to me.

“You were doing that scraping thing again,” I explain. “It’s so bad for your teeth.” I offer him a smile then move to pull my hand back, but he latches onto it. Then he stands and threads his fingers through mine. I would totally be okay with this—I mean, friends hold hands sometimes, right?—but it does feel a bit weird with Hunter holding my other hand.

Hunter notices this, too, his gaze fleetingly straying to Jax’s hand in mine. Jax makes no move to withdraw his hand, but to be fair, he appears to be extremely distracted and may not even notice.

Exhaling softly, Hunter lets go of my hand and loops his arm through mine. Then he plasters on a huge smile. “Come on, princess; let’s go see your new room,” he announces, going back to his cheerful self. Then he steers me toward the doorway with Jax in tow, still holding onto my hand.

“Princess?” I give Hunter an unimpressed look. “Dude, seriously?”

“What?” he asks innocently. “I think it’s fitting.”

I stare at him, unimpressed. “It’s the least fitting nickname you could possible use with me.”

“So, you prefer pretty Raven, then?” He’s all sorts of delighted amusement.

I let out a dramatic sigh. “I prefer my name, but if you have to give me a nickname, I’d prefer pretty Raven over anything else.”

His amusement doubles as we reach the stairs. “Glad I have your permission to use it.”

“Was that your plan all along?” I ask as we start up the stairway. “To make me hate every other nickname so that I’ll be okay with you calling me pretty Raven?”

He presses his hand to his chest, but the corners of his lips twitch. “Now, why would I ever do something like that?”

I shake my head, biting back a smile. It’s a weird sensation for me to be smiling, but it seems to be a growing occurrence around him.

“I think I won that round,” Hunter remarks, grinning as he quickens his pace toward the top of the stairway.

I internally sigh then shiver as Jax leans up behind me, putting his lips close to my ear. “I think we should come up with a plan on how we’re going to embarrass him because, personally, I’d really like to make him eat his own words.”

I peer around at him. We’re so close that are lips nearly brush, but he makes no effort to slant back. Still, I can see a trace of a smile on his face.

“Yeah, I totally agree. But I have a feeling it’s going to be super complicated,” I whisper, hoping Hunter can’t hear us.

“It will be,” Jaxon agrees. Then he pauses, wetting his lips with his tongue as he casts a glance at Hunter before looking back at me. “I think you’re the key, though.”

“Really?” I say with skepticism.

He nods, strands of his inky black hair falling into his eyes. “Yeah. I’ve seen him squirm a few times around you.”

“When?”

“One time was when we were talking about Katie.”

“Oh yeah, I kind of remember that,” I say. “I just don’t know why.”

Jax just offers me a small smile then gives my hand a squeeze. “I’ll think of something, but right now, let’s just focus on getting you set up for the night.”

“I agree,” Hunter intervenes. “And FYI, the next time you guys try to have a private conversation about me, you might want to try it someplace private.” He chuckles to himself as we start down a hallway that’s at the top of the stairs.

“Laugh all you want,” I mock as I follow him, “but you’re so going down.”

“You know what, even if I do, it might be worth it,” Hunter quips as he slows down in front of a closed door.

“Why’s that?” I ask, slowing to a stop with him.

“Because you seem happy plotting this,” he explains, meeting my gaze. “And if getting my ass handed to me means you continue to be happy, then I’m down with that.” He smiles at me, and it’s a real smile, not even an ounce of playfulness evident.

I’m oddly touched and am about to say something that might make me sound like a softy, but he distracts me by opening the door.

“You’re palace, pretty Raven.” He unloops his arm from mine and gives an exaggerated gesture to the room while bowing.

I giggle, to which he responds with the biggest grin ever.

“I like seeing you smile,” he tells me. “And I think Jax does, too.” He glances at Jax, and I instinctively follow his gaze.

He’s already looking at me with a strange expression on his face.

“Yeah,” he says quietly, his gaze carrying mine. “She’s—It’s beautiful.” He blinks then, his cheeks turning a little bit pink.

I would find it adorable, except mine are feeling a bit warm myself.

“Did you two seriously just blush at the same time?” Hunter questions amusedly. “That’s seriously the cutest thing I’ve ever seen, BFF—or should I say, BFFs.”

Jax lets out a heavy sigh then steps into the room, pulling me with him.

The room is average-sized, with dark hardwood floors, blue walls, and a king-sized bed and matching dresser. On the left wall is a doorway that appears to lead to a bathroom, and another doorway is to the right that looks like it goes to a closet. Framed photos line the walls, pictures of landscapes, cities, and a window covered with rain, all of which I’m guessing Hunter took.

“We can paint the walls a different color, if you want,” Jax says as he steers me into the middle of the room.

“The blue’s fine,” I assure him. “Are you sure you want me to stay in here? I mean, whose room is this even?”

“It’s a guest room,” Hunter explains, leaning against the doorframe, watching me with his arms crossed and an unreadable expression on his face.

“Oh.” I chew on my bottom lip. I can feel it, deep down inside me, something I haven’t felt in a long time.

Want.

I want to stay here.

In this room.

I want something to belong to me.

I want this.

And that is fucking terrifying.

“Where will your guests stay, if I’m crashing here?” I glance between Jaxon and Hunter.

“We never really have guests,” Jax assures me with his grey-eyed gaze fixed on me. “You’re the first, actually.”

“She’s not a guest,” Hunter clarifies, stepping toward us. “She lives here now.”

“You know I know that,” Jax says to him then looks at me. “I don’t think you’re a guest.”

“Technically, I am,” I stress. “Sure, I’m living with you, but this isn’t my house. And I promise I’m going to act like the perfect guest.” I flash him my biggest smile, but on the inside, my stomach is twisting into knots.

I worry how much I want this.

Worry that it will all get taken away.

“I should probably call my aunt and let her know I won’t be coming home tonight.” To be honest, I doubt she would even notice if I wasn’t there. My uncle, on the other hand, would probably notice way, way too much. “I need to borrow one of your phones,” I add then frown, realizing something. “Shit, I don’t know her number.”

A small smile touches Hunter’s pretty face. “You’re cute.”

I crinkle my nose, totally confused. “What? What the hell did I just do that was cute?”

He continues to smile at me while Jax chuckles. I feel like I’m missing out on some sort of joke.

“It’s cute that you think that’s an issue,” Hunter explains with a grin on his face. “Remember who you’re with, princess.”

I roll my eyes at his princess remark. “So, you can find her number?”

“Yep. Just give me a second. I left my phone downstairs.” With that, Hunter turns and walks out of the room, leaving me alone with Jax. It’s the first time I have been alone with him since he saved me, and I feel like I should … I don’t know, thank him again or something.

I turn to him. He still has a hold of my hand, his palm warm against mine. He’s also looking at me when I meet his gaze. His intense gaze.

“Hey,” I say nervously. “I feel like I need to say thank you again for saving me. I’m sure it had to suck big time jumping into that freezing cold water to save my ass.”

He immediately shakes his head, his gaze intense. “You don’t need to thank me at all, Ravenlee. I …” He swallows hard. “I’d do it again in a heartbeat.” He shakes his head again, wisps of hair falling into his eyes. “No, I take that back.” My heart starts to churn at his words when he reaches toward me and places his hand against his cheek. “I wouldn’t do it again because you’re never going to have to go through something like that ever again. I promise I won’t let that happen.” He wets his lips with his tongue, his eyes straying to my lips.

Wait … Is he going to kiss me?

No, there’s no way. I’m sure I’m reading the situation wrong. It’s not like I’m an expert on kissing.

“You can’t promise me that. And it’s not your responsibility to promise it,” I say in a shaky whisper, partly shook up by his words and partly nervous about the way he’s looking at me. Or, well, my mouth, anyway.

“Yes, it is,” he whispers back, still transfixed with my mouth.

I’m about to ask him why he thinks that when he leans in.

Holy shit, I think he’s going to kiss me, is the first thing to cross my mind. It’s the only thing that crosses my mind, because a slamming heartbeat of a second later, his lips brush mine. My hand instantly travels to his bicep, and I clutch on to him, feeling all sorts of trembling inside.

Jax pauses, pulling back slightly to look me in the eyes. “Was that okay? I don’t …” Worry fills his eyes. “It’s okay if you don’t want to. I don’t want to pressure you into doing something you don’t want to do.”

“You’re not,” I assure him. “I just … I don’t know what I’m doing.”

Face palm.

As soon as the words leave my lips, I want to retract them.

Did I seriously just tell him I’ve never kissed a guy before?

I have to give Jax an award, though, because he doesn’t look at me like I’m the freak that I am. He does, however, look surprised.

“No one’s ever kissed you before?” he asks, resting his hand on my waist.

With my lips pressed together, I shake my head.

Jax pauses for a beat, making me wish I could read minds. “Do you want me to kiss you again?”

I could say no.

I should say no … right?

Honestly, I kind of want him to kiss me. I have wished for a while that I could know what kissing a guy felt like. And Jax is sweet, kind, gorgeous, and he saved me. So, if I’m going to have my first kiss with someone, why not him? Yeah, I know he’s way out of my league, but I’m not going to pass up the opportunity. Plus … I don’t know … I felt this weird sense of familiarity when he kissed me, just a slight pull at my mind, but it’s enough to have me curious to see what happens if he kisses me again.

“Yeah.” The word just sort of slips off my tongue.

He seems a bit surprised, but the look quickly vanishes as he nods. He doesn’t say anything, simply wiggling his hand from mine. Then he tucks a strand of my hair behind my ear and, with that intense look in his eyes, he leans in and brushes his lips against mine.

Warmth floods my body, along with the sensation of familiarity. I try to figure out why, but all thoughts vacate my mind as he kisses me again, this time parting my lips with his tongue. I gasp, grasping onto him, my legs feeling like they’re going to buckle.

I’m not sure if he senses my inability to stand, or if it’s just coincidental, but as if he knows, Jax slips his arm around my back so he’s holding me up. Then he kisses me deeper, our tongues tangling together. I struggle to breathe. Struggle to think. Struggle to do anything really.

I hope I’m not messing this up.

Jax kisses me one last time before pulling back. His eyes are wild, and his lips part. “I’ve wanted to do that—”

“So, I just received a weird text from Zay.” The sound of Hunter’s voice interrupts us.

Jax immediately steps back, pulling away from me and leaving me feeling like I have cooties or something. Then he drifts his gaze toward the doorway. I look over there, too, right as Hunter walks into the room.

He’s looking down at his phone as he enters. “He says we got an invite to a party Saturday night …” He trails off as he glances up at Jax and me. Then his gaze skates between the two of us, and a confused look crosses his face. “Okay, what’d I miss?”

“Nothing,” Jax says quickly, too quickly. Then he rakes his fingers through his hair and shifts his weight.

If he’s trying to look suspicious, then he’s totally exceeding. What I don’t get, though, is why he’s acting sketchy.

Hunter stares at Jax for an unnerving amount of time while Jax focuses on anything but him.

Finally, Hunter gives up and enters the room. “Whatever. Keep your secret for now.”

Jax lets out a relieved sigh then elevates his gaze to Hunter. “So, whose party is it? I’m guessing someone interesting if you’re telling us about it.”

“It’s Brody.” Hunter scratches his wrist. “He invited basically everyone at our school, including rival families.”

A crease forms between Jax’s brow. “That’s fucking weird. Why would he do that?”

“I’m not sure.” Hunter chews on his bottom lip. “However, Zay thinks it might have something to do with this game.” He flicks a glance at me. “And if that’s the case, then that could mean he was behind the bridge incident with you, princess.”

“But I don’t even know a Brody,” I point out.

“I know. But he knows us and he’s very good at gathering intel, which means he probably found out you were hanging out with us the moment Zay made that scene in the classroom with you,” Hunter replies with a heavy sigh. “We really do need to take you around and show you all the people that are part of the families.” He steps toward me. “If it is Brody that pushed you off the bridge, this party could be the perfect opportunity for you to try confirm that.” Just like Jax did moments ago, you know, right before he kissed me, Hunter sweeps a strand of my hair from out of my face and tucks it behind my ear. “If you don’t feel comfortable going, though, we won’t force you.”

“No, I can handle it,” I assure him. “I want to find out who did this to me and make them pay.”

He offers me a smile, seeming kind of proud. I smile back, pretending I’m exactly who he’s proud of. But the truth is, I’m kind of scared. And worried. And a hell of a lot confused. So, you know, just a normal day in the life of Ravenlee.

Le sigh. Why does life have to be so complicated?

And then, to add to the complication, Hunter hands me his phone. “A little off the subject, but I entered your aunt’s phone number into the dial pad already, so you can just hit dial. Or if you want, you can just text her.”

“I should probably call her.” I take the phone from him then let my finger hover over the dial button. I don’t push it, though. “I’m not really sure what I should say to her,” I admit. “I mean, I’m sure she’s not going to give a shit if I spend the night somewhere, but she might be a little weird about it if I’m staying the night with three guys.”

“Just tell her you’re spending the night at Low’s house, then,” Hunter suggests. “Low can cover for you if you need her to.”

Speaking of Harlow …

“Okay, that sounds good. But, while we’re on the subject, I can’t go to the party with you guys on Saturday.”

Hunter’s brows pull together. “Why not?”

I shrug. “ Cause I have to go with your sister somewhere.”

“Where?” Hunter asks.

Jax looks at me, too, then, giving me his undivided attention.

“Um … to a place,” I say with another shrug.

Hunter crosses his arms and stares me down. “What sort of place?”

“To some sort of club,” I explain. “Jax kind of her heard talking to me about it.”

“Right. I forgot about that.” Jax nibbles on his bottom lip. “Low never said what club, though.”

“Yeah, she never told me, either,” I tell him. “She just said she’d give me more details later, but I haven’t seen or talked to her since then. Although, she could’ve tried to call me but couldn’t get a hold of me.”

Hunter mulls over what I said for a second. “We’re going to get you a new phone first thing in the morning.” I open my mouth to argue with him, but he talks over me. “It’s important that you have a phone just in case something happens.”

“True,” I agree, fighting back a shiver as I think of what it felt like to fall off that bridge and sink into the water. And how part of me wanted to keep sinking until nothing was left of me.

I discreetly tug at the sleeve of my jacket as the fresh wound that I put on myself begins to burn. Jax’s gaze tracks the move, and a frown forms on his face. I would panic, thinking he knew what I did in the bathroom, but how could he?

“Are any stores open that early?” I ask Hunter while trying to avoid Jax’s dissecting gaze.

“No, but I know the owner of one of the stores, and I’m sure he’ll open up early if I ask him to,” Hunter tells me. “I’ll call him right after you finish talking to your aunt.”

“All right. But FYI, you have a lot of connections,” I inform him.

He grins cheekily. “That’s because I’m a guy of many talents.” He playfully tugs on a strand of my hair, causing Jax to frown.

It makes me feel uncomfortable, and I’m unsure why. Because we kissed?

Holy shit, Jax kissed me!

Reality bitch smacks me like a mother effer. Why did I do that? Kiss a guy who I’m supposed to be living with? Sure, I know why I did it, but that doesn’t mean I should’ve—

Hunter’s phone suddenly rings, and the distraction sends relief washing over me. Low’s name flashes across the screen, and I hand the phone to Hunter.

A hint of worry flashes through his eyes as he answers, “Is everything okay?” A pause, and then he flits his gaze to me. “Yeah, she’s here … Why?” He pauses again. “Sure.” Then he hands the phone to me. “She wants to talk to you.”

“Me?” I point to myself stupidly.

Hunter cracks a smile, but it promptly dissolves. “Yeah, but I’m not sure why.”

Puzzled, I take the phone from him. “Hello?” I will admit that it’s really weird to be talking on the phone with someone who I know isn’t going to give me some sort of shitty remark, like my aunt or Dixie May.

“Hey, it’s Harlow, in case my brother didn’t tell you,” she says in that light tone she almost always seems to have.

“I know,” I tell her. “I was actually holding his phone in my hand when you called.”

“Why?” she asks. “I mean, I tried to call your phone, and it went straight to voicemail.”

“Yeah, I dropped it in the river, and it got ruined,” I reply vaguely, unsure if I want to tell her the whole story of what happened on the phone or not.

“That sucks,” Harlow says. “Are you going to be able to get a new one soon?”

“Yeah, I’ll have one tomorrow,” I tell her.

“Cool.” She gives a short pause. “So, I don’t want to like freak you out or anything, but I feel like I should tell you about a rumor I heard at school. Not that I believe it or anything, but you also weren’t there later in the day, so I just wanted to double-check that you’re okay.”

Panic begins to seize a hold of me. Rumors? Like perhaps I’m a murderer?

“What’d you hear?” My voice comes out sort of crackly, and Jax and Hunter completely notice.

“Is everything okay?” Hunter mouths while Jax looks at me worriedly.

I waver then shrug. “I’m not sure yet,”I mouth back.

His lips tug downward into a frown, and he casts a quick glance at Jax.

I turn away from the guys and squeeze my eyes shut. “What’d you hear?” I hold my breath.

“That you got suspended because you were dealing drugs,” she replies in a hesitant tone. “But I don’t really believe it. However, you also weren’t in school later in the day, so I thought I’d check in and see if anything is wrong.”

“I’m fine,” I assure her. Aren’t I? “There was just an incident at lunch that prevented me from going back to school.” I glance at Hunter, unsure how much he wants me to tell her.

“If you want to, you can tell her about the bridge incident,” he says, as if reading my mind. “But can you please keep the whole game starting thing a secret?”

I nod and give him a thumbs-up. Then I proceed to tell Harlow what happened.

By the time I’m finished, she’s completely and utterly furious.

“Oh my God, I hate this damn town!” she spats. “Seriously, everyone here sucks.”

“I almost agree with you,” I assure her, my gaze straying to Jax and Hunter, who are watching me with confusion. “Not everyone does, though.”

“Yeah, I guess,” she mumbles. Then she heaves a heavy sigh. “I’m glad Jax was there to save you. And my brother. You really do need to learn how to swim, though.”

I cringe at the idea. “I wish I could, but I’ve never been able to.”

“Well, never can be a temporary word,” she informs me. “You should ask Hunter or Jax to teach you. Both of them are really good swimmers. But I’m sure you know that since they saved you today.”

“I’ll think about it,” I tell her, but I don’t want to at all.

“Good,” she says, sounding like she’s calmed down a bit. “I have somewhere to be, so I can’t talk for much longer, but there’s so much stuff I want to talk to you about, so I’m wondering if you want to have lunch tomorrow with me.”

I smile at that. “I’d love to.”

“Awesome. Meet me at my locker at lunchtime?”

I agree, and then we hang up.

The second I get off the phone, Hunter asks, “What’d she want?”

“She heard I was dealing drugs and got suspended from school,” I tell him. “She wanted to fact check the rumor.”

Jax, who’s sank down on the bed, straightens, tension rippling through his body. “What?”

I shrug. “I’m sure it’s whoever pushed me off the bridge. Well, that or Dixie May saw an opportunity if she noticed I wasn’t at school for the last half of the day.”

Hunter shakes his head with his jaw set tight. “Somebody is going to get their ass kicked, even if it is your stupid cousin.”

“You gonna beat up my cousin for me?” I question with amusement.

His lips twitch, clearly annoyed. “I want to, but I don’t feel right hitting a girl, so I guess I’ll just have to help you make that happen.”

I struggle not to grin like an idiot at the idea of Hunter holding Dixie May back while I smack her around a bit.

“Is that all Low wanted?” Hunter double-checks. “You guys talked for a bit …”

“Pretty much,” I tell him. “Oh, well, she wanted to see if I wanted to go to lunch with her tomorrow.”

“No. You can’t,” Jax sputters so suddenly and sharply that he startles me badly enough that I nearly pee my pants.

I arch a brow at him. “Dude, as grateful as I am for you saving me, you can’t just boss me around.”

He steps toward me, panic flashing in his eyes. “I’m not trying to boss you around. It’s just too dangerous right now for you to be wandering around.” He roughly rakes his fingers through his hair. “With the game starting and with what happened on the bridge today …” He shakes his head, struggling to breathe. “You can’t be by yourself. Ever.”

“That’s not your decision,” I stress. “And, while shit may have happened today, I’m more prepared now. And I know how to handle myself in a fight.”

His panic magnifies, and he reaches for me, but then he jerks back. “I … I can’t …”

Hunter steps between us and gives Jax’s shoulder a soft squeeze. “You need to step outside, takes some deep breaths, and try to calm down.”

Jax lowers his head. “I can’t … I can’t lose her again.”

“I know,” Hunter says in a tone barely above a whisper. “But you’re freaking Raven out right now, and I know you don’t want to do that to her, right?”

A beat of silence goes by, and then Jax whispers hoarsely, “No.”

“Okay, then go calm down for a moment.” Hunter pats Jax on the shoulder.

Jax bobs his head up and down then swings around him to leave the room. When he reaches the doorway, he glances back and briefly locks gazes with me.

Pulsating fear.

That’s what I see in his eyes.

To the point where I can’t even breathe.

When he leaves the room, Hunter asks, “Are you okay?”

Nodding, I redirect my attention back to him. “Is he, though?”

Hunter wavers, chewing on his bottom lip. “He will be.”

I nod for a second, Jax’s words replaying in my head. “This person that you said Jax lost in a similar way as what happened to me today … how long ago did that happen?”

Hunter smashes his lips together, a series of emotions flickering across his face. “Over a decade ago.”

“Oh,” I whisper. “It seems like it was more recent … with how much pain he seems to be in.”

Instead of commenting on what I said, Hunter briefly searches my eyes. “The girl he lost was the only girl he’s ever really loved, so he didn’t really get over it, I don’t think …” He swallows hard. “None of us did, really.”

“You all loved her?” My heart aches with a pain I don’t know if I fully understand.

He gives an unsteady nod then steps toward me, wisps of hair falling into his eyes that look watery, as if he’s about to cry. “Me, Jax, Zay, and this girl, together, the four of us made up a whole. We did everything together; played together, were there for each other”—he swallows hard—“suffered together.” He momentarily dazes off before blinking his attention back to me. “But then she was gone, and a part of us withered with her … We’ve never really been whole again.”

Hearing him speak of this girl makes me want to cry. I’m not much of a crier, though, so the sensation is a bit unsettling.

“I’m sorry,” I say, “that you guys lost a part of you.”

Again, he searches my eyes. For what, I’m not sure.

“You don’t need to be sorry.” He reaches up and tucks a strand of my hair behind my ear. “Maybe you’ll end up fixing what was broken that day.”

My pulse is pounding from his words and his touch. “It sounds like some pretty big shoes to fill.”

“They are,” he agrees, tracing his fingers down the side of my face. “You’re so beautiful.”

I don’t think he means to say the words aloud because, the second he does, he pulls back and clears his throat.

“But yeah, anyway, I’m totally crossing the BFF line. I know.” He goes straight back to the smiling Hunter so quickly that I nearly get whiplash. Then he checks the time on a clock on the wall. “Shit, it’s getting late. You should probably call your aunt so we can get you settled in for the night.”

Way to change the subject. Part of me wants to call him out on it, but something stops me. Maybe it’s this heaviness in my chest. Or the way his eyes are watery, as if he’s still teetering on the edge of an emotional cliff. Whatever the reason, I let it go, nod, and then dial my aunt’s number.

“I just hope she’s not a huge pain in the ass,” I mumble as I wander to the bed and sit down, waiting for her to answer.

He watches me momentarily, hesitancy written on his face. Then, muttering something incoherent under his breath, he walks over and sits down beside me, so close that out legs touch.

“Everything will be okay,” he tries to reassure me while sweeping a strand of my hair out of my face. I’m starting to become aware that he likes touching my hair a lot. That’s okay. Deep down, I can admit I like it, too.

It’s been a long time since I’ve been touched so gently.

The phone rings four times before my aunt answers.

“Hello?” she sounds confused, probably because she doesn’t recognize the number.

“Hey,” I say as I continue to bite on my thumbnail. “This is Raven.”

“Why are you calling me from a random number?” The confusion in her tone instantly morphs to annoyance.

“Because I broke mine,” I admit.

“Well, I’m not buying you a new one,” she sneers. “You’ll just have to deal without having a phone.”

I bite my fingernail harder, to the point where I expect it to split and peel off. Hunter reaches over and moves my hand away from my mouth. I’m about to toss him a thankful look when he places my hand on his leg, palm up, and begins tracing the lines of my skin with his fingertip. The sensation is so soothing and sedating to the point where I almost feel stoned.

“I just called to ask if I could spend the night at a friend’s house,” I tell my aunt in a calm voice.

She snorts a laugh. “Nice joke, but I know there’s no way you have friends.”

The scars on my side throb.

“Well, I do, and I want to spend the night.” My tone is a bit unsteady, but Hunter keeps on tracing those lines, trying to calm me down. “And if you let me, you won’t have to deal with me for the night,” I add on enticingly. “Won’t that be nice?” I hold my breath, waiting for her to answer, hoping she doesn’t get my uncle involved.

Hoping I don’t have to go back to that house,

To the walls made of nightmares,

And roof made of bars,

Where the monster lives and feeds,

With its claws that like to peel back the flesh of bruised, rotten apples.

“You know what? You can stay over there. But you can’t come home tonight to get your stuff.” With that, she hangs up on me.

I furrow my brows at her last words. Why can’t I get my stuff?

I guess it doesn’t matter. At least I can spend the night.

I hand the phone back to Hunter. “She’s cool with it.”

Relief cascades across his pretty features. “Good. I was starting to get worried there for a moment that I was going to have to blackmail her tonight instead of tomorrow.” He smiles as he pockets his phone. “Not that I have a problem with either. I just prefer to be a little bit more prepared.”

I smile at that. “Well, you can prepare for another day because, tonight, we’re good. Although, she said I can’t come home to get my clothes. But since the outfit I’m wearing was washed, I should be fine.” I crinkle my nose. “Although, these shorts are going to be a pain in the ass to sleep in.”

He sinks his teeth into his bottom lip as he considers something. “You can borrow a shirt of mine to sleep in, if you want.”

“Okay. Yeah, I think I might take you up on that offer,” I tell him gratefully.

He continues to stare at me with his teeth sunk into his lip.

Growing self-conscious, I rub my face and smooth my hands over my hair. “What’s up? Do I like have something on my face or something?”

He shakes his head. “Nah. I’m just thinking about some stuff.” He stares at me for a slamming heartbeat longer before standing. “So, since you’re gonna be spending the night, I think we should do something fun.”

I stand up with him. “On a school night?”

He shrugs. “Sure. Why not? We don’t have any parental supervision to tell us not to. Plus, most of us are eighteen, except for you. But, since we’re babysitting you for the night, you have to do what I say.” Grinning, he playfully tugs on a strand of my hair.

I can’t help but chuckle at him—he’s so amusing. “So, what am I supposed to do, then, boss?”

Right then, Jax enters the room. Hunter’s smile fades a smidgeon as his gaze strays to him. I turn to look at him, too, worry stirring inside me at the apprehension on his face.

“Are you okay?” Hunter asks him cautiously.

Jax nods, stuffing his hands in his pocket. “I think so.”

He looks at me then. “I owe you an apology, though.” He steps closer to me. “I didn’t mean to try to be controlling. I just panicked.” He inches even closer until the tips of our boots brush. “I just want to make sure you’re safe, that’s all.”

“I will be,” I promise. “But, if it makes you feel better, you can call in and check on me all the time.”

“Okay.” He releases an uneven exhale. “Can you carry some pepper spray on you, too?”

“That sounds reasonable,” I tell him then smile, hoping to get him to smile. “And if all else fails and I do get into some trouble, I promise I know how to throw a mean right hook.”

He smiles, but it’s a bit forced.

I rack my brain for a way to cheer him up, but Hunter beats me to the punch.

“I have an idea that will cheer you up,” he says, stepping up beside me but looking at Jax.

Jax tears his gaze off me and looks at Hunter. “What?”

“Let’s have a slumber party,” Hunter replies with a grin.

Thinking he’s joking, I snort a laugh.

His eyes glitter with mischief as he looks back at me. “Laugh all you want, pretty Raven, but I’m being completely serious.”

I cock a brow at him. “You want to have a slumber party tonight?”

He gives an exaggerated nod. “Yep. We’re going to braid each other’s hair, do our nails, play truth or dare, and have pillow fights.”

I giggle. Yes, me, Ravenlee, actually freakin’ giggles, and Hunter grins, looking totally pleased with himself.

“Have you ever actually had a slumber party before?” I question, crossing my arms.

He shakes his head. “Nope. Have you?”

I shake my head. “Nope. I’m a virgin slumber partier.” As soon as the words leave my mouth, I internally cringe.

Hunter briefly smashes his lips together while Jax clears his throat a few times.

Can you say awkward?

“Well, so are Jax and I,” Hunter finally says, breaking the awkwardness, much to my relief. “So, I guess it’s going to be a first for all of us.”

I assess him closely. “Are you being serious right now?”

He nods. “I never kid about slumber parties. So, are you down?”

I shrug. “I guess so.”

Grinning, he glances at Jax. “What about you, man? Are you down for a little party fun tonight?”

I look at Jax and find him chewing on his lip ring with an undecided look on his face. Hunter is pressing him with a look, and I get the feeling that they’re having one of those silent conversations that I have seen them have a few times. This one probably has to do with Hunter basically begging Jax to agree to do this.

I’m about to tell Jax that he doesn’t have to when he looks at me.

“Only if I get to braid your hair,” he finally says to me.

I giggle for the second time in a minute, probably looking like a total dumbass. “You seriously want to braid my hair?”

He smiles, and it seems genuine. “I do. And I really want to hear you giggle like that again.”

“I second that,” Hunter intervenes. When I look at him with my brow raised, he shrugs. “You look absolutely adorable when you giggle.”

I shake my head and roll my eyes. “You’re the cheesiest guy I’ve ever met.”

“But you like it,” he insists with a smile.

I hold up my finger and thumb an inch apart. “Maybe just a little bit.”

Chuckling, he heads for the doorway. “Come on; let’s go get this party started.”

I turn to Jax, who’s looking right at me. “You really don’t have to do this if you don’t want to. It’s kind of weird, right?”

“A little,” he agrees. “But I want to.”

“Just as long as you get to braid my hair, right?” I tease, because I honestly can’t tell if he’s being serious or not.

Nodding, he looks completely serious as he extends his hand toward my head and sweeps strands of my hair out of my face. “If I get to do one thing tonight, it’s that I want to braid your hair.” When he pulls his hand back from my hair, he ends up softly tugging on the strands. The same tugging sensation floods my mind with a memory …

“I’m not sure if I’m doing it right?” the boy says as he tries to braid my hair.

It’s been a while since it’s been braided, because my mom usually does it. But I haven’t seen her in a while, either.

“Just try your best,” I try to reassure him, knowing that he’s only doing this because he knows I miss my hair being braided.

“I will this time,” he tells me as he fiddles with my hair. “But after this, I’m going to learn how to so that, next time, you’ll have the most perfect braid ever.”

I smile at that. He’s always so nice to me. And makes me feel safe—

“Raven.” Jax’s voice tugs me back to reality, along with a brush of his fingers along my cheekbone. “Are you okay?”

As my vision comes back into focus, I become aware that we have left the bedroom and have started to descend the stairs, but I can’t remember doing either.

“Um … Yeah, I’m fine,” I lie, feeling as though I just completely lost track of time, which I kind of did.

I’m not sure why I keep having these memories or what they mean. But, with the way that they play out, I can’t help wondering if the guys are somehow connected to them. How? Are they the boys in them? That would mean I already know them, though. While I don’t want to ask just yet, the words almost leave my lips. I need to know, yet I fear knowing.

Just then, Hunter appears at the bottom of the stairway, distracting me.

“So, I’m thinking we need margaritas,” he declares as he kicks off his boots in the foyer. “That’s a slumber party drink, right?”

“That sounds like a super sugary drink, if you ask me,” I inform him as we reach the bottom of the stairs.

I can feel Jax’s gaze burrowing into me, and I can tell he’s concerned about me.

That makes two of us.

Hunter pulls a face. “Yeah, I know. I’m just trying to think of slumber party type drinks.”

“We could just take shots,” I suggest as I slip off my own boots.

He points a finger at me. “Shots aren’t slumber party drinks.”

“We could make a fancy shot,” Jax offers as he kicks off his own shoes.

When I glance at him, he offers me a smile. Hopefully, that’s an indicator that he’s going to let my freak-out on the stairway drop. Although, what about us kissing? Is he going to bring that up? Should I?

Oh, my hell, why am I such a dumbass? I never should have kissed him.

It was such a good kiss, though …

Jax’s brows suddenly tug together, and I become stupidly aware that I’m just staring at him. Or, well, more specifically, at his mouth.

Forcing my gaze away from his lips, I meet his gaze. “Fancy shots sound fun, but I don’t really know any.”

“That’s okay. We can look up recipes online.” He digs his phone out of his pocket.

“And I’ll go see what alcohol we have.” Hunter starts down the hallway that leads to the kitchen while Jax and I head into the living room.

Halfway in, he reaches over and threads his fingers with mine.

My pulse instantly quickens from the contact, but I don’t pull back, allowing him to guide me over to the sofa. Then he sits down, pulling me down with him so we’re sitting close. Like really, really close, to the point where our sides are touching.

He lets go of my hand, and I figure that’s that, but then he drapes his arm along the back of the sofa right behind me. The scent of his cologne kisses my nostrils, and I find myself discreetly breathing it in. You know, like a total weirdo.

My mind again drifts to how we kissed earlier and how neither of us have said anything about it. Is that normal after you kiss a guy?

“So, what are some of your favorite flavors?” Jax asks with his gaze on the screen as he scrolls through some recipes. “Cherry? Lime? Coffee? Lemon?” Wisps of his hair dangle in his eyes as he glances up at me. “Any of those sound good?”

My mind is still half-stuck in kiss land, and I end up blinking at him like a doe-eyed idiot, I’m sure.

“What …? Oh. Yeah. Flavors.” Face palm, Ravenlee. Way to look like a spaz. “Personally, I think cherry is kind of barf. Lime’s okay, but lemon’s better. Coffee is the bestest of the bestest flavors.” I smile.

So does he.

He has a pretty smile. Sad, but pretty.

“I love coffee, too.” He looks back at his screen. “So, I’m thinking that maybe this right here might be our best bet.”

I lean over to get a look at the recipe. “It has a lot of coffee liquor in it. Do you have all of what the recipe needs?” When he doesn’t answer right away, I glance up at him.

He appears distracted, his gaze fixed on me.

“Is everything okay?” I ask worriedly.

He bobs his head up and down, blinking a few times. “I’m fine.” He pushes a smile onto his face then shifts closer to me so we’re basically cuddled up together. “You just smell good, that’s all.”

I chuckle. “I smell like Hunter’s bodywash.”

He drums his fingers along the back of the sofa. “Well, it smells better on you.”

My lips pull upward. “Is that your way of telling me I smell nice, Jaxon?”

The corners of his lips quirk. “So, we’re back to Jaxon, then?”

I flash him a cheeky smile. “What? You think just because you saved me, I’m gonna stop teasing you?”

He rubs his lips together contemplatively. “No … but I thought maybe, since we kissed, you might.”

“Oh.” Awkward silence stretches between us, and I rack my mind for something to say.

“I’m sorry if I’m making you uncomfortable,” he quickly says. “I just thought … I wanted to … I needed to …” He shakes his head and sighs. “I just wanted to make sure you were okay with what happened between us. I mean, the kiss. I know you said you were okay with it, but then we were interrupted, and I never got to make sure you were okay after the kiss.” His cheeks flush slightly. “But yeah, anyway …” He stares at me expectantly, waiting for me to say something.

“I’m okay with the kiss,” I tell him truthfully. “I mean, I’m not a kissing expert, but it felt nice. Like really, really nice.”

“I’m not really a kissing expert, either,” he admits, sitting up straighter and rotating his body toward me.

“What?” I can’t keep my shock concealed.

Embarrassment crosses his features. “Yeah, I know it’s a little weird.”

“It’s not weird. At least, not to me. I just thought that you had a serious girlfriend? You know, that girl in the hallway that you had us run away from.”

“We weren’t that serious. Or, well, I guess that was sort of the problem.” His gaze drops from mine and guilt masks his expression. “If I’m being real, I wasn’t that great of a boyfriend. I was distant, and I’m sure it was frustrating for her. And I feel bad for that, but I’ve had a very hard time connecting with people.”

“Except for Hunter and Zay?”

“Yeah, except for them.” He pauses. “And that girl who was my friend when I was younger.”

“The one you lost?”

He nods, his eyes welded to mine. “She was one of my best friends.”

I force down the lump welling in my throat. “I’m so sorry, Jax. I really am.” Taking an inhale through my nose, I reach up and place my palm against his cheek. “I know what that pain feels like, and I hate that you’ve felt it.”

“I hate that you’ve felt it, too,” he whispers, his gaze dropping to my lips. “I’ve never felt this comfortable talking to someone in my entire life.” He wets his lips with his tongue. “I want to kiss you again.”

My breath falters from my lips. “You do?”

He nods then leans in—

“So, when it comes to booze choices, we’re super limited,” Hunter says as he enters the room.

Jax swiftly leans back, and I damn near pee my pants from the interruption.

Yeah, can you say awkward?

“We’re out of almost every …” Hunter trails off as his blue-eyed gaze lands on us. “Why do you guys look flushed?” he questions suspiciously.

It’s like he knows Jax and I were about to … Well, I’m not quite certain what Jax and I were about to do. Sure, I thought he was going to kiss me, but I could be wrong. Wouldn’t be the first time I did something stupid like thinking a guy was going to kiss me.

One time, when I was in middle school, I had this science partner who was semi-nice to me. We were hanging out during class and laughing about something. Then he suddenly leaned in, and I legit thought he was going to kiss me. All he did, though, was pull a candy wrapper out of my hair. So, not only did I embarrass myself by puckering my lips, but I also apparently had a candy wrapper in my hair for most of the school day.

Story of my life.

“We’re not flushed,” Jaxon lies, and it’s completely obvious.

Hunter makes a big show of rolling his eyes. “Bro, I know you’re lying, but whatever. I’ll let it drop for now, but only because we have a slumber party to plan.” He strolls into the room and plops down onto the sofa that’s across from us. “Later, though, I might make us play a game of truth or dare and make you fess up.” He grins, eliciting a sigh from Jax.

Hunter’s smile broadens, and then he slides his gaze to me. “That goes for you, too, beautiful girl.” When my cheeks warm, Hunter looks all too pleased with himself. “You’re blushing.”

“And you’re driving me crazy, BFF,” I retort, trying not to squirm, knowing it will only encourage him more.

He chuckles, his eyes crinkling around the corners.

He’s so gorgeous. Not that I’d ever say that aloud, but in my mind, I’m going to tell myself it over and over again.

His cheeky smile turns into a curious one and, oh my God, I’m so worried he’s going to ask me what I’m thinking. Thankfully, he doesn’t.

“So, what’s the plan with the drinks.” Hunter changes the subject, reclining back in the sofa and resting his arms along the armrest.

“She likes coffee flavor the best, so I was thinking this.” Jax slants forward and shows Hunter the screen of his phone.

Hunter glances at the screen then arches a brow. “You know we have none of those things, right?”

“I figured.” Jax leans back into the sofa. “We could always get Benton to pick us up some stuff.”

Hunter glances at a clock on the wall. “That might work. It’s getting late, though. And, at this point, we’ll definitely be going to school late tomorrow, if at all.”

“That’s fine with me,” Jax replies then turns to me. “Only if you’re cool with it?”

I shrug. “I already said I was … But, who’s Benton?”

“Zay’s brother.” Jax's gaze flits toward Hunter, and the two of them trade a funny look.

I look between the two of them. “Why are you guys looking at each other like that?”

Hunter stares at Jax for a beat or two longer before tearing his gaze off Jaxon and fixing his eyes on me. “It’s nothing really. We just …” Hunter wavers, chewing on his lip ring. Well, I guess it’s more like he’s sucking on it. “Benton is still part of our fathers’ world, so he can be kind of sketchy sometimes.”

“He’s not completely awful,” Jax stresses. “And, to be honest, we’ve all questioned if he actually wants to work for our fathers or if he has a hidden agenda. But, whatever the reason, he’s still part of that world, so if we meet up with him, it’s best to make the visit brief in order to avoid any of his shit drifting into our lives.”

“Okay.” I dither. “Is Zay going to get pissed off that you guys are having him buy us booze? I mean, maybe it’d be better if you just found someone else who’s twenty-one.”

“Benton’s not even twenty-one. He’s barely twenty.” Hunter props his boot-clad foot onto his knee. “He just has connections.”

“Oh … How does he get alcohol for you, then?” I wonder. “Does he have, like, a fake ID?”

Jaxon shakes his head, wisps of his hair falling into his eyes. “No, he just has connections at bars because his father owns most of them.”

My lips form an O. “So, Zay’s dad owns all the bars in town? That’s impressive because, when I went exploring the town, I noticed there’s a lot of freaking bars here.”

“There’s underground ones, too,” Hunter informs me. “They’re not really underground, but they’re not visible to anyone just wandering around town. You have to know where they are to find them.” He rises to his feet. “But, trust me; you don’t want to even know where they are, because the only people who hang out there are corrupt, evil bastards.” He digs his phone out of his pocket. “Anyway, enough with the heavy talk. We’re supposed to be having fun tonight, so let me see if I can get a hold of Benton, and then we’ll get this little party started.” He grins, but I can tell a hint of nervousness resides in his eyes as he dials Benton’s number, wandering toward the doorway with the phone up to his ear.

I turn to Jax, who looks a bit anxious himself, as Hunter walks out of the room. “Are you sure we should use this Benton to get our alcohol? It kind of seems like you guys are suddenly getting nervous.”

Jax promptly shakes his head. “Nah, we’ll be fine. I promise.”

If that’s the case, then why is he bouncing his knee up and down? Then, to add to my confusion, he suddenly gets to his feet.

“I’ll be right back, okay?” With that, he exits the room, heading off in the direction Hunter did.

Awesome. They’re clearly keeping something from me.

I guess it doesn’t really matter. I barely know them …

Right?