Born By Moonlight by Krista Street
Chapter 3
~ WYATT ~
I paced my living room, mentally reviewing the checklist of items I needed to complete before I left for my assignment in the fae lands. A part of me was thankful for the slew of things to do. The thought of leaving my mate was making my wolf and me increasingly agitated.
It didn’t help that I wished I was going to the Bulgarian libraries instead of the fae lands’, but we still didn’t have clearance to the most coveted libraries in the world even though our gargoyle representative, the vampire Nicholas Fitzpatrick, had also sent a petition to the supernatural courts.
But on the upside, I did have two SF gargoyles working in the Supernatural Forces’ private library at this very moment. Masters Mallory and Alarus had been working since sunrise and would report to me any important findings while I was scouring the fae lands’ libraries.
So, for the time being, this current plan would have to do. And if the Gods were with me, the fae lands’ archives or the SF scrolls would have the answers I sought, then I’d have a cure for the mysterious illness that plagued my mate, and I wouldn’t have to venture to Bulgaria.
If they didn’t present a solution, I could only hope that the supernatural courts would give me access to the Bulgarian libraries soon.
My heart thrummed rapidly, as it had ever since last night when my mate fell unconscious. I didn’t want to think about what failing this assignment would mean.
My tablet buzzed. I whipped it out, expecting the message to be from Wes, but when I saw the name at the top of the text, I nearly tripped.
Little Flower.
Of course, Avery had no idea that I used the nickname I’d secretly given her in high school as her contact name in my tablet.
With a shaking finger, I tapped her message.
I was told you were asking how I was doing. I’m fine. Thank you for checking, sir. Avery
My chest heaved. Sir. The formality was like a punch to my gut, even though addressing me that way was required since I was her superior. Still, it felt wrong. She was my mate. My mate was my equal, yet here at the Supernatural Forces, she would never be seen as such given she was a new recruit.
A growl rumbled low in my belly, because my reaction wasn’t even the concerning part. I read her text again, my growl strengthening.
I’m fine.
But she wasn’t fine. How could she believe that? The events last night weren’t inconsequential, but she apparently thought they were.
But why?
And then it hit me.
Shit.
She thought she was okay, because nobody had told her the truth. I slammed a hand through my hair and stormed about my apartment again. She needs to know.
My feet came to a standstill. Avery was awake now. I could see her before I left, and I could tell her the truth about what had happened to her.
I grabbed my keys and headed to the door. I’d already been to her apartment twice today, but she’d been sleeping both times.
I wasn’t surprised by how tired she was. The magic that had permeated her system was slowly destroying her. If I wasn’t able to find answers and was too late . . .
No. I can’t think that way.
I wouldn’t allow her to die.
∞ ∞ ∞
Five minutes later, I was knocking on Avery’s apartment door, my back rigid. The industrial-strength carpet beneath my soles had been recently washed. Hints of cleaning agents buzzed through my senses, but I made myself stand still despite its noxious odor.
I knocked a second time, more urgently.
Charlotte answered, her eyebrows shooting up as her tall form straightened. “Major Jamison. Nice to see you again. Are you here to see Avery, sir?”
I peeked over her shoulder. The living room was empty. “Yes. She texted me, so I’m assuming she’s awake now.”
Charlotte’s head tilted, curiosity strumming across her features. I couldn’t blame her. It was my third visit to their apartment today, which wasn’t exactly normal behavior for a commander. “Of course, sir. I’ll get her.”
She left the door open but since she hadn’t invited me inside, I stayed in the hallway.
A murmur came from the back of their apartment, then the scent of lilacs drifted toward me like a soft breeze.
My Little Flower.
I inhaled, as my wolf perked up inside me, his tail beginning to wag. My stomach clenched, and electricity buzzed through my limbs. Avery’s scent had always gotten a reaction from me.
My mate rounded the corner to the living room, and my breath caught.
Long dark hair tumbled over her shoulders. Full breasts strained against her fluffy sweater, and her shapely legs were accentuated in black leggings. Damn, she was so beautiful.
Her brown-and-gold-colored eyes narrowed when she saw me.
My gut tightened. I would never forgive myself for ruining her trust in me, but perhaps, with baby steps, I could remedy it.
“Private Meyers, may I speak with you?” I kept my words low and non-authoritative. If she didn’t want to speak with me, I wouldn’t make her, but I also knew that since I was her commander, she probably wouldn’t refuse.
Those power issues were one of the reasons I’d pulled back from a relationship with her. Dating a subordinate was forbidden in the SF. The only way we could have dated was if we waited until her training finished, she quit her new recruit program, or I left the SF.
If we waited for her to finish, she would have been forced into a two-year long distance relationship from the get go. Not exactly a good start to a happy relationship.
And Avery quitting wasn’t an option. She’d worked too hard for her degree and wanted to be an ambassador too desperately to give it all up, and if I quit that meant breaking a promise to my fallen squad member, someone I’d considered a brother, who’d died in battle protecting me.
I owed him my life—literally. I couldn’t break my promise to him, not when it was the last thing he’d asked of me just before he died.
For that reason, I had to stay employed at the SF for at least two more years. Marcus had asked me to look out for his son, Elijah, and personally train him when he joined the Supernatural Forces. But Elijah was only seventeen. He couldn’t join the SF for another year, and I promised I would be his commander when he arrived. I had to honor that commitment, which meant I had to stay in the SF for the time being.
So I’d sacrificed what I wanted most in the world—my mate. I’d made myself halt any progression of my feelings for her, and I’d put distance between us despite my wolf’s obsession with her, even though I had fully intended to pursue her no matter where she was in two years’ time.
But that plan had ended disastrously.
The hurt and pain that had shadowed Avery’s eyes—after I’d rejected her following that night under the stars—would haunt me forever.
“Private Meyers?” I said again when she just stood there.
She jolted, as if coming out of a trance before stumbling through the living room into the hallway. She clutched the door’s handle and closed it, probably so her roommates wouldn’t overhear us.
When it was just the two of us in the hall, she faced me and wrapped her arms protectively around herself. Distrust oozed from her, and she arched an eyebrow in question, that delicate winged feature as beautiful as the rest of her. But it wasn’t just her beauty that had always captivated me. It was also her heart and her fire.
Already, I scented the anger stirring inside her at my intrusion even though she was trying to hide it. I had a feeling that if I wasn’t her superior she would have told me to fuck off.
Damn. I loved her grit. Even though her magic was weak, her soul was strong.
But then reality set in. She was also only here, standing with me in her hallway, willing to talk to me because she felt she had to. She clearly didn’t want to.
“Sir? Charlotte said you wanted to see me?” Her face remained blank.
I jerked my spine into a rigid line. How long had I been gazing at her in silence? I forced a tight smile. “Sorry to barge in on you, but I had to—” Shit. Where did I begin? How did I tell her that the Safrinite comet had done something sinister to her? That within hours, days, weeks, months, who knew . . . she could be dead?
Both of her eyebrows rose when my silence continued. “Had to . . . what, sir?”
I took a deep breath. “Did Farrah or Douglas tell you anything about your condition?”
“You mean what happened last night in the fae lands?” She shook her head. “Not really. They just told me to come back every morning so they could check on me. Why?”
“They didn’t say anything about the comet’s lingering effects?”
“No.” Her brow furrowed, and irritation rose from her like steam. “What is it you’re trying to say, sir?”
I opened my mouth to tell her. To confess what I’d been privy to last night—that the scans had shown her life force and magic were dwindling, that slowly but surely whatever power the Safrinite comet had planted inside her would inevitably kill her.
But nothing came out.
I plowed a hand through my hair in disbelief at how unsure I was acting. Incompetence was not something I was used to feeling.
Dropping a bomb like that would inevitably lead to questions. Questions she deserved answers to. But I wasn’t a diagnostic sorcerer or a healing witch. I wouldn’t know how to address her concerns.
My voice grew rough when I replied, “You deserve to be told everything. Tomorrow, when you check in at the healing center, demand that they tell you.”
“Is that an order, sir?”
Shit. I hated this. Because she was right. That had definitely sounded like an order issued from a superior to a subordinate. Fucking SF rules.
I softened my tone. “It’s not an order, Avery. It’s a request.”
She went utterly still.
I inched closer to her. “And I’m not here on official SF business. I’m here as your—” Mate. I swallowed that word down. “As your friend who cares about you.”
Her head whipped back. “A friend who cares about me? Is that really where this conversation is going, sir?”
I groaned, then bit back an admiring smile. She was all fire, but I also knew she wouldn’t find my esteem for her spirit amusing.
I kept my expression contrite. “No, my intention wasn’t to rehash past events or discuss how you may think I feel about you.” My breath stopped. It was the closest we’d come to discussing that night under the stars since she’d brought me cookies, which I hadn’t accepted. I inhaled deeply as shock lit her eyes. “I simply wanted you aware that last night information was revealed to me that I don’t think was shared with you.”
For a moment, she just stood there, then she shook her head and her expression cleared. “Information about the comet?”
“Not about the comet. About you.”
Her lips parted. “Is it bad?”
“Yeah, it’s bad. Demand that they tell you about everything the Safrinite comet did to you.”
“So that’s why you’re here? Because you’re concerned about my . . . well-being?” She sounded so skeptical.
Fuck, she distrusted me that much.
I nearly took a step forward. I so desperately wanted to touch her, reassure her, convince her that I cared so fucking much about her and that had never stopped.
But I could tell that she wasn’t open to that. She still didn’t trust that I simply cared about her well-being, even though the truth was that I savagely loved her to the depths of my soul.
But she wouldn’t believe that because of how I’d treated her. I’d made a huge fucking mess of things between us.
Somehow, I managed to lock my frame into a rigid line and swallow my self-directed disgust. “I care more about your well-being than you probably realize.”
Her gaze only narrowed further, her expression turning wary.
I sighed. “Please, Avery. I’m not trying to trick you, and I’m not lying to you. Please just ask them tomorrow about what the comet did to you.”
A slightly fearful tint crept into her scent. “Should I be worried?”
A growl erupted from me before I could stop it. “Dammit. I’m sorry. Worrying you was not my intention. I just wanted to ensure that you were entirely aware of what’s going on.”
I cursed myself for not being better prepared. But I hadn’t had time. I could be leaving within minutes if Wes’s text came through, and I had no idea when I would be returning or when I would see her again. I’d just known that I couldn’t leave knowing she’d never been told the truth.
“And you won’t just tell me now?” Irritation washed through her words.
“It’s not that simple. If I understood it, I would.”
She huffed, but some of the anger left her scent.
An amused smile again tugged at my lips, but I schooled my features even though my fingers itched to touch her, to feel her fire and passion.
It didn’t help that her fluffy aqua sweater highlighted her full breasts or that her leggings amplified her shapely legs. And her damned intoxicating lilac scent was doing a number on my arousal. How long had it been since I’d touched her?
My wolf whined inside me. He missed her, too, and he wanted to shift and lick her cheeks, nuzzle her hand, and romp in the fields with her. When she was around, he turned into a huge puppy who wanted to play. Only a mate could bring that side out of a full-grown alpha wolf.
I’m sorry, I said internally to him. The past three months hadn’t just been hard on me. They’d been hard on him too.
Avery shifted, her arms folding tighter over her chest. She still watched me warily, but given how she chewed her lip, I couldn’t help but think she was remembering things about us too. Or maybe that was just wishful thinking.
I watched her teeth nip at her lip, and a memory surfaced. My blood heated. It was of her naked and writhing in my arms as my fingers plunged deep inside her slick, hot folds. She’d cried out when I’d made her climax, and she’d come right on my face.
My breath hitched as a rush of blood went straight to my cock. I jerked upright.
Fucking hell. I’d be tenting in seconds if I didn’t control myself, and she didn’t need anything like that from me right now.
Maybe I could talk to her now. Explain to her how I really felt and why I’d rejected her.
But then I shook my head. No, I couldn’t even do that. Even though I wanted to come clean and explain everything about Marcus, about why I’d pushed her away, and the truth about how I honestly felt for her, I couldn’t.
It wasn’t fair to offload all of that on her when she already had bad news coming from the healing center, and I could literally be leaving within minutes and wouldn’t have time to properly explain how I felt.
So I settled with, “Just promise me, Avery, that you’ll make them tell you. And promise me that you’ll hold on to life. Whatever you do, keep fighting and hold on.”
The anger and mistrust in her eyes abruptly vanished, shock taking its place. “Hold on to life?” Then she shook herself. “So, this is actually serious. That’s actually why you’re here.”
My insides withered. It was as though she finally believed that I was here with pure intentions and not just to torment her. That was how little she thought of me. “It is. I swear that I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t.”
A wary yet resolved expression washed over her features. “Okay. I’ll ask tomorrow morning when I stop in.” She walked to her door, and was about to open it, but then paused and turned back to me.
Her gaze met mine. Some of the distrust and agitation that had oozed from her the second she’d spotted me standing in her hallway had dispersed. Confusion still filled her scent but something else did too. Something I couldn’t quite identify.
“Thank you,” she said hesitantly. “For telling me.”
I managed a curt nod as my heart ached. I balled my hands into fists, my arms rigid at my sides. I longed to crush her to me, to hold on to her and never let go, but she didn’t want that from me. Right now, that was the last thing she wanted.
I gritted my teeth, hoping she wouldn’t see the tornado of emotions ripping through me.
She gave me a curious look, then opened her door and stepped inside.
“Avery?” I called to her before she could close the door. “There’s one other thing. I’m leaving today for a new assignment.”
“You are? Where are you going?”
“The fae lands. Major Fieldstone will be in charge of your squad until I return. I just wanted you to know.”
“Okay, will you . . . uh . . . be in danger?”
“No, not on this assignment.” Which was the truth. Whatever had happened to Avery seemed to be a lone, rare celestial event.
Her expression smoothed, and I wished more than anything I knew what she was thinking. I cleared my throat. “Take care of yourself, okay?”
Her heartbeat picked up, the sound soft and fluttering in my ears. “I will. You too.”
She closed the door, disappearing inside her apartment, and I let out the breath I’d been holding.
For a moment, I just stood there, clouded in her scent. Memories of that night under the stars, so many weeks ago, now felt like a distant dream that I’d been too stupid to hold on to.
How I wished I could have wrapped her in my arms, nuzzled into her neck, and simply felt her before leaving.
But she didn’t want that. Not anymore. Maybe not ever.
I inhaled deeply, her fragrance imprinting on my memory and searing into my soul. With a regretful sigh, I knew that was the last time I’d see her for who knew how long.
Turning, I strode down her hallway just as my tablet buzzed. Pulling it out, the text I’d been waiting for from Wes appeared.
The meeting is set in thirty minutes earth time. They’re waiting for you in the fae lands.
My jaw locked. The time had come. After I retrieved my bags, I would venture to the fae realm, and my assignment would begin.
I flew down the stairs and out the door. My heart pounded. This wasn’t like other assignments the SF had given me.
No, this one was personal, and I couldn’t fail at it.
If I did, I would lose my mate forever.