Tormented Royal by Lily Wildhart

Chapter Sixteen

“HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!” I practically jump on Indi when I meet her at school. The last couple of weeks since my car crash have been pretty shit, but she’s the sunshine in my life, and it’s her birthday. I’ve been planning her gift for what feels like forever.

I grin at her when I release her from my hug, and she looks all sassy and beautiful. Her long hair is now a cascade of rainbow colors, and I fucking adore it. “Here. This is for you!”

Not bouncing up and down in excitement about her gift is fucking hard as she opens the envelope.

She gawks down at the tickets in her hands, blinking. I think I might’ve broken her.

It only takes a second or so before she comes back to life, and her squeal is so high-pitched, I think dogs on the other side of town can hear her. “Oh my God! You absolute fucking rockstar! Are these real?”

She waves the All Access Passes I got her for the Midnight Blue gig in San Diego in my face; and when I nod, she squeals again before jumping on me and hugging me so hard I almost fall over. I’m glad the bruising on my chest is gone, otherwise I’d be fucked right now.

“You’re coming with me right?” she asks.

“Yup!” I say with a nod, popping my p. “I have a hotel sorted out for us already, and it’s only a few hours drive away, so road trip! We just need to make it through to lunch because Smithy and your mom have already let the school know we won’t be around this afternoon.” I might need a 4.0 GPA but bringing her this joy is so worth missing class. Plus, I already spoke to East directly, and he’s not going to penalize us for missing one class. I’m caught up on everything else, having gotten straight As on all of my assignments so far. Except for the project I have with Lincoln. That class I’m worried about, especially considering Mr. Peters being a grade A pervert, but I’m hoping I can work on Lincoln to actually work with me since I’m pretty sure he doesn’t want a bad grade either. I can afford to skip a little, because Business is going to hang in the balance either way.

“I’m so fucking excited. Oh my God. I’m going to meet Jenna B. What if I fangirl too hard and make a total ass out of myself? Oh shit, that’s definitely going to happen. This is going to be so good and so terrible, and I don’t even care. I’m too excited.” The babble continues to fall from her lips, and I can’t help but laugh a little. It brings me so much joy seeing how happy she is.

“You’ll be fine, she’s excited to hang out too. I spoke to one of my friends earlier, since he’s on her team now. Jenna basically hired my dad’s entire road team and I love her for that, so we have All Access Passes for the entire thing.”

She stills and blinks at me for a second before whispering, “You spoke with Jenna B?”

I nod, and she covers her mouth with her hands. “Holy. Fucking. Shit.”

“Are you okay?” I ask, a little worried about her. I don’t care about everyone watching us, they can fuck right off. This is Indi’s day, and if she wants to be crazy and loud, then so be it.

She nods, looking back down at the tickets with wide eyes. “My bestie just got me the best present ever and told me she talks to my ultimate girl crush on the regular. I’m just having a moment.”

She grins up at me, and I burst out laughing. “I love you.”

“I love you too,” she says, linking her arm with mine, practically skipping as we head toward the main entrance of the school. “So where are we staying?”

I run through the details with her as we hit our lockers before heading to English.

The day passes quickly, with Raleigh finally back to being his usual laid-back, cheerful self during Music. He’s been understandably distant the last few weeks, but it’s nice having him back to how he was before the world’s most unfortunate date.

By the time the bell rings to signal lunch, I'm beyond excited to get out on the road with Indi for the gig tonight. Her squeal reaches me before she does as I head down the hall toward her. I grab my shit from my locker, and then we head straight out to the parking lot. “Head home, pack yourself a bag, and I’ll be there in less than an hour to get you.”

“Holy shit, I’m too excited, my heart is racing.” She grins and hugs me. “Okay, I’ll see you soon.”

I head over to my newly repaired Impala, checking to make sure every inch is safe before I jump in and drive home. I already packed my overnight bag, but I still need to get ready for tonight. I say a quick hello to Smithy as I climb the stairs to my room to shower and get my shit together.

Opening the door to my room, I freeze. The balcony door is open again and there’s a note lying on my bed. Fuck, that’s so creepy.

I pick the thick cream paper up, taking a deep breath before opening it.

I told you to leave. You didn’t listen. You’re going to regret that.

Fuck this, I’m not letting whoever this is ruin my weekend. I should probably be a little more concerned after the car crash and everything else that’s happened, especially when the note is on my bed; but today is Indi’s birthday, and I refuse to be rattled. I drop the note back onto the bed and head for my bathroom. I’ll let Smithy know about it before I leave and ask him to look into it, since we’re still waiting on his security guy.

I take extra care getting ready and pep talk myself into not breaking down on Indi’s birthday. Going back to the stadium I was at last with my dad has me all kinds of fucked up. Tonight isn’t about me, though, so I’m shoving all of my bullshit in a box to deal with another day.

Once I’m ready, I grab my bag and head down to find Smithy. He’s waiting for me in the kitchen. “Oh good, Miss Octavia, I’m glad I caught you. I got a call while you were upstairs. My sister is in the hospital. Since I know you’re away tonight, I was wondering if you would mind terribly if I flew home to be with my family?”

“Smithy, of course not! Go, family comes first, always!” Fuck the note, we can deal with that when his sister isn’t in the fucking hospital.

“Thank you, Miss Octavia. I’ve made a call to a friend at the security company, he’s going to come and check on the house a few times while we’re gone to ensure nothing untoward happens in our absence. He’ll also be upgrading the system to a new state of the art system, so I’ll ask him to leave instructions for you.”

“You don’t need to thank me, Smithy, she’s your family. Can I have your friend’s details? Just so I can let him know when I’m home. That way I won’t get freaked out by people I don’t know being in the house when I’m back.”

“Yes of course. I’ll send the contact over to you. I need to organize a flight, and then I’ll sort it out.”

“Take the jet,” I tell him, and his eyes go wide.

“I couldn’t.”

“You could. It’s just sitting there doing nothing, and it’s way better than flying commercially. It’s not like I need it.” I shrug because I’m not wrong. Why pay for a drop hat staff if you don’t use it?

“If you’re sure,” he says, looking uneasy, so I smile and nod.

“Beyond sure. I don’t need it, and you do. It’ll get you there faster too. Then you can come back whenever you’re ready without having to worry about flights.”

“Thank you, Miss Octavia. Enjoy your trip away. I’ll keep you up-to-date with the details of when I’m coming home as soon as I know exactly what’s going on.”

“There’s no rush, honestly. If you need to stay there, do it. I can ask the security guy to be here if I need to.” I’d rather not, but considering the note, it might be a good idea. Smithy almost looks uncomfortable at the thought but nods anyway.

He thanks me once more, so I hug him and tell him goodbye before heading out to the car to go grab Indi. Excitement bubbles in my chest at the thought of how much fun this weekend is going to be.

I slide my aviators into place and start the car.

San Diego, here we come.

* * *

“Please don’t pass out,” Indi murmurs to herself as we walk toward the doors of the stadium, and I can’t help but laugh softly under my breath. I take her hand and squeeze it, just to find that she’s shaking like crazy.

I nudge her shoulder with mine to grab her attention from where she’s staring at her feet. She looks all kinds of amazing in her knee-high rainbow Converse, little shorts, and band tee coupled with her rainbow hair. “You okay?”

“I’m good,” she says quietly. “Trying not to freak out. You’d think I’d be more chill than this. But I’ve never been to a concert before, and you did all of this for me. I’m a little overwhelmed.”

I pull her to a stop before moving us out of the crowd of people heading toward the stadium. “If this is too much, we can wait out here before going in. Or we don’t have to go in at all.”

She takes a deep breath and looks up to the sky. “There’s no way in hell we’re not going in. I tend to avoid big crowds because they make me anxious as fuck. I thought I’d be okay, but apparently my brain is working against me. I just need a minute, and I’ll be fine. Sorry.”

“Dude, you have nothing to apologize for. You do whatever you need to. I’m chill.” We move to sit on a bench, and I give her the space she needs to get herself together. My phone buzzes in my pocket, so I slip it out and take a quick look.

Panda: Are you here yet?

I can’t help but grin. I’ve missed his face so goddamn much. I’ve been away from tour life for too long.

Me: Yup! Just outside, shouldn’t be too long. I’ll find you as soon as we’re in.

Panda: I’ll hang around near the back doors, so just head this way, don’t worry about going through the front.

Me: You rock, P! See you soon

I drop a message to the security guy too, so he has my number should anything happen, before tucking my phone away and focusing on Indi. Her eyes are closed and she’s breathing deeply, as if she’s meditating, but her smile grows. That’s all I really give a fuck about anyway. An anxiety attack definitely wasn’t part of the plan today, but I’ve been there, so I totally get it.

She opens her eyes and bounces to her feet, practically vibrating positivity. “Let’s do this!”

I grin at her, glad to see her back to her usual self, and get to my feet. “Hell yes! Panda messaged me, and he’s waiting for us round the back. We can head to the crew entrance, so we don’t need to deal with the crowds and lines out front.”

“You freaking rock. Sorry for freaking out just then. Also, who the fuck is Panda?”

“You have nothing to be sorry about, and you don’t need to explain. If I said I’d never had a panic attack, I’d be flat out lying. And Panda is… well, Panda. He’s one of my dad’s old roadies. He isn’t much older than us, and he’s a fucking legend.” I shrug and link my arm with hers. “Now let’s go enjoy the rest of your birthday, shall we?”

“Lead the way, oh wise one!” she jokes, and I laugh. It doesn’t take long to get to the back, and I drop Panda a message when we’re close.

“V baby!” I look up and see the metal door opening, and I squeal. I run toward him and leap into his giant fucking arms. The guy’s a fucking tree, catching me easily before spinning me around. “I missed you!”

“I missed you too, P!” I squeeze him before he puts me down. Indi reaches us, and I smile at her sheepishly as she checks my friend out. “Sorry, P, this is my girl Indi. Indi, this is Panda.”

“That’s one hell of a name.” She gives him a wicked grin, and he groans.

“You wear eyeliner one time and end up with a name like Panda. I swear to fuck, it’s going to follow me for a lifetime. My name is Evan, it’s nice to meet you! You must be the birthday girl. Welcome to the Psycho Girl tour.” He shakes her hand, and her excitement goes up a few notches as she bounces on the balls of her feet. If I wasn’t convinced she’s head over heels for Jackson, I’d swear she was crushing. P has that charm about him that puts you instantly at ease. He also looks like a golden fucking Adonis, so I get it. I’d be lying if I said I hadn’t rocked a major crush on him before now.

“I mean, was it questionable eyeliner?” she asks, and he grins. I laugh, thinking about that night.

“He forgot he had it on, rubbed his eyes, and well… It was really hot in Atlanta. It smudged a lot, so he became Panda.” He grabs me by the waist and lifts me, tickling me while Indi laughs.

“What the fuck’s going on out here?” a shout comes from inside the stadium halls. Indi’s eyes go wide with fear, but I smile wider as P puts me down.

“Mac!” I basically attack him as he walks into view, and his anger disappears as soon as he sees me.

“V, is that really you?” He blinks down at me for a second before hugging me back, and P moves to stand by Indi, making her feel included. I love him for that. This is her birthday, and I’m sucking all the fun up.

“Hey, Mac,” I say quietly, squeezing him before I let go. “Indi, this is Mac. Mac, this is Indi, my bestie from back home.”

“It’s good to meet you, Indi. I didn’t realize you were coming tonight.” He almost looks sad to see me, but I know that’s because of the last time we were here together. I feel the pain in my very fucking soul, but I refuse to let all of my baggage ruin this day for Indi.

“P helped me keep it a secret so I could surprise you guys. It’s Indi’s birthday, and she’s a huge Midnight Blue fan,” I explain, and he nods.

He moves over to Indi and talks to her quietly for a minute before hugging her. “Thank you for looking after my girl.”

I swear I get all misty, and I look up to the sky to stop the tears that threaten to spill over. Tonight is not about me, and I'm not ruining this eyeliner.

“Now, that’s enough of this mushy shit. Let’s go find Jenna and the girls, shall we?” Mac coughs and bangs his fist against his chest, going hyper macho. I can’t help but giggle a little.

“Let’s do it,” I say, grabbing Indi’s shaking hand. “Tonight is going to be fucking awesome.”

“You’re in for a treat tonight too. They’re unveiling the new single live tonight,” P tells us as we enter the stadium and the chaos that is the backstage area before a show. Indi huddles closer to me. I’d almost forgotten how nuts it can get backstage, but at P’s words, her excitement overtakes her. She practically bounces next to me, eyes wide.

“Best. Birthday. Ever!”

* * *

We head to the green room to meet the girls before the gig, and Indi is so nervous. She keeps shaking out her hands before clenching her fists, over and over again. It’s like she’s literally fizzing.

I adore her so freaking much.

It’s the only reason I’m clinging to the happy she’s putting out. Because inside, I feel like I’m dying a little. Walking these halls is crushing. The last time I walked them, I found my dad. He just looked like he was asleep, and then I saw the pill bottles, the bottles of whiskey, and the tinge of blue on his lips. I’ll never forget that moment. Sometimes I see it when I close my eyes, and I hate that it’s my last memory of him.

I still don’t believe he was trying to kill himself. They ruled it as a suicide, but I think it was accidental.

Mac squeezes my shoulder as we close in on the green room, and I guess he’s remembering the same thing I am.

At least we’re not heading to the dressing room. I’m pretty sure that that would break me fully, and that’s the last thing I want tonight.

“You ready?” I ask Indi, forcing as much excitement and happiness into my voice as I can. Hopefully she can’t see the strain in my smile through her nerves.

“I am so ready.”

She’s like a kid at Christmas, and it’s adorable.

“Please don’t let me word vomit on them?” she asks, clutching my arm, and I giggle a little.

“I swear I will stop you if that should happen.”

She nods and hugs me, just outside the green room door. “This is why I love you the most.”

Panda grins at me, his hand on the door handle before opening it a little and popping his head through the space.

“Get out of the way, Panda! Where’s my girl?” Jenna’s low, husky voice reaches me seconds before her beautiful face appears around the door frame. “There she is!”

She rushes me and hugs me, jumping with excitement. It’s been a minute since I saw her last, but she’s one of the few people who was there for me throughout all of the stuff with Dad. Indi’s eyes go wide as she leans against the wall, and I pull out of the hug. “It’s so good to see your face.”

“Yours too, bitch, don’t hide from us for so long next time. Selena’s been like a nagging mom, totally on my ass about getting you out to see us.” I can’t help but laugh at her dramatics as she flicks her long pink hair over her shoulder. Truthfully, though, Selena, who’s the drummer of Midnight Blue, is totally the mom of the group.

“I’ll try not to get dragged, kicking and screaming, to a hellhole the next time I can’t be on tour.” I stick my tongue out at her, and she rolls her eyes like I’m the drama queen here. “J, I want to introduce to you my girl, Indi. She’s literally been my saving grace since I went back to the Cove. She’s something of a fan.”

“Hi,” Indi squeaks, waving awkwardly at her, and I half want to die on her behalf as red spills across her cheeks. Jenna’s a pro and takes it in her stride, though.

“Thank you for watching out for our girl. Come on, I’ll introduce you to the others.” She slings an arm over Indi’s shoulders like they’ve been friends forever and drags her inside the green room.

I move to follow them, but Mac stops me with a hand on the shoulder. I turn to face him, and he looks me over like the over protective papa bear he is. He watches me closely while I stand for inspection, cocking an eyebrow at him. “Are you going to be okay being here tonight?”

I nod at him, acting like there isn’t an open wound in my chest and I’m not bleeding out all over the floor. “Yes. Tonight isn’t about me. I’ll be fine.”

He gets my hint and nods wordlessly. I’m glad. I don’t want him to prod because it won’t take much to bring down the carefully constructed walls I put into place to deal with being here tonight. He lets me go into the green room, and Indi is grinning like a cat who got the cream as P snaps pictures of her with the girls. I lean against the doorframe, letting her have her moment with them before they spot me.

She looks so fucking happy, and I’m not going to take that from her. Then Jenna grabs her acoustic and starts playing a ballad version of one of their most popular songs. Indi drops onto the sofa with P, absolutely rapt. It’s kind of adorable.

Selena heads over to me and pulls me into her arms wordlessly. To look at her, you’d never think she was the mom of the group. She’s absolutely covered head to toe in ink, her eyeliner’s thick as fuck, and her blunt black bangs frames her face in a way that almost makes her look like an intimidating badass. But she’s one of the softest, cuddliest humans I’ve ever met in my life.

She lets me go, asking me with a look if I’m good, so I nod and sway with her as Jenna sings. Indi doesn’t take her eyes from Jenna as she plays. The song comes to close as a girl I don’t recognize enters the room, clipboard in hand. “Time to go, ladies!”

“Let’s do this!” Emmy, the bassist shouts, and a whoop goes up around the room. “You going to come hang with us later?”

I look at Indi, who looks fully starstruck, so I answer Emmy myself. “You bet your ass we are.”

“Yes, bitch!” Jenna high fives me as she passes me. “Enjoy the show, Indi!”

They leave us with P, and Mac follows them, ever on guard. “You ready to go watch?”

“I don’t think my legs are working,” Indi says, the awe in her voice evident.

“Want to watch from backstage?” P asks, and I love him a little more in that moment. Watching without the crush of the crowd is absolutely my favorite way to gig, but I look to Indi because this is up to her.

She nods, and she finally jumps to her feet. “Lead the way, maestro!”