Burning Desire by Marie Harte

Chapter Twenty-Three

Bree glared at Tex, who glared back. He’d been working with another fire station for the past two weeks, and the guilt for his situation and blame sat heavily, weighting her down. They still enjoyed each other, still loved spending their spare time together, but she couldn’t face his friends with what her father had done. So, they’d been apart more often than not on his free days.

Work had resumed, still polishing her project so it would be ready for the city unveiling in two weeks, but at least she had her assistant to help. Her nerves felt stretched thin, on edge because of how important her work was and because her personal relationships seemed to be struggling.

At least she’d mended fences with Carrie. Though they had yet to really sit down and discuss why the hell Carrie had tried to involve herself in Bree’s relationship with Melissa, Carrie hadn’t pushed it again. She had apologized, and that was all Bree had needed to hear.

But some tiny kernel of…something unpleasant remained between them. Unfortunately, Bree didn’t have it in her to dig deep and rip it out. Not yet.

“I’m not talking to your father about this,” Tex said, spacing his words evenly.

“Tex, it’s my fault, I—”

“You can deal with your dad however you like. He’s your dad.” He drew her closer as they sat in her living room, trying to enjoy a movie night at home. “But he’s my boss. I can’t talk to him the way you do. I won’t. He can pull all the crappy things he wants with me, and I’ll take it. I won’t break for that bastard.” He blinked. “I’m sorry. You’re in a bad place with this all around.”

“I know.” She tried not to cry. But her father made no sense! “I’ve talked to him. Charlie’s talked to him. I heard even Ed talked to him.”

“He did?” Tex blinked then smiled. “Good old LT.”

“My dad isn’t reasonable about this. I know it’s affecting you and your friends. I feel like it’s my fault. Maybe if we broke up for a while…”

“But don’t you see? That’s what he wants.”

She frowned at the vehemence in his voice. “Um, you’re not just staying with me to stick it to my old man, are you?”

“What? No. That’s stupid.”

“I’m stupid?”

“Fuck, Bree. You’re not hearing me.”

The argument went downhill from there. Date night turned into time alone for both of them. Tex left. Bree stared at her empty home and burst into tears.

Her father was being such a huge ass. She called him. When he answered, she said again, “Why are you doing this?”

“Why, hello, daughter. How are you this evening?”

“You are ruining my life, Dad. And you’re ruining Tex’s. You have no right to—”

“I have every right,” he interrupted. “I make decisions about my battalion all the time. Your boyfriend is no more special than any of my other people. I won’t make concessions just because he’s dating you.”

She took a deep breath, knowing she was getting nowhere. “Dad, I understand that you’re trying to control my personal life for some reason. I think it’s out of love, but you’re coming across as controlling and frankly, uncaring. I really don’t understand why.”

He sighed. “Honey, when your mother was alive, the man she was in love with broke her heart.”

“Yes, then she met you.”

“No. I broke her heart. First her ex did, then I did. Firefighters live hard lives. It’s not glorious, and it’s not easy. We do it because we want to help people. But helping sometimes leaves scars. The divorce rate is through the roof. The propensity for our people to turn to drink or drugs to deal with this life is high. I’ve lived it. And so did your mother. I don’t want that for you. I promised my Allie I’d take care of you, and I will until the day I die. You might hate me for it, and you might think I’m being a real bastard. Maybe I am.

“But I’m only in charge of a small part of my world. It’s not like I’m telling Tex he can’t date you. If you’re that important to him, why can’t he give up his job and try something else? He’s smart, capable. Why not find a stable occupation and settle down?”

“Dad, are you hearing yourself? You want Tex to marry me? We’ve only been dating a few weeks.”

“I’m not saying marry him now,” he hurried to say. “I just mean that you should always come first, before the job. And if he can’t see that, then who am I really hurting? It’s his choice. I love you, honey. I’ll talk to you when you’re not so upset. Okay?”

He disconnected.

Much of what he’d said made sense…if she and Tex had been dating for four years and planned to settle down. But by her dad’s admission, if Tex couldn’t commit to Bree after being together for—she did the math—one month, then he should be tossed aside?

For that matter, what did that comment mean about hurting Bree’s mom? What had that been about? Charlie, unfortunately, couldn’t explain John’s actions, nor could she get through her husband’s thick head, though she’d been trying.

What the ever-living fuck?

Baffled, annoyed, and heartsick, Bree just sat there, staring at the blank television screen, trying to get up the energy to pour herself a glass of wine she didn’t want.

Someone rang her doorbell.

Just great. She hoped to see Tex but didn’t know if she had the energy to argue with him. She kept trying to help him. He kept telling her he’d handle it. And when she suggested taking a break to help him get back to his friends, he insisted on them not giving in to pressure.

She sighed and made her way to the door, only to stop in shock as she looked through the peephole.

“You know it’s me. Just open up already.”

She opened the door, just to see what would happen. “Melissa?”

Her stepsister walked inside and looked around. “Nice. I like the changes. What’s it been? Four years?”

“About that. Melissa, why are you here? To gloat because Dad is causing me grief?”

Melissa grinned. “There is that. But no. I’m here because of Carrie.”

“Why? Is she okay? What’s wrong?”

Melissa studied her.

“Well?”

“I just… Hell. Do you have anything to drink?”

“Help yourself.” Fed up with not getting answers, Bree went back to the couch to brood. At least Melissa’s unwelcome appearance might give Bree the fight she needed.

Because anger and hurt and confusion kept swimming inside her, threatening to drown her under the weight of so much chaos. Bree liked her life scripted. A life she controlled. Yet lately, nothing seemed to make much sense.

Melissa sat down with a glass of wine. She pushed another at Bree. “It’s a nice Merlot. You have good taste.”

“Why are you here?” Bree stared at the wine. Then thought, what the hell, and drank some.

“Carrie is busy at work lately. Too busy to talk to me or you, really.”

“Your new best friend is ignoring you?”

“Oh, bitchy. I like this new you.”

Bree flushed. “Melissa, I would be happy to yell and scream at you. But I don’t need that, and I know you don’t. So, please, just say what you came to say and leave.”

Melissa sighed. “Fine. I’m sorry John is being such a dickhead about Tex. I like him. And I know you do. And I don’t think he deserves this bullshit, whatever it is.”

“Thank you.” The first nice words Melissa had said to Bree in a long time.

“I also think you owe Carrie an apology.”

“I what?”

“I know you guys made up. And she’s happy about that, because she loves the hell out of you. You’re like sisters.”

“There’s no like. We are sisters.”

Melissa nodded, her eyes thoughtful. “Then why would you ask her to choose between you and me? Hell, between you and anybody? Why should Carrie have to give up something to love you?”

“What are you talking about?”

“When you made such a big deal at her place, about her taking my side. You acted like it was either me or her, and when she didn’t shove me out the door, you stormed out.”

“That’s not what happened.” Bree glared at her then blurted, “And she should have booted you out the door. She’s my friend.”

Melissa gave a harsh laugh. “Oh my God. You are so like John. What the hell is the difference between what you said to Carrie and what John said to you about Tex?”

“I…” Bree blinked. “It’s not the same.”

“Why? Because I’m not as important to Carrie as Tex is to you?”

“No. It’s…” God. Did I do that?

“Right. Like John trying to make your boyfriend choose his job or his girlfriend. I bet if Tex left the fire department, John would welcome him to the family.”

“I doubt that.”

“No, I was talking to Mom about it. John’s a little off his rocker about you. It’s not even losing you to the man you marry, but it’s something to do with firefighting and relationships in general. Mom admits he has some issues.”

“Are he and Charlie okay?” She couldn’t bear it if her rocky relationship with her dad affected Charlie in any way.

“Oh, they’re fine. Or rather, Mom is okay. John has some groveling to do. But he loves her, so he will.”

“Good.”

“Do you understand what I’m saying about Carrie?”

Bree nodded. “I do. I was angry and hurt. You didn’t help.”

“I know. I’m good at rubbing people the wrong way.” Melissa paused. “I’ve always been jealous of you. There. Happy now?”

“Why would I be? I only ever wanted a sister. I didn’t want to be better than you. I just wanted to be close to my stepsister.” I just wanted to be loved. The tears came, harder this time, because she’d hurt Carrie without meaning to. Tex had left in a huff, and her father had put a wall between them, something she’d never before had in their relationship.

“Jesus, why me?” Melissa crossed to Bree and pulled her in for a hug. “I’m a bitch, I know. I’m sorry for all the shit I put you through. What can I say? I’m screwed up, but I do love you. Deep, deep down,” Melissa teased. “Come on, Bree. I’m sorry. I was kidding. I do love you, you know. Go ahead and cry it out.”

She did. And when she stopped, she felt worlds better. Enough to wipe her snotty nose on her sleeve deliberately in front of her stepsister.

Melissa grimaced. “That’s disgusting. And annoying that you still look pretty even with all that snot hanging off your nose.”

Bree laughed through her tears and found a box of tissues. After blowing her nose and wiping her eyes, she returned to find Melissa on the couch, sipping wine.

“Thanks. I needed that.”

“Yeah, you did.” Melissa put her glass down and toyed with her hair, something she’d always done when she was anxious. “Let’s get this out there once and for all.”

“Okay. Let’s.”

“My mom married your dad. I loved him right away. He became my dad. Charlie became your new mom.”

“Yep.”

“You were everything I’d always wanted in a sister. And it was good. At first.”

Bree nodded.

Melissa sighed. “I… I was used to being the pretty girl. Then there you were.”

“But—”

“Stop, I know you’re going to tell me I’m pretty too. I am. I know. But back then, you didn’t seem to realize how pretty and nice you were, how much every fucking body seemed to love you, which made it worse. So, yes, I had a hard time trying to deal with a new life where I had to share the spotlight. I missed my dad so much. And then I just grew unlikable.

“I hated myself, and I wanted to feel better. So, I started doing things to make people like me. A lot of it had to do with boys and being popular. I’m not proud of it, but I know why I acted out now.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Me too.” Melissa shook her head. “I know we can’t go back and undo the past, but you and I don’t have to be enemies. I did things to hurt you and never apologized. You kept me at a distance because of it. It was my fault, I know, but—”

“I’m sorry. You’re right. You hurt me so long ago, and I built walls and kept you out, even when you tried to reach out to me. I did keep that charm bracelet you gave me though.” Melissa’s atonement back then had been to offer Bree her favorite bracelet.

“You did?” Melissa flushed. “I felt so bad after I kissed Kurt. But I wanted to hurt you. So I did, and I hurt myself worse. But trust me, I did you a favor with Doug in tenth grade. He was such a jerk.”

“Then thanks.” Bree smiled.

Melissa gave a hesitant smile back. “High school was so many years ago, but sometimes you can feel it as if it happened yesterday.”

“I know. But that was all the time we really had together. Since then, either you or I am always gone.”

“Until recently.”

“Yeah.”

A pregnant pause.

Bree needed to know. “How is Carrie, really?”

Melissa sighed. “She was fire-breathing mad at me after you stormed off three weeks ago. I put Carrie in an unfair position, and I’m so sorry about it. She hasn’t been trying to avoid you though. She’s been seriously busy with a new case at work. But I know it hurt her when you just left and acted like she’d betrayed you. You should never make a person choose between friends, Bree. I mean, that’s something the old me might have done. You’re supposed to be the nice one.”

Bree flushed. “I know that. I never meant it, but I was angry, and I took it out on Carrie, which was a stupid thing to do.”

“As stupid as John asking Tex to choose between loving his career and loving you. Why can’t he love both?”

“We never talked about love.” Bree shook her head, baffled. “We’ve only been dating a little while.”

“That’s not what Carrie told me. She said you guys have history.”

“Technically, we do.” Bree thought back to first talking to Tex on the phone and smiled. “He was so smooth, so handsome, full of Texan charm and swagger. I fell for him. But then we had a bunch of problems, over before we could get started. He never quit though. Every time we ran into each other, he pursued me.”

“Even volunteered to show the hot photographer around, despite the mighty battalion chief’s warnings.”

“Yeah.” She blinked to clear more tears. “I just don’t see what my dad gets out of this. Making Tex miserable? Making me unhappy? All that talk about couples who divorce, yet he’s the one making me and Tex fight. We don’t always get along, but this stress is ridiculous. And unnecessary.”

And something she intended to put a stop to, once and for all.

“I think I need legal representation to help me deal with my father.” At Melissa’s raised brow, she clarified, “For moral support, you goof. I’m not suing Dad anytime soon.”

“I know a good lawyer.” Melissa grinned, downed the rest of her wine, and stood. “Let’s take my car.”

“Let’s take mine. You just shotgunned my Merlot.”

“You know, we’re not just going to be besties and start doing whatever you want because I apologized,” Melissa said, her tone lofty.

“Oh, cram it. Carrie’s my best friend, and she rarely does what I tell her to.”

“That’s true.”

“What are your intentions regarding Carrie?” Bree asked on the way out the door.

Melissa blinked, and a hint of pink dusted her cheeks. “I don’t know what you mean.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Nice try. But we’re dealing the mess of your life right now. Not mine.”

“It’s not going to be a mess for much longer. Not if I have anything to say about it.”

“There you go. That’s the spirit. But if the first words out of your mouth when we see Carrie aren’t ‘I’m sorry,’ I will straight up yank out your hair and punch you in the face.”

Bree huffed. “I’d like to see you try…Smelly Melly.” Melissa’s loathed nickname. Immature, yet it had a weird kind of cachet.

“Sometimes I do hate you.” Melissa was trying not to laugh.

“I love you too.”

***

Tex hated arguing, and he and Bree had been damn near perfect partners until now. It made sense they’d have some fights. Hell, they argued all the time about little things, but that’s what gave their relationship zing. Tonight had been bad. Not fun, and more than troublesome.

Was this woman, who could possibly think he only wanted to be with her to hurt her dad, someone he should risk his career over?

Firefighting was his life. His passion.

But…so was Bree. He loved her. She meant everything to him.

In a world where he could live without firefighting or without Bree, he’d choose her any day. But why should he have to choose?

He went to bed feeling tired and sick and woke up for work early the next day. He exercised, his appetite nonexistent, and did what he was told. A brief bright spot in his day was a small teaching moment at the local elementary school, where the kids could check out the engine and ask questions.

Not the best assignment, but much better than cleaning the ladder truck and checking inventory while everyone else went out on a call.

He finished his shift and decided to talk to Bree, face-to-face, because not being with her felt wrong.

But as he drove home to clean up, he wondered if maybe they should take a break. Would distance bring them closer or prove what the chief wanted to happen? That they’d be better apart?

Tex spent the better part of the day dithering over his choices. But by early evening, he’d cleaned up and had just finished brushing his hair when someone knocked at the door.

He walked to answer it and saw something sticking out from under the couch.

Bubbles’s toy duck.

Great. Now he felt all kinds of down.

The one good thing about Bubbles being gone was that she hadn’t been affected by his new schedule. Or his need to be doing something, anything, to keep his mind from the mess his life had become. He’d lost weight, growing leaner. And meaner, according to Mack.

Man, he missed the guys.

Work had always been a job until he’d found his calling fighting fires and helping people. A job he loved.

Now, not so much. And he hated that as much as he hated missing Bree.

He reached the door and opened it to let Bree inside.

“Hey.” He wanted to kiss her.

She looked tired. “Hey.”

He stepped back so she could enter. Would she break up with him now? Break his heart after her father finished his career?

Did he care anymore?

Dumb question. Hell, yeah, he cared.

“Let’s talk,” he said.

She sighed. “Fine. You’re in charge.”

“Damn skippy.”

A hint of a smile. Progress.

“Something to drink?” he asked.

“No.”

They stood facing each other in the living room. Nothing at all comfortable about this moment. And none of it made any sense. But Tex felt like it was time to lay it all out, go big or go home. He had choices, and he was about to make the biggest one of his life.

“This whole mess is confusing. It should be between a guy and his gal. Not between a guy and his gal and her father.”

“I agree.”

“Bree, let me say this, okay? Just, wait till I get it all out.”

She nodded. Her hair didn’t seem as shiny. She looked pale, her eyes bloodshot. And still, his heart felt so full with her in his life in any way.

“When I met you, it was as if something clicked inside me. I’ve been alive for twenty-nine years. Been around the world, lived in different parts, met all kinds of people. But none like you. I love how you look. I won’t lie. But there are a ton of pretty gals out there. You have what they don’t. I don’t know what it is, but I know it when I see you smile, hear you laugh, watch you take pleasure in beating me at mini golf or trying to beat me in a race,” he added and saw her smile. “I’ve never felt for a woman what I feel for you. And I don’t know if it’s right or wrong, I only know when you’re not around, everything is a little less bright.”

His hands felt cold, and nerves kept him off-balance, but it had to be said. “Bree, I fucking love you. I don’t know when it first happened. It might be too soon. It might be too late. But it just is. And when your daddy tries telling me I have to pick between the woman I love and my calling, it don’t sit right.” He took a deep breath then let it out. “But if I had to choose, I—”

She put a finger over his lips, her eyes shining. Then a tear slid over her cheek, and his heart cracked.

“Damn, girl. Don’t cry. Bree, I—”

“Tex, do you mean it? Do you really love me?”

Nothing mattered but this moment.

He stared into her blue eyes, seeing in them a reflection of the man he wanted to be. “I surely do. With all I am. And I choose you, Bree.”

She smiled and wiped her tears. “Well, if someone asked me to choose between my photography and you, what do you think I would say? I’ll tell you. I’d say no.”

His heart crumbled. She didn’t love him back?

“Because no one should have to make that kind of choice. There’s no life-ending decision to be made. No good reason you shouldn’t do the job you’ve been born to do while enjoying life with the woman you love. And no reason I should have to give up my passion in order to be with the man I love.” She looked up at him and smiled. And it was as if the sun shone on them.

Until he realized it really was. The blinding glare came from the sun spearing through a cloud. He smiled. “I think we got the go-ahead from whoever’s upstairs.”

She laughed and hugged him as he lifted her up for a heartfelt kiss.

When they parted, they were both breathing heavy.

She gave him a peck on the lips and told him to put his shoes on. “Why?” she repeated when he asked. “Because I’m done dealing with this. And so are you. No, I know you told me to let you handle this. But we both know a union rep can’t do anything about treatment that’s fair and legal, but underneath, in the spirit of being a good boss, it’s really not. We’re going to fix this. And if my father thinks he can dictate my life, he’s in for a world of hurt.”

“I don’t want to come between you and your dad, Bree.”

“Well, you are. And I wouldn’t have you anywhere else but right next to me.”

He gripped her hand and brought it to his lips. “Best thing I ever did was swipe right, huh?”

“You got that right, cowboy. Now let’s fix this mess.”

“Guns drawn?” he teased as he found his sneakers.

“You bet your tight, sexy ass.”