The Guardian by Diana Knightley

Seventeen - Kaitlyn

Lizbeth knocked on my room door. “Kaitlyn, I am headed tae Madame Sophie’s room, ye said ye wanted tae help with her hair and dress?”

I was again reminded how much I wished for a coffee maker in my room. I got dressed as fast as I could and rushed to Madame Sophie’s room, arriving just before Hayley.

Sophie was sitting on a stool in her shift, with Lizbeth and Emma working on her hair. We sent a maid down for food and then we all talked and teased while she dressed.

Hayley asked, “What was your first husband like?”

She said, “He was a man like most others: auld, resolute, and firm.”

Hayley joked, “Well, firm is good, I suppose.”

I said, “Hayley, she is going to think you’re wicked.”

Hayley said, “God-fearing Christian women want a firm man in the bedroom just like anyone else.”

Sophie’s eyes went wide.

I said, “Don’t mind Hayley, she has a mouth on her, it’s a travesty.” I stuck my tongue out at Hayley and pulled Sophie’s laces tighter. “This is a beautiful dress.”

“Aye, I had it made just before my husband passed.”

Lizbeth said, “How come ye daena hae any bairns?”

She said, “I daena ken... None will come.”

Lizbeth said, “Were ye yer husband’s first wife?”

“Nae, he had another...”

“Did he hae a bairn with his first wife?”

Sophie’s chin trembled. “He had three sons, they were all older than I.”

Lizbeth arranged a curl on her forehead. “So ye are barren — does Master James ken it?”

Her face grew so flushed I thought she might faint away. “He kens I... I told him I daena hae a bairn... I daena...”

I said, “If you told James you were married before and that you don’t have children now, I’m sure he understands what you mean by that.” I said it though I wasn’t sure he actually would know what that means in a world of no birth control.

I wondered, did James want children? But it might not have been Sophie, it might have been the husband. He had been old, whatever that meant.

Lizbeth said, “Never mind ye then, I am sure, as Kaitlyn said, that Master Cook understands.”

Tears welled up in Sophie’s eyes. She said, “I am so worried on it. I hae nae dowry or contract, what if I canna perform m’wifely duty? What if he daena like me?” She began to really weep.

Hayley said, “Honey, take it from me, if you want kids you can figure it out, there’s adoption, there are fertility clinics—”

I shot Hayley a ‘shut up’ look, and said to Sophie, “This conversation is too practical: dowries and bairns and duties, and it’s too late. This is not what you should be thinking about right now. James wants to marry you.” I squeezed her arm. “He wants to marry you more than anything. I don’t think he’s given a thought to contracts or duties.”

Madame Sophie began to ugly cry. “But what if he changes his mind? What if he decides he wants a contract, I hae nothing. What if he sends me away? I hae naewhere tae go! I daena ken what I would do! They would hae me tried as a witch without a friend tae stand for me!”

Lizbeth stepped away with her hands up. “Och, Madame Sophie, I daena believe I hae the sensibility tae help a bride dress. I am too practical. Ye must ken, if a man plans tae meet ye at the church, tis enough. He will bind his life tae yours and however that unfolds, tis God’s plan for ye. Ye canna cry over it, the chapel is beckoning.”

I dabbed at Sophie’s eyes with a handkerchief and said, “And the truth is I think every bride cries on her wedding day.”

Hayley joked, “Not me, I didn’t cry, it rained torrents, and I didn’t cry at all.”

I said, “Hayley, you get my point, it’s frightening. We all go through it, but he’s waiting for you in front of the altar. That’s what you focus on.”

Lizbeth said, “Och, ye young women marry for love, us auld women hae tae marry with contracts and our father deciding it all.”

I said, “First off, you are not so old, Lizbeth. Second, don’t listen to Lizbeth, Sophie. Lizbeth married her Liam because she greatly liked the look of him, and he made her flush red when he looked at her across the room. I saw it with my own eyes.”

Lizbeth said, “Kaitlyn is correct in this — I married my Liam because I wanted tae and dinna worry much on anything else. I kent he liked me and I kent he would be true tae his word. Ye must trust Master Cook tae honor his word tae ye.” She brushed Sophie’s shoulders. “Ye desperately need a husband, and ye hae found one.” She cocked her head tae the side. “If a woman is clever, and a man is honorable, it can be acceptable for them tae form a marriage without dowries or contracts, right, Kaitlyn?”

“Absolutely.”

Lizbeth said, “And ye are verra clever, Madame Sophie, ye are a woman who studies the stars. I think ye will ken what ye want upon the earth. And I hae seen James look upon ye, with a gleam in his eye. Ye hae given him a purpose and ye shouldna worry on anything else. Now wipe yer tears, Madame Sophie, and let us look ye over.”

We all stood back.

I said, “You look really beautiful, right, Lizbeth?”

“Aye, she looks beautiful and wise. James is going tae be a verra fortunate man.”

We all led Madame Sophie down to the family chapel.

* * *

James met us in the courtyard and took both of her hands. “You look gorgeous, Sophie, I am a lucky man.”

Hayley and I nudged each other with wide eyes.

“Thank ye.” She lowered her eyes demurely and we all went into the church.