A Girl Named Calamity by Danielle Lori
CHAPTER ONE
THE TRUTH OF TWO SILVER CUFFS
Adraft and a tug on my wrist woke me from a fitful sleep. I sighed, rolling over on my pallet while expecting the morning sunrise and my grandmother’s berating voice. But no light shined through the small window, and the sight I saw instead, sent an icy chill down my spine.
A sick woman stood over me. Long blond hair, similar to mine, but stuck to her sweat-soaked face. She looked familiar as if I should have known her, but I was sure that I’d never seen her before. She would have been beautiful if not for the pallor of her skin and her thin body.
I let out a breath, trying to calm my drumming heart and scooted back a foot. She must be here to see Grandmother. I was about to shout to wake her, but the woman’s agonized moan did it instead as she hunched over in pain.
“What’s going on?” Grandmother hollered from her pallet in the corner. I looked the woman over, wondering what could be causing her so much pain when I realized she had one of my silver cuffs in her hands. My eyes immediately shot to my wrist, to check if what I saw was actually real. It felt as if I were naked as I stared at my bare wrist graced with a tan line. The sensation of having it off was freeing, and yet had apprehension rolling in my stomach.
The woman backed up, knocking a book off the table she was using for support and eyed the door. I wanted to tell her to take it and run, but after a second of deliberation, I changed my mind. Grandmother would be furious, but in reality, the woman didn’t look like she could walk let alone run.
I got to my feet to stand before the door. I glared at Benji, our black shepherd as he napped in the corner. He was a terrible guard dog.
“What in Alyria is going on, Cal?” Grandmother yelled, bothered enough that she got off her pallet to take in the scene. Her annoyed expression shattered into disbelief when she noticed the woman. Her horrified gaze moved from the cuff in the woman’s grip to my bare wrist.
Grandmother moved faster than I had ever seen before and ripped the cuff out of the woman’s hand. She slapped it back on me with so much force that I grimaced and rubbed my pained wrist.
“You idiot!” she screamed at the woman. I almost took a step back at her tone. Never had I seen her react like that. The woman was silent as she clutched her stomach, her eyes wide in agony.
As I watched Grandmother rush around the small cottage, grabbing different items on her tables, a nervous pit grew in my stomach. “Grandmother, what’s going on?”
She ignored me as she gave all her attention to a passage in one of her books, her finger traveling down the page frantically. She took some herbs she had in one of her jars and threw them into the fire. Her back was to me, and I heard her softly chanting, then silence.
The woman’s short breaths and the crackling of the fire in the hearth were the only sounds, the thick tension in the air leaving a cold sweat in its wake.
My attention was brought to the woman’s shivering form as she slid to the wooden floor.
“She really needs some help,” I said to my grandmother’s still but tense back. I didn’t know as much about healing as she did, or I would have taken a look at the woman. People from all over Alger came to Grandmother when they were sick. I’d learned a little from watching her here and there, but she had never taught me much like I always wished she would. I assumed it was because I didn’t have magic. My grandmother had a purpose here; I wasn’t so sure I did.
Grandmother treated anyone whether they could pay for it or not, and that was why my heart beat in confusion when she said, “I hope she dies for what she has done!” She finally turned away from the fire to glare at the woman.
“What is wrong with you?” I looked at her as if she were the grandchild, instead of the other way around. This had to be a dream. The whole situation was too strange to be real.
“I hope you are suffering, Reina! Because you have just put a death sentence on your daughter’s head!”
My mouth fell open as I looked at the sick woman. She was my mother? The woman I hadn’t seen in the twenty years I’d been alive? My grandmother never told me much about her, and my questions stopped long ago when I realized she was never going to be in my life. As a child I imagined a hundred ways I would get to meet her, but this had never come to mind.
What better way to say hello to your daughter for the first time than try to steal from her?
I forced a laugh down as I didn’t believe that was the reaction you were supposed to have. Even if there was a rule book, I didn’t think that this particular situation would have ever been listed. So, I stood still, gazing blankly into the fire while trying to ignore the dull ache in my chest.
My grandmother and mother only looked at each other for a moment, while unease seeped into my lungs. The silence was heavy and starting to suffocate me, but when I went to say something, Reina beat me to it.
“I’m sorry. I just need some money, and I will leave.”
“What, your fancy little job in the city’s not paying enough these days?”
My grandmother had never said much to me about my mother. But finding out that she had lived right in Alger, a small ride from the cottage caused a sharp ache closer to my heart than I would have preferred. I pushed away the pain, clenching my teeth to replace it with resentment.
“Mother, I’m sick. I can’t work anymore.”
The anger in my grandmother’s eyes faded as she took in the news. “You don’t look sick to me. You look like someone who’s smoked too much Midnight Oil and then ran out of money to continue.”
My mother tried to steal from me, so it wasn’t that unbelievable she was addicted to Midnight Oil. No, the unbelievable part was that my mother was a prostitute.
Or had been. I supposed she couldn’t work now; no one would risk it.
Midnight Oil was used in the brothels so the women could escape the reality of a strange man between their legs. It only had an effect on women, and I had never seen any villagers but prostitutes use it. I’d heard stories of it taking you away into a sunny field, where all you could feel was the warm sun and the long grass caressing your skin. The withdrawal was a painful experience; I had seen with my own eyes as Grandmother had treated many of the prostitutes from Alger’s symptoms.
I had always known I was a bastard. But now I knew I was a whore’s bastard.
That wasn’t exactly what had my stomach turning. There had been many prostitutes seeking help to ease the withdrawal symptoms who came through our warped wooden door, and every one of them was sick in an entirely different way.
There was no other reason for my mother to be out of work and coin unless she had the one sickness that put prostitutes out of business. The Pox. She didn’t appear symptomatic as there were no lesions on her skin. Those who showed symptoms died from them, and those who didn’t, lived.
Was it too early to see the symptoms? Or was my mother one of the lucky ones?
I watched her retch on the floor and felt as if I would be sick myself. Why would my mother choose that lifestyle? Was a whore’s life more exciting than a life of raising her daughter? Had my father just been another patron?
My eyes widened as Grandmother grabbed a leather bag and filled it with bread and a water canteen. She was going to send her away? Regardless of the way I felt about my mother, she still needed help. We’d never turned someone in need away before, and we wouldn’t start now. Besides, considering her current state, my mother wouldn’t even make it down the road.
“Grandmother, you can’t send her away.”
She gave me a forlorn look, her brown eyes softening. “I’m not sending her away, Calamity.”
My mother lifted her head, her brow furrowed. “You actually gave her that name?”
“I didn’t name her. You did, Reina,” Grandmother replied while putting a small blanket in the leather pouch.
My confusion couldn’t decide between why Grandmother was packing and what they meant with my name. I had always known it was strange. I thought Grandmother wanted me to be different; she had always been about teaching lessons. When one of the neighborhood girls had called me a tragedy, I shut her up with my fist. I learned a lot with the name; I wouldn’t change it now. I swallowed hard, my chest tightening. Knowing that my mother had named me after a tragedy was, surprisingly, the most painful truth of the night. I wanted to feel indifferent to it, but I couldn’t help but feel as though someone had just punched me in the stomach.
Reina weakly shook her head. “I wasn’t serious, Mother. I can’t believe you would do something like that. No, actually, I can. You were always unforgiving after Father passed.”
Oh, what a relief. She’d only been jesting.
“Don’t berate me. We can both see the mess you have made of yourself,” my grandmother told her before she looked at me. “Cal, put these on.” She shoved some clothes at me.
I lifted a pair of pants and a long cotton shirt. “Why on Alyria do you want me to dress like a man?”
“Because you must look like one.”
My grandmother’s riddles on top of being punched in the gut were not something I could handle simultaneously. “Stop being evasive, Grandmother. I’m not putting them on until you tell me why.”
She turned to me, her gaze serious. “They know where you are now, and you need to leave before they get here.” She tossed some tall leather boots at me, but I only glanced at them as my unease grew and I wondered about her health. The horse and now this?
“Have you been drinking too much of your medicinal tea, Grandmother?” I asked as she rummaged around her tables with jittery movements.
“This isn’t a time for jests. I’ve told you a thousand times: if one of those cuffs came off, something horrible would happen.”
I wanted to say that this wasn’t the best time for my mother to steal from me either. But I bit my tongue. “What? What’s going to happen?” It was the middle of the night; surely she couldn’t be serious about us going anywhere.
“We don’t have much time. Put the clothes on now! They could be scouting the area already.” Her voice was shaky, and I could feel her anxiety surround me like a cloak. She lifted a floorboard and grabbed a pouch out of the hole, then looked at me intently.
Her eyes narrowed when I didn’t move, and with a sigh, I pushed my thoughts aside and finally obeyed, slipping the pants on. I pulled my nightgown off and switched it for the linen shirt. I had never worn pants before, and they were awkward as the rough material chafed against the inside of my thighs. When did she even get these?
My thoughts were interrupted when Grandmother came at me with a knife. My heart jumped and I took a step back, putting my hands up to ward her off. “What are you doing!”
She grabbed at my hair, and I realized then what she was planning. I pulled my hip-length strands out of her reach. “No! You’re not cutting it. Your mind has obviously been addled with old age!”
A horse and insane ramblings were one thing; cutting my hair was completely crossing the line.
She tried to grab at it again. “You have to look like a man, Cal.”
“Okay!” I said. “I’ll braid it and tuck it into my shirt.” I only hoped that she would get far away from me with that knife. I’d never even seen a woman with short hair. And I wasn’t going to be the first.
She grabbed a black cloak and threw it at me. “Keep the cloak on, then. All of Alyria will see you coming with your flaxen head like a virgin to a sacrifice. It’s not safe for you to travel as a woman; you must take all costs for others to think you are just a man passing through. Don’t take the cuffs off either. That is how they can find you.”
My mouth dropped open when I realized she wanted me to leave alone. “Are you mad?”
“No,” she answered.
“Oh, no, you really are.” I shook my head, my heart beating in unease. “I’m not going anywhere.”
She didn’t even raise a brow at me while she double-checked what she had put in the pack. “You’re going. Otherwise, you’re as good as dead.”
A chill crawled down my back. What was she talking about? And how was I supposed to travel alone? I had never left Alger; I didn’t even know the basic direction to Cameron, the closest neighboring city. My chest tightened in fear, and I shifted on my feet. “Have you not heard the stories of travelers not coming home, Grandmother? And you want to send me out there alone?”
“You have a chance out there; you have none here. You will do what I say.”
Fear tasted metallic in my mouth, my heart rate uneven. “Why can’t you come with me?” I repeated the question. It seemed the most important one at the moment.
“Because they would know exactly who to track if I went missing. Everyone knows I live here, and I can’t leave an empty cottage. If I stay, I can keep them occupied for a while, and you can escape.”
My brows knitted. “Who? Who is coming?”
She stopped in front of me, her wrinkly face the only mother I had ever known. “Bad men, Calamity.”
“But why?”
“Ever since you were an infant and your mother brought you to my door, I knew you were special. You were soaked in magic, Cal. One only had to look at you to know. Your mother doesn’t have magic, and I was sure your father didn’t either. I couldn’t figure it out, so I took you to a seer in Alger.” She gripped my hands between her wrinkly ones. My heart beat fast as I waited to hear what she would say.
“Only you, Cal, can find where the magic is sealed, and you are the only one who can open it.”
I only stared at her blankly for many moments. Because she had officially lost it.
She gave me a reproachful look as if she knew of my thoughts. And then her eyes softened around the edges and my stomach took an uneasy dive. She squeezed my hand, and a cold chill ran down my arms as I saw the truth in her expression.
I swallowed hard and glanced at the table my mother was currently laid out in front of. She was too consumed with her pain to be aware of us. I never realized how true that was.
Why would I be able to find where the magic was sealed? Why would a farm girl be able to find something so important and yet so destructive if it was opened? I didn’t have any magic; my grandmother was wrong about that. I couldn’t even bring a pail of water back from the stream gracefully, and I was given the ability to open the seal?
“You are wrong, Grandmother,” I managed to finally say. She slowly shook her head, showing that she wished she were wrong, but she wasn’t. At least that’s what she believed.
“Anyone who wants the seal open will be looking for you. They could force you to find the magic and open it. The already powerful Mages would become more powerful. But those are the ones who will want you to find it. There will be some who would rather kill you than allow you to find it, Cal. That’s why it’s vital for you to leave. The cuffs protect you. It took two so that no one could sense where you were. Take one off, and anyone who wishes can find you. I wish I could explain more, but there isn’t time. You must get to Undaley City. They are good people and will protect you. Once everything settles down here, I can come find you.”
She dropped my hands and gave me the boots, but I didn’t take them. She narrowed her eyes and shoved them in my stomach. I complied but dawdled slipping them on, giving her time to rescind everything she’d said. When she never did, I let out a breath and braided my hair, tying a piece of leather at the end. My hands shook as I tucked the tail into my shirt. My grandmother’s anxiety was clouding the air in the small room and suffocating me.
I looked over at my mother’s sleeping form. Her face was scrunched up against the wooden floorboards, and a pile of vomit lay next to her head. My stomach rolled as I finally noticed the stench filling the cottage and found myself following my grandmother outside. Benji brushed past me, probably deciding he didn’t like the smell either.
Grandmother’s white nightgown blew softly in the breeze as she looked up at the dark sky. “See that star?” She pointed to a star several shades brighter than the rest. “It’s called the Star of Truth. If you have a destination in mind, that star will take you anywhere you need to go. And no, it has never worked to find the seal. You need a definite idea of where to go.” She silenced my question before I asked it. I’d hoped some of her story wouldn’t add up so that we could forget this and go back to sleep.
She walked to the small wooden stable while I continued to look at the bright star as if it would ground me here. When had my grandmother ever steered me wrong?
There was a battle being fought inside my head and a nausea churning in my stomach.
“Grandmother, I’m not leaving,” I blurted.
“You will do what I say.”
I sighed as I gazed up at the night sky. There I was, standing in men’s clothes as my mother who abandoned me lay sick on our cottage floor, and my grandmother prepared our horse while expecting me to travel across the country alone.
“I put a map in your pack in case you get mixed up during the day. You should head to Cameron City first. There are many men for hire there who could escort you to Undaley. I’ve put a substantial amount of money in your pack for this. It’s a ruthless city, Cal, so be very careful disguising yourself. An inconspicuous man won’t have an issue there,” she said as she proceeded to saddle our new horse. The purchase I hadn’t been able to figure out for the life of me.
But I understood now.
“You knew this was coming,” I said to the star-lit sky.
“I suspected, Calamity. A shift in the breeze warned me. This land is powerful, and it can tell you anything if you open your mind to it.”
“Why didn’t you take me to Undaley, then? Why make me go all alone?” She cast me a veiled glance but didn’t say anything. “Why—”
“Now, they will anticipate for you to go around the Red Forest and for that reason, you need to go through it.”
My jaw dropped, and I stared at my grandmother with wide eyes. I knew then that she was senile. “You have lost your mind!” I thought she couldn’t have shocked me more with this whole situation, but this was unbelievable. No one in their right mind would suggest traveling through the Red Forest at night.
She huffed. “Stop it, girl. I might have misplaced the sewing needle a few times, but that bugger is tiny. My mind is as clear as yours.”
“Clearly not! I wouldn’t ask anyone to go through the Red Forest at night unless they had a death wish.”
“Cal, you must go through it, or they might find you before you reach Cameron. They are tracking the area right now. I can sense it. You have so much magic, Cal. I don’t think the creatures will try to harm you. But if I’m wrong, this will come in handy.”
I stared at the knife in her hand with a grimace. A knife wouldn’t save me in the forest.
“If you are wrong, I’ll be dead, Grandmother.” She didn’t reply; she only handed me a leather belt. I stared at her and at it uncertainly until she gestured for me to put it on. I let out a breath and wrapped it around my hips and put the knife in the sheath.
“By the time you reach the Red Forest, it should be light, and you will be able to travel safely through. Everyone knows the creatures prefer to hunt at night.”
Trepidation ran down my spine. “They prefer. Maybe they will be too hungry to care what time of day it is,” I said, sarcasm, something much easier to focus on than fear. I slipped the cloak on to distract from my feelings and pulled up the hood. I swallowed nervously. “Do I pass as a man?”
Grandmother gave me the up and down and then frowned. “Not quite. Your breasts are too large. Maybe we should bind them? No, we don’t have time. Hopefully, no one looks more than a glance. Keep your head down.”
I let out a short, bitter laugh. This was a lost cause. And I couldn’t believe I was even contemplating it. I was supposed to ride away from the only home I had ever known on the words of my ageing grandmother? What if that seer who had told her I could open the seal was wrong? What if he wasn’t? I’d be endangering more than myself if I stayed. I couldn’t lose Grandmother. My stomach sank at the thought. She was the only person I had in my life, and I couldn’t bear to bring danger to her door.
“Keep your sleeves over the cuffs; they will create unnecessary attention. If they are seen, some might try to steal them like your darling mother. Stay on the road and be inconspicuous.” She gave me a nod. “Now get on your horse.”
I stalled as the seriousness of this rushed through me like icy water in my veins. It wasn’t as if I had anything here besides Grandmother. Truthfully, she was all I had. The neighborhood girls had grown up, gotten married, and already had children. And I only felt relief in the fact that I didn’t have to marry Braden, the blacksmith’s son. For some reason, I never had any desire for that. I was just waiting for something to happen in my life.
Maybe this is it.
Maybe I’d known this was coming all along.
“Grandmother . . .” I started in my last attempt to make her see reason.
“Cal, I wish it wasn’t so, but I’m telling you the truth. Get on your horse,” she ordered. Her eyes were full of determination, but I heard the crack in her voice.
I wrapped my arms around her slight but sturdy frame. An ache began to settle heavily in my chest, and I hadn’t even left yet.
“Promise you’ll come find me?” I asked, feeling like a little girl again when instead I was a woman who was supposed to be having her own children by now.
“I promise,” she whispered in my ear and gave me a squeeze. “You might not believe all this yet. But you will. Ask the land to show you your magic and it will.”
I nodded with suspicion, and let her go to look at Benji sitting by her side. “You’re a terrible guard dog,” I told him. He blinked his golden eyes at me. I didn’t pet him, because this wasn’t goodbye. That’s what I told myself; truthfully, it would have only made it harder to leave.
With a weight settling on my heart, I mounted my horse. I looked up at the Star of Truth and whispered for it to take me to Cameron City. The horse’s hooves hit the soft ground as I rode away from the comfort of our cottage.
I didn’t look back.