Tarnished Love by Bianca Borell
CHLOE
I smack my palm against my forehead. I slept with him. What in the name of all that is holy, and I am not the religious type, is wrong with me? The traitorous, satisfied, lower half of me tingles in response. I won’t panic, we’re both grown-ups. He’s two years younger. Okay, now I am being hypocritical. So, I’ll just resume my life pre fucking Filip, but that grin as I exited his room told me he won’t let me forget it. I shouldn’t have drunk that much, but if I had to see Damien and Bria eyeing each other one more time, I would have thrown myself in the lake. They should bloody talk already and put their past behind them.
When I reach the spiral stairway, I tiptoe down but no one stares at the freshly fucked intruder. I reach the bottom, and I halfway exhale when Sophia’s eyes widen, and she stops short in front of me. Heat blasts through me, setting my cheeks on fire.
“No way,” she says, amusement lacing her words. She’s an evil little thing. Should I expect anything different from a du Sky? No.
“Sophia, please, let’s pretend this never happened.”
“That’s so not going to happen,” she says, adding to my mortification as her electric eyes scan me from head to toe. No one has ever intimidated me, no woman anyway, but right here and now, she is the sole witness of my greatest mistake.
“Come on.” I have no chance to ask where we are going, when she grabs my hand and off we fly through the doors and jog toward the du Sky’s mansion.
“No one is here. I need the quietness.”
“Didn’t you want to go to Filip?”
“Not anymore, he’s insufferable after he’s had sex.” She scrunches her face, and another round of embarrassment courses through me. He’s a manwhore. You slept with him and liked it too, I tell myself. I groan, and she suppresses a smile.
When we enter, my eyes take everything in. I’ve never been upstairs.
“We’re going to my room.”
I pause and look at the second floor and say, “That’s Damien’s space, right?”
“He allows no one up there.”
“Why?” She leans on the wall, her eyes up.
“Whatever he hides in there is to both conceal his weakness and keep it intact.”
“Bria.”
“Of course it has something to do with Bria.”
She sighs, and we amble toward her room, or better said, wing. My mouth drops when I step inside a large, spotless, white room.
She drops on the rose Chesterfield couch.
“Why am I here?”
Her eyes pierce me with seriousness.
“Chloe, I don’t want any more surprises in my life.”
I’ve been nicknamed Casualty, now labeled a surprise. They are all entitled pricks.
I walk toward the window, men and women dressed in catering uniforms clean the place, with Sarah, the owner of the catering firm they always use, gesturing around. They have gatherings as a sport.
“I am here for Damien.”
“No, you used to be here for him before you slept with Filip. I love my brother, but if I were to pick between him and Filip, I would pick Filip.” I twist my head to her. I never expected this.
“Surprised? Don’t be. Damien’s heart is untouchable, and if you’re still around, it means he hasn’t slept with you.”
“Listen—” I turn and face her, but she shoots up and interrupts me.
“No, you listen to me. I can be your friend, or merely someone you greet whenever you show up with Damien. It’s your choice, but if you hurt Filip, I will destroy you.”
“We just slept together once. There is no reason for this.”
I raise my hands in surrender, then dart to leave but she grabs my elbow and something softens her expression.
“Stay away.”
“I intend to.”
“Good, but if you don’t, let me warn you even though warnings help no one. If you stay, and decide to try this out, be gentle.”
“Sophia, you’re giving me whiplash.”
“I am on the edge.”
This family is drama incarnate. It borders on ridiculous, but something about her—her fierceness combined with her soft side—has me staying and dropping on the edge of the bed.
“Brave.”
“Or stupid.”
We smile, and she ducks under the counter and grabs two sparkling waters.
“This should hydrate you after both the drinking and the fucking.” My eyes bulge, and she bursts into laughter.
“I’ll never live this down.”
“But even though we know it’s a mistake, we go for it.”
“I wonder why?” It wasn’t supposed to leave my mouth, but she lifts her knees to her chin, shrugging.
“Because we can’t help ourselves,” she offers, a sad smile tugging at her full lips, and I nod. Bloody hormones.
“Between those two, you will be the one who’ll hurt the most.”
“I’ll stay away from Filip.”
“You love Damien.”
“I love Damien, I might even get mixed-up feelings from time to time, but I am not in love with him. It would be suicide.”
“Yes, it would. He has always only had eyes for her, Chloe, even now when he hates her, but he hates himself more for not getting over her. What she did to him, only to come back with Alexander? Bria altered us all.”
“You let her.”
“No, that’s where you’re wrong. Bria and Damien’s downfall caused a domino effect of pain.”
“They never talk.”
“And as long as they don’t, we’re trapped in limbo.”
“Why won’t they?”
“My guess is they are afraid . . . who knows but them. They’re not the same people anymore.”
“What about you, Sophia?” She places the bottle down and leans on her hands.
“I am the du Sky princess.”
No, you’re so much more, Sophia. I get the feeling you have more secrets than any of them.
***
I leave her and wait for Damien by his car.
He doesn’t say he’s sorry, just opens the door of his car. Kind of used to it by now. I ball my hands into fists and glare at him.
“Look, Damien, it’s getting bloody old, you leaving me with your family.”
“Chloe, I . . .”
“Confront her or move on.”
“Shut up.”
“I am your best friend.”
His eyes soften as if he remembers my place in his life, and I hate her all the more.
“It won’t happen again.”
I hope it’s true, but whenever she’s around, it is as if his brain shuts off.
“I am not mad at you, more at me.”
“Chloe, we are both fucked up, this is why we stay together.”
I smile because he’s right.
“Let me make up for fucking it up with you for a second time.”
“How?”
“A weekend in the mountains. Just us and some relaxing.”
A weekend alone with him. Why does my heart flip-flop like this?
“I can’t afford the places you can.” I huff and cross my hands over my chest.
“I am not like your father.”
I wince, he’s merciless.
“Don’t be a prick.”
“We have known each other for years. I have money, more money than I could ever spend, get over it.”
“You don’t understand.”
“Explain, and let’s get over this.” He rests his hands on the roof of his car, his eyes fixed on mine, and I sigh.
“I will be in your debt, owing you something . . .”
“I am inviting you, so of course I’m paying for everything.”
“Did I tell you that on my eighteenth birthday, he gave me a bill for everything he ever spent on me?” My entire posture turns rigid as I wrap my arms around myself.
“He is scum. You deserve someone to always be there for you. Let me be that person,” he says as he drops into the driver’s seat and adds, “I care for you.”
I put the seatbelt on, and he takes my hand in his.
“You are a part of my life, but you always have one foot outside. Stop overthinking.”
“I earn my own money.”
“And do something good with it, like invest in your future.”
I lean my face in my palm against the window, thoughts swimming in my head, drowning me.
“Morals are a compass; they will still point in the right direction. And I owe you, Chloe, not the other way around. If it weren’t for you, I wouldn’t be here.”
***
In any other moment I would have refused his offer, but after the weekend, after Filip and Sophia, he is the only constant in my life. His life is full of privilege and money, mine is full of photoshoots and glitter. I am sure there are worse matches.
Here in the ski resort of the rich and famous everyone greets him. While I may be considered a top model, he’s in the public eye more than I am.
We check in to the hotel, and at the opulence, my mouth hangs open while he doesn’t even spare a second glance. I remember he’s used to this.
“Damien.”
“Hmm?”
“I am so out of my element.”
“Make it your element.”
Just like that. When the concierge asks if there is anything we would like, Damien says, “Ensure she gets a dress for tonight.”
“Of course, Mr. du Sky.”
A short while later, I slip into the hotel’s car, and it stops in front of a shop filled with couture gowns. When I enter, a woman welcomes me with a smile. I think she’s smiling, it’s hard to tell from all the Botox, and her fake tan clashes with the high-end clothing she wears. After the concierge exchanges some words with her in German, she rushes to me with a champagne flute. The price tags dizzy me, but I decide on three dresses: a rose halter neck with an embellished ruffled skirt, a black bodycon dress with a deep V neckline, and a pale blue strapless wrap gown. She beams after I give her his black card. When I arrive back at the hotel, Damien peels his eyes from his laptop and smiles at me.
“Have you any idea how much these cost you?”
“Don’t care.”
After shopping, I indulge in a spa day, and after facials and a massage, my skin glows. The concierge lets me know Damien is in the pool, so I change and go find him. His body splits the water, and I halt. He emerges, water dripping down his sculpted face, and I shed my bathrobe and stand in front of him as his eyes travel up my one-piece black swimsuit. I squat and slip my feet into the water as he props on his elbows, eyeing me. That’s when I notice his tattoo, a black masterpiece.
“I didn’t know you had one,” I say and point at his chest.
He grins and adds, “You haven’t seen me naked.”
“Does it mean something?”
“Why? Think I am the shallow type?”
“Come on, you know what I mean.”
“I don’t want to talk about it.”
“So, Bria.” His eyes shut, and a low growl escapes his lips.
“Just because you don’t talk about it, it doesn’t mean you’re fine.”
“What do you want to hear?” I smile, happy with this small victory, and put my cheek in my hand.
“Since we’re bonding, tell me something about her, something beautiful.”
“She was fierce, a beautiful tomboy. The moment she had a say, she traded dresses for pants, smiles for grins. I always chased after her, she always wanted to discover everything. She never backed off a challenge. Before I had time to stop her, she was already climbing to the top of the tree,” he sighs and cocks his head to the side, water dripping down his face. “And now, she’s the epitome of a refined, put together, cold shell of a person.”
“You miss her.”
“I miss my life.”
My heart cracks at Bria being a synonym to his life.
***
“I will be the envy of everyone tonight,” he smiles and says the moment I step outside my room, wearing the black dress I bought earlier in the day.
“There will be paparazzi.”
“I am just an heir, Chloe, but with you on my arm, we might make the tabloids.”
“You value your privacy.”
“I value you.”
I should know better than being sucked into the vortex of his life, and still, I don’t stop him.
