Madness of the Horde by Zoey Draven

Chapter Thirty-Eight

Vienne was pale and listless as she stood towards the back of dozens and dozens of Dakkari.

The horde had gathered to give Lokkaru back to the earth, back to Kakkari. I’d chosen to have her buried on the shores of one of the only lakes in the eastlands. They were few and far between but this lake had a beauty of its own and reflected the moonlight on the edges of the territory.

Since most of the eastlands belonged to the ungira, we’d needed to travel far enough away to ensure no packs were nearby. They burrowed under the earth and I wanted to ensure that Lokkaru rested with peace as Kakkari welcomed her home once more.

I was keenly aware that the lake was near the ancient groves, where Lokkaru had told me the heartstone lay, buried with her father’s body.

The horde had traveled the majority of the afternoon, forgoing daily tasks, daily duties, daily trainings. Our horde lay empty and deserted further east but we would return in the early hours of morning after we said our final goodbyes.

It was my duty as Vorakkar to dig out the earth where Lokkaru would rest. She was wrapped in shimmering gold cloth, from head to toe. Her body had been cleaned and lovingly washed, her skin oiled. She’d been adorned with gold and trinkets, her face veiled in transparent cloth.

The golden glow of torchlight illuminated her resting place. I wiped my brow, my bare chest streaked with black earth, as I lifted my arms towards Hedna, who lowered Lokkaru’s stiff body into them.

I turned and gently laid her inside, kneeling in the deep earth beside her. For a moment, I breathed in the fragrant soil, an ache settling in my chest. It was dark there and I knew what I would see before I did.

The shadow of Lokkaru was next to me. Her eyes were glowing, a soft smile on her face that seemed frozen into place.

“Do not fear this,” she whispered to me, the appearance of her shadowed form making my breath hitch in my chest, that familiar panic rising. “This is not a terrible thing.”

I squeezed my eyes shut, my head beginning to pound.

Not now, not now, I pleaded with myself.

When I opened my eyes, Lokkaru’s shadow was gone and my breath released in a rush. Turning my eyes down to her veiled face, I touched her cheek, murmuring a prayer to Kakkari.

“Lik Kakkari srimea tei kirtja,” I murmured.

May Kakkari watch over you.

I stayed there for long moments and then I knew it was time. I rose, pulling myself from her grave, nodding at Hedna before seeking out Vienne once more.

As the rest of the horde came forward, circling the grave, murmuring their own prayers to Kakkari, I went to my leikavi, tucked behind them all.

I was worried about her. She’d returned to my voliki the night before, short moments after she’d left. She’d looked pale.

In a small, calm, even voice, she’d merely said, “Lokkaru is dead.”

She hadn’t cried. She’d seemed…numb. In shock.

She’d been that way ever since, and beyond my own grief, I was worried. I felt woefully helpless in situations like these. I did not know how to care for a female. I did not know how to comfort her with words.

I should know these things. She would be my Morakkari, after all. I wanted to comfort her.

“Leikavi,” I murmured to her, softly so no Dakkari around us would hear. “Tell me what you need.”

Thatgot her attention and she blinked, looking up at me in saddened surprise.

“What I need?” she whispered.

I inclined my head.

Her brows furrowed and she said, “Oh, Davik.”

“Neffar?”

She glanced back at the crowd gathering around Lokkaru’s grave. “This isn’t about me. This is about you and your horde’s loss. Please don’t worry about me.”

I frowned. “You have as much of a right to grieve as the rest.”

“I feel like I don’t,” was what she whispered, looking up at me with shimmering eyes, shaking her head. Her arms were wrapped around her body and though the night was unnaturally warm for the season, she trembled like she was cold, a fur shawl wrapped around her shoulders. “I knew her for a week. You’ve known her for ten years.”

“Time has nothing to do with grief,” I told her and she looked up at me in saddened surprise.

Though Vienne had only known Lokkaru for that short period of time, it didn’t diminish the affection they’d felt for one another. I also worried that it had been Vienne that had discovered her body. Vienne had already seen so much death within her own family—her father, her grandmother. Both deaths had been gruesome and violent.

I cupped the back of her neck. Though I still could smell the earth clinging to me from Lokkaru’s grave, I scented her underneath it…soft and sweet and warm.

Dropping my forehead to hers, I decided to say nothing right then. We would discuss this once we were back at the encampment, once she was warm in my furs and had recovered a little more from the sadness that covered her like a veil.

When I pulled back, needing to return for the final burial, Vienne caught my hand. Her voice trembled as she said, “I—I think she knew.”

“Knew what?”

“That she was leaving soon.”

“Lokkaru was old,” I said gently, reaching out to brush her cheek. “Her time in this life was over. She has gone to the next.”

Vienne looked like she wanted to say more, her eyes darting between mine. Then her shoulders sagged slightly and she nodded, releasing my hand. I frowned, catching hers again when I realized her fingers were chilled to the bone.

“You are freezing, Vienne,” I murmured, my brows furrowing.

“I’m all right,” she assured me. Her eyes looked past me, towards the grave. “It looks like they are waiting for you.”

When I turned, I saw the eyes of my horde on us, though they averted their gazes quickly.

“Come,” I said, pulling her forward. “You will be at my side, as my Morakkari should be.”

Where you belong, I added silently.

When I knew that she would be my wife, that definitive moment last night—that determination that had risen within my chest, certain and absolute and unyielding—still left me reeling with its potency. But I didn’t question. For all my faults, I always made firm decisions and stood behind them.

As I pulled her forward, I didn’t notice her hesitation as she fell into step beside me.

Or maybe I simply ignored it.