Unexpected Lovers Box Set by J.B. Heller

After I droppedthe L-bomb on Archer, and we told Bates about us, the apartment became a danger zone—for Bates, at least. He can’t walk in the room without his hands over his eyes just in case me and Arch are making out.

I haven’t kissed this much since I was in high school.

“Is it normal?” I ask the girls as we lounge around on the sofa at Kins and Atticus’s place. Hannah, her friend, Amy, and I are the only ones drinking real wine, while Emory, Kins, and Storm sip on mocktails.

Kins nibbles on a cracker and nods. “I think so. That’s how it is with me and Atticus.”

“Us too,” Em throws in.

“Jake and I still make out like horny teenagers,” Storm adds. “I love kissing my man. His lips are just . . . ugh, they’re perfect.”

We all laugh at the dreamy expression on Storm’s face.

Hannah chimes in with, “Oh yeah, kissing is the shit. Although, I’m rather partial to kissing more than just Sam’s lips—if you know what I’m saying?” She waggles her brows.

A choking sound has us all spinning around, finding Kins’ seventeen-year-old stepson, Arlo, standing in the kitchen, slamming his fist against his chest as he coughs and sputters.

“Arlo!” Kins squeaks. “I didn’t know you were home,” she says, rushing to the kitchen and pouring him a glass of water. “Are you okay?”

The poor guy takes the water and sips it gingerly. “Thanks. I’m fine, Kins,” he says. “Chelse wasn’t feeling well, so I dropped her home early. I didn’t realize I’d be interrupting a Hornbags Anonymous meeting.”

Kins’ cheeks blaze, and her pleading gaze darts to us.

“Sam’s a lucky man,” Arlo says, winking at Hannah.

Hannah grins wickedly. “And I remind him of that regularly.”

“You joining us or what?” I ask Arlo as he grabs a can of Coke from the fridge.

“Why not? It’s not like I’ve got anything better to do,” he says, coming to sit on the floor against the wall, facing us. “So, what were you guys talking about before I got here—other than Hannah’s love of blowjobs, that is.”

Mocktail sprays from Kinsley’s nose, and I burst out laughing. I love this kid.

“That basically sums up the tone of the conversation,” Amy says, taking a dainty sip of her wine.

“Oh, and Lennon has a boyfriend!” Em adds excitedly.

Arlo quirks a brow at me. “I thought you were waiting for me?” he says, dramatically clutching at his heart. “I don’t know how I’ll ever recover.”

“I’m sure you’ll manage,” I say. “Just call one of the many girls you have on speed dial. I’m sure one of them will be more than willing to ease your pain.”

He smirks. “I don’t need to call—texting is sufficient.”

Hannah scoffs. “And he accuses us of being hornbags.”

“Don’t hate. I know what you were like before you and Sam hooked up. He told me and Dad all about your patented Starfish Method,” Arlo says, waggling his brows.

This piques my interest. “Starfish Method?” I ask. “Pray tell.”

There is no shame in Hannah’s game. She shrugs, takes a long sip of her wine, and says, “Whenever a relationship was nearing its end date, I’d implement the Starfish Method. It completely circumvented any confrontations. It’s genius, really.” She has another drink then clears her throat and straightens. “Generally speaking, I’m an active participant in the sex department. So, when the time came to break things off, I’d just starfish it.”

I glance at the other girls. Surely I’m not the only one who has no idea what she’s talking about. Kins and Amy seem to be the only ones in on it, though, if their knowing smirks are anything to go by.

“I’m not following,” Storm says, frowning.

Hannah gets up, places her wine on the coffee table, then lies in the middle of the floor where she proceeds to spread her arms and legs out and says, “Ta-dah!”

“So, you still had sex, but you just lay there like a dead fish the whole time?” I ask, confused.

She nods, grinning. “Yeah, but a starfish—not a dead fish. That sounds gross.”

Okay, I’ll give her that, but I still don’t get it. “Why didn’t you just dump their asses?”

“Ugh, no thanks. I hate confrontation. I’m a lover not a fighter. This way, they broke up with me, and technically, I didn’t even have to do anything.”

Huh, well, I guess that makes sense then. It wouldn’t work for me, but I see its merits.

Baby Seb lets out a loud wail, and Storm stands to retrieve him from his porta-cot in Kins’ spare room. Arlo jumps to his feet. “I got him,” he tells her. “Chill, mama.” He disappears down the hall and returns a minute later with Seb, who is staring up at Arlo like he hung the stars.

Arlo returns to his place on the floor, cradling the baby close to his chest, talking to him quietly.

A collective round of aww sounds off around the room, and Arlo pops his head up, smirking. “Chicks dig guys that are good with babies,” he says.

Ugh. There are too many hormones up in here. They’re rubbing off on me and giving me mushy feelings. No, thank you. I get up, heading for the fridge. “Who needs a refill?”

Amy and Hannah hold out their empty glasses, so I bring the bottle back with me. I top us all off then drop onto the couch. “So, when’s the last fitting?” I ask Kins, referring to our dresses for the wedding in two weeks.

“For you girls, it’ll be next Friday. But mine is two days before the wedding,” she says, patting her little belly. “This one’s growing so fast. I’ve put on, like, three pounds just this week.”

“Your boobs are looking bigger, too,” Em says, popping a chip in her mouth.

Kins nods. “They are!”

“And that’s my cue to leave,” Arlo announces. He hands baby Seb off to Storm, then he waves to the room. “Later, ladies.”

“Later, kiddo,” I call to his retreating back as I turn back to Kins. “Hey, would you mind if the wedding is Archer’s and my official first outing as a couple?”

“Of course not,” she says, smiling wide. “It was my idea that you bring him.”

“Yeah, I know. I just . . . I guess I’m nervous about actually touching him in public,” I admit. “It’s going to be weird.”

“You’re overthinking it again,” Storm says, patting Seb’s back as he fusses.

“I can’t help it,” I whine. “This is all new, and I don’t know what to do with it. The wedding will be fine—I know that. It’s afterwards that I’m worried about. He said he’ll give me as much time as I need before we take it public.”

“So, what’s the problem?” Hannah asks.

I tell them about the other day on the sidewalk before I met up with them at Fiora. How I wanted to touch him, but couldn’t. “It sucked, and the look in his eyes when he nearly kissed me but had to pull back . . . it gutted me.”

“So just freaking kiss him,” Storm says. “Whether you do it tomorrow or after the wedding, it’s not going to matter. He is who he is, and it’s going to get attention. Now that you’ve told your brother, does anyone else’s opinion really matter?”

“What she said,” Hannah agrees as she sweeps her pink hair into a high ponytail.

I sigh. “I’m going to have to have a press release ready to go out when photos of us together start surfacing. I’m his agent. People are going to have something to say about that.”

“Meh, screw them,” Emory says. “I say wait and see if anyone says anything. Yeah, you’re his agent, but you’ve also been friends for the last twenty years. You’ve been photographed together before.”

That’s true enough. Maybe I am making a big deal out of nothing, and nobody will care. Maybe it’s all in my head.

“I think you’re trying to protect yourself by making up reasons you shouldn’t go public,” Kinsley says. “If you don’t go public, then it’s not really real.”

I swallow, staring at my friend. She smiles softly, placing her hand atop mine. “It’s okay to be afraid, Lenny,” she says. “Love is scary.”

“Ain’t that the truth,” I mutter. “I’ve never been so terrified in all my life.”

“Girl, you’re preaching to the choir,” Em chuckles. “Now throw a surprise pregnancy on top of that, then we can talk.”

I flip her off. “Don’t say that shit to me; you’ll jinx me. I’ll leave the baby-making to you guys. This factory is closed for business, indefinitely.”

“That’s what you say now.” Em smirks.

I glare at her. And she throws her head back, cackling.

I shake my head, grinning. God, I love my girls.

When I get home, I know what I need to do.

Archer is kicked back on the couch, watching an episode of The Boys with a beer in his hand.

“Hey, you,” I say, collapsing half on top of him.

He throws his arm around my shoulders, tugging me closer, and presses a kiss to my temple. “Hey, baby, you have a good girls’ night?”

“Yeah, I did,” I tell him. “Arlo even joined us for a while. What about you?”

“Can’t complain. Just been chillin’ out, waiting for you to get home. Bates is off with some chick he met hangin’ out outside the stadium after practice today.”

“I really need to talk to him about cutting down on the random hookups, or at least spacing them out a bit more. That’s, what, the third girl this week, right?” I ask.

Archer nods. “Something like that.”

I shake my head and sigh. Bates and his conquests are an issue for another day. “So, I was thinking we could maybe go out for dinner tomorrow night . . .”

“Seriously?” Arch says, shifting so he can look at me.

“Yeah,” I mumble. “What do you think?”

His smile takes over his entire face. “Shit yeah. Let’s do it. Have you got somewhere in mind, or can I plan it?”

I laugh nervously. “Uh, asking you was as far as I’d gotten in the planning stage.”

“Great, leave it with me, and I’ll sort it,” he says, kissing my temple then settling further into the cushions and tugging me back to his side.

We watch two more episodes before I fall asleep, and Arch carries me to bed then climbs in behind me.

I could get used to this.