For the Heart of a Roguish Duke by Harriet Caves
Chapter Three
Madeline hated waiting for her father to arrive in his study even under the best of circumstances. The conversation she was about to have with him wasn’t the best of circumstances. At every ball that she had attended with her step-mother and step-sister, Georgiana had managed to humiliate her in some way.
Of course, her father wasn’t likely to see it that way. Madeline didn’t know why, but somehow the Earl had always thought the worst of her, no matter what happened. But you do know why, Madeline, she thought, trying not to fidget in the seat she had taken to wait for her father. It’s because your eyes scare him. Just like everyone else.
Her mother had never felt that way toward her, and that made her father’s reactions even harder to bear. If her mother could love her, could even compliment her unusual eyes, why did her father avoid her? The Earl of Ponsonby was not known for being superstitious. Madeline shifted in her seat, glancing at the door to the study.
Her father had left a note with his valet before leaving the house after breakfast, asking Madeline to come to his study when he returned. Madeline had known he would be gone for a few hours, and had taken her time in getting ready. Even if the Earl avoided looking at her face, she had noticed that he usually went easier on her if she was perfectly dressed and composed. If he was going to punish her, she would need something to gain a little goodwill.
The door opened, and Madeline turned to face her father’s desk, as perfectly composed as she could be. As her father entered the room, she rose to her feet. “Good morning, Father,” she said, dropping a curtsy as he stepped around his desk.
“Good morning, Madeline,” her father replied, before sitting down. Whatever business he’d had out in the busy London streets, it hadn’t taken the edge off of what he meant to say to her. Madeline held her head as high as politeness would allow, and tried to keep her expression calm.
“I hope your business went well this morning,” Madeline said, trying to meet her father’s gaze. He avoided looking directly at her eyes, scowling.
“It went as well as could be expected,” he replied. “Now, I need to speak with you, Daughter.”
“Yes, Father,” Madeline said, inclining her head slightly.
“I have heard reports of you at the various balls and gatherings you’ve attended since your debut, Madeline,” the Earl said, his voice settling into a lower register. He cleared his throat. “I am not entirely pleased by them.”
“Father, I have no intention of causing trouble,” Madeline began.
“Whether you have intentions of it or not, you have become the subject of quite a few rumors around town,” her father said firmly. “I understand that when your mother died, there were some gaps in your education as you mourned her. But I had believed until recently that I raised a graceful, elegant woman to be a credit to my name.”
“I know, Father,” Madeline said. “And I am doing my best to be a credit to you! It’s just…Georgiana—” her father didn’t let her finish.
“Georgiana is your sister,” he said, “and she loves you. I will not permit you to cast aspersions on her to remove blame from yourself.”
“But Georgiana is always—she always does things to make me a fool!” Madeline protested. “She spills things on me, or trips me up, and she says the cruelest things about me whenever anyone asks her.”
“You did not grow up with siblings,” her father said. “Some of these things are purely derived from close quarters.”
“Do you love her more than me?” Madeline asked, her voice just above a whisper. It was one of the things she feared the most, the idea that her father loved her step-sisters more than he loved her, his own blood. He had always been distant with her, always a little cold, but he had always been a basically kind father—at least, until her step-mother and step-sisters had arrived.
“Of course, I don’t,” her father said, his tone irritable. “However, Georgiana is mindful of her responsibilities in guiding her own future, as you seem not to be.”
“I am mindful of them!” Madeline protested. “I comprehend what I have to do.”
“I do not believe that to be the case,” her father said. “As such, I feel it necessary to provide incentive for you to do your duty to yourself, our family, and me.”
“What do you mean, Father?” Madeline asked, her heart beating faster in her chest. She pressed her hands together in her lap, squeezing them to try and keep a grip on the situation even as her head began to swim.
“I am setting an ultimatum for you, Madeline,” her father said. “You will find an eligible suitor before this Season is over, or I will be sending you to live with your Aunt Isabella.” Madeline struggled to suppress the urge to scream or faint.
“Papa, please,” she whispered, her eyes stinging with tears that she didn’t want to shed in his presence. Aunt Isabella lived a relatively meager life in York, as a spinster who had never married. Madeline knew that her aunt didn’t consider her life a miserable one, but the idea of spending the rest of her life with an old woman, alone in the north, was mortifying.
“I do not expect you to be married at the end of the Season,” her father pointed out. “But you must have an eligible suitor, and be courting, before this Season ends.” Madeline closed her eyes tightly, willing the tears in them not to fall. But it was no use.
“But what if no man wants me?” she asked quietly. That was what Georgiana kept saying. That no man would want her, and how could one?
“Then I would think it would rather be a relief to have your status settled sooner than later,” her father pointed out. “You will be able to put aside the trouble and effort, and I will ensure that you have a decent living.”
“But…but…not all women find eligible suitors in their first Season,” Madeline continued.
“Most women put more effort into trying,” her father countered. Madeline wanted to scream at her father that, of course, she was trying. One of the dearest wishes she had entertained ever since her mother had died was to find someone to truly love her. But that would only invite more wrath, and it was obvious that her father wouldn’t change his mind.
“I understand, Father,” she said quietly.
“Then we shall go into the dining room, and have our lunch” her father said. The kitchen servants knew that the master of the house was home, and the meal would be served soon.
She managed to stop the tears falling from her eyes, and to blot her face dry with her handkerchief, but Madeline knew her step-sister would see. Georgiana would know immediately that she had been crying, and would want to know the cause. And worse than her father’s ultimatum would be her step-sister’s reaction to it.
“Father,” Madeline said quietly, as they both walked to the door of his study. “Would you…could I ask that you not tell Georgiana about this?”
“I would not share disciplinary choices with another child,” her father replied. “But Henrietta knows about my decision.”
If Henrietta knew, then Georgiana would know, too. Henrietta had likely told her daughter already, thinking that she would impress on Georgiana the importance of stopping her tricks and pranks. Instead, Madeline knew, it would only make the torment increase. She sniffled and dabbed at her face, reminding herself that she’d dealt with her step-sister’s jibes and insults before, and that she could do it again.
“Oh, my dear!” Henrietta appeared from the other end of the dining room, and rushed to Madeline, spotting the telltale signs of crying right away. “Oh, my dear, dear girl,” she said, pulling Madeline into her arms and holding her.
“You must have just received the news,” Georgiana said, entering behind her mother. Madeline glanced at her father, who at least looked a little frustrated that Georgiana apparently knew about his ultimatum.
“If you all will endeavor to keep the peace, I wish us to have a pleasant lunch,” her father said. Madeline would have given anything to be able to tell him that she wouldn’t eat, and to go back to her room to be alone. But she wouldn’t be allowed, and her father would only become angrier with her if she tried to insist on it.
Throughout lunch, Madeline tasted nothing, and only replied when either her father or Henrietta spoke to her. Even if she didn’t reply to Georgiana’s comments, she still had to hear them. “Perhaps Maddie would get on better if she received more training in grace and refinement,” Georgiana said at one point, when Madeline had fumbled slightly in getting a slice of cold roast beef onto her plate.
“Darling, your sister is upset,” Henrietta said. “Please be attentive to her distress.”
“She has only herself to blame,” Georgiana insisted. “If she were a more ladylike lady and applied herself properly to attracting a suitor, our father wouldn’t have had to make his ultimatum.”
“My only interest is in making sure that all of my children are properly provided for,” her father said. “Madeline, this is not a punishment. It is merely an incentive to discipline.”
Madeline wanted to tell her father that if it wasn’t meant to be a punishment, he shouldn’t have made it impossible for her to achieve. But that would have been far too rude to go unpunished itself. She would only get deeper in trouble if she said it, and so she said nothing.
“Perhaps Maddie should write to Aunt Isabella and let her know she’ll be moving in this winter,” Georgiana commented. Madeline gripped her fork more tightly.
“I have full confidence that Madeline will put in an appropriate effort and make a good showing of herself,” Henrietta said. Madeline kept her head down and didn’t respond to either.
“You will have to ensure that she has more dancing instruction—she is frightfully clumsy,” Georgiana suggested.
“If you require more lessons, Madeline, you shall have them,” her father said. Why does he agree with her so easily? Madeline wondered. Does he hate me so much?
“At least it will provide some excuse for you to see your sister again, Father, to let Aunt Isabella know,” Georgiana pointed out.
“He will not be leaving for York, because we all have every confidence in Madeline,” Henrietta said firmly. “Attend to your meal.”
As the conversations ebbed and flowed around her, all Madeline could think of was getting away. She had to get away from everyone: her father, her step-mother, her horrible, cruel step-sister—even the servants. There was no one in the house who could help her or soothe her. She racked her brain, trying to decide what to do. She couldn’t just ask to take a walk by herself, of course.
“Father,” Madeline said finally, as the servants cleared some of the dishes off of the table to make room for the next course. “I would like to visit Anne this afternoon, if I may.”
“I will be taking my carriage,” her father said. “I have other business matters to attend to after lunch. But you may take the chaise, if Anne is receiving visitors.” Madeline finished the food on her plate, and excused herself as soon as possible.
She went up to her room quickly, and took a sheet of paper out of her desk drawer. Madeline knew that Anne wouldn’t deny her, that her other step-sister loved her almost as much as Georgiana hated her. Anne was kinder even than Henrietta, always including her and caring for her. Madeline settled in her seat and quickly wrote a note.
My Dearest Sister, Anne. May I call upon you this afternoon? I am in such desperate need of your counsel, I don’t know what I will do with myself if you are busy or unavailable. But if you cannot have me, I will gladly come visit you another day, soon.
Madeline signed the note, and folded it carefully, sealing it with the little ring her father had given her when she had turned twelve and finally started having her own correspondence to keep up with. She hurried downstairs and found one of her father’s servants, Thomas.
“Could you please carry this over to Lady York for me?” she asked, and Thomas nodded.
“My Lord mentioned that you might be visiting Lady York,” Thomas said.
“I hope so,” Madeline said, feeling the tears starting to form in her eyes again. She turned away before Thomas could see them, and hurried back up to her room to change her clothes. She couldn’t imagine that Anne would turn her away, and if her step-sister wasn’t able to invite her over, Madeline decided that she would find some other way to get away from the house and the torment that Georgiana was intent on dishing out.
Madeline changed out of her house clothes and rang for her maid, Elizabeth, to help her get ready to go out. If anyone could help her figure out how to satisfy her father’s ultimatum, it was Anne. And if Anne couldn’t help her, Madeline didn’t know what she would do. She looked at herself in the mirror as Elizabeth came in to do up her stays. “It will all turn out fine,” Madeline promised her reflection.
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