The Guardian by Diana Knightley
Nine - Hayley
Fraoch and I rode for about six hours, with a short rest for lunch, but then my ass would go no farther. We came to an idyllic stream, dismounted, and built camp. When we were done we had a modern tent nestled in the grass near a lovely glen, a perfect little spot.
We took off our shoes and splashed in the water, washing our faces and feet, and Fraoch jokingly saying, “Because I love m’bhean ghlan, I will also wash m’balls tae make them ‘bearable’.”
I laughed and said, “Thank you, and for you my husband...” I lifted my skirts and splashed ice cold water between my legs with a shriek. “Cold!”
We built a fire to make dinner as the sun was going down. “It’s like a second honeymoon,” I said. “We could stay here all day tomorrow and just mess around.”
“Och aye, tis verra romantic, with the fish in the stream calling tae me,” he joked.
“Fine, you can dream of fishing all you want, but guess what I would do if you actually did go fishing?”
“What would ye do?”
“I would go into this little tent here beside the stream, in this little glen of romance, and I would play with myself without you.”
His eyes went wide. “Och, I would hate tae miss it, I daena think twould be fair.”
I shrugged playfully. “Fair or not, I would appreciate some attention, and I am much better than a fish.”
“Tis true, yet — what if we are tae starve, m’bhean ghlan? Could I be the kind of man who can fish for yer dinner, feed ye nicely, and then give ye the attention ye require?” He stretched his legs out beside the fire. “Ye would be the kind of wife who would rather be hungry in the tent by herself?”
“Ha! I didn't think about it that way, good point. Yes, I would like a full stomach too, but see, that is why I am a modern woman: I love when you fish for me, obviously, you’re adorable, manly, and you provide for me very nicely, but also, sometimes, like now, with the tent right beside us, beckoning, I think it might be nice to go by McDonald's and grab a meal for the quickness and ease of it. So that you have time to spend on my attentions. What I mean is that sometimes my attentions are priority over my stomach.”
“Och I ken it, Hayley, I live with the same thing every day.”
“That’s why we are so perfect together, you get me, and I get you.”
“Tis true. Ye are a funny wife, full of spirit — did ye ken when I was growing up the elders told me ‘Daena marry a woman with a wise mouth, she will make yer life miserable,’ and yet they were mistaken. Ye are a fine wife, with all yer opinions, even when ye are complaining about my fishing.”
I grinned and then lay down so my head was on his lap, looking up at his unruly beard. “You know I’m not really complaining about your fishing. I just like to spar. The fun of teasing you sometimes means I’m saying something I don’t one hundred percent mean. And though I do want to go play around in the tent with you, I am also very much enjoying this — the banter, and sitting by the fire as the sun has gone down. I like the quiet and the dark and the scratchy wool of your kilt under my head.”
He joked, “Dost ye want me tae take it off for ye? For yer comfort?” He shook his hips so my head jiggled.
I giggled. “You’ve been riding a horse all day, and those splashes in the water earlier weren’t enough. I probably don’t want to have my head that close to your arse, not that you’re not handsome, and hot, but we are very horsey-smelling, both of us.”
“Och, but I put the water upon m’whirlies, and twas verra cold. I might need some appreciation for the effort.”
I laughed. “Appreciation for a dip-in-the-stream ballbath — the very lowest form of bath for your balls? Have you met me sir?”
“Ah yes, m’bhean ghlan, I hae met ye. I hae fallen in love with ye, and though ye think me a foul beast, I ken ye love me as well.”
“God I love you so much.” I rose up and kissed him and then enjoyed it so much, deep kissing and making out near the fire that before I knew it I was climbing on him and then astride his lap, kissing more.
The fire crackled beside us. The stream glistened as it flowed in the moonlight. His lips pressed to mine, his beard against my face, he was soft and warm like a bear. My arms around the girth of him. His big man-hands on me — I felt small compared to his bigness, my mountain man.
I mounted him.
And then I laughed because that was funny.
“What is amusin’?”
“You got me on you without going into the tent. We’re outside by the fire and the stream.”
His hands rose up under my skirts and I pulled his kilt up his front.
He said, “Aye, ye wanted the tent, I wanted ye by the fire. We hae had too much of it indoors...”
— his breaths so close to my ear, my skin. I said, “Shhhh, forget I said anything, this is good,” as he pulled me closer.
* * *
The next morning we were up very early. I groaned. “I can’t understand why we’re up so early. What’s the point of it? This is like Katie: she gets up so early and wants everyone up.”
Fraoch rolled to his front and did a push up to all fours, growled, and shook his head like a wet dog. I laughed.
“I am wakin’ up, do it, ye hae tae give it a try.”
I groaned and slowly pushed myself up to all fours in our bedding and then growled and shook myself. I laughed. “Okay, you’re right. I am much more awake now. But coffee... coffee needs to happen.”
“I will make it before we ride.”
We actually spent some time splashing around in the stream, watching fish swim, jumping from rock to rock, and getting pretty muddy, and then we finally loaded up onto the horses.
We took our time as we rode. Fraoch described the view, named the mountains, explained the route, and talked endlessly of the flora and fauna. I loved listening to him. He was excited to return to his childhood home. He had come back every now and then, but he wanted to show me...
Then we came over the final rise to Glencoe where a giant thunderhead had climbed to the highest point of the sky, settled on the gorgeous green valley, and was pelting the landscape with rain, as lightning arced to the sky.
“I’ve never seen one of the storms from a distance before.”
“Aye, tis terrifying, but at least we can see where we hae tae go.”
I gulped. “Yes, and maybe no.” Lightning sparked up and down from the ground to the billowing storm clouds. “I mean, we could just turn around and go home.”
“And what would be the fun in that?” He urged his horse down the trail in the direction of the storm.