Company Ink by E.L. Lewis

t e n

"Hi, Nessy!" I exclaim, walking into my cousin's violet and plum hued bedroom. Vanessa is perched on a stool in front of a large canvas, paintbrush in hand. I glance over at her newest creation, a proud smile forming on my face. "Wow, that looks beautiful! Even better than the last one."

After the accident, Ness started attending art therapy as a way to improve her motor skills and give her a creative outlet. It was weeks before she could even hold a paintbrush, but now she creates vivid and abstract paintings of the Seattle skyline and nature landscapes.

"Thank you," Ness says quietly, her words vibrating in her throat. She points to a tall, jagged dark figure on the painting. "Guess?"

"Hmm... Space Needle?" I muse, bringing a basket full of hair supplies to her side console table. "Or the Empire State Building?" I scan the rest of the drawing, looking for more familiar landmarks. "Mmm...no. I stick to my original guess. Space Needle."

“Correct!” Ness nods, her face illuminated by her precious smile.

"I'm getting better at this whole abstract art thing, eh? Maybe I can work for the MoMA one day." If I ever end up leaving Seattle, that is.

Ness rolls her eyes and sweet giggles escape her mouth. She points to the array of combs and clips on the table, furrowing her brows. "Why?"

I connect my iPhone to the Bluetooth speaker and put on some melodic background music. "It's Monique's birthday today. We're going to Mamba. I thought maybe you'd like to come. I can do your hair and makeup. We can dress up and go listen to some music. It's Latin night."

Ness's eyes drift to the ground and she shakes her head. "I don’t want to."

I drop down to my knees in front of her and place a desperate hand on top of hers. "Come on, Ness. It'll be fun. You used to love Latin night."

Vanessa's porcelain face contorts into a heart-wrenching frown, her hazel eyes glossing over. "I can't dance."

I bite the inside of my cheek to prevent myself from crying. Fuck, I shouldn't have brought that up. "We don't have to dance, Ness. We can just sit and eat and listen to the music."

Ness shakes her head again, pointing a shaky finger at the canvas. "Busy."

I take a deep solemn breath. Ever since I took her to Jux last year and some fucking asshole called her a retard, Vanessa has passed on every outing. That was the one time I've ever had the cops called on me. I didn't even care. That prick deserved more than just a slap to the face. I think Ness believes that she's a nuisance now. I've told her so many times that she will never be a burden, that she will always be the most important person in my life, but she still refuses to go out with me to places that are bustling with people. Even though I know she'll say no, I keep inviting her out. Maybe I should stop? I hate seeing her face fall every time, seeing her eyes lose their bright light. But I'm hoping that one day, she'll say yes. And if I stop asking her—that day will never come.

I force a smile. "Okay, that's fine, but can I still do your hair? Maybe two fishtail braids?"

Ness nods eagerly, joy returning back to her amber eyes. "Boss?" she asks, raising an inquisitive eyebrow.

I slap a hand over my mouth and chuckle. "You want the tea?"

"Yes, please." Of course, she does.

I grab the hairbrush and begin combing through Ness's long auburn hair. "Well, I went for drinks with him last night and it was uh—interesting."

Ness cranes her head upwards, her eyes expanding with surprise. "Sex?"

"What? No! We just talked."

Ness narrows her eyes as if she doesn't believe me. "Sure."

Once a sass, always a sass.

"If we do it—you'll be the first to know. I promise."

"Okay," Ness says, waving her hand. "More details."

I spend the next hour slowly braiding Vanessa's hair, giving her a play-by-play of my evening with Adrian. I re-do the fishtails three times to make sure that they're perfect. Ness deserves perfection. Ness deserves everything. I owe Ness everything.

Once my playlist comes to an end, I give Ness a tight bear hug and a kiss on the cheek. "I gotta go meet with Monique soon but I'll FaceTime you tomorrow, okay?"

Vanessa gives me a light hug back and I head to the kitchen to say bye to Lucy. My aunt and cousin used to live in a minimalistic bohemian-style houseboat on the Ship Canal but had to move after the accident; the narrow and tight ladder stairs were an issue. Now they live in a one-floor cozy bungalow near Green Lake. With the insurance money from the accident, Lucy was able to afford an upgrade. My uncle chipped in a little money as well, even though they've been divorced for over ten years—he lives in Hawaii now with his new wife. I was always jealous of Ness's dad. He has a completely new life in a completely different state, yet he makes the effort to call Vanessa twice a week. I'm lucky if my dad remembers my birthday.

"Hey, Luce. I'm going to head out now," I call out from the foyer, slipping on my jacket. Is she home? "Luce?"

"I'm coming! I'm coming! I'm just having a marinara emergency!"

"What?" I laugh, sauntering into the kitchen and finding Lucy standing over the oven with red splotches of tomato sauce all over her white shirt. How dare she treat her clothes so recklessly?! "You know there are such things as aprons?"

"Ha ha ha!" Lucy says with dripping sarcasm, pointing to the simmering pot. "I put the heat up too high."

"Regular Chef Boyardee, aren't you?" I pick up a slice of French baguette from the cutting board on the island and dip it into the sauce. "Mmm... that's good. Is it mom's recipe?"

"Sure is. I'm happy you can tell," she laughs, covering the pot with a lid. "Means I followed the recipe correctly." Lucy leans against the kitchen counter and dabs her shirt with a wet rag. Like water will help. She needs club soda. She would know that if she ever opened the blog articles, I forward her. "Speaking of your mom. I just got off the phone with her and she told me some pretty big news."

"Yeah? What was it?" I ask, cringing at her lame attempt to save her satin white blouse. RIP sweet thing. You'll be missed.

"She'll tell you soon. I really shouldn't say anything. It's not my place."

"Seriously?" I cross my arms, annoyed at my aunt for always doing this. "Why would you bring it up if you can't tell me?"

Lucy shrugs, a sheepish smile spreading on her face. "Big mouth?"

"Just a little." I roll my eyes. "At least tell me if it's bad news. Like, should I be worried? Is someone sick... or?"

"No, nothing like that." Lucy pulls me into an apologetic hug. "They'll call you and tell you soon."

So cryptic, as usual. I bet this 'news' is going to be something stupid. The last time my mom made a huge family announcement it was that she 'finally took the plunge and planted hydrangea bushes'.

"Can't wait," I murmur into her shoulder, giving her a lifeless pat on the back. "Alright, I'm going to be late. Let me know if Ness changes her mind and wants to come to Mamba."

Lucy frowns. "She said no again?"

"Yeah, but I expected as much." I pause, a sharp pain pricking my chest. "I don't know what else to do, Luce. Sometimes I think that Ness resents me, that she blames me for what happened."

"Oh honey, you know that's not true. How many times do I need to tell you? It wasn't your fault. It wasn’t anyone's fault. It just—It just happened."

I sigh. "But it is my fault. If I didn't forget—"

"Cassie, stop!" Lucy's voice rises, cutting me off. "Don't do this again. Don't let your mind go there. She's alive, Cassandra, it could be worse. She could've died." Lucy wipes a hot tear off her face. "But she didn't. The best thing you can do for your cousin is live your life—do all the things she might never be able to do, and then share those adventures with her."

I nibble on my bottom lip. "Okay, you're right. I know you're right but sometimes it's hard, Luce. I feel so guilty that she's stuck in this house and I'm out gallivanting with my friends like nothing happened."

"Cassie, what happened, happened. We can't change that, but it shouldn't prevent you from living your life." Lucy puts a comforting hand on my shoulder. "Ness is happy, she's adjusted and she's getting better every day, okay? Keep inviting her out, she'll say yes again at some point. I'm certain."

I let out a deep exhale, nodding my head in understanding. "Alright. I will. As long as you don't think I'm adding to her stress."

"She loves you Cassie and she loves that you always think about her, okay? Don't stop trying. You're a very persuasive person," Lucy laughs. "I'm sure you'll win her over at some point."

I roll my eyes at my aunt's ass-kissing. "Yeah, yeah. Whatever." I pop another piece of bread into my mouth. "Okay, I really do need to go now." I give Lucy one more hug before heading to the front door. "Love you!"

"Love you too!" Lucy calls out as I exit her home. "Don't do anything I wouldn't do!"

I snort, closing the door behind me. What hasn't Lucy done? Sometimes I think Ness and I were swapped as children because I have way more Lucy in me than my dad, and vice versa. It's an actual possibility too, we're only a year apart. Could've happened. Sometimes I pray it did.