Age of Ava by Melanie Moreland

Chapter 17

Ava

Istared out the window at the water, pulling my legs up to my chest. I wrapped my arms around my knees, laying my cheek on them. From the great room, I heard laughter and the snippets of many conversations. I felt removed and tired today.

So tired.

I still had no idea what to think about Hunter’s announcement yesterday. That his grandfather had listed me as a beneficiary if he never showed up. It also explained the way he hissed, “You’re her,” the day I introduced myself.

Why would Mr. Owens list me as the second beneficiary?

I had always tried to be nice to Mr. Owens. I checked on him, made sure he had supplies. My family looked after him behind the scenes, but he never shared anything personal. Never told me about his grandson. He would talk of his wife, Gail. Share the occasional story. At times, seem lost in memories. But Hunter’s name never passed his lips. His plans for the house were never brought up.

I sighed, shutting my eyes and rolling my shoulders.

Hunter’s words, his story, kept flitting through my mind. The pain he kept hidden. The emotional toll his childhood had taken on him. His refusal to even consider that he could have a different kind of life, that he was different from his mother. He couldn’t see it. He couldn’t see how incredible he was or how capable he was of caring. Loving.

I wiped the tears that kept coming, drying my face with my sweatshirt. I had done exactly what I swore I wouldn’t do. What I never planned to happen. I was falling in love with Hunter Owens. Despite the difference in our childhoods, the ten-year age gap between us, how we viewed things, somehow we fit. I felt different in his company. He had a way of making me feel safe. Protected. Yet not in an overbearing, coddling way. He let me be me. He loved my bossiness and quirks. But he also made me safe enough to show my weaker side. Nothing felt as good as lying on his chest, listening to his low baritone voice as he read to me. Feeling his arms around me in the night when I would wake up. His humor and the sound of his laughter that seemed to surprise him when it happened—as if he weren’t used to hearing himself amused.

And the way he saw me. He knew when I was tired. When I needed to be held. He saw through all my defenses and underneath the bluster I had perfected to the real me. And he allowed me to show it, and in his own special way, he surrounded me, helping me find my strength.

Except, maybe I had pushed him too far. After telling me his past yesterday, he had shut down. He stood and went outside, working on the railings. I joined him, but things were strained. I wasn’t sure if he regretted telling me, if he felt I had overstepped, or if he simply needed some time to process the entire conversation. When Gracie had texted me, asking for some help, he seemed grateful for the reprieve. He kissed me and sent me off with a smile, but his lips had barely brushed mine, and there had been no indication of any plans to see me later. After I walked out of view through the break in the trees, I had paused. There was no sound behind me, no nail gun, nothing. I stepped off the path and peeked through the trees. Hunter stood, bent over the railing, his head hanging down, his shoulders hunched in defeat. I waited, wanting him to come after me, to call out—but he didn’t. I was desperate to go back to him and wrap my arms around him, but I knew he wouldn’t like it, and I couldn’t bear the rejection that would follow. My footsteps dragged all the way back to my house.

He hadn’t called or texted, and my back door hadn’t opened all night. I spent the night tossing and turning, and this morning had dragged myself from bed, looking haggard and feeling lousy.

A cup of coffee appeared in front of me. I lifted my head and met my mom’s worried gaze. She sat across from me, sipping her coffee in silence. Finally, she spoke.

“Are you all right, Ava?”

“I’m good. It was a long week.”

“So your brother told us. Your father is worried.”

I shrugged. “It happens, Mom. You know yourself, dealing with people is hard. Some harder than others. I’ve had a bad stretch lately.”

“Maybe you need a break.”

I gazed past her to the water outside, mesmerized as always by the variant of colors in the lake as the waves rolled.

“You haven’t taken a break in a long time,” she continued.

“Things have been too busy,” I agreed.

“Ava.”

Her tone caught my attention, and I met her gaze. She looked concerned, her green eyes clouded with worry.

“Life is too short to do nothing but work.”

“I know.”

“Ronan said you’re getting some help. You need to take advantage of that and have a holiday.”

I rubbed my temples. “I’ll talk to Addi about it.”

She leaned close, laying her hand over mine. “Is there something else?”

I forced a smile. “What else could there be?”

“Maybe a certain neighbor has caught your attention?”

“Ronan has a big mouth,” I groused.

She shook her head. “Ronan didn’t say anything. I see the way your gaze looks in that direction. I’ve dropped by a few times, and you’re not home but your car is there. Once I came, and I heard the sound of a male voice—” she held up her hand before I could protest “—and a dog. Hunter has a dog.” Then she smiled, her voice filled with affection. “And I know my daughter. You’ve been crying, and that is unusual. Something is troubling you. Something is on your mind. I think the same thing that was on Hunter’s mind the day I saw him. Each other.”

I sighed. “Mom, it’s complicated.”

She waved her hand. “This entire family thrives on complicated.”

“He doesn’t want to be part of this family. Part of any family. It’s not serious between us. It’s just a ‘for now’ thing.” I smiled ruefully. “I know it’s not what you want to hear, but it’s the truth.”

She regarded me shrewdly. “Is it?”

I looked down, picking at an imaginary thread on my shirt. “It is for him.”

“But for you?”

“It doesn’t matter. I agreed to the terms. He was very clear.”

“People can change their minds.”

I shook my head, sadness wrapping around my heart. “Hunter is steadfast in his determination. He-he’s damaged, Mom. His upbringing was as bad as Dad’s. Very similar to Maddox’s. Neglect and pain. He’s convinced he can’t love. That life holds nothing for him but an endless trail of searching.”

“Then help him find what he is searching for.”

“He won’t let me.” I swallowed. “I think, maybe this time, love and patience aren’t enough.”

“Only you can decide that. I hate to see you suffer.”

“I hate seeing him suffer when he doesn’t have to.”

She took my hand. “I can’t tell you what to do. But I will say this. Love doesn’t always have an HEA like the books we read. If this relationship hurts you, you need to step away. If he can’t return your feelings, he isn’t the one for you. But if you want to fight for him, then fight. But don’t fight forever. Nothing and no one are worth that sort of pain. As hard as it is, you have to decide what is right for you. But don’t lose yourself doing it. Because you are too special, my girl. And if Hunter can’t see that, then the problem is his, not yours. Don’t let him rob you of that.”

She stood and kissed my forehead the way she had when I was a child. I inhaled her comforting scent of jasmine and floral. She patted my cheek and walked away, leaving me alone with my thoughts.

I only wished they weren’t such a jumbled mess in my head.

* * *

Monday and Tuesday were endless. I felt as if part of me were missing. I longed to hear Hunter’s voice. To see his face, feel his touch. I didn’t know if telling me his history had been too much for him or if it all had been too overwhelming. Me, my brothers, the house. Or perhaps, as he suggested, his need to move on had hit him and he’d decided to distance himself now.

I went through the motions. Attended meetings, interviewed some candidates for my assistant plus the extra body Addi wanted in the office to take care of all the filing and general work that needed to be handled for all of us. He or she would help out in all areas, going where required, and learning about all aspects of the business.

“I liked him,” Addi mused, holding up a résumé. “He was a straight shooter. Open.” She smirked. “Outspoken. He’d represent us well.” She flipped the page. “With his experience, he’d take a lot off your plate.”

“Yes, I liked Robert too. He’s used to much more responsibility, though. Will he be happy being part of a team?”

She regarded me quietly, a small frown pulling down her lips. “He’s looking to cut back since his wife gave birth. He was honest about that. I think he’d be thrilled to be part of a great team here.” Addi’s short nails made a clicking sound as she tapped them on the top of her desk. “And frankly, you need the help. And a holiday.”

I met her concerned eyes and shook my head, silently begging her not to go there right now. She frowned again but nodded. “We also need to hire a couple of good foremen and create some new teams. I am tired of the bullshit we’re going through hiring outside teams. I know it saves us money with salaries and benefits, but I’m not happy with the attitudes and problems we’re running into. I discussed it with Dad, and he agrees.”

“I agree.”

“Okay. I’m calling Robert in for a second interview. We’ll get him settled plus another body for more office staff, and I’ll get Ronan and Brayden to start fleshing out teams. I think two smaller ones would be good. We have enough projects coming up, we can use them.”

“Sounds good.”

I stood to leave, getting to the door before Addi called my name. “Ava.”

I turned, meeting her gaze.

“I’m here. If you want to talk. Anything. All you have to do is ask.”

All I could do was nod.

I pulled into the driveway, leaving the SUV there. I rarely parked inside the garage during the summer. I headed inside, dropping my purse on the bench and kicking off my shoes. Padding toward the kitchen, I stopped at the sight of my pot sitting on the counter. The last time I had seen it had been at Hunter’s. My gaze flew around the room, and my shoulders dropped when I realized he wasn’t there. He had brought it back and left.

Dejected, I turned to go to my room and change.

Except, the back door flew open, and Hunter stood there. He looked unkempt, his hair wild as if he’d run his fingers through it a hundred times, his beard longer than normal. His eyes were intense, the icy blue a scorching inferno of anger and frustration. He walked in, slamming the door behind him. We stood separated by ten feet, yet I felt his touch as sure as if he were right in front of me.

“Goddammit, Ava,” he growled, stalking toward me.

I couldn’t speak.

“I can’t get involved with you. Not the way you want. Don’t you get it?”

“Get what?” I managed to ask.

“I will use you until I’m done. Then I’ll walk. And I can’t do that. Not to you.”

“Why?” I whispered.

He gripped my arms. “Because I do care. Somehow, you’ve gotten under my skin. Your toughness and your smart mouth. Your fucking delicious spaghetti. The way you make me laugh. I fucking crave you. Every minute you’re not within my sight, I want you back.” He shook me slightly. “Physically, I can’t get enough of you. But I can’t give you more. I care, but not the way that you want—that you need—me to care.” He barked out a bitter laugh. “I care just enough to not want to hurt you. Which hurts me.”

I dared to cup his cheek. “It hurts me too.”

“I’ve struggled to stay away from you. It’s better that I do. I only came to bring back your pot. But when I came inside, all I could smell was you. Inhale the fragrance that is all you. I heard your car, so I left. But I couldn’t go.” He leaned into my hand. “Fuck, I couldn’t go.”

I moved my fingers on his skin, skimming over his cheek and the roughness of his beard. “But you can’t stay either?” I asked.

He met my eyes, and I saw the sorrow in them. “No.”

I made a decision.

“Then stay for now. Let me have you for as long as you can stay. Give me that, at least.”

“But—”

I silenced him with my finger. “The future will be what it is. But I want you while you’re here. When you go, I won’t beg. But right now, I am begging. Begging for you to stay with me now. Just for now.”

He crushed me to him, his mouth covering mine. Instantly, all the pain, confusion, and loneliness evaporated. He wrapped his arms around me, his embrace tight, his kiss passionate and possessive. His tongue slid along mine in sensuous passes, and he lifted me, one hand on the back of my neck, the other cupping my ass. I felt the urgency in his touch, the power in his kiss. The way his fingers stroked restlessly on my skin. The rumble of satisfaction in his chest. I ran my fingers over his neck and shoulders in a long, repeated pattern, sliding them into his hair at the nape of his neck, pressing them into the tight muscles. He relaxed under my touch, his kisses becoming more leisurely, less urgent. But no less drugging.

He dragged his mouth across my cheek, down my neck, his tongue hot and wet on my skin. He tugged on my earlobe. “I want you, Little Dragon. Can I have you?”

“Yes,” I answered simply. I would take what he offered. Whatever he offered. When it was over, I would deal with the aftermath then. But for now, he was there. With me. That was all that mattered.

He swung me into his arms, carrying me down the hall. The whole time, he kissed me, his mouth hard on mine, trailing over my skin, down my neck, his breath hot against me.

In my room, he set me on my feet, still kissing me, our hands tugging and pulling at the clothing that separated us. The sheets were cool under my sensitive skin as we fell onto the mattress, his weight pinning me down. He felt hot, his touch urgent. Everything was magnified. How he tasted, the way his hands felt gripping my hips, his deep breathing. I cried out as he drew a nipple into his mouth, sucking and biting. He used his lips and tongue on my skin, lavishing me in caresses. He stroked me with his fingers, finding my center and sliding along my clit with a deft touch. I arched into him, begging and pleading. For what, only he knew, and he gave it to me.

We were all over the bed. I was under him, on top, pressed to his chest, then finally on my stomach. After grabbing a condom, he drew up my hips and entered me from behind, the angle intense, the feel of him acute. He began to move, kissing my back and neck, turning my head to capture my mouth. He slid his fingers back to my clit and strummed in time with his thrusts, ramping the pleasure so high I wept. My orgasm bloomed, unfurling low in my stomach, its tendrils far-reaching. I gripped the sheets, pushing my body up closer to the pleasure as I came, trembling, crying, and moaning Hunter’s name. He sat up, taking me with him, my back pressed to his chest. He pressed his lips to my ear, groaning and cursing, his frame vibrating as his cock swelled inside me, setting off yet another orgasm that shook me to my core as he thrust wildly, his release a long, drawn-out sigh escaping his mouth.

He dropped his head to my shoulder, our heavy breathing the only sound. My tears dripped heedlessly down my cheeks, landing on his skin. He reared back, turning my face to his.

“No, no, Little Dragon,” he crooned, shifting us so he wrapped his arms around me, holding me tight. He dropped kisses to my face, brushing away the tears. “No crying. Please. Are you hurt? Was I too rough? Tell me,” he pleaded, running his hands along my arms and torso. “Where—tell me where?”

“Not-not hurt,” I assured him. I had no idea how to tell him. What to say that wouldn’t push him away. How did I tell him I was so happy he was here with me? That he filled a need within me I didn’t understand, and I knew would be empty once he left. That I was certain I would never recover from, yet was powerless to resist?

“Just overwhelmed,” I whispered. “That was intense.”

He lay back, taking me with him. He kept me close, pulling a blanket over us.

“It’s always intense with you.” He pressed a kiss to my head.

“Don’t stay away again,” I said quietly. “I know it’s not forever, but I have you for now and—”

He stopped me from saying anything else with a press of his fingers on my mouth.

“I won’t,” he promised.

I settled back to his chest, feeling safe.

“Sleep a bit, then we’ll talk,” he promised. “We can go see Cash. He’s missed you.”

I felt sleep pulling me under as he spoke again, the words so quiet, I wasn’t sure if they were real or not.

“But not as much as I did, Little Dragon.”

* * *

The pattern of my life changed in a subtle fashion over the next while. I went to work, handling my job with a renewed sense of purpose. I issued orders, filed plans and paperwork, and attended meetings, my head somehow clearer. Taking a page from Hunter’s book, I focused on now. Nothing else.

Addi hired Robert, and I was looking forward to his starting with the company. Having some help would remove some of the stress from my plate. It would take him some time to settle, but I was sure he would fit in well.

The biggest change was the end of my workday. I was never certain when I opened my door if Hunter would be waiting. Leaning against my counter, lounging on the sofa, stretched out on my bed. I never knew where I would find him. If he wasn’t there, I knew he was waiting at his house, and I would change and make my way up the path to his place. Cash always greeted me with excited woofs, a wagging tail, and his favorite game of trying to trip me as he wound his way around my legs over and again.

Hunter always greeted me with one of his slow grins, a tight embrace, and a kiss deep enough to make my toes curl. Every night was spent in his arms. My favorite part of the day was resting on his chest, listening to his rich voice read out loud. The day, the worries, everything faded away as I lost myself to him, his voice, and the stroke of his gentle touch.

I pulled up to the house and went inside, the silence telling me Hunter wasn’t there. But on my bed was a note, and I picked it up, scanning it quickly.

Busy day.

Can I interest you in a late dinner for four for two?

I promise to fill you up an hour later…

H

I grinned at his words, then changed, heading toward the back door. A knock on my front door stopped me, and I retraced my steps, opening the door to admit Gracie. She grinned at me.

“I thought I saw your car.”

“Come in,” I offered.

“No, just wanted to make sure you were still okay for tomorrow?”

At my blank look, she chuckled. “The barbecue on Sunday. You, Addi, Paige, and I are in charge of appetizers and snacks.”

“Right. My goodness, the last couple of weeks have gone by fast,” I mused.

“So, we need to go shopping and do the prep tomorrow.”

My heart sank, knowing I would have to leave Hunter sooner than I planned. As well as Sunday since it was always an all-day thing with the family barbecues. I hadn’t mentioned it to him again, and he hadn’t brought it up. Either he had forgotten, or he was simply avoiding the subject. I had a feeling I knew which it was. I forced a smile to my face.

“Okay, what time?”

“I thought midafternoon. We can grab what we need and get it done. Maybe watch a movie and have wine after? Jaxson is going to take care of Kylie.”

“Sounds good.”

“We’re sticking to the menu we planned, right?”

I grabbed my phone and looked at my notes, scanning the items. Neither Gracie nor I was fond of cooking, but we did rock the appetizers.

“I think this should work. I already have the chicken in the marinade in the freezer, so that saves us time.”

“I made the stuffed mushroom filling today. Jaxson found these huge mushrooms yesterday, so that’s all done,” Gracie said.

“Then we’re ahead of the game. How about I pick you up at three?”

“Sounds good.” She paused. “Any plans for tonight?”

“I’m having Chinese with a friend.”

She bit back a smile. “The friend I saw peek through your back window a moment ago?”

“Ah.” I cleared my throat. Hunter was here? The thought that maybe he was as anxious to see me as I was to see him made my heart rate speed up.

“Did you invite him to the barbecue?”

“He’s not much for family stuff.”

“This family or any family?”

“Any.”

“But you’re having dinner with him.”

“We’re friends.”

“Friends?” she asked, her eyes dancing. “Close friends?”

“Temporary friends. He’ll be leaving soon.”

She pursed her lips. “That’s too bad.”

“Why would you say that?”

“I assume he’s the reason behind the bounce in your step lately. The way you smile more.”

I shrugged, not wanting her to know how deeply I felt for him. I had to keep that piece of information to myself. If she knew, if somehow Hunter found out… No, I had to keep it hidden.

“We scratch an itch for each other.”

She laughed. “That’s what Jaxson thought.”

“You’re different.”

“If you say so.” She kissed my cheek. “Go and have a nice dinner. I’ll see you tomorrow. If you’re a little late, no big deal.” She winked and left, laughing as she shut the door behind her.

I hurried to the back door and pulled it open. Hunter sat on the step, turning as I came out. I settled beside him, and he bumped my shoulder.

“Hey, Little Dragon.”

“You could have come in,” I told him.

“I didn’t want to interrupt.”

“More like you didn’t want to meet another member of my family.”

He chuckled, but he didn’t deny it.

“I have to go shopping with Gracie tomorrow and make some stuff for Sunday.”

He stared straight ahead. “Right. Sunday. Your family barbecue.”

I hummed and waited for him to say more.

“What time do you have to leave tomorrow?”

“I have to pick her up at three.”

He stood and held out his hand. “Well, let’s go. I’m starving.”

I let him pull me up, not asking the burning question.

I was too damn scared to hear his answer.

* * *

We slid into a booth at the restaurant, and Hunter grinned. “Should I bother looking at the menu?”

I laughed. “The dinner for three is okay too, just not as good. No shrimp.”

“God forbid.”

Mrs. Yeo came over, smiling. “Ava, how good to see you.” She glanced at Hunter. “Who is your friend?”

“This is Hunter. Ah, he’s my neighbor.”

She lifted her eyebrows. “I wish I had a neighbor like him.”

Hunter laughed, not at all taken aback by her teasing.

“Nice to meet you.”

“You too.” She glanced at me. “Usual?”

“Yes.”

“I have beans tonight. Asparagus too.”

“Oh, add those, please!”

She walked away laughing, and Hunter chuckled. “More food?”

“Her spicy green beans and asparagus are to die for. She only adds them to the menu when she can get them fresh. I can’t pass those up.”

“So, dinner for four plus two extra dishes.”

I shrugged. “I worked hard today. Built up an appetite.”

He eyed me slowly, leaning low over the table. “I’ve got an appetite too, Little Dragon. You gonna satisfy that later?”

“If you’re lucky.”

He sat back, grinning. “Oh, I’m feeling it tonight.”

I grinned back. I had a feeling he was right.