Scrooged by Vi Keeland

Margo

Nancy and I were sitting on the steps of the courthouse, waiting. I lifted my chin to the coffee truck at the corner that we’d just bought two coffees from. “I dare you to go inside and start taking orders.”

The owner had stepped out a minute ago to run into the store across the street. He hung a sign that said Back in Two Minutes, but a line started to form as people waited for him to return.

“Oh my God. I could get arrested.”

“Good thing you’re a lawyer, then.”

She gulped back the contents of her Styrofoam coffee cup and stood. “I guess I owe you one since the kissing bandit never called you.” She sighed. “I had such high hopes for him.”

Her and me both. I’d checked my phone every hour for the days that followed that amazing kiss. I thought for sure hot coffee guy would call me—the chemistry had been off the charts. At least I’d thought so. But the jerk never did.

I watched as Nancy approached the food truck, looked around, then slipped inside. A few seconds later, she had a little notepad in her hand and waved to me from the window as she took her first order. I couldn’t stop laughing watching her make coffees and collect money from people. Although my cackling came to a halt when I heard the owner yelling from across the street. He held out a hand to stop cars from crossing, nearly getting himself run over.

“Shit.” I stood.

Nancy disappeared from the window just as the owner ran around to the back of the truck. By the time I got to them, she already had the situation under control.

“Thanks, Ahmed.” She leaned forward and kissed the man’s cheek.

He groaned and climbed into his truck. “You stay in courtroom. Keep out of truck!”

I laughed. “What the hell happened?”

She shrugged. “Nothing. I told him I was a solo practitioner like him, and we had to stick together and help each other out.”

“I swear. Only you could have me hysterically laughing on the day I’m coming to court for my final divorce proceeding.”

Nancy looked at the time on her phone. “Shit. We better get going. Judge Halloran is a stickler for time.”

The security line to get inside was a mile long. Guess everyone decided today was a good day to get divorced. Nancy went through the attorney line so that she could at least be there when the case was called. It took me a solid fifteen minutes until I made my way to the right courtroom on the second floor. The door was closed, and when I opened it, the judge looked right at me. I froze in place, and every head swung in my direction. It felt like a blaring record came to a screeching halt. I thought perhaps I’d walked into the wrong courtroom, but that was definitely our judge sitting up on the bench.

“Can I help you?”

“Ummm. Yes. I mean…I’m supposed to be in here…with my lawyer, for my case this morning.”

The judge took off his glasses. “And what time is your calendar call?”

“Calendar call?”

He sighed and looked over at where Nancy was standing. “Miss Lafferty? Did you or did you not inform your client that my court starts at 9:30?”

“Yes, Your Honor. I apologize. The security line was pretty long this morning.”

He put his glasses back on and lifted a paper. Nancy caught my eye and motioned for me to get to her table fast. The judge didn’t bother waiting for me to take my place. He started reading some legal mumbo jumbo as I did my walk of shame. Approaching the gate that separated the players from the spectators, I made the mistake of looking on the other side of the courtroom. My soon-to-be-asshole-ex-husband flashed a phony smile. Such a dick. But it was the man standing next to him that made me lose my focus.

And…apparently I needed that focus to put one foot in front of the other. Because as I pushed the little wooden gate open, I lost my balance and tripped.

Shit.

Sprawled out on my ass, I looked up. The judge did not look amused.

The man whom had been the cause of my distraction crouched down next to me and extended a hand to help me up.

I couldn’t believe my eyes.

The Adonis from the coffee shop.

The asshole who’d never called.

Was apparently, Rex’s lawyer.

I knew his attorney’s name: Chester Saint. Never apparently knew he went by Chet. I had so many questions. Did he not know it was me that day? Or had he been playing some kind of evil game?

He whispered in my ear as he helped me up. “I guess the joke was on me. Karma’s a bitch, isn’t it?”

Flustered, I stood. Chet—the Kissing Bandit, Esquire—returned to his table, yet I continued to stand there staring at him, dumbfounded. The judge sighed again loudly. “Ms. Adams? If you’re not injured, could you possibly take your seat? I think you’ve made your grand entrance at this point.”

I blinked a few times and looked over at Nancy. She gave me a look that said get the hell over here, you idiot.

“Ummm. Of course. Sorry about that, Your Honor.”

The judge continued. “Mr. Saint? Why are you requesting a continuance today? This is an uncontested divorce, and the asset settlement seems to be in order.”

Mr. Saintrose and buttoned his jacket. “Your Honor, we’ve only just recently found there is a potential discrepancy in the valuation of Ms. Adams’ assets, and we need a little bit of time to further investigate the matter.”

The judge looked at Nancy. “I take it this is acceptable to you?”

“No, Your Honor.”

The judge mumbled, “Of course not.”

Nancy motioned to the defendant’s table. “I only received the Motion to Continue five minutes ago, when you did, Your Honor. As far as we’re concerned, there is no issue on asset valuation. My client and Mr. Adams came to an equitable agreement in good faith.”

The judge looked over at the other table. “What seems to be the issue, Mr. Saint?”

“We’ve been made aware that Ms. Adams has an undisclosed bank account with a substantial sum of money.”

I craned my neck out past Nancy to get a good look at my ex. “What? What money? You spent everything we had on that little tart you hired as your secretary—who couldn’t type or answer a phone, but apparently had other skills that met your hiring criteria.”

Nancy shushed me.

The judge wasn’t as polite. “Ms. Adams. Aside from being on time in my courtroom, you’ll also keep quiet unless asked a direct question. Do you understand?”

“But…” Nancy put her hand on my arm, an unspoken warning. I sucked it up. “Yes, Your Honor.”

“Since today has been so much fun, let’s do it again.” The judge put on his glasses and looked down. “Motion for Continuance granted. We’ll reconvene three weeks from today.” He looked up over the bridge of his glasses. “And be on time, Ms. Adams.”

My head was spinning. I had no idea what had just happened. Hot coffee shop guy is my ex’s lawyer, and I have hidden assets?

I turned to Nancy. “What the hell?”

“I was about to ask you the same question.”

Mr. Saint approached our table with his client and spoke to only Nancy. “We’ll need information on the co-owned TD accounts.”

She looked to me. “TD accounts? I don’t have any accounts at TD Bank.” Then it hit me. I glared at Rex. “You mean Nana’s accounts? You know those aren’t really mine. They’re only jointly titled so that I can go to the bank for her since she’s been sick.”

Rex said nothing while his attorney glared at me. “We’ll need those accounts by the end of the week.”