Beauty and the Brit by Poppy St. James

STERLING

Camryn is fast asleep in my arms, and even though I have to piss like a racehorse, there’s no way in hell I’m moving from this spot.

Tonight was perfection. And I’m not just talking about what took place between the sheets, though it was hands down the best of my life. It was all amazing. From the dinner we shared, where she made me feel so at ease, to her teasing me tonight once we were alone in the hotel room. I love that she’s a playful lover. In fact, there are so many things I love about her, as nervous as that big L-word makes me.

Being with her this way tonight? That was it for me. She’s mine, even if she doesn’t know it yet.

I was so caught up in the moment, I didn’t stop to question it. I know I should talk with her, make sure she’s okay, but I don’t want to wake her just yet. Needing to hold her a little longer, I tighten my arms around her.

Camryn’s head is resting on my chest, and she lets out a sleepy sigh. I hold my breath, unsure if I’ve somehow woken her, but she merely shifts, nestling in closer.

We crawled under the sheets together, and I look around the room and see that our clothes are still scattered on the floor, evidence of our hurried lovemaking, and two empty glasses still rest on the dresser. Part of me still can’t believe she agreed to come up here with me tonight. I figured my idea of reserving a room would be a waste of three hundred dollars, but I was dead wrong.

But what happens next?

The doubt begins to creep in, as do thoughts of my mum. All the plans I made will evaporate into thin air if I can’t get that inheritance.

I’ve never known a love so pure, so real, and so right. And that’s what I can have with Camryn. I feel it. Deep inside me. When we’re together, we’re magic. Our personalities, our goals, everything matches. And tonight? That sealed the deal.

But at the same time, what we share scares me. I spend my days watching couples end their vows. I hear all the stories of infidelity, and even worse are the stories of those who just grew apart. There are no guarantees when it comes to love. Sure, we all try our best, but it’s far from a guarantee.

Just when I thought I had clarity, things feel more confusing than ever.

I tighten my arms around Camryn, wanting to punch the voice inside me in the face that whispers this could just be for tonight.

I may not be sure of my future, but I know if I do marry, I want it to be for love and not just for money.

There’s no road map for where things are headed between us, but when I think about what Camryn brings to my lonesome days—her sweet smiles, her laughter, the unexpected warmth—I know I’m not letting her go.

While we haven’t discussed everything yet, she has shared some of the things she wants out of life. I know she wants kids, and I can picture it all, a little girl with her wild, thick waves and spark of fire in her eyes. It’s a thought that makes me smile.

I’m terrified I’ll mess it up, but when I think about her smart, level head, her passion for hard work, and her loyalty, anything feels possible. I feel confident that with her by my side, I can have it all. I just have to figure out how.

I run my hand along the bare skin of her back and feel her shift as she wakes up, blinking at me.