Beauty and the Brit by Poppy St. James

STERLING

Iwanted to give Camryn some time, so I’ve kept myself busy with the mountain of work on my desk, but now it’s after five and my heart is in my throat.

I grab my leather carry-all, cell phone, and suit jacket, and head out. The New York City streets are filled with weary commuters and cyclists and cabbies, all jockeying to get through the throngs. They long to be home with loved ones. There are wives to kiss, children who need a bath, crying babies who miss their mothers, and meals to be enjoyed at tables all around the city. It’s something I’ve never taken the time to consider, but on this cool fall evening, I feel more alone than I have in a very long time.

I could call up a mate, go to a pub, enjoy a pint, and maybe even find a pretty girl to flirt with at the bar. But the only girl I want is Camryn. I could go visit my mother. Except what if she’s having one of her off days, and doesn’t recognize me? I don’t think I’m game for any more rejection right now.

I’ve spent years telling myself I don’t want to settle down, that matrimony is for fools. But seeing these people around me, rushing to get home to loved ones while I have nothing, it’s a stark dose of reality. I hop on the train that will carry me to my building and check my cell yet again. Still nothing.

I finally decide to text her.

Can we talk tonight?

I stare at my phone for several seconds, hoping her response is positive and immediate.

But my phone remains sadly silent. Briefly, I consider going to the gym instead of going home. I keep a spare set of clothes in my locker there. Lifting weights and jogging around the track would be better than sitting alone at my apartment, but I decide I don’t have the energy for that.

I’m emotionally exhausted, and I’m beginning to think, maybe this is it. Maybe this really is the end for Camryn and me. A man can only hold out hope for so long before he gives up. But I’ve never been a quitter, and part of me refuses to accept this is the end.

Just then, my phone buzzes in my hand.

I’m on my way home from work. But yes, I think we should talk.

Her message gives nothing away, and of course I’m dying to know how she’s feeling, what she thought when she saw her photo in that folder.

I’ll meet you at home. That okay? I reply.

Her response contains only one word. Sure.

My heart starts pumping in earnest. I could fist-bump the guy sitting next to me, but I refrain. I haven’t been this excited since she agreed to share my hotel room Friday night.

By the time I trek all the way across town toward Camryn’s flat, it’s almost seven. I stop and grab a bottle of white wine and a pint of ice cream. We’ve both probably missed dinner, and in times of stress, there’s no better dinner than sugar and alcohol. At least, that’s my theory.

When I finally make it to her door, Camryn answers, still in her work clothes—a royal-blue silk blouse that reminds me of the color of the British flag, and fitted black pants that hug her curves. She looks beautiful. The only change from when I saw her this morning is that she’s ditched the nude-colored high heels and is barefoot.

Without those killer heels she favors, she looks so small and vulnerable. I hate to think that she was hurting all weekend after thinking I’d hooked up with Rebecca. Quite the opposite—I called security on her, and she left kicking and screaming obscenities at me.

“Can I come in?”

She opens the door wider. “Yes, sorry.”

We’ve both sort of spaced out, our eyes drinking in the other after a long, weary day.

I follow Camryn inside and set the shopping bag on her counter. “Have you eaten dinner?”

She shakes her head, still watching me curiously.

“I brought wine and dessert.”

“For dinner?”

I nod. “It’s not gelato, but it should do the trick.”

“Sounds perfect.” She gathers two wineglasses and two spoons while I use her bottle opener to uncork the wine.

We take everything out to the couch as if by unspoken agreement. Sitting next to her TV is a stack of DVDs of the reality show The Millionaire Matchmaker.

“Really?” I chuckle, motioning toward the DVDs.

She shrugs, digging her spoon into the now softened chocolate ice cream. “It was research.”

There are so many things I want to say to her, but I have no idea how to begin, so for a few minutes we sit in silence, taking turns spooning heaping bites of ice cream directly from the pint.

Setting my spoon aside, I pick up my glass of wine and take a sip. “How was your day?”

She takes one more bite of ice cream, then sets her spoon next to mine on the coffee table. “After letting Anna go, and then trying to pick up where she left off with some of our clients, it was stressful. Thank you for bringing this by.”

“Did you happen to look in the folder?” I ask, growing impatient.

She takes another sip of her wine and then sets it down on the table. “I did.”

Her tone is subdued, and I have no clue what to make of that.

“And?”

She turns to face me on the sofa, her fiery green eyes looking sad. “And I have no idea what it means. And I’m scared, Sterling. You want to marry me? You want to date me?”

I reach over and take her hands, folding them in mine on my lap. “I want a relationship. I want you in my life. After everything—getting to know you, introducing you to my mum, trying to deny my attraction—I’m done. None of those women held a candle to you. You’re the only one I want.”

She pulls her lower lip between her teeth, looking unsure. “What about the inheritance?”

Inhaling sharply, I squeeze her hands. “I don’t know, but I won’t live a lie or deny myself any longer. I want to make you mine.”

Pulling her into my arms, I lean forward and kiss her, softly at first, then deeper as her body molds to mine.

She pulls away suddenly, placing a hand on my cheek. “I have no idea if I’ll be ready to get married five months from now, and in fact, I doubt I will be. And besides that, the idea of marrying someone so quickly is a little insane, no offense.” Her hand falls away, and I miss her sweet touch almost instantly.

“None taken. It’s scary. I get that more than anyone. Marriage is a huge leap of faith, and I never thought it was something I would take on.”

“But now . . . because of the money?” Her tone is uncertain.

“Forget the money. I won’t be controlled by it.”

“But what about your mother?”

My gaze drifts away from hers. “I don’t know.”

She nestles in closer to me, and I know we can both feel it. Love is scary and unpredictable, and neither of us wants to lose what we’ve just started to build. I tighten my arms around her possessively, unsure of what our future holds.

“I need you, Cami. Tell me if you don’t want this, say it. Tell me no.”

She shakes her head. “I’m glad you’re here,” she admits softly.

“I love you.” I groan, kissing her neck.

“I love you too.” She sobs out the words, her lips seeking mine.

She clings to me as emotion crashes through me. Smiling against her lips, I tug Camryn close. I have no idea what’s going to happen next, but I know I need her in my life.