The Beast and the Enchantress by Camille Peters
Chapter 10
In the following days, I desperately tried to keep my distance from the prince. At first it was easy to avoid him, for after the awkward way our interaction in the library had ended when I’d rejected his reaching for my hand, he seemed to be avoiding me as well, as if my denial had made him nervous.
But it was as if some unseen power was drawing us together, for despite both of our intentions, we only managed to go a few days before encountering one another in the woods.
Gladen startled when he saw me, nearly dropping the small stack of books he carried. “Dahlia!”
Despite knowing I shouldn’t be pleased to see him, my treacherous heart lifted all the same, and I couldn’t quite hold back my smile. “Hello, Gladen.”
He didn’t respond, only stared at me before realizing what he was doing and lowering his gaze with a blush. “It’s good to see you. It’s been a while. When you didn’t seek me out, I feared…” He shifted nervously and didn’t answer.
Oh, so perhaps he hadn’t been avoiding me after all. “I’ve been busy. I’d assumed…you were busy as well.”
“Never too busy for you.” His eyes widened at his words, as if only just realizing how they came across. “I mean…I always enjoy our time together. We’ve become good…friends.” He cleared his throat and hastily looked away.
Awkwardness hung between us, an emotion I ached to dispel. I nodded towards his books. “What are you currently reading?”
It was the correct choice of topic. Gladen’s uneasiness vanished, replaced by his usual boyish eagerness as he showed me each book in his teetering stack and recounted the ones he’d read since our last meeting.
Soon the lingering tension dispelled completely and his manner shifted to the usual friendliness I’d come to expect from him. His expression and actions were so open and sincere it made me wonder whether I’d misread our parting interaction in the library…and if I was misreading the tender looks, soft smiles, and almost flirtatious comments he made now.
I was imagining things. If I but convinced myself of that, then there’d be no harm in continuing to meet with him. I’d missed these conversations, the warm joy he made me feel, and especially him—his company, the way his eyes lit up as he smiled, everything. As wrong as I feared this was, I didn’t want to lose him.
Following our chance encounter in the forest, the feat of attempting to stay away from Gladen became impossible; not only did Gladen repeatedly find any excuse for my company in the usual areas we spent time together, but my heart urged me to seek him out in return, desperate to fill the void he left whenever we weren’t together. To make matters worse, I found myself unconsciously flirting with him as I tentatively explored the feelings within my heart I knew I shouldn’t be experiencing, but which I felt anyway.
Time soon lost all meaning, as if a spell had been cast over us. I never would have imagined that moments themselves could be magical—a part of the most beautiful and rare of enchantments, filled with joy and beauty. If only there were a spell to bottle these precious moments up in order to keep them forever. How could I possibly stay away from this new and beautiful type of magic?
I was a terrible sister.
No, you’re not, I tried to reassure myself. For this will go nowhere. You can’t let it.
There likely was nothing to even be concerned over, I rationalized. My sister had gotten over Gladen’s rejection easily enough, so perhaps what she’d felt towards him hadn’t been love, but merely fond memories of their childhood friendship, one my own friendship with the prince did nothing to jeopardize. Even if her feelings had been something more, in truth they weren’t even suited for one another, not like we were.
Besides, Rosemarie was a sweet, understanding soul. Surely she’d be happy this…friendship brought me such joy…wouldn’t she? I took a steadying breath to quench the guilt once more prickling my heart. Of course she would.
I clung to this belief as I found myself once more on the way to the gardens to meet with Gladen, swinging a basket of pastries Rosemarie and I had baked this morning while I carried the book Gladen and I had been reading together tucked beneath my arm, one I hoped to continue should we accidentally meet up again today.
The early summer day was bright with promise. I hummed cheerfully as I walked through the royal grounds to the rose garden, which had become one of many special places I shared with Gladen, tucked away between the palace and the enchantress cottage, a place between both of our worlds that was just ours. The beauty of the garden only added to my joy as roses of all colors and varieties bloomed around me, their own type of magic.
I slowed when my gaze settled on a bed of mayflowers growing in a clump alongside the path, similar to the ones I’d attempted to practice my transformation spell on in the woods a month before. My fingers tingled at the memory, as if my powers were stirring to life once more and aching to be unleashed. Perhaps it was time to try and rekindle its flame.
I reached inside myself, searching, and though the route to my powers was overgrown from disuse, I accessed my magic almost effortlessly, just as I’d done before the curse had weakened it. I whispered the familiar spell, waved my hand, and watched as my powers floated towards the flower, enfolding it in soft, shimmery light. The flower immediately transformed into a white butterfly. Regaining my magic was like reuniting with an old friend. Warmth expanded in my chest as I watched the butterfly flutter away.
The joy brought by my magic’s return and the anticipation of a morning with Gladen occupied my thoughts so thoroughly that it took me a moment to notice he wasn’t alone when I came upon him in the rose garden—a noblewoman whose name I didn’t know sat close beside him where he was attempting to read on our usual bench.
I immediately stilled, watching in horror at the noblewoman’s coy smiles and the flirtatious way she batted her eyes. A hot feeling seared through me, sharp as poison, especially when I witnessed the way she leaned closer, practically touching him. Whatever her interest, it certainly had nothing to do with the dear man himself, just his position as the prince. While I too appreciated his looks, the more our relationship had deepened, the easier it’d become to see past his outward appearance—whether cursed or not—to the man inside.
“What are you reading, Your Highness?” Her tone was sickeningly sweet, as was the disgusting way she scooted herself closer to him.
He stiffened and leaned away but otherwise gave no reaction. She gave an exaggerated pout.
“Your book must be thoroughly engrossing, but as interesting as I’m sure it is, certainly there are more interesting things to occupy your attention.” She ran a finger down his arm.
He flinched and snapped to his feet, his glare sharp. “The fact that I find my book far more engrossing than you is an invitation for you to depart, not to continue to bother me with your unwanted attention.” He made an attempt to keep his voice even, but frustration seeped through. “Now be so kind as to leave me in peace.”
She gaped at him before lifting her nose in the air, her expression sour. “As you wish, Your Highness.” Her departing curtsy was rigid, but he didn’t seem to notice or care; he’d already sat back down and resumed reading, paying her no mind as she stomped from the garden.
I watched her leave, the scene so familiar, much like when Gladen had rejected my sister. And though I recognized his behavior for what it truly was—not the cruelty of a conceited prince, but a man with no patience for shallow relationships that could never be genuine—it still saddened me to see it. Prince Gladen was a better man than his impatience often caused him to be.
Gladen heard my footsteps as I slowly ventured towards our bench and he looked up with a wide grin. “There you are. I’ve been hoping to see you.” He beckoned me closer, but I didn’t move, the interaction I’d just witnessed making me hesitant.
“If now is a bad time…I see you’re occupied. I can come back later…”
“Don’t be ridiculous. The book was just a futile attempt to distract myself while waiting for you. Not even the most engrossing story holds a candle to your company, Dahlia.” He set his book down and patted the spot beside him again, his expression imploring and completely irresistible.
Appeased, I grinned girlishly as I joined him, relishing the warmth of our close proximity. But my smile quickly faded as I glanced towards the garden exit where the noblewoman had left in a huff. “I see I’m not the only woman you’ve had the pleasure of interacting with this morning.”
He groaned. “You saw that? Then I’m afraid you also saw me at my worst.”
I gave him a look that I hoped was both understanding and disapproving. “I know their attention is hard for you, but perhaps you can let them down in a way that’s more true to yourself.”
He pondered my words for a moment before he sighed. “You’re right, I behaved badly. I find myself patient in most areas except for fawning ladies. I miss the reprieve the curse granted me from their annoying attention, and now that I must endure it once more, I find my patience wearing quite thin. But that’s no excuse; I must work on being better in the future.”
I smiled at his willingness before my expression became teasing, a way to soften the scolding I’d just given. “Do all fawning ladies bother you?” I raised my eyebrows in mock offense.
He chuckled. “Indeed, all of them…with one exception.”
While his innocent flirting was familiar, something deeper lit his eyes as he looked at me now. It only intensified as he reached out and curled a loose strand of my golden hair around his finger, his movements almost hypnotic. My breath caught at the feelings the gesture ignited inside me. As close as we’d become, save for occasional brief accidental brushes against my hand he hadn’t attempted to touch me again since that day in the library, and I found I enjoyed it far more than I ought.
Gladen shifted on the bench, angling his body more towards mine, his expression almost shy. “Dahlia? There’s something I want to discuss with you.”
Hope lifted my heart, even as fear tried to pull it back down. “What is it?” I shakily managed.
He took a wavering breath. “I—” His words ended abruptly.
I grazed his arm. “You can always confide in me, Gladen.” We’d already shared several secrets in our many conversations together, so many that the only one that remained unspoken concerned my powers and my true identity, the very one he could never find out, for it would cause him to push me away forever.
He didn’t answer immediately, his gaze fixated on my fingers, which I now realized were stroking his arm. I’d spent so much time wanting to touch him, and even though his sleeve was a barrier between my fingers and his skin, I could feel his taut muscles beneath the fabric, ones I ached to further explore.
“You’re touching me,” he stated.
I immediately froze. What was I doing? Hadn’t I just witnessed that sniveling noblewoman try to touch him in such an intimate way moments before and him being thoroughly disgusted by her flirting?
“I’m sorry.” I silently ordered myself to pull away, but I found I couldn’t move. Nor did he. Instead he rested his hand over mine, keeping my fingers securely in place, his permission.
He slowly lifted his gaze to meet my own. “It’s alright, Dahlia. I—can’t tell you how long I’ve wanted to feel your touch.”
As he spoke, his own fingers stroked the back of my hand, his touch far more pleasant than anything I’d experienced before, even more than the feeling of magic beneath my skin. My powers tingled with each caress, and I was certain that with his single touch I could perform even the most complicated of spells.
He slowed and bit his lip. “Part of me can’t believe this is real. You never touched me…before.”
I understood his unspoken implication, recognized the insecurity and fear tainting his voice, the part of him that still doubted anyone could value him for who he truly was.
“Just because I resisted doesn’t mean I didn’t want to,” I said. “Even with as close as we’ve become, you’re still the crown prince.”
“Not with you,” he said. “Never with you. I’m sorry for being afraid. I’ve spent my entire life wanting to be seen, but never as much as I’ve wanted to be seen by you.”
“You are,” I said. “Please don’t doubt.”
He gave a shaky laugh. “Fear can be rather powerful, even for a prince who’s supposed to be brave. It’s why I’ve held myself back for so long, something that’s becoming increasingly impossible the longer I’m around you.”
How could he not see that he was already brave? Before the curse had started to fade, he’d bravely walked the corridors of his palace despite the whispers and disgusted looks from the court. He’d learned to speak up to the overbearing king, and remained true to himself even after he’d regained the attention of the court.
Yet fear filled him now. “There’s nothing to be afraid of,” I assured him. “I know you, Gladen. You’re brave enough to take a leap of faith.”
He swallowed and nodded, and with a steadying breath he returned his touch to my hand, grazing my skin with his fingers, but before I could fully enjoy the sensations such an innocent gesture created, he hastily withdrew. “Was that alright?”
I scooted my hand closer, an invitation for him to touch me again. His smile was a bit shy as his fingertips returned to their former position, his thumb rubbing circles along my hand, his look concentrated, as if he was trying to read the secrets hidden beneath my skin.
I’d imagined this moment dozens of times, and now that I was experiencing it…it was far more magical than I could have ever dreamed. And it only grew more so. My own hand dropped from his arm as he reached out to cradle my cheek, his thumb moving to caress my jawline in a thoroughly distracting way. His gaze seeped into mine, filled with so much emotion and many secrets, ones I longed to spend the rest of my life discovering.
“Dahlia,” he breathed as his touch moved to weave through my hair. “Whenever I’m around you…I’ve never felt this way before. My feelings came so quickly that at first I feared they were simply because you’re the first woman I’ve ever come to truly know and who, in return, has come to truly know me. But I’ve been surrounded by the court long enough to quickly learn how special you are. It didn’t take me long to realize that what I truly feel about you is genuine.”
What he truly feels…? As much as I welcomed his words, they caused my panic to rise, a reminder I didn’t deserve for him to feel such sweet sentiments towards me. Yet I wanted them all the same.
“What you feel?” I managed breathlessly.
He trailed his hand down my arm to lace our fingers together. My hand instinctively tightened around his, which earned me a smile.
“Political obligations have been a part of my life for so long that I never imagined I could find true happiness…until I met you. And now that I’ve found you…I never want to let you go.”
His free hand curled around my cheek and he leaned closer, causing my already frantically pounding heart to nearly burst from my chest. Was he going to…kiss me?
I leaned closer, desperate to bridge the distance between us. Imagining what it’d be like to touch him had been nothing to my precious daydreams about what it’d be like to kiss him. Despite how close we’d become I wanted to be closer still, to feel his lips on mine and to be enfolded in his arms, my own personal castle.
We were inches away, close enough I could feel his warm breath caress my lips. Gladen’s fingers grazed my wrist, brushing over a wart that had suddenly appeared, whether as a lingering sign of the guilt that hadn’t fully faded from my heart or as a manifestation of the fear crowding out the beauty of this moment, I wasn’t sure.
With my magic strong once again, I didn’t fear he could feel through my concealment spell. But his touch brought to the forefront of my mind all the things I’d tried hardest to forget: the curse I’d cast, one that would forever keep us apart should he ever find out; the disguise I hid behind now, concealing the true me from him; as well as all that had brought me to this point, for it’d all started because my sister was in love with the prince, a man I now knew I would never deserve. If I allowed myself to continue down this path, I’d not only betray my sister, but trick the prince into caring for a woman who didn’t truly exist.
I yanked away with a gasp, severing our touch. “Please, don’t.”
He blinked at me, looking both embarrassed and…rather hurt. It took him a moment to find his voice. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have—it was inappropriate for me to try to—I simply got caught up in the moment, and assumed that you…shared my feelings.”
His words breathed life into the emotions that had been blooming in my heart with each passing day: love. My heart was no longer in my possession and hadn’t been for quite some time. The realization left me breathless.
I’d felt the process occurring, yet I hadn’t allowed myself to admit my feelings, too afraid of what it’d mean that I’d fallen in love with the prince. For deep down I’d always known that I couldn’t have him after what I’d done, which meant realizing how deeply I’d grown to care for him would only make it far more impossible to let him go.
But let him go I must. Yet with the way his expression crumpled at my rejection, I wasn’t sure I was strong enough.
“That’s not why—” I began, but he spoke over me, his voice cracking with emotion.
“Of course you should pull away.” The pain in his eyes deepened and he seemed to struggle to speak. “I—no one could ever—I was a fool to even think it was possible.”
Several warts appeared along his jawline, a sign of the curse’s return, as if it’d simply been waiting patiently for Gladen’s previous fear, bitterness, and insecurity to return and grant it power, emotions my callousness had caused.
“Of course they can,” I said. “I do. It’s just—” But I didn’t know how to explain without telling him everything.
But he seemed not to hear me. “My worth seems to only come from my title, my appearance…yet even they’re not enough, not even for someone as special as you.”
“That’s not why I pulled away,” I said desperately. “We can’t do this, Gladen, but it has nothing to do with you. I can’t…you have no idea what I’ve done, why I could never have you.” I struggled to find a way to explain, yet even if I could have somehow found the words, he seemed too distraught to hear them.
“I spent so much time searching for someone like you,” he continued. “I’d hoped that you were different.”
“I am. Please, you must believe me.”
But he clearly didn’t. Instead, my words only seemed to deepen his despair, agony which broke my heart. As I’d feared, my mistakes were only continuing to hurt him. I reached for him, desperate to make amends, but before I could touch him he hastily stood.
“When I was first cursed I was afraid it’d keep me from ever finding love, but even with it getting better I can’t have you. At first I hoped I could, especially when you seemed to encourage my affections…but I was clearly mistaken. I seem doomed to forever long for something I cannot have.” And without another word he stood and left.
I stared after him long after he’d departed, the garden’s roses blurring with my tears. I hadn’t realized how strongly he’d react to my rejection, which meant that despite the passage of time, his heart hadn’t healed as much as I’d thought. Even if I couldn’t have him myself, I’d never meant for him to doubt his worth.
It was yet another stain on my conscience, and with it I feared I’d forever shattered all we’d built between us. I felt as if something infinitely precious had been stolen from me. For what he didn’t understand was that of the two of us, it was I who didn’t deserve him, as much as I now realized how desperately I wanted him.