Puzzle by Nora Phoenix

44

Four weeks later, in the middle of the night, Branson’s phone rang, and they were both awake instantly. Ryder looked at his watch. Three a.m. Nothing good would ever come from phone calls at this time.

“Mom?” Branson said as he picked up the phone, sitting on the edge of the bed. Ryder rolled out of bed so he could stand right next to him. He grabbed the hand Branson offered him, threading their fingers together.

“Oh, god… Will he be okay?” Branson’s voice broke at the end, and Ryder squeezed his hand as Branson’s mom answered him, too soft for Ryder to hear.

“Does Brenda know?”

All Ryder could pick up was the word mission.

“We’re on our way.”

Branson ended the call, and his eyes were tearing up as he looked up at Ryder. “My dad was rushed to the hospital with sky-high fever and abdominal pain. They suspect the tumor has broken through the walls of his remaining bit of colon, and they’re doing emergency surgery.”

That didn’t sound good. “Let’s head over.”

“I…I’m scared,” Branson whispered, not moving.

Ryder pulled his head against his stomach and held him tight. “I know.”

He didn’t know what else to say. Platitudes were useless and could even be a lie. He wasn’t going to tell him everything would be fine or some shit. If it turned out he was wrong, he’d never forgive himself, and worse, Branson might not either.

“Thank you for being there,” Branson said, his eyes closed as he leaned into Ryder, hugging him with all his might. “I don’t know how I’d do this without you.”

“I love you. That means I’m here for all of it, the good and the bad stuff, including moments like this. Don’t thank me for that. It’s what you do when you love someone.”

“Oh, chéri…” Branson inhaled deeply. “I love you too. You’re the best thing that ever happened to me.”

Ryder kissed the top of his head. “We need to go, babe.”

“Yeah.”

Branson let go, then rose, stumbling as if he’d snapped out of a haze. Good. He could take this time to process his emotions later, but right now, they needed to get their asses to the hospital. If things went wrong, he’d need to be there for his mom.

They got dressed quickly, and Ryder grabbed some meal bars, which would come in handy if they had to spend the day there. They rushed out the door, and Branson slid into the passenger seat without asking. Ryder was happy he didn’t have to convince him that driving himself wasn’t a good idea. At least it should be a quick trip in the dead of night.

“I heard you ask about your sister,” he said a few minutes later. “What did your mom say?”

“She’s on a mission, so she can’t be reached right now.”

“When will she be able to communicate again?”

“In twenty-four hours, Mom said.”

That could be too late. Ryder didn’t say it. Why would he? Branson knew that as well as he did, and voicing it out loud wouldn’t change anything.

“We knew when she was commissioned there would be moments like this when her job takes priority over everything else. Dad wouldn’t want her to abort a mission for him. In fact, he’d kick her ass if she did.” Branson smiled softly. “He’s always been incredibly proud of her, and he’d understand if she can’t come right now.”

“I think he’s very proud of both of you.”

“He is…and so is my mom.”

They were silent after that, but Branson had put his hand on Ryder’s thigh, and that small gesture of intimacy made him feel connected to him, even when Ryder couldn’t touch him back.

When they arrived at the hospital, they found Branson’s mom in a waiting room, slouching in a seat and looking pale and stressed. No wonder.

“Mom,” Branson said. She jumped up and stepped into his embrace. Ryder’s heart clenched as he watched them, their pain and worry so palpable.

When they let go, tears were dripping down her cheeks. “Thanks for coming, honey.”

Branson looked at Ryder. “Don’t thank me, Mom. That’s what you do when you love someone.”

She smiled through her tears as she held out her arms to Ryder. “Thanks for coming with him, sweetie.”

Ryder had met Branson’s parents the day after they’d gotten together, and he’d loved them instantly. That feeling appeared to be mutual, just like Ryder’s parents had welcomed Branson enthusiastically.

“My pleasure, Mrs. Grove.”

She released Ryder, then cupped his cheek. “Please, call me Lisa. You’re family now.”

And just like that, he belonged. Warmth filled Ryder’s heart. “Thank you…Lisa.”

“Have you heard any updates yet?” Branson asked.

“No, but they warned it could be a while. They weren’t sure what they’d find during surgery. But even then, the high fever is worrisome. It could indicate sepsis.”

Sepsis. Ryder didn’t have any medical training, but he’d lived with a doctor long enough to know that one. It meant the infection had spread to the blood and could now travel throughout the entire body, possibly resulting in multi-organ failure. Paul had lost plenty of patients to sepsis over the years, and the ones that survived could have lasting effects, like damaged kidneys. If Branson’s dad contracted sepsis on top of everything else, his already weakened immune system might not be able to fight it off.

Judging by the shock on Branson’s face, he knew that too. Words were useless here. Nothing he said would make Branson feel better, so he’d better try to do something practical for him. “Why don’t I get us some coffee?” he said. “Would you like coffee too, Lisa?”

She nodded with a grateful smile. “Thank you, sweetie. Milk and sugar, please.”

“Sure thing.”

He left them by themselves as he set course for a coffee machine. Good thing he knew his way around a bit, having spent plenty of time waiting here for Paul to be done with work. The coffee was horrible, but it was warm and had caffeine, and right now, that trumped everything else. He’d just gotten the second cup and was placing a third when someone gasped behind him.

“Ryder?”

Shit. Paul. He recognized his voice without even turning around. He should’ve known he’d run into him here at some point.

“What’s up, Paul?” he said, pushing the buttons for coffee with milk and sugar. He already had two black coffees for him and Branson, and he grabbed lids and put them on.

“What are you doing here?” Paul walked up to him and stopped so close to his right he couldn’t ignore him anymore. With a mental sigh, Ryder faced him.

“My boyfriend’s father is in surgery, so I’m here to support him.”

Paul appeared stunned for a moment, but then he scoffed. “Boyfriend? That’s a bit of a sad lie, don’t you think?”

A lie? Paul thought he was making it up? Ryder looked at him, the man he’d once loved. He’d thought him so hot, especially in the scrubs he was wearing now as well. That whole arrogant I’m-a-hotshot-doctor vibe had done it for him, though now he wondered why.

Yes, objectively speaking, Paul was good looking—six foot two, with a pair of startling blue eyes, and in great shape—but his beauty was only on the surface. His eyes didn’t have the warmth and the joy that Branson’s had. His smile was calculating, never spontaneous and sweet. If he even smiled at all. He was perfect on the outside but so cold and shallow inside. Everything he did was to make him look good, never for someone else. The man didn’t have a selfless cell in his body, and if he did, he’d shoved it deep down where no one would ever see it.

“Why the hell would I feel the need to lie to you about having a boyfriend?” he asked.

“‘Cause you don’t want to look like a loser in front of me?”

Seriously, he thought that? It only showed Paul didn’t know him at all. “I’d think that after having been together for five years, you’d know I’ve never given two fucks about what anyone else thinks. That was always you, Paul, not me.”

Paul’s eyes narrowed. “We broke up five months ago. Are you really trying to convince me you found someone else in such a short time?”

How had he always ignored how mean Paul could be with these thinly veiled barbs and insults? He’d been so fucking blind. Dorian had always seen it. Maybe that was why Paul had never liked him. Before, he would’ve ignored it or tried to apologize or do something else to fix it, but he was so done with that. “First of all, I’m not trying to convince you of anything. You asked why I was here, and I answered your question. Second, at the risk of repeating myself, I’m not bothered even in the least by what you think or don’t think of me. And third, the implied insult that I would never be able to find another boyfriend is, quite frankly, low and mean, even for you.”

Paul looked stunned for a moment. “What else am I supposed to think when you lied to me before?”

“Lied to you? About what?”

“Look, I know you must’ve felt…inferior, considering I’m a doctor and you’re an accountant, but I didn’t understand why you had to make up some job working for the CIA.”

What the actual fuck? Paul thought he’d been lying about that? He’d been in the application process when they’d still been together, but he hadn’t started working there until after they’d broken up. And Paul thought he’d made that up? “Not that I need to defend or explain myself to you, but I do work for the CIA as a forensic accountant. And for your information, I’ve never felt inferior because of your job. I felt small because you made me feel that way, because you constantly criticized and belittled me, making me think everything was my fault…while all that time, you were screwing around behind my back, violating the promise of monogamy we had made to each other.”

Paul stood frozen to the spot, his eyes wide. “You work for the CIA?”

“Holy shit, was I speaking a foreign language? Yes, Paul, I do. Why the fuck would you think I’d lie about that? I don’t lie, and I don’t pretend. If nothing else, you should’ve known that about me by now.”

“I thought you were bragging, making things up to look more important, to compete with me.”

Ryder rolled his eyes as he took Lisa’s coffee and put a lid on it. “It’s not a competition. It never was, at least for me. I loved you, and I gave you everything I had…almost literally. We both know you fucking cleaned me out, and I deserved so much better.”

For the first time, Paul looked guilty. “I feel bad about that in hindsight. I should’ve paid you back. I can give you—”

“I don’t want your money. I want nothing from you except to leave me alone. Nothing you can say or do will ever make up for what you did to me, how you betrayed me and my feelings for you. But it’s all in the past now. Believe it or don’t believe it, the choice is yours, but I know the truth. I do have a boyfriend, and he’s amazing. He loves me just the way I am without wanting to change me, and I love him more than I ever thought I was capable of. I’m happy, happier than I’ve ever been…and I don’t give a flying fuck whether you believe it or what your opinions are on that. Have a great life, Paul. Just leave me out of it.”

He stared at the coffees. How would he be able to take all three? Maybe clamp one between his arm and his chest? Branson popped up next to him, and he startled. “I’ll take two, chéri. You just grab that last one.”

“Thanks, babe.”

Ryder smiled at him, relieved that this whole conversation with Paul was over. He was done with him, he had been for a long time, and all he wanted now was to walk away and not look back. “Let’s go back to your mom.”

Paul stepped aside. When they were at the door, Branson turned around. “Ryder forgot to mention that we’re not only perfect together but that the sex is spectacular as well. Best sex either of us has ever had, right, chéri?”

Ryder managed to keep it together long enough to answer. “Damn right.”

As soon as they were in the hallway, Ryder stopped Branson, curled his free hand around the man’s neck, and pulled his head in for a fierce kiss. “Thank you. I love you.”

Branson winked at him. “My pleasure. Though you didn’t need my help. You were doing a pretty good job of demolishing him all on your own.”

“Yeah?”

They set off again, and Branson bumped his shoulder. “It was surprisingly hot to watch.”

Ryder laughed. “Thank you once again. I’ll remember that if I ever want to get you in the mood.”

Branson grinned. “As if you ever have to work hard for that.”

“True.”

Branson lifted their joined hands and pressed a kiss on Ryder’s. “I love you, chéri. You’re my everything.”

They were okay. No matter what the future would bring, they’d be okay…because they’d be together. Forever.

* * *

We haveone more book to go…Del’s story. Coming in October!