His Twisted Heart by Ellie R Hunter
Chapter Twenty-Four
Sara
Ican’t bring myself to get out of the car. Sitting by the curb, it’s close enough to my father’s burned down house, only half of it still standing. After everything he put me through, I thought if I left, I would be able to forget him and my life here, but it hasn’t been so easy. Little things like certain songs or TV shows would remind me of my childhood. The smell of certain foods would remind me of pissing my father off enough for him to beat me. It was always over the tiniest reasons. It didn’t matter how far I ran; he was always there.
I can’t remember a time when I wasn’t in pain during my childhood. Even when I spent most of my time with Luca, he only distracted me from it. As much as he wanted to take it away, he couldn’t.
My Luca.
Seeing him this morning blew me away. I didn’t for one second believe I’d see him at my father’s funeral. He’s certainly different, but I could still see my Luca in him. He was the only one who gave a crap about me, and even after all this time, he kept his promise to kill my father. Back then, it was a pipe dream. I never thought he’d follow through, especially after I ran and left him. Even during the harder times, I never thought about returning home to my father, but I constantly thought about Luca and our last night together.
The McCarthy’s are so nice, but it’s strange sleeping under their roof when I’ve never met them before. Luca’s known India his whole life, but I’ve not ever spoken to her. I desperately wanted to go with Luca and stay at the Jacksons, but I would never argue with Mr. Jackson. I’ll be forever grateful that he showed up and put my father in his place, taking me with him and Luca’s older brother, Leo. Social services will be contacted tomorrow, and the thought of what’s going to come from that makes my stomach hurt.
My phone vibrates under my pillow. Slipping it out, I read a text from Luca. I only have this phone because he purchased it for me. I’ve had to hide it from my father, but it’s been worth it to text back and forth with Luca late at night.
Open your window.
Shutting the phone off, I slip out of bed, rush to the window, and draw the shades to see a dark figure lingering down on the lawn. Opening the window, I lean out and find a ladder perched against the ledge.
“Get your bag and toss it out, then climb down.”
“What’s going on, Luca?” I whisper-shout.
“I’m getting you out of here. Hurry up.”
I quickly pull on my jeans and make the bed. It only seems polite. Tossing my bag out the window, Luca catches it with ease, and tells me to be careful as I twist and climb out.
My heart pounds as I descend to the bottom, and Luca’s there to help me jump down from the third rung.
Keeping my hand in his, he picks up my bag and leads us across the lawn to his truck.
“Where are we going?” I ask as he opens the door for me.
“My mom has a cabin just outside of town. We’ll stay there tonight and leave in the morning.”
“To go where?”
“Wherever we choose.”
The cabin in question is in the middle of nowhere, and far off from the main road. There’s no question about privacy.
Grabbing my bag from the back seat, he climbs out and rounds the truck to open my door for me. He always does this, and I love him even more for it. He never fails to look after me and make me feel like I’m worth something.
If it wasn’t for him, I would have no one who cared if I was alive or not.
“No one’s been here in a while, so it might be dusty,” he warns, unlocking the door.
I expect it to be filthy, but when we step inside and he turns on the lights, I find it’s not so bad. It’s certainly nicer than what I’m used to.
“Won’t anyone show up?”
“Considering it’s late, and there’s no trouble at the club, it’s unlikely we’ll be bothered.”
I follow him upstairs, and see he already has a bag here for himself in one of the bedrooms.
“We should get some sleep so we can get up early.”
“Before anyone notices we’re gone?”
“Yes.”
Sleeping in the same bed as Luca isn’t a big deal to me. It’s happened on quite a few occasions before, and it’s my favourite time with him.
Stripping out of my jeans, I pull back the sheets and shiver when the coldness hits my skin.
“I think one of my aunts comes by and cleans the place every so often,” he murmurs.
I look over to see him stripped down to his boxers, and my mouth goes dry, taking in the sight of him. It’s not the first time I’ve seen him this naked, but it’s the first time alone together in a room, in a cabin on our own.
I know he has feelings for me, and I’ve sensed he’s wanted to take things further between us for a while. I’ve been wanting the same. My only fear is… well, I’m not sure what my fear is. I guess it’s nerves. Once we go further, there’s no going back, and I can’t afford to lose our friendship. He’s all I have, and I fear losing him.
“I can’t believe we’re doing this. Did you sneak out too?”
“My parents stopped off at the club, so I kinda just left. They won’t notice till the morning, and by then, we’ll be long gone. Don’t worry.”
“I’m never worried when I’m with you.”
His smile gets me every time. I’ve noticed he doesn’t smile for everyone, and rarely smiles when I’m not around, which makes them more special to me.
“Your mom will freak out, and your dad will send out his club to look for you,” I point out.
“Probably, but I’ll call them at some point.”
“And say what? Also, how are we going to survive? I don’t have any money.”
“I’ve got us covered. I took twenty thousand from the stash my dad thinks none of us know about.”
Gasping, I sit up, looking down at him. He’s completely relaxed.
“Luca, he’s going to kill you!”
Pulling on my arm, I lay back down and he moves closer, wrapping his arm around me.
“He won’t kill me, Sara. My mom would never let him.”
“This isn’t a joke. Be serious.”
“I am. All I care about is getting you out of this town and somewhere no one will hurt you again. I don’t for one second believe social services will help you. Once your dad sobers up and realises what’s happening, he’ll make up shit to get you home, putting us back to square one.”
“I love you,” I blurt out, and immediately wish the bed would open up and swallow me.
He tenses beside me, and regret starts to drown me.
“You love me, like a friend?”
I take my chances. “More than a friend.”
“Yeah?”
Oh my God! Is he not going to say it back? Have I misread the signs?
“Yes.”
“You don’t know how long I’ve been waiting for you to say it. I love you too, as more than a friend. So much more.”
Leaning over, his hand works its way up from my hip to the side of my face. “I’m going to kiss you now.”
“Good.”
Luca’s soft snores tell me he’s fast asleep. Rolling onto my side, I watch him like a stalker.
He’s prepared to give up his family for me. The idea of leaving town doesn’t bother me, but the more I think about it, the more him leaving with me doesn’t sit right.
No matter what he says, his dad won’t stop looking for him. The thought of having a motorcycle club after us scares me, because if they find us, they’ll do whatever they have to to bring Luca home, and he won’t leave me. Once I leave this town, I can’t come back. I’d rather starve on the streets than sleep under my father’s roof.
Luca has a life here. It’s not right he should have to leave his family for me.
Pressing my lips to his cheek, I savour the touch, placing the memory in back of my mind. I slip out of bed, careful not to wake him, and dress so slowly, I nearly tip over.
There’s an envelope sticking out of his open bag is open, and an envelope sticks out. Carefully plucking it up, I open it to find the money he took from his father.
I feel sick at the thought of leaving him, but even worse when I seriously consider stealing from him.
Technically, it’s not stealing from Luca, but more his dad. I’m sure he’s not going to miss it.
I’m well aware Luca’s dad’s club is into dodgy stuff, and if I promise to repay it one day, then I could class it as borrowing on a long-term basis.
Tucking the envelope into my bag, I put my sneakers on and look over to Luca. He has everything here and he needs to stay.
Creeping out of the room, I wince every time the stairs groan beneath me and sigh when I reach the bottom.
A notepad and pen are by Luca’s keys on the side unit by the door. Scooping up the keys, I grab the pen and leave Luca a note I hope he finds when he wakes.
Guilt weighs heavy on my heart. Luca was right, he deserves an explanation.
Starting the car, I drive out to his parents’ house, but no one’s home. Luca was always trying to get me to go to the club when we were younger, but I never dared go that far from the house in case my dad called for me.
I learned the hard way one time when I went down to the creek with Luca for the day. It was hot out, and he found us a spot where no one else would be. By the time I got home, my dad was livid. He pushed me around until my arm was broken, and then he slapped me until my skin felt like it was on fire because he had to take me to the hospital. He wasn’t even meant to be home from work. Luca made sure he drove me home before he was due to finish his shift.
Driving up to the gates at the club, I roll down my window when a guy steps up to the car.
“How can I help you?” he asks.
“I’m here to see Luca Jackson.”
“Is he expecting you?”
“Um, no, but he’ll want to see me.”
I have no idea if that’s true, but I’m guessing he will. He killed my father and showed up to his funeral.
Stepping aside, the guy waves me through. Parking near the other parked cars, I grab my purse and step out. I take a look around and see a house a few guys walk out of. Opting for the house, I walk across the lot and peer through the open door. Stepping inside, I’m a little surprised to see a bar running along one wall, and various tables and chairs dotted around the space. They even have a pool table out here. Searching through all the men wearing the club’s leather cuts and patches, I spot Luca sitting at the end of the bar.
Taking a deep breath, I move closer to him, careful to manoeuvre around the guys lingering in small groups. The smell of alcohol hits me, and I internally cringe, attempting to breathe through my mouth. It reminds me of my father and pain.
Hearing my heels clack against the floor, Luca looks up, then back down at his drink.
“Twice in one day. How lucky am I?” he snorts.
He throws back the rest of his beer and slams the bottle down.
“You said you wanted answers. I’m leaving town soon, so we won’t have another chance to talk.”
Now he looks at me, and I shy away from the repulsion I see burning in his eyes.
“I owe our friendship closure.”
“Friendship?” he huffs.
“Please, Luca. Is there somewhere we can talk?”
The guys closest to us keep looking over. If I’m going to be humiliated, I’d rather it happen without witnesses.
I’m relieved when he slips off the stool and jerks his head toward a set of stairs. Following behind him, he leads me to a room at the end of the hall and pushes open the door, letting me walk in first.
He told me many stories about this place and what happened under this roof, and he always vowed he wouldn’t live this life. His room is scarce of furniture, but it’s clean and tidy.
“We’re alone, so talk.”
He’s so cold now. I understand it’s because I hurt him, but it still catches me off guard. He used to be so sweet to me.
“The truth is, I couldn’t let you ruin your life for me. I had no choice but to run. If you had, your parents wouldn’t have rested until they found you. I would’ve lost you eventually. I left you because it was the right thing to do, and we both know it. Deep down, you know it was right.”
He leans back against the door, blocking my exit.
“There hasn’t been a single day I haven’t thought about you.”
Tearing my gaze from him and his admission, my eyes land on a Polaroid perched against a photo frame of Luca with a girl I recognise, but can’t place, a cigarette dangling from between his lips while he hauntingly looks at the camera. The girl—damn, what was her name?—has her arm thrown around his neck, showcasing a carefree smile. It’s like looking at dark and light, but somehow, they both fit, like they belong together.
Picking it up, I take a closer look. The girl is beautiful, so pretty in a natural way. Her wavey hair is tousled, with braids running through it. Her lips are plump and perfectly pink. Her eyes are lined with eyeliner, but smudged just enough that she pulls it off.
Jealously pooling in my stomach, I turn to Luca. “Doesn’t your girlfriend have a problem with you thinking of me every day?”
Crossing the room, he plucks the picture from my hand and shoves it in the dresser drawer.
“She isn’t my girlfriend.”
I look up into his green eyes.
“You say you didn’t want to ruin my life, but did you ever stop to think of what I wanted? I wasn’t prepared to leave everything and everyone I knew because you were my friend. I loved you, Sara, and when I woke up alone to find you and your stuff gone, it broke me in ways that’ll never heal. You told me that night that you loved me, and then you ran, not believing we would’ve been stronger together.”
Stepping even closer, he cups my cheeks in his large, warm hands, bringing me a feeling of safety like only he could.
“I’ve seen pain, blood, and death since you’ve been gone, but none of it hit me harder than you running out on me.”
His face doesn’t match his words. Something worse has happened to him, but I don’t push.
“Luca…”
Pulling my face from his hold and backing away, I take control of my breathing and say, “I came here to tell you why I left, not because I wanted to reignite old feelings. I’m doing okay for myself, and I live for the future, but you’re the one part of my past I hold dear.”
“Always on your terms.”
“What did you expect? We’d see each other and I’d stay? We were kids, Luca. I’ll never forget what you did for me, but I’ve moved on.”
That’s not technically true. I live my life secluded from others. I live alone, I eat alone, I do everything alone, and that’s the way I like it. It’s safe.
It would be so easy to open up to him like I used to, but it was hard enough leaving the first time, and I can’t make it harder the second time around.
I’m stronger alone, not depending on anyone else. Everything I have now is because of me. I work hard, and I earn every penny I make.
“I guess this is goodbye, then.”
“It’s for the best.”
He doesn’t budge as I move around him and head for the door. It’s not until I’m halfway down the stairs that I hear him following behind me. Once my feet hit the landing, I turn to face him.
“No matter what you think of me, it was good seeing you again.”
“Yeah, it’s been a blast. I’ve waited all this time just for you to walk out on me again.”
“Luca, please, it’s been so long. Let’s say goodbye this time on friendly terms.”
“Never gonna happen. If you’re leaving, just go.”
I’ll never regret leaving him, because it was one hundred percent the right thing to do. His life was here with his family, yet doubt tugs at me as I turn away from him and walk out the door.