Chains by Kristine Allen

“To  Be  Alone”—Five  Finger  Death  Punch

When we walked through the door of the clubhouse, we were fucking tired and sore. Everyone welcomed us home, but again they seemed off. Fuck, I really hoped shit wasn’t gonna stay like that. If so, I might as well have stayed in Flagstaff.

“Way to do an Iron Butt. I’ll leave that shit to you youngsters,” Kicker said with a chuckle.

“Not like we wanted to, but if we wanted to outrun the weather, there was no choice,” grumbled Raptor. The prospect behind the bar handed him a cold beer as he dropped to a barstool.

“Goddamn, how can you do that?” Phoenix grumbled. “My ass hurts watching you do that!”

“Your ass hurts? What the fuck did you guys do on the way home?” Squirrel teased.

Raptor shot him a glare, I rolled my eyes, and Phoenix flipped him off. Sabre snorted as he sat next to me.

“Prospect, can I get a whiskey, neat?” I called across the bar, and he nodded as he pulled down the bottle of Crown and a glass.

“Where is everyone?” Raptor asked as he glanced around. It was a Friday night, and there would usually be more people around than there were.

“Few are out on a job, Blade is off doing God knows what, and Angel is at home with Jasmine since she wasn’t feeling good,” Squirrel said, and Ghost immediately pushed him in the arm and frowned. Squirrel held his arm.

“Damn, what did you do that for?” he asked Ghost with a pout.

“What’s wrong with Jasmine?” I asked, and I swear to Christ you could’ve heard a pin drop.

“She caught a bug, and with the baby, it’s done a number on her,” Squirrel said and Ghost damn near kicked him off his stool.

My heart stuttered to a stop, and I couldn’t breathe. Finally, I sucked in deep breath and looked at Ghost. “Baby?” I asked in a deceptively calm tone.

“Chains! A word,” Venom called. My glass hit the bar with a loud clunk, and I followed my president to his office.

The world seemed to be spinning too fast. To the point where I had to reach a hand out to the wall to balance myself. My mind was reeling. I wasn’t sure which way to take what I’d heard.

“Sit,” Venom said as he motioned to the chair. He sat behind the desk, opened the drawer, and pulled out his bottle of Crown Royal XR. When he pulled out two shot glasses, one of my brows cocked up.

When both glasses were full of the golden alcohol the color of Jasmine’s eyes, he slid one to me. For a second, I stared at it. Then my gaze lifted to his. Expression locked down, he raised the glass and motioned to mine.

Cautiously, I raised the shot glass. He held his out and we clinked glasses, tapped the desktop with the glass, then downed the rich liquid. The perfect burn chased down my throat and warmed my stomach. Between that and what I’d drunk at the bar, my muscles loosened up, and I waited.

No way had he called me in his office just to do a shot.

“I have a job for you,” he said as he poured a second glass for each of us and placed the bottle back in the drawer.

“Okay,” I said. Not that a job would be unusual, but fuck, I had been back all of thirty minutes. It also didn’t warrant sharing his good whiskey with me.

“Drink up,” he said as he held his glass up again. Once we both finished, he stacked the glasses and leaned back in his chair. He stared at me over steepled fingers.

“Facet found the last of the Bloody Scorpions involved in the abduction.”

I sat up straighter. Honestly, it had been months since I left, and before then, we hadn’t had any luck.

“We need them alive.”

“What?”

“We need to get all of the information we can out of them about the operation. Once we have what we need, Angel said he’ll gladly help you with them, and so will Voodoo.”

My brows rose, and I gave him a disbelieving stare. Angel was willing to work with me. Not willing to kick my ass? What the fuck had happened while I’d been gone?

“Uh yeah, okay. That’s what you called me in here for?”

“Would it have been something else?”

“Well, you pulled out the good shit, and that’s not your MO.”

He raised his brows like he didn’t know what I meant. Finally, I decided to just ask about Jasmine, because I was pretty sure this had something to do with that.

“Squirrel said something about Jasmine and a baby. What did he mean?” I studied the wood grain of his desk and held my breath for his reply.

“It would seem she’s knocked up.” At the tone of his voice, I looked up at him. “Won’t say who the father is, either. Some of the brothers think it was some random dude and that’s why she won’t say.”

My teeth ground together, and my blood began to boil at the visual of a “random dude” touching her.

“Know what I think?” he asked in a bored tone. At that moment, I really didn’t. All I cared about was getting to Jasmine. I wanted answers.

I shrugged, and he leaned toward me with his forearms crossed and his intent gaze holding mine.

“I think it’s yours,” he dramatically whispered. My heart lodged in my chest, and so many emotions flooded me that I didn’t know which end was up.

“What? But I didn’t, I mean, I’ve been gone, I… uh.” Unable to form coherent thought, I snapped my mouth shut.

“You trying to say it’s impossible?” A sarcastic brow lifted as he studied me because he knew damn well it could possibly be mine. He was daring me to deny it, but I couldn’t. Then I had to wonder why none of my fucking brothers thought to say anything to me. Especially Ghost, who I talked to most often.

Both hands covered my mouth before I dragged them down. “What if it is mine?”

“You’re asking me that?” He pointed at his chest and gave me a look of mock surprise. Fuck.

“I mean what does that do to my standing in the club? How is Angel with this? Does he think it’s mine?”

“You mean does he want to kick your ass? Probably. Is he handling all of this okay? That’s debatable. He only found out a couple of weeks ago. But I can tell you that he and Ghost are the reason you’re back so unexpectedly.”

“How?”

“Because they both came to me separately and wanted to know when you were going to be home. Ghost went so far as to say he felt it was time you came back. Then Angel told me his sister was pregnant. I’m not an idiot, Chains. You think I never noticed the way you are with her? You think no one else did? Then she ends up in your room and Angel wants to string you up? When I took her to her room that day, I pretty much told her she needed to shit or get off the pot.”

Disbelief screwed up my face.

“Don’t look at me like that. I don’t need high school drama in my fucking club. So either she was in the right headspace to be with you or you two needed to stay the fuck away from each other. I knew damn well there was no fucking way that was going to happen, regardless of what I had to say. That’s why when the opportunity came up to send you to Flagstaff for a while to help with their tattoo shop, I jumped on it. I think you both needed time to figure out what you wanted without Angel going after you for your inability to keep it in your goddamn pants.” And there was the Venom we all knew and loved. Stern, no bullshit, I-will-rip-off-your-head-and-shit-down-your-neck Venom.

I stood. No way was I going to question my president, but maybe he should’ve sent Angel’s hot-headed self to Flagstaff instead of me.

“I’m going to see her.”

He raised his chin. “She hasn’t been staying here at the clubhouse for the last few days. She’s been sick, so she’s been at Angel’s,” he finally admitted in a gravelly voice.

Fuck.

Well, might as well get it over with.

“How are you going to handle this?” he asked me without so much as a flicker of emotion. His eyes seemed to ripple.

“What do you mean, how am I gonna handle this? I’m gonna find out if it’s my kid, then go from there.” After that, I honestly had no fucking clue.

“Better brace yourself.”

“Yeah, I know.” If it was mine, Angel was going to kick my ass.

And I was going to let him.

My gloved knuckles rapped on the glass of Angel’s door. It wasn’t long before I could see someone approaching through the rippled glass.

They already knew it was me. Angel had the highest tech security system known to man. The only question was who was going to answer.

The door swung wide, and I breathed a sigh of relief when it was Korrie. How I was lucky enough to get a brief reprieve, I didn’t know.

For a beat she stared at me with pursed lips. Then she shook her head with a look that screamed she didn’t wish she was me for a second.

“Come on in,” she said as she stepped back for me to pass. I entered their house and swallowed hard. I’d been there before, but my gaze traveled around, seeing it with new eyes. It was more than a house; it was a home. Something I hadn’t had most of my life.

“Is Jasmine awake?” It was only nine o’clock, but according to Squirrel, she’d been sick.

That was when Angel approached. His jaw clenched, but other than that he remained impassive. His hand landed protectively on his wife’s shoulder. Not that he thought I’d hurt her, but because she was his. That had my brain spinning too. It had me wondering if there was any hope of that with Jasmine.

And that thought nearly knocked me on my ass.

That thought spoke of a future.

“I’m here,” she said from the stairs, and I looked up. My memories hadn’t done her justice. It was possibly that mythical “glow” that I’d heard people talk about when Kira and Korrie had been pregnant, but whatever it was, she was stunning.

Her golden skin was radiant, and her whiskey eyes were smoky. I never would have guessed she’d been ill if it hadn’t been for the slightly bruised look under her beautiful eyes that spoke of troubled or lack of sleep.

Taking her in, I noticed the small curve of her stomach, and my chest constricted. Not one time in my life had I thought I’d have a child. What kind of father would I be? Also, it wasn’t often I could have sex that I could handle, let alone try to be in a relationship. Yet looking at her on the stairs as she nervously chewed on her lip, I wanted things I’d never hoped to have.

“Jasmine,” I breathed.

As if suddenly realizing we had an audience, her cheeks flushed pink.

“We’ll be in the den if you need us,” Korrie said as she dragged a mumbling Angel behind her. He paused to shoot me a glare. I really wanted to flip him off, but I was too caught up in the woman on the stairs.

“Do you wanna go outside?” she nervously asked as she came down to the last step, putting us eye to eye. It killed me that I didn’t know if her nervousness was because it was someone else’s or mine.

“Sure.” I followed her through the house and out back. She took a seat at the patio table and crossed her arms in a defensive posture.

Catching a movement from the window, I glanced over to see Angel with his face damn near pressed to the glass, glaring at me. Korrie tugged him away, and I sighed.

Unable to sit, I stood with my fingers linked behind my neck. Though I wanted to wrap her in my arms and bury my face in her neck, I needed to know.

“Is it mine?” I asked, unable to wait another second.

The guilt on her face didn’t answer my question.

The she nodded. Disbelief mixed with rage blasted through my veins. Though I might not have given the thought of having children much consideration, the mere thought that she might’ve considered keeping my child from me sent fury burning within my soul.

Not wanting to lash out but completely at a loss, I stood there panting, unable to draw a deep breath. It was as if I was suffocating. My mind was a jumble of disconnected thoughts.

“Did you even plan on telling me?” It came out as a pained whisper as I prayed she said yes. If not, my heart might shatter.

“Yes. Don’t be an idiot,” she snapped.

“When? Because I’ve been gone for four fucking months, Jazz. How long have you known? I’m sure it’s been longer than the last few days.” I was angry, but more than that, I was hurt and irrationally lashing out.

“Umm, hello? You. Weren’t. Here, Nico!” She said as she gripped her hair in frustration.

“You couldn’t call?” I asked, hating the way my voice broke at the end.

“Nico, please understand. I know you. If I had told you, there wouldn’t have been anything that would have kept you away. I never wanted to be the reason you got in trouble with the club, or worse, got kicked out.”

“Yet you refused to tell your brother about us when I begged you to!” I roared. Her logic infuriated me, but I took a deep breath before I continued. “How do you know they wouldn’t have been supportive? Look at Loralei, Kira, Korrie—they were all welcomed in as family. And you’re already family because of Angel.”

Tears rolled down her cheeks, and I fought for composure, because I’d been a piece of shit. Too late, I remembered how she responded to anger and yelling. It gutted me to see her cry, no matter how pissed off I was. Gritting my teeth, I closed my eyes and tried to chill the fuck out.

“I’m sorry, Nico. I’m so, so sorry.” She was all-out crying, and I hated it.

“Stop,” I said as I dropped to my knees next to her. “I’m being an asshole and you don’t deserve that.” Her head swiveled slowly my direction, and I cradled her face in my hands. With gloved fingers, I wiped her tears and kissed over the wet trails.

“I wanted to be a better person by the time you got back. I didn’t want to be the broken shell I was before. I hated that woman. I wanted you to know that when I was with you, it was because we needed to be connected, not because I needed control. I wanted you to be happy you were having a baby with me. I wanted to be normal,” she cried, and my heart ached. This beautiful woman should never have to cry unless it was from happiness. She deserved everything good in the world—the best of everything. Though I knew that wasn’t me, I remained there and selfishly kissed away her tears.

The sounds of the night wrapped us in their folds as I kneeled on the hard concrete and rested my forehead to hers. My gloved hands gripped her hair.

“You aren’t broken, baby. You might be bent, but you’re far from broken. You are the strongest woman I know. And you’re right—if I’d known about the baby, come hell or high water, I’d have been home. But know this—I’m here now, and we’re going to figure this shit out, because I’m not keeping my mouth shut anymore. You’re mine, Jazzy. You hear me? Mine.”

She brushed the side of her nose against mine, and I nuzzled hers before brushing a kiss softly against her lips.

One way or another, I had to find a way to make this shit work, because I was never letting her go again.