Demon Discord by M.J. Haag
Chapter Eight
Givingthem a chance meant movie time. And since I sat between the two, I got to hold the bowl of popcorn. It wasn’t some microwaved stuff but honest to goodness theater popcorn with the salt and oil and everything. And I couldn’t stop snacking on it as we watched the animated movie Groth had picked.
I shifted my position and tucked my cold feet underneath me, careful not to spill the popcorn. Azio and Groth would help themselves to a piece every now and then, but they didn’t eat nearly as much as I did.
Between the cartoon playing on the screen and the food at my fingers, I was relaxed enough that I didn’t overthink my moderately sandwiched position.
“Jessie told Byllo that fish are not smart enough to talk here. We can still eat them,” Groth said.
“We don’t kill smart things,” Azio added.
They’d been making commentary since they’d lured me to the couch with popcorn. I didn’t mind the conversation. It was insightful hearing how the fey thought. Or, more importantly, the direction of their thoughts, which revolved around feeding me and helping me not be afraid of them.
“See? Not all creatures with sharp teeth are bad,” Groth said.
A few moments later, that changed onscreen, and Groth cringed. Hiding my smile, I consolingly patted his knee.
“That doesn’t mean you’re wrong. The shark just made a mistake.”
He glanced at my hand on his knee, and I quickly removed it.
“Sorry.”
“Kindness deserves no apologies,” Groth said. “You’re the first female to touch me. Thank you.”
“You’re welcome?”
Azio chuckled beside me at the confusion in my voice.
“You don’t see it as the gift it is. You will.”
Rather than sort out what he meant, I focused on the movie. By the time it finished, I’d eaten all the popcorn, and lunch was the last thing on my mind. Yet, it was on Azio’s.
“Come. I will make your midday meal.”
I stood and followed him to the kitchen.
“Honestly, I’m not that hungry right now.”
“Popcorn is a snack. Not a meal. Jessie told Byllo. You need to eat a variety of healthy food, or you will get sick.”
I slowly sat at the table and watched him move around the kitchen with determination.
“If you really want to feed me, I’m not going to argue.” I doubted I would ever be able to argue with him.
“What kinds of foods do you like to eat?” he asked.
“All kinds. I’m not picky.”
“Were you picky before the hellhounds came?”
“Maybe, but in a different way. I wanted to eat whatever I was craving at the moment.”
He paused opening a can of soup and looked up at me.
“What are you craving now?”
“Now? Nothing, really. I’m too full of popcorn. It was too good to stop.” I smiled at him because he’d been the one to make it for me. He didn’t return my smile. Instead, he grunted and went back to opening the can of soup.
I was still wrapping my head around the fact that I wasn’t leaving in a few hours. That this would be my home now. With two fey. It wasn’t as terrifying a thought as it had been when I’d arrived.
In short order, the three of us were eating together at the table. It was as quiet as meals back in Tenacity but not as rushed.
“I’ve noticed some things and was wondering if I could ask a question that might sound judgmental but isn’t meant that way,” I said after a few swallows of soup.
“You may ask us anything,” Azio said.
Groth grunted in agreement.
“Every time I’ve been here, Groth’s watching T.V., and you’re never in any hurry to leave. Do either of you have jobs or do something during the day?”
They were both silent for a moment.
“We help with supply runs when it’s our turn. If Drav asks for volunteers, we volunteer. Sometimes we watch the other females learn to fight.”
I could tell by the way Azio spoke, he was trying to think of more.
“I watch movies to learn human culture,” Groth said.
It was on the tip of my tongue to tell him that cartoons weren’t a great representation of that but stopped myself. Most of the animated movies still had lessons about kindness, friendship, and being helpful. Those weren’t bad traits to instill in men who liked ripping off heads.
“Back in Tenacity, I was the house cook for breakfast and dinner. I spent my time in between meals trying to trade for additional food. I was just curious what I’ll be doing here to keep busy.”
“Anything you want to do,” Azio said.
I’d been afraid of that answer. I tended to think a lot when I was idle.
We spent the rest of the afternoon watching more movies. They were entertaining enough, but my mind kept drifting to Wayne and how he’d treated me. Or how I’d treated him. Had I been bitter and thrown the vasectomy in his face? Not intentionally. But I hadn’t ever managed to make peace with it. Part of me thought maybe I should have. Then I would wonder why I thought my feelings on the matter should count less than his.
Round and round my thoughts went, dwelling the longest on the uncertainty of my future. How long until the fey tired of my company? Would it be smarter to offer to have someone’s baby now instead of waiting until the moment they decide to kick me out?
I caught myself spiraling in guilt, regret, and fear and forced myself to pay attention to what Groth and Azio were saying about the movie.
By the time the sun set and the wall lights turned on, I needed a better distraction and asked if I could make dinner. There were more packages of meat in the freezer, one of which I set to thaw for the next day.
Cooking with both of them watching my every move wasn’t as nerve-wracking as it could have been. They peppered me with questions about what I was doing and why I was doing it. Especially when I started using the spices they had in the cupboard. It turned into a mini cooking lesson that I thoroughly enjoyed.
I was no master chef by any means, but I knew how to spice up most dishes to make them taste better. Azio and Groth seemed to agree when they took their first bites.
After another quiet meal together, I did the dishes with Azio’s help then excused myself for an early night.
Alone in the relative darkness of my room, I thought I would dwell on everything that had happened to me. Instead, the combination of a full belly while snuggled in a warm and comfortable bed immediately pulled me under.
Wayne plagued my dreams. In one, he held me lovingly while telling me that he no longer wanted me as his wife. The contradiction between his actions and his words tore at me. The dreams grew steadily worse until the final one where he promised we’d be a family then threw our baby out the window.
Ripped from the dream, I sat up, heart thundering, unable to shake the anguish I felt for that imaginary child.
“It was a dream,” a voice said softly from the dark. “You are safe, Terri.”
I placed Azio’s voice before I saw his shadow in the doorway.
“Did I wake you?” I asked, struggling to calm down.
“No. I haven’t slept yet.”
I exhaled heavily and rubbed a hand over my face.
“Do you dream when you sleep?”
“Yes.”
“Do you ever have bad ones?”
“Many.”
“I hate those kinds. I’d rather have the good ones.” I scooted myself back, so I was sitting against the headboard.
“What are your good dreams?” he asked.
I opened my mouth to answer, but before I could, another thought struck me. The door hadn’t been open when I’d gone to bed. I’d made sure to close it. And lock it.
“How did you open my door?”
“With my hand?”
His confusion only increased mine. I had locked it. Hadn’t I?
“Okay. Why did you open my door?”
He remained quiet.
“You told me you wanted me to give you a chance to be less scary. I’m trying to figure out what non-scary purpose you had for coming into my room in the middle of the night.”
“You were very quiet. I needed to see you.”
“Were you worried I’d left? In the middle of the night?”
He grunted, and I couldn’t tell if he was agreeing or just making noise.
“That would be the same level of stupidity as trying to shoot one of you. I’m not that stupid.”
“You’re not stupid at all. You’re beautiful.”
His words were equally worrisome and flattering.
“You do know that how someone looks has nothing to do with how smart they are, right?”
He grunted again, and I was beginning to think he did that when he disagreed with what I was thinking but didn’t want to say so. Instead of finding it annoying, it amused me.
“Well, I promise never to sneak off in the middle of the night. Does that put your mind at ease?”
He gave a very human shrug.
“What would put your mind at ease?” I asked, trying to find a compromise.
“If you slept with the door open.”
“I closed it to feel safer.”
“I will keep you safe.”
A snort almost escaped me since I’d closed the door to keep myself safe from him.
“I’d feel more comfortable and sleep better if the door was closed.”
He grunted again and reached up to rub the back of his neck.
“Will you tell me about your good dreams?” he asked hesitantly, bringing us back to his original question.
Unwilling to push my point and upset him, I let go of his invasion of my privacy.
“Now, my good dreams are usually about the past. Simple moments that I’ll probably never see again, like going to work and talking with co-workers. Grocery shopping.” My heart started to flutter, and I forced myself to say the final one. “Having kids.”
He tilted his head, and although I couldn’t see him clearly, I felt studied.
“How many children do you want?”
“As many as I can have,” I said honestly. “I know it’s not safe. There are no doctors to help with complications and things out there that want to eat anything that moves. My head knows that. But my heart just wants a family.”
“But not with your human man.”
I shook my head slowly, feeling sad and bitter and scared.
“No. Not with Wayne. He made it clear years ago that he didn’t want kids.” I drew my knees up to my chest and picked at the blanket covering me. “In a way, it’s a relief he told me to leave. Maybe now I have a chance, you know?” I wasn’t sure if I was convincing Azio or myself that it was a good thing.
“You still miss him.”
“I was with Wayne for years. Since high school. He was familiar. It’s easy to miss what was familiar. But that doesn’t mean we were right or happy together.”
“And you want to be happy.”
“Doesn’t everyone?”
Azio grunted again, softer, and reached for the door.
“Sleep, Terri. You are safe.”
He closed the door, leaving me alone. Oddly, I didn’t feel safer, just lonely and sad.