The Alien’s Obsession by Zoey Draven

Chapter Sixteen

Lainey lay awake in her bed, restless and unable to sleep. Just like last night.

Only tonight, she felt like she was on the verge of tears every other moment because she kept seeing Kirov’s disappointment in her mind’s eye when she’d told him that she wasn’t ready for a relationship with him just because they’d hooked up. Or his stunned hurt when she’d told him she didn’t believe that she was his mate, that she didn’t believe him.

Just like always, when Lainey felt backed into a corner, she always came out with fists swinging, not caring who got hurt.

Only that time, it was Kirov that got hurt. All because she’d lied. He’d asked her for the truth and she’d lied.

She squeezed her eyes shut, tears rolling from the corners. It was nights like these when Lainey remembered why she didn’t like herself sometimes. She pushed people away when they got too close. It was why she didn’t have any close friends anymore, like she hadn’t been in a relationship for a long time, why she hardly spoke to her parents—though there were other reasons for that.

Still.

It was a pattern, a pattern she hated, but repeated consciously.

And why? For what purpose? Why couldn’t she let herself get close to someone?

Hours ticked by, but the guilt never lessened. She replayed their conversation over in her mind and cringed. She hadn’t intended to essentially break up with him, but it had come out that way.

Kirov had made his feelings and intentions clear, from the very beginning. He was open about those things. He didn’t hesitate to touch her, or call her beautiful, or look at her with those blue eyes with an expression that had her heart pounding in her chest. He didn’t have walls around his heart, not when it came to her. For her, he’d let her see him.

And to reciprocate, her heart was more difficult to breach than Fort Knox and she’d closed the gates on him hard.

She’d kissed him and touched him and teased him and laughed with him and let him pleasure her body…and then she retreated with her tail between her legs, giving some bullshit excuse.

Of course, he was angry and upset and disappointed.

If their situations were reversed, Lainey would be pissed. She would feel used and discarded and furious and hurt.

That killed her…because she’d done exactly that to Kirov and he hadn’t deserved it.

For a brief while, she fell into a fitful sleep, tossing and turning underneath the furs, dreaming that he would come to her in the night, dreaming that he would forgive her even though she’d treated him terribly.

When she woke, it was still dark out and she had no idea when the suns would rise. But one thing was clear, she owed Kirov an apology and she’d been a coward for too long.

Pushing from the bed, Lainey ran a hand through her tangled hair to try to make it a little more presentable, taking a deep breath to prepare herself. Then she opened her door and padded out to the living room, her heartbeat racing as she peered around the corner.

The fire was still going and the room was quiet. She saw movement out of the corner of her eye, her breath hitching.

But it was Vixron, returned from his short night of rest. Lainey wondered if Kirov had summoned him after their argument.

Her brow furrowed, disappointment sagging her shoulders.

“Tev, female? Do you need something?” Vixron asked, straightening.

“No, I was just…” Lainey trailed off. “I couldn’t sleep. I thought that Ambassador guy would still be here.”

Vixron studied her carefully before saying, “Ambassador Kirov was needed at the command center. I suspect he has much to finish before he leaves for Troxva later this afternoon.”

“I…I thought he was leaving tomorrow morning,” she said softly, her lungs squeezing.

“That was not my understanding when I spoke with him.”

“Right,” she whispered. She looked down at her bare feet and then around the living room, as if Kirov would appear out of thin air the longer she looked. She forced a smile and said, “I need some fresh air. I’ll be out on the terrace.”

She walked quickly to the door and slipped outside before Vixron could protest. Outside, she drew in lungfuls of cold air and immediately looked down the terrace, to where Kirov’s house was.

Disappointment threaded through her again when she saw his hovercraft was gone. Vixron hadn’t been lying when he’d said Kirov was at the command center.

Slowly, she wandered to the balcony, glancing next to her at the place Kirov had stood at when they’d talked, when she’d hurt him.

He was leaving. This afternoon.

Had he even planned on telling her? Had he planned on saying goodbye?

Something in her broke at that thought and more goddamn tears rolled down her cheeks before she dashed them away with her wrist.

Lainey let herself cry for a bit. Nadine had always said that it was good to cry, that it was quote unquote just as much of a release as an orgasm was.

She almost laughed, her sadness for the loss of her friend mingling with her guilt, with her cracking heart, and she cried.

It took a while for them to taper off. But when they did, Lainey knew Nadine had been right. She felt better, calmer.

“I can’t keep doing this,” she whispered to herself.

She couldn’t keep hurting people she cared about just because she was scared.

It was no secret that relationships were difficult for her. Her father had been absent most of her life, preferring to run his business over spending time with his family. Her mother had loved her on the condition that she performed well and only seemed to truly show her affection after the end of a concert, when other people were looking.

Her ex-boyfriends had been disasters, but looking back on it, Lainey knew she’d picked them for a reason…because she was certain those relationships would end, that she’d never risk her heart with them.

And Nadine. Nadine, who had been a sister to her, a best friend, a confidant. Her beautiful life and soul had been stolen by a lump in her breast, her body turning against her. Her death had left Lainey…empty. Detached.

After Nadine, she hadn’t opened herself up to anyone. She never put herself in a position to feel vulnerable.

Then her abduction happened, the Luxirians rescuing them shortly afterwards.

Then Kirov crashed into her life, unexpected but real.

And ever since, she’d been reeling.

Ever since, she’d been jerking him around, her emotions swinging wildly from one moment to the next but he’d kept up with her, he’d challenged her.

The moment she realized she might not want to say goodbye was the moment when he left her behind. The irony was not lost on her.

She couldn’t keep doing this.

Lainey needed to decide what she wanted and she needed to commit. And the two options were this: stay away from Kirov no matter how painful it would be until the Luxirians sent them back to Earth…or beg him for another chance and really give this thing between them another shot.

One option meant she could still go home to Earth with her heart—mostly—intact.

The other meant she had to be vulnerable, she had to open up and let him see all the ugly places inside her, and she would probably do the thing she feared most: fall in love.

Lainey stood at the balcony until the sky slowly began to turn a blush pink. She watched, in awe, as the twin suns began their ascent, casting beautiful, unearthly colors over the landscape, colors she didn’t even think possible.

A new day, she thought.

Clarity came with the sunrise.

She knew what she wanted to do.

* * *

Kirov wasin a foul mood and he stood, alone, in the technology wing of the command center, hunched over a table that held the armor he was creating.

He was nowhere near finished with it, would need to bring it with him to Troxva. Pain radiated from the base of his neck, a booming headache forming, frustration and anger and disappointment only making it worse.

He’d been in the technology wing for hours, since the dead of night. He’d needed something to distract him from what his female had told him or else he thought he might go mad.

His work was only frustrating him further. There was very little that Kirov couldn’t work out, that he couldn’t understand. Like the armor.

Like Lani.

Kirov growled, running both hands over his horns, straightening from the table. His eyes felt tired, strained. He needed sleep and food and…release.

“Kirov,” a voice came from the doorway.

Kirov turned to look at Vaxa’an. “How long have you been there?”

Vaxa’an didn’t move. “Long enough to know you are no nearer to completion.”

Kirov gritted his jaw, looking at the fragments of metal on the table which wouldn’t sync and perform properly once he inputted their coding into the Coms. Thousands and thousands and thousands of lines of code he’d tried.

Vaxa’an eyed him, frowning. “What has you like this? When you first told me of this project, I assumed it would be easy to complete.”

“I did too,” Kirov said. “I have been distracted lately. It is hard for me to find my focus.”

His Prime Leader and friend didn’t ask him why, thankfully, just studied him from a distance.

Kirov forced his gaze away from the table and asked, “What time of the span is it?”

“Late morning,” Vaxa’an replied. “Come with me. Cruxan is connected on one of the Coms with an update.”

Kirov’s breath hitched, dread pooling in his stomach. Had Cruxan found the crystal?

He was running out of time and Kirov was still at a loss about what to do with Lani, how to proceed with her. Because despite what she’d told him on the terrace last night, Kirov had no intention of giving up. Not until it was over.

And it wasn’t over. It never would be.

Kirov followed Vaxa’an to the war room, where he saw Cruxan on the screen of the Com.

Cruxan nodded his head at Kirov and addressed them both when he said, “I have a lead on the crystal.”

A slight relief went through Kirov. Cruxan hadn’t found it yet.

“And?” Vaxa’an asked. “Is it viable?”

“The warrior I questioned seemed sure that he knew who had taken it. He is here, at my outpost, and conveniently had been stationed at the command center during the theft, a warrior I questioned myself. I know where he is.”

Vaxa’an exhaled a short breath. “Good. Find it. And then return it to the Golden City immediately. I will not keep the human females waiting any longer than they already have.”

“Yes, Prime Leader,” Cruxan replied. “And the warrior responsible?”

“Bring him too,” Vaxa’an replied, his voice darkening.

Cruxan nodded in acknowledgment and then signed off the Coms, the screen fading.

Vaxa’an turned to Kirov. “It seems we will recover the crystal quicker than expected.”

Kirov’s mind raced. If Cruxan tracked down the crystal at his outpost before the end of the day and immediately left his outpost, he would arrive by tomorrow evening.

No doubt, Vaxa’an would send the females away the moment the crystal arrived safely.

He was out of time.

No, you are not, he thought, an idea that had been in the back of his mind forming.

Looking at Vaxa’an, Kirov resented that he would have to betray his friend’s trust.

But Kirov had warned him before. Kirov had told Vaxa’an the truth when he said if he found his fated mate, he would do anything to keep her.

Vikan had stolen his female away, from the command center, in the middle of the night. Vaxa’an had been furious and had gone after them, but by the time he reached them, Vikan had won his female.

Could Kirov do the same with Lani?

He was scheduled to depart for Troxva that day, earlier than expected, but could he truly betray Vaxa’an and steal Lani away, just like Vikan had?

Absolutely, he thought, thinking of his female. His loyalty was and always would be to her and their matehood. Vaxa’an would do the same if the positions were reversed.

Kirov drew in a deep breath, the plan forming in his mind quickly.

If he stole Lani and took her with him to Troxva, it would only buy him a couple spans. No doubt Vaxa’an would be right on their tail.

But it was more time.

Kirov would take it.

“You return to Troxva this afternoon?” Vaxa’an asked, shutting down the Coms.

“This night,” Kirov amended. “I still have much to prepare.”

“Very well,” Vaxa’an said. “If I do not see you, have a safe journey, brother.”

Guilt ate at him but his resolved hardened.

“Thank you, my friend.”