Breaking Ties by Elle James

Chapter 9

Dawg handedBeth out of the helicopter, knowing how exhausting the night had been. She stumbled and would have fallen if he hadn’t been there to help steady her. Together, they walked toward the camp.

Dr. Parker was waiting for them as the team ducked beneath the camouflage netting. Some of his teammates made a beeline for the shower facility.

Since Beth stopped in front of Dr. Parker, Dawg did, too.

“Any more casualties?” the doctor asked.

Beth shook her head. “No, sir.”

The man’s eyes narrowed as he studied Beth. “Are you all right?”

She nodded, her cheeks flooding with color. “I just need a shower and a good night’s sleep. Are our patients resting easily?”

The doctor nodded. “No complications, thus far.”

“That’s good. I’ll check in on them in the morning.” Beth smothered a yawn. “Right now, I’m way beyond tired.”

“Don’t let me stand between a woman and her bed,” Dawg said with a grin.

Jonathan’s brow furrowed as he watched her walk away. “Can I buy you a cup of coffee?”

Dawg was tired and wanted to hit the shower then bed. He smelled of smoke from helping villagers salvage belongings from their damaged homes. But he also wanted to know why the good doctor wanted to speak with him. “Sure.”

They walked to the dining area where a coffeepot was kept with a healthy amount of coffee grinds for those in the military to enjoy.

A carafe of coffee was already on the burner keeping warm.

Dr. Parker pulled out two cups from his cabinet and set them on the counter near the coffeemaker. He poured coffee into the two cups and set them on a table.

Dawg sat in front of one of the cups and lifted it to his lips.

Jonathan dropped onto the seat opposite Dawg and launched into the discussion. “I sense something happening between you and Lieutenant Drennan.”

Dawg tensed. He hadn’t expected the doctor to say anything like that, and frankly, he didn’t know what to say in response. “Excuse me?” he said to buy time while he digested the topic of the doctor’s conversation. “There’s nothing going on between the lieutenant and me. That would be against policy.”

The doctor nodded. “Precisely. Fraternizing while deployed can get you an Article 15, or worse, court-martialed.”

Dawg nodded. “I know the regs.”

“Good. I’d hate to see either one of you lose your careers because you didn’t know the rules.”

“I appreciate your concern, but there’s nothing going on between me and the lieutenant,” Dawg repeated.

“Even if we weren’t in theater, Army regs discourage relationships between officers and enlisted.” Dr. Parker gave Dawg a pointed stare.

Dawg dipped his head once. “I understand.”

“You both have very promising military careers,” the doctor continued.

Dawg set his cup aside, tired of the man beating around the bush. “Is there something you want to get off your chest, sir?”

Parker sighed. “I want the lieutenant to be happy, no matter who she chooses to spend her life with. She’s a special, giving person, who needs someone who can provide for her the life she so richly deserves.”

“I admit, I like the lieutenant,” Dawg said. “And I agree, she deserves happiness. But she has to make that determination of what makes her happy.”

“Or who.” Dr. Parker met Dawg’s gaze, his eyes narrowing.

“She would be the best judge of the who.” Dawg sat up straighter and wrapped his hand around his cup. “Sir, is that all you wanted to discuss?”

The doctor nodded. “It is. Your team did an admirable job tonight against overwhelming odds.”

“How’s Dash?” Dawg asked.

“He’s recovering nicely. We need to get him back to the States soon, so he can get his physical therapy started.”

“Thank you for taking care of him. My team is my family.”

“You need to make sure that’s not all the family you need. Your job takes you away a great deal of the time. It’s not much of a life for those left behind.”

Dawg’s lips curled slightly. “That’s so very true. It’s a major consideration in any relationship. But I’ve seen it work for some of my friends. It’s how you love your family when you’re with them that makes the difference.”

“Sometimes, even that isn’t enough when the distance and time are too great.” Dr. Parker pushed to his feet. “Get some rest, Sergeant.”

Dawg rose from his seat. “Yes, sir.”

The two men parted ways.

Dawg walked away from the camp, just far enough to get out from under the canopy so that he could see the stars.

Everything Parker had mentioned had gone through his mind on numerous occasions, leaving him with the same question…was he the right person for Beth?

Beth was an amazing nurse and a wonderful human. She cared about people and her friends.

And she was an incredible lover, full of passion and warmth.

If he truly cherished her, he’d want only the best for Beth. Was being married to the doctor the best thing for Beth?

He was an officer. That would keep things straight so far as the military was concerned. The man was brilliant as a physician and surgeon, according to what the medics and locals had to say. But was he as good at relationships as Beth wanted and needed?

Dawg was convinced he and Beth would be good together. They were both passionate in bed, but also about their work. Yet, when they were together, they were totally focused on each other, not the next mission or patient. That’s what she’d needed from her doctor-fiancé.

Had Dr. Parker come to his senses since losing Beth? Would he give her what she needed?

Should Dawg step back and let them figure it out without him interfering and adding to the confusion?

He shoved a hand through his hair and decided all decisions could wait until after he’d had a shower and a good night’s sleep.

One thing was certain, when he’d seen Beth held at gunpoint by the Boko Haram terrorist, he would’ve moved heaven and earth, and sacrificed his own life, to save her. Though they’d only been together for a short time, they’d discovered they had so much in common and had bonded over dogs.

So, they weren’t both in the medical field, and they both were deployed often. They at least knew what it meant to be a part of the military and understood they had signed up for that lifestyle.

The difference between Dawg and Dr. Parker was that Dawg knew when to focus on family over another potentially exciting assignment. If he’d had the choice between volunteering for another deployment or marrying Beth, he would’ve chosen marrying Beth. No question.

Dawg headed for his tent, grabbed his toiletries and hurried to the shower facility, which wasn’t much more than another tent with a single pipe connected to a water tank. The trickle of water and a bar of soap was enough to wash the dust and camouflage paint from his skin. He rinsed, dried off and slipped into PT shorts. When he stepped out of the shower tent, he almost ran into someone about to enter. He gripped that person’s arms to keep from bowling him over.

“Dawg,” a familiar voice said in the dark.

Beth.

His hands tightened on her arms. “Hey.”

“Hey,” she echoed.

The conversation he’d had with Dr. Parker rushed back into his mind. Dawg dropped his hands from her arms. “Going for a shower?”

She wore a robe, flipflops and carried a towel and her toiletries. “I’m hoping it will help me relax.”

He snorted. “That cold dribble of water? I doubt seriously it will relax you.”

“Well, being clean would go a long way toward making me feel better.” She looked up into his eyes. Starlight reflected off her irises. “You might be used to being shot at or held at gunpoint, but that was a first for me.”

“It might be a while before you get over it. Some never do.”

She nodded. “PTSD.” Beth reached out and touched his arm. “About earlier…”

“I shouldn’t have kissed you.” Dawg jumped in with everything Parker had said still weighing heavily on his mind.

Beth laughed. “I thought I was the one kissing you. But that wasn’t what I was going to say.”

Dawg frowned. “I meant I think it’s a bad idea to kiss while we’re deployed.”

“I was going to say thank you,” Beth said. “For being there when I needed you. And you’re right. We shouldn’t have. And I shouldn’t have initiated it.” She held up a hand as if swearing in court. “I promise not to initiate a kiss until we get back stateside.” Her smile lit the night, making Dawg’s heart pound harder.

“Do you want me to stay until you’re done?” he asked.

“That won’t be necessary,” Beth said. “You need to get some sleep. I’m headed that direction after my shower.” She turned toward the tent, stopped and turned back. “For the record, that kiss was every bit as good as the ones back in Texas. I don’t regret it in the least. It was totally worth the risk.” Then she ducked into the tent, leaving Dawg outside with his pulse pounding and with the urge to follow her into the tent, strip her naked and make love to her there in trickling, cold water.

He drew in a long, slow breath, held it and let it out in an attempt to get a grip on his desire.

Dawg wanted Beth to be happy. If it meant her going back to her doctor ex-fiancé, he’d be gracious and glad for her. But he’d be sad for himself. If he wasn’t already there, he was well on his way to falling in love with the pretty lieutenant. If he followed his heart, he’d pull out all the stops and woo her properly. But to truly love her, he had to do what was right for her. Dawg wasn’t sure he was her Mr. Right.

Beth spentthe next day taking care of their Special Forces patients and getting them ready to be airlifted to Landstuhl, Germany. Dash was already feeling better. The blood transfusion had helped to restore some of his energy. Time would take care of the rest.

The afternoon in the village hospital took even longer that day with folks coming to them from the village destroyed by Boko Haram the night before. The Special Forces guys went out to help salvage what they could and start the cleanup effort. Not all the villagers returned to rebuild. Some ended up in the temporary refugee camp that was becoming more permanent by the day.

By the end of the day, Beth was hungry and ready to put up her feet up and relax.

After one last check on the men in the Army field hospital, Beth emerged from the tent and stretched the kinks out of her back. She would never get used to sleeping on an Army cot. Not when her bed back in Texas was so soft and her feather pillow just perfect for shaping into anything form she desired.

With visions of food and sleep foremost in her mind, she turned toward her quarters only to be waylaid when a tall, dark-haired man stepped into her path.

Beth screeched to a halt and threw up her hands. “Geez, Dawg, you scared the crap out of me.”

“Sorry,” he said. “I wanted to catch you before you disappeared. Would you like to have dinner with me tonight?”

She frowned. “I thought we agreed not to see each other while deployed.”

“We agreed not to kiss and demonstrate any public displays of affection. But we still have to eat, so why not do it together? Besides, we need to talk.”

Beth’s frown deepened. She didn’t like the sound of his words. We have to talk didn’t bode well. It sounded like when she’d had the breakup talk with Jonathan. Her heart stuttered a few beats, and then kicked into high speed. They’d barely started going out when they’d deployed. Were the deployment and rank issues already getting to him? She hoped not.

The more she was with Dawg, the more she wanted to be with him.

“Okay,” she said. “When?”

“I’m ready now.” He held up two packages of MREs and two bottles of water. “I’m buying.”

She laughed. “I guess now is good.” Beth didn’t like lingering doubt. She was a proponent for ripping the bandage off, rather than prolonging the anticipation of pain.

When he turned away from the dining area, she had to hurry to catch up with him. “Where are we going?”

“To watch the sunset,” he said and led her to the western end of the Army camp where an Army green wool blanket lay on the ground, held down by several large rocks.

“You planned ahead,” Beth noted. “All we need now is wine.”

“And decent food,” Dawg added. “Have a seat. Your dinner will be served momentarily.” He pulled a knife out of the scabbard at his hip and tore into one of the packets. “You have a choice between barbecue and beef stew.”

“I’ll take the barbecue.” She probably wouldn’t eat much of it. Not if it meant delaying the talk. Her stomach would roil until he told her they were breaking it off. But then she could deal with it. Not knowing was the worst kind of pain.

“Good choice,” Dawg said, as if nothing in the world was wrong. Damn him for being so calm and collected when Beth’s world could potentially fall apart at any moment. She didn’t want things to end between them. Not now, or ever. They were perfect for each other. Or at least, she hoped they were.

They ate, talking about what had happened the night before and what could happen again since they’d stirred up the hornet’s nest by interfering with the activities of the Boko Haram.

Though she tried to act normal, Beth’s nerves stretched with each passing minute.

After they put away the trash into one of the empty packets, they stretched out to watch the sun dip below the horizon, a glorious ball of fire melting into the earth.

“So, what is it you really wanted to talk about?” she finally asked.

He stared at the horizon turning gray without the brightness of the sun. “I think you need to give Colonel Parker a second chance.”

Beth’s eyebrows shot upward. “What?”

Dawg sighed. “There had to be something there when you agreed to marry him. He regrets having volunteered for an assignment so close to the wedding. He knows what he did wrong, and he loves you.”

Beth shook her head slowly and shifted her gaze from Dawg to the horizon. “So, now you’re a marriage counselor?” She laughed. “Is this your way of dumping me? Because you don’t have to go through throwing my ex back at me. I can walk away, if that’s what you want.”

Dawg shoved a hand through his hair, making it stand on end. It also made him look even more adorable, which only made Beth angrier.

“I don’t want to dump you,” he said. “I like your company. We have so much in common, and I’ve never wanted to kiss a woman more.”

She crossed her arms over her chest and pinned him with her gaze. “I hear a but coming.”

He shrugged. “But it wouldn’t be right for me to come between you and your former fiancé. He still has feelings for you.”

“And what I want doesn’t count?” She challenged him with a glare.

“Absolutely. Colonel Parker made some good points, though.”

“Like?”

“Like, a relationship between the two of us would be difficult in the eyes of the Army, with you being an officer and me being enlisted.”

Her brow descended. “Did he threaten you?”

Dawg held up both hands. “No. Not at all. He just made some valid points.”

“What were the others?” she demanded, getting madder by the minute. How dare her ex-fiancé warn off another man?

“He knows how often Deltas get deployed,” Dawg said. “I’d be gone more than your doctor ever will be.”

“I never said I had a problem with him being gone. I had a problem that he chose to be gone over marrying me.” She shook her head. “Look, are you dumping me or not? I’d like to know if I’ll have a date when we get back Stateside.”

Dawg grinned. “If you decide not to go back to your ex, we’ll definitely have a date. If I haven’t screwed us up with this conversation.”

She narrowed her eyes. “I make my own decisions. No amount of pushing me in a certain direction will make me change my mind. Either you want to be with me, or you don’t. If you really want me to be with my ex, then I’ll assume you don’t want to be with me.”

Dawg’s grin broadened. “For the record, and for my own selfish reasons, I don’t want you to be with your ex. I want you to be happy. That’s all.”

“Then let me decide what will make me happy.” She sucked in a deep breath and huffed it out. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m mad, and I don’t want to take it out on you.” She stood, brushed the dust off her uniform and tipped her head toward the horizon. “Thanks for the food and the sunset. Next time, stop at that. I’m not going back to Jonathan.”

“He’s a good guy,” Dawg said. “I wish he wasn’t.”

“I know that,” Beth said. that fact had made it harder to end their engagement, because he is a good guy. “That’s not why I broke up with him. We want different things. That’s all.” She stared across the space between them, feeling like it was more than just inches.

Dawg reached for her but stopped when his hands were halfway there and let them drop back to his sides. “I want to hold you, to kiss you and reassure you that I’m not dumping you. I want to get to know you better, and mostly, I want you to be happy.”

“If Colonel Parker is warning you off me, we’d better keep our interactions on the up and up. Good night, Sergeant Masters.”

“Good night, Lieutenant Drennan.”

She wanted to say more but couldn’t. Not when her career could be at stake. If Jonathan suspected she and Dawg were having an affair, he could end their careers. She hoped that the man had enough feelings left for her that he wouldn’t. But that didn’t mean he wouldn’t make Dawg’s career a mess. Again, Beth didn’t think Jonathan would do that…but she couldn’t risk it. With a silent sigh, she turned and walked away. It was the only thing she could do.