How to Rope a Loyal Cowboy by Anya Summers
19
Morgan’s chest was constricting from the lacerating pain. How could he do that to her? Every day, she was here at Noah’s house, keeping the home fires burning. Yes, he paid her as the boys’ nanny. But it wasn’t as if they were married, and she had to go to the lengths she did. Besides, she helped out with the boys whenever he needed it.
In what little free time she was allotted, she’d scoured through accounting data to help him find the crook. That had been done free of charge because she loved him, and wanted to take care of him.
And how did he repay her generosity?
By making out with the thief, and playing tonsil hockey in his office with the bitch. Oh, how they must have laughed at her behind her back. Was it any wonder he hadn’t wanted it to be Kate? And it was likely why Kate had shown up here like she owned the place.
How long had he been screwing her behind Morgan’s back? Was that why he would only give her tidbits of himself? Just the other night, he had declared that she belonged to him. But he never once had said that he was hers.
It was beyond heartbreaking.
She loved him.
And he had paid her lip service. Enjoyed the willing body in his bed each night because she had offered, and was too inexperienced to understand the difference.
She was so stupid. She had thrown herself at him. What man wasn’t going to respond to a naked woman in their bed?
The boys were in the playroom. She could hear their peals of laughter as she packed. She couldn’t stay here, not after this. If she continued to live here and see him every day after his duplicity, she would become a shell of herself. Staying would only cause her heart to bleed out faster.
And yes, she was the damn fool idiot who had gotten involved with her boss.
“Morgan.” Noah’s voice boomed in the house as the garage door slammed shut.
She closed her eyes. She needed to face him, if only to tell him goodbye. It was going to hurt like hell. She’d thought losing her dad and her house had been the worst thing to ever happen to her. But she had been wrong. Losing Noah and the boys would gut her.
She swiped at the tears on her face.
She didn’t respond to him, shoving items into boxes, not paying attention to which box she put stuff into. But she heard his footsteps in the kitchen. He hadn’t stopped to take his boots off like he normally did.
“Dad, look at what we did?” Wade stated with excitement.
“Want to play with us?” Zack asked him.
“In a minute. I need to speak with Morgan, guys. Do you two think you could go in the playroom and occupy yourselves for the next thirty minutes? Then we can play. I was thinking we could build another indoor fort,” Noah said near her doorway.
“Hooray!” Wade exclaimed.
“We’ll get stuff ready, Dad!” Zack shouted with such enthusiasm, it made Morgan ache. Because she wouldn’t be here to see the finished product, to race with them through the constructed obstacle course and watch their little faces light up with joy.
And it took everything inside her not to crumple to the floor. She loved those two boys. She was going to miss them like she was cutting her arm off. She’d miss their cuddles, and silly antics, and belly laughs.
She sensed Noah behind her as she tossed more clothes into the box nearest her.
“Morgan, what you saw back there—”
“I really don’t want your flimsy excuses,” she stated, proud of herself for keeping her voice steady.
He gripped her and tugged her around. His face was inches from hers. “Well, you’re going to get one. There’s nothing going on between Kate and me.”
Yeah, right. She had eyes and knew what she had seen. She blew out a breath. “You expect me to believe that after what I just witnessed?”
“It’s the truth. Have I ever been dishonest with you?” Noah’s hazel gaze searched her face.
No, he hadn’t, that she knew of, but her father had kept things hidden from her too. Who was to say that Noah wasn’t doing the same? And while she realized that her pops keeping all that stuff hidden had made her wary when red flags were raised, who wouldn’t feel that way?
“I know what I saw, Noah. You weren’t shoving her away.”
“Morgan, I care about you, you know this. You wouldn’t be in my bed otherwise.”
He cared. She loved. And therein lay the difference.
“So, you’re just going to leave and run away the moment things get difficult?” he snapped.
“I don’t think this is working out well. I think the best thing for me to do is to go,” she said, because if she stayed, she would always doubt whether she was simply convenient or not. He wanted her, that much was true, but he didn’t love her.
“Just like that?”
“What do you want from me?” She tried to yank herself out of his arms, but his hands were like steel bands around her biceps.
“I want you to stay. I want things to go back to normal between us,” Noah stated, searching her face.
“How’s this for your normal? I love you, Noah.”
He flinched and released her so fast, she stumbled back. He shook his head and stared at her with pity and fear in his eyes. “Morgan… I…”
Disappointment shattered her.
“Yeah. I get that you are emotionally unavailable and clinging to your dead wife’s ghost. Got it,” she snapped, and went back to packing her things.
“Careful, sweetheart.”
Morgan exploded, fighting back tears. “Or you’ll what? I can’t do this anymore, Noah. Today, seeing you with Kate drove home that while I might love you, I’m just convenient for you. And that one day you’ll move on to someone like her, more experienced, more everything than me. I think it’s better for everyone involved if I go now.”
“And what about Wade and Zack? They love you.”
“I know. I love them too. But I can’t be around you right now. I don’t want to leave them.”
“So don’t. Stay. Morgan, please sweetheart, we can fix this.”
“No. We can’t. The thing is, I don’t give my emotions freely. Even if we decided to stop the nightly booty calls and retreat to our rooms alone each night, seeing you every day would slowly decimate me until I finally caved and ended up back in your bed, because I love you. And I would be living half a life as someone who is convenient for you because I’m here. I’m not saying you don’t care. But it’s not enough. I wish it was, but it’s not.”
“So that’s it?” he snapped, setting his hands on his hips. His entire being was dialed to pissed off alpha.
“Noah.” She sighed.
He yanked her into his arms and crushed his mouth over hers. For a moment, she caved, kissing him back with all the love and need in her heart. How could she not? She wanted this man forever.
But all he wanted was a warm body.
Morgan ripped her mouth away and shoved at his chest. “Let me go.”
She couldn’t stop the tears. Her heart was breaking, shattering into a million pieces. Noah released her. They stared at one another.
And she could see it: he wanted her. He truly did. But that wasn’t enough for her anymore.
“I’m sorry. I wish I could stay,” she said through her tears, and turned to flee.
In the doorway to her room, Wade and Zack stood with tears running down their little faces. The moment her gaze landed on them, they ran to her.
“Don’t go,” Wade cried, and threw his little arms around her legs. Zack followed suit.
“We love you,” Zack sobbed.
Her tears fell fast and furious as she hugged them. “I love you both so much. Please don’t ever think I don’t. I’m so sorry, but I have to go.”
The boys tried clinging to her. She sobbed as she removed their arms from her legs. “I’m so sorry, guys.”
She shot Noah a teary glance as he knelt and pulled each crying boy into his arms. “I’ll be back for my things later. I’ve got to go.”
Morgan grabbed her purse and keys. She hadn’t realized that heartbreak could be so painful that she felt it physically. Noah didn’t say a word as she left. He just glowered at her, his gaze like sharp, piercing daggers.
Outside in her truck, it took her a few tries just to get the key in the ignition as the tears fell so fast, she was blinded by them. She backed out of the drive and sped away, with no clear destination in mind… until finally her tears were flowing too fast, and she couldn’t see.
Morgan pulled to the side of the road and wept with her face in her hands, great wracking sobs, as it felt like her heart had been ripped from her body.
There was a sharp knock on her door. She lifted her face and almost screamed at the man standing just outside her car door wearing sunglasses. He was as tall as Noah but even more built, with inky black hair and sporting a beard, in a shirt and cargo pants. Beside him was a huge black German Shepard.
“Morgan, honey, is that you? It’s Duncan.”
She rolled the window down, swiping the tears from her face.
“Hey,” was all she could muster.
“What’s wrong, honey?”
“I need… to speak with Bianca. Do you know where her and Maverick’s cabin are?”
“Sure do. Why don’t you let me drive you?”
“Oh, if you could just tell me—”
“Honey, I’m not going to leave you in distress like this until I know you’re somewhere safe. Scooch over and let me drive. Sampson can ride in the back.” He whistled to his dog. The big guy wasted no time getting into the bed of her truck.
Duncan opened her door and jerked his chin. Morgan didn’t have any energy to argue. She slid across the seat. Duncan climbed inside and took over driving. She sat with her arms wrapped around her torso, unable to stop the tears from slipping down her face.
But at least Duncan didn’t press her for information, or try to get her out of her crying jag. He just let her silently weep as he drove them past the stables and hotel, on back past cabins for tourists that were all occupied. And she was doubly glad she had given him the okay when they pulled into Maverick and Bianca’s driveway. She never would have found this cabin.
When he pulled her truck to a stop and shut the engine off, his dog, Sampson, jumped the truck and raced up the steps then scratched and woofed at the front door, like he had been there before.
Maverick opened the door as Duncan alighted from the truck. Maverick studied his friend and then Morgan, in the passenger seat of her truck.
“Hey bud.” Maverick scratched the dog behind the ears. “What’s going on?”
“I found her by the side of the road. She was trying to get to Bianca. Is she home?” Duncan asked Maverick.
Maverick nodded and shouted over his shoulder, “Babe, you’ve got a visitor.”
Bianca came outside with splotches of paint on her clothing, like she had been interrupted while painting. But she looked at Morgan curled in the passenger seat, and rushed over.
“Oh honey, what’s going on?” Bianca said, opening the door.
And Morgan lost it, blubbering as she spilled out her tale of woe and heartache. Morgan found herself with Bianca’s arm around her, being escorted into the cabin, and heard Maverick say to Duncan, “We’ll take it from here. Does Noah know?”
“I figured Sampson and I would stop by his place on our way back.”
“Why don’t you take her truck back over to Noah’s? I can get her home when the time comes,” Maverick said.
But then the front door shut, and Bianca was steering her to have a seat. Morgan let her, too weepy and heartbroken to do more than follow.