Breaking Conviction by Greer Rivers
Chapter Thirteen
After Naomi and Nora spoke with Sophie, mostly letting Sophie talk, Sophie asked that only Naomi be present for the rape kit. Nora, of course, was treating the situation with way more understanding than Naomi could muster, but she left telling Naomi she’d be back soon after giving them some privacy.
Naomi was still upset about Sophie refusing to report her rapist. The idea that someone like that could go out in the world free of guilt and shame, and possibly do it to someone else, chafed Naomi’s sense of justice raw.
But Naomi couldn’t deny that she was just as guilty of letting someone go scot-free. Nora had warned her that she’d find more in common with the victim than she’d thought, but neither of them could’ve known how right Nora would be. Besides the fact that the victim was a friend of hers, Sophie’s objections hit too close to home.
Naomi stood by, feeling helpless as her old friend was subjected to the process. Sophie turned in her clothes to the sexual assault nurse examiner, had her fingernails scraped, vaginal swabs done, blood, urine samples, pictures and her statement taken. By the time the exam was completed, Naomi could tell Sophie was desperate to leave, so they walked out to the car together as soon as they could.
“I know the SANE nurse gave me scrubs to wear…” Sophie pulled at the nondescript blue fabric. “But I still feel naked. Like I’ve been stripped of my dignity twice after that kind of exam.”
Naomi closed her eyes briefly, blinking back tears. “I’m sorry, Sophie.”
Such an empty, worthless platitude. Naomi wanted to say so much more, but she knew it’d come out wrong.
As soon as they stopped in front of Sophie’s car, Sophie reached for Naomi’s hand. “I know you want me to go to the police... I just can’t. Not yet, Nay. Please understand.” Sophie squeezed her hand and Naomi almost squeezed back three times, just like she did with Thea. She settled for one hard squeeze and smiled the best fake smile she could muster under the circumstances.
“I get it, girl. I do. I’m sorry I came on so strong.”
“It’s okay.” Sophie snorted. “After the luck I’ve had with men, it felt kinda good to have someone fight for me instead of against me.”
The words took root inside Naomi’s mind, reminding her she’d thought the very same thing only a few weeks ago with Wes.
Unable to speak at first, Naomi only nodded before clearing her throat.
“You good to go home by yourself, or do you want me to stay with you longer?”
“Yeah, I think I need some time alone.” Sophie must’ve seen Naomi’s worry because she squeezed her hand again. “I’ll be fine, though. Promise.”
Naomi nodded, understanding that feeling too. “Okay, and you call me next time you’re tempted to go out with an asshole, got it?”
Sophie snorted and held up her phone before opening her car door. “I’ve got your number now. You best believe I’ll be hittin’ you up to rant about more than just bad dates. But don’t worry. Next time I go out with a guy, I’ll think ‘what would my friend, Nay, say?’ If your bossy ass nixes him, then so will I.”
“Girl, I know it’s been a while, but how many times I gotta tell ya?” Naomi rolled her eyes as she backed away from the car. “I ain’t bossy, I’m the boss.”
Naomi winked and turned to walk back into the hospital. Once inside, she started to text Nora to find out where she’d gone off to but ran straight into a hard wall… and a soothing cedar and citrus scent, like peeling an orange in a homey cabin.
She took a deep breath of the soft fabric, trying to place it, right before she realized exactly who gave her that sense of comfort. Her eyes snapped wide and she pushed the man away.
“Snake! What’re you doin’ here?”
Wes nearly tripped backward, his eyes blinking quickly, like he’d been just as caught up in the moment as she’d been. He shook his head before clearing his throat. “Sorry—”
“Don’t say that,” she interrupted without thinking and immediately felt her cheeks heat.
That word always irritated her, but for some reason, hearing it come from his lips when he’d truly never done anything wrong made her want to scream. How many times had she heard an apology and been expected to magically forgive every sin? She didn’t know how to react when there was actually nothing to forgive.
She grimaced, knowing she wouldn’t be able to explain her odd reaction. “I mean… just… you don’t have to say that. You’re, uh, a troublemaker, and all, but other than that there’s nothing to apologize for.”
He narrowed his eyes at her with what looked like curiosity, and she just knew he was studying her again. She should’ve hated how well he already seemed to know her. But she didn’t.
“Nora told me to come get you. I looked all over until a nurse said you’d walked the survivor outside to her car.”
“Why didn’t Nora come get me herself?”
He gestured the way ahead of them, waiting as she nodded and began to walk forward. His hand was featherlight on her back as he gently guided her. Flutters settled low in her belly at his protective touch, but when she remembered they were in public and anyone could see, reality hit her and she couldn’t help the way her spine stiffened.
Wes must’ve mistook her fear for stubbornness. He huffed and dropped his hand, leaving an instant chill where it’d been. “I’m taking you to Nora, alright? I was visiting a friend and she tagged me out.”
“Oh.” She followed his lead through the halls as she racked her brain to figure out how to make their interaction less awkward after she’d started it off on the wrong foot. “You have a friend here?”
Wes nodded, his eyes crinkling at the edges with what might’ve been frustration or concern, she couldn’t tell. “Yeah, remember my teammate that Nora mentioned? The one in the coma?”
Naomi sucked in a breath and paused in the hallway. “Oh god, I didn’t even realize.”
His hand gravitated to her elbow, continuing to steer her forward with a light touch. Other people might not even notice, but everything this man did blasted loudly on her radar. She allowed the contact this time, not wanting to miss his warmth again, keeping her response neutral so as not to scare him away.
Just as the thought crossed her mind, he dropped his hold. He hadn’t done it harshly, but losing his warmth was abrupt all the same.
“He’s been in a coma for a year. For a while it was like his body was taking care of itself after he’d been shot, but it’s been a hell of a long time. Too long. We’re all worried, but don’t tell Nora. Knowing the truth might crush her and I think she’s still hoping for the best.”
At the crack in his voice, Naomi reacted on instinct and grabbed his tattooed hand. The ink on his knuckles peeked through her fingers and his palm was warm against hers. It was surprising to find something designed to look so intimidating could feel so comforting.
Wes’s steps slowed, but he held on, squeezing a little tighter before continuing to navigate them through the hospital halls and up two floors. When they finally reached the room, Wes turned and stopped her from going inside with a raised hand. She opened her mouth to question him, but when he tapped on his ear, she closed it again and leaned in to listen to what was happening inside the room.
She strained to hear until Nora’s laughter tinkled into the hallway.
“No way, she definitely wore it best. I don’t care who you are, Khlo’s body is bangin’. It’s not her fault her sisters are fun-sized like me.”
There was no response, and when Nora kept speaking as if someone answered, Naomi tilted her head and watched Wes’s reaction to find sad eyes and a grim tightening of his lips.
“Okay, yes, maybe Kourt’s my fave, but that’s just because she does whatever the eff she wants.”
Wes leaned into Naomi, his chest just an inhale away from hers as he whispered. “She does this all the time.” His warm breath caressed her ear. That, plus the combination of them still holding hands, sent delicious shivers down her spine. “She’s here nearly every day. Talking to him… like one day he’ll talk back.”
Naomi waited, listening a little longer before answering. “Maybe one day he will.”
Wes pulled away and Naomi got lost in his piercing blue eyes, so full of sincerity and compassion.
“I hope you’re right.” He spoke at a more normal volume, as if meeting her gaze made him forget they were supposed to be quiet. She couldn’t help but lean closer, drawn into the need to comfort him—
“You guys can come in, ya know. Drake and I can feel the sexual tension from here.”
Nora’s observation splashed over her and Naomi jumped back at the icy cold shock of panic in her veins.
“There’s no tension! None,” she called out before realizing she was still holding Wes’s hand. The grip suddenly felt less innocent than it was, and she snatched her hand away before muttering to him. “Sorry, I don’t know what came over me.”
Ugh, don’t apologize to him, just don’t freakin’ throw yourself at him anymore, damn.
Naomi pushed her hair back from her forehead as she tried to gather her wits. Finally, she leveled Wes with a look she reserved for chastising Thea.
“We shouldn’t be all over each other in the hallway. It’s inappropriate.” At Wes’s snort, she scoffed. “What’s so funny?”
“Holding hands is far from being all over each other.” A dark look clouded his face. “But either way, I’m sure your fiancé wouldn’t have liked us as close as we were.”
Naomi flinched. She hardly even thought of Dean that way anymore, hadn’t worn the ring in months and even had to remind herself on multiple occasions of her relationship status when she drooled over Wes. Hearing him say it was damn painful.
“Come on,” he passed by her and citrus-cedar washed over her as he turned to enter the room, again not giving her a chance to reply.
“My frandssss!” Nora raised her arms in a cheer. “Drake, we’ve got guests. Isn’t that marvelous?”
Wes chuckled, likely at Nora’s nineteen-fifties television accent, but didn’t he see it, too? The pain written all over Nora’s face was obvious to Naomi, as the poor woman held up the mask of false happiness like a shield.
Her posture was slouched, although she leaned against the bed as if to play off her exhaustion. Bottle green eyes were dull behind sparkling rose gold glasses as she watched Wes and Naomi enter the room, and her smile wasn’t much more than an upward swipe on her face. No emotion, just a facade. Everyone always joked about how positive Nora was, but Naomi was starting to wonder if they saw her at all.
Like recognizes like.
Nora’s somber voice echoed in her head, completely at odds with the one that chirped in out loud. “Have a seat, you guys. Drake and I were just in an intense debate about the Kardashians.”
Drake, or Draco as she’d also heard the others call him, laid prostrate on the hospital bed, his eyes closed. The man was ginormous, and intimidating as hell, even in a coma. It was like the blond Viking was only resting before he was brought back to rain thunderbolts all over the world. Still, walking into the hospital room reminded her an awful lot of one of the sterile tombs, or Norse funerals she’d seen on the History Channel with Thea.
Naomi searched her mind for any suitable conversation segue before she remembered how disastrous her first experience with a victim had started out.
“Um… sorry about that downstairs. I wasn’t expectin’ the victim to be a friend of mine. Or for her to shoot down the chance to get back at the jerk who did that to her.”
Nora waved her hand. “It’s fine. You shoulda seen Ellie the first time a survivor” —she gave Naomi a pointed look— “said no to us. Our girl went ballistic and cried for days. Granted, that was before all her therapy to deal with her own shiz. She’s definitely gotten better, and you will, too. But it’s never easy.”
After an eternity of Naomi just nodding, she finally realized she should ask about the literal comatose guy in the room. She was going to have to majorly work on her damn people skills now that she was training to be a volunteer victim advocate for Sasha Saves.
“Thanks, so um… This is Drake? How’s he doin’?”
Nora had the grace not to point out Naomi’s awkwardness, just lifting a shoulder. She got up and moved magazines from the chair in front of the window and glanced back at Naomi before pointing to the seat, indicating she could sit there. Naomi glanced to Wes before grabbing it to do just that.
“It’s okay, I’m going to make a coffee run,” he explained. “Do you guys want anything?”
Naomi and Nora both shook their heads before Wes nodded and left the room.
Once Naomi had settled herself across from Nora on the other side of Draco’s bed, she waited for her new friend to speak.
“He’s doing the same.” Nora explained, finally answering Naomi’s question. “Doctors say he could come out of it today, or tomorrow, or...” Nora trailed off and swallowed hard as she sat back down.
Naomi’s heart ached for her new friend, for Wes and the rest of the BlackStone men, for the women Draco had been trying to save, for Draco himself. “I’m so sorry, Nora.”
She cringed inwardly. If I say that word one more time, I’m gonna lose it.
“Do you think he can feel it? When I do this?” Nora took Draco’s limp hand in her own small one and turned to Naomi, those big green eyes begging her to agree.
Tears pricked in Naomi’s. She’d had hoped the same thing when she was fourteen, sitting next to her father’s hospital bed. He’d never woken up to tell her.
“I-I don’t know,” she answered honestly. “But I’d like to think so. I don’t think it does anyone any good to think he can’t feel it, ya know?”
Nora nodded again and sighed. “Nurses do exercises with him, to try to limit any trouble he may have physically after waking up. I do them too, but I’m afraid that if he does open his eyes, exercises won’t be enough to bring him back to who he was.” She leaned on the hospital bed, still holding Draco’s hand. “I always thought it was a miracle he made it out alive. But if this is alive...” She waved her hand, indicating his entire body, before shaking her head. “Sometimes I think I see his eyes move behind his lids when I say something crazy or his hand will respond when I squeeze it. The nurse says it’s all in my head. Just hopeful thinkin’. I feel like I know everything about him, Naomi. But I don’t. I don’t know a godsdamned thing about this man except that he thought I was worth dying for. I just have this gut feeling that being trapped like this is his nightmare.”
Naomi watched as Nora’s thumb traced the top of his hand. “What makes you so sure?”
Nora snorted out a laugh. “Well, first of all, who in their right mind would want this? And second, I mean, look at him. He’s huge. I just imagine him enjoying life outside in a flimsy ass tent like a loon who doesn’t know electricity was invented over a century ago.”
A chuckle escaped from Naomi’s chest and she felt the first true smile, albeit small, that she’d had in weeks. Even when Nora was sad, she had a knack for making others happier. Naomi’s grin waned as she thought about how exhausting and lonely it had to be, to always put up a front for others’ benefit, never quite being able to feel what she needed to feel.
Unsure how to make the woman next to her feel comfortable enough to open up, Naomi moved on, hoping the answers would come to her at some point.
“What’re those?” Naomi asked, pointing to the pile of magazines Nora had placed on the bedside table.
Nora turned to see where Naomi was pointing and laughed. “Oh, those?” It looked like she squeezed Draco’s hand before she let it go to reach the magazine. “These are why I wonder if Drake’s ever gonna wa—” She cleared her throat. She blew out a harsh breath. “Anywho, I read him these every day. Gotta make sure he’s in the know whenever he comes back from his brain vacay.”
Naomi took the magazine being handed to her and flipped through it. “Cosmo, Nora? Really? Isn’t that a little risqué?”
A snort lifted Nora’s shoulders up. “Oh my dear, sweet child. The fact that you think Cosmo is risqué is effin’ adorable.”
It was Naomi’s turn to scoff. “Nora, I’m, what? Two years older than you?”
“Bah” —Nora dismissed her objection with a gesture— “everyone’s littler, sweeter, and younger than me in my world. It’s nicer that way. Otherwise it’s the opposite.”
“Okay, fair, but you seriously read women’s magazines to him?” she teased. “You think this big man’s gonna want to hear about ‘Who Wore It Best?’”
Nora huffed before rolling her eyes dramatically and snatching the magazine back. “We’ll have none of that negative energy in here, rude-y Trudy. ‘Kay? There’s valuable info to be learned. Like...” She flipped through the magazine. “Ah, yes. ‘How to Give a Guy the Blow Job to Die For.’ Or how ‘bout this?” She lifted the magazine toward Draco’s comatose body and spoke to him. “This’ll be handy for you someday, big guy, ‘How to Tell Him He Doesn’t Know Where Your G-Spot Is.”
She waited a beat before sighing, as if she really thought antagonizing him would wake him up. “Fine, be that way, ya jerk. Keep your thoughts to yourself.” She turned back to Naomi. “There’re also trusty horoscopes, ‘Who Wore It Best,’ hot celeb goss, and the shmexy story in the back. That part’s my fave.” She flipped the pages all the way to the end before clearing her throat.
“Joanne winked.” Nora’s voice was low and husky, and Naomi hid her silent chuckles behind her hand. The woman was a riot. “‘Wanna take this to the bedroom, Scott?’... Let’s see... there’s some makin’ out, a little foreplay and—oh yes—get ready to cringe. ‘Joanne reached into the bedside table to get a condom.’”
Nora barked out a laugh and tossed the magazine onto Draco’s still legs. “Those safety-first stories kill me every time. Like, safe sex is the sexiest sex, sure, blah, blah, blah, but it’s a godsdamned three page short story for cryin’ out loud. Like, hellooo can’t we just assume that part with an asterisk at the beginning or something? I mean, what could be less sexy than the word condom?” She spat the word from her mouth. “Why can’t it be something like ‘shaft sheath’ or ‘cock cloak’ or ‘groin glove?’” She waved her hand with a flourish and a roll of her eyes like when Thea said ‘duh’. “Obvi it would need to be an alliteration.”
Naomi laughed outright even as she felt her face grow hot. She definitely wasn’t used to Nora’s brand of candor, but it was refreshing as all get out to be around someone who said what everyone was thinking.
“Anyway, that’s on me and the big guy. What about you and your fella?”
“Uh, my… oh, my fi-um… Dean’s fine. He’s been workin’ an alternating schedule and is on second shift today—”
“Cool, cool, cool. But what about you and Superman, huh?” She waggled her eyebrows. “I want the tea on Mr. Tall, Pale, and Handsome. He’s been lookin’ at you like you’re birthday cake and he’s on a diet. Spill, girl.” Nora crossed her holey, straight-legged jeans and propped her elbow on her knee. She left her chin on her closed fist and smiled, blinking her eyes in expectation.
Naomi’s already heated cheeks felt like they finally caught fire before she carefully schooled her face.
Fuck, am I that obvious?
She didn’t want to snap at her friend, but she needed to nip this shit in the bud real quick. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, Nora. And I’d appreciate it if you didn’t bring this up again, alright?”
Nora’s eyebrows raised before smiling knowingly and relaxing from what was apparently her ‘spill the tea’ pose. “Alright then, Gandolf. Keep your secrets.”
Naomi felt her brows furrow again before she huffed out a laugh when she finally sort of understood what Nora was referencing. “Girl, I swear, a conversation with you is like talkin’ directly to Twitter.”
“Excuse me, Nora?”
Naomi turned to find a tall man in scrubs with dark skin and black hair. His deep brown eyes seemed to only see Nora as he walked into the room with concern etched into his handsome features.
“Oh, hey, Matt.” Nora’s voice came out hoarse and Naomi swiveled back to see her pale face had somehow blanched further. “Uh, Naomi, this is Matt.” As if he was registering Naomi for the first time, Matt lifted his hand in a halfhearted greeting with a small smile. “He’s one of the nurses on Drake’s rotation, so we’ve started to, uh... get to know each other. Um... what’s up?”
Matt shifted on his feet before speaking to Naomi and then Nora. “It’s really nice to meet you, Naomi, but I really need to speak with Nora... alone, if that’s alright?”
“Oh, sure—”
“—No, stay!” Nora reached over Draco’s body and grabbed on to her arm.
Matt shifted on his feet again, obviously uncomfortable. “Nora, I really wanted to speak to you alone... It’s about Mr. Heklason.”
“Whatever you have to say about him, you can say in front of Naomi.”
Matt nodded, seeming to accept that was as good as he was going to get. “Okay... I would have preferred to do this in private, but...” He walked over to Nora and crouched down so he was eye level with her and took her hand. Naomi noticed her slight flinch, but it didn’t seem like Matt did. “A doctor is waitin’ to talk to Hawk since we don’t have any family members on file, and I could get in trouble for tellin’ you but I—” He looked at Draco and a look Naomi couldn’t decipher crossed his face. “I know you care about him, so I wanted to talk to you first and take the sting out of what the doctor’s gonna say.”
“Just say it, Matt,” Nora snapped and Naomi blinked at her tone.
“The doctor said that he’s seriously considering discussing options... for Mr. Heklason’s future.”
“Really? I just spoke to a doctor recently and he didn’t talk about that.” Nora eyed him warily, and Naomi had to wonder where Nora’s extreme mood change had come from.
“I know. But the likelihood of him wakin’ up, Nora—”
She tugged her hand free. “I told you, he’s responding to me when I talk to him. His eyes move and his hand squeezes back, and—”
“No, Nora.” Matt shook his head and what looked like genuine sympathy washed over his face. “Babe, those are just reflexes. They don’t think he’s gonna come back. Not after this long.”
After a moment of silence, Naomi noticed Nora’s green eyes brimmed with tears as they bore into Draco’s blanket. She closed them and seemed to literally swallow back her emotion, before opening them again with the moisture suddenly gone. “Thanks, Matt.” Her voice was flat and distant. “I think you should go.”
Matt’s head dipped before he nodded. “I get it. Just... call me when you wanna talk. I’ll always be here for you.”
Nora’s eyes never left the blanket in front of her. “Thanks.”
Matt seemed to want to say more, but finally nodded once before leaving.
Naomi and Nora sat in silence together. Once again, Naomi didn’t have a damn clue as to what she should say to console her. Of course, Nora took care of the awkwardness after clearing her throat.
“Naomi, I’m sorry, but do you mind giving me some privacy? I’d like to be by myself with Drake.”
“Oh, of course, yeah sure.” Naomi shot up to leave, saying her brief goodbye while trying not to stress over how she was supposed to get back to Sasha Saves.
I knew I should’ve ridden by myself.
She’d wanted to, but Nora had assured her that they would leave in time. As Naomi walked out of the hospital room, she looked back once to see Nora’s forehead resting against Draco’s leg.
For a moment, Naomi thought she saw it too, that quick movement behind his eyes, maybe a twitch of his hand. But Matt had said that the doctors were basically giving up hope. As usual, she was just seeing what she wished she could.
Was that really how she wanted to keep seeing the world? She was coming to realize that was definitely how she saw her relationship with Dean. Always wishing it would get better. Struggling to mesh her deep-seated need for Thea to have her father in her life with their reality. Hoping they’d last and provide a loving home for Thea on a wing and a prayer.
Naomi leaned against the wall outside of the hospital room and resisted looking at the time on her phone. Instead, she covered her face in her hands, once again trying to figure out what she should do with her own damn life. Why had it been so easy to figure out solutions with Sophie, but impossible to figure out her own?
What would my friend say?
Sophie’s new mantra rang in her ears. Was it really that simple? Talk to herself like she would her friend?
She heard his steps and felt his presence before he leaned against the wall beside her, nudging her arm gently with his elbow.
“Hey... what’re you doing out here?”
Naomi moved her hands from her face and brought herself to look at Wes. His concern was obvious and she couldn’t keep looking at his expression or it would send those stupid butterflies fluttering in her belly again.
But as she moved her gaze down, she couldn’t take her eyes off his intricate tattoos up his neck and down to those strong hands. Instead of fluttering, desire pooled in her lower belly as she thought about what those calluses there would feel like on the softest parts of her.
And there was another question she’d been craving the answer to. What would this man do with the vulnerable pieces of her soul? The ones she’d never felt comfortable giving away to anyone?
She closed her eyes against the hope that she’d finally found someone who would safeguard her heart. Dreams like that would only get her in trouble. Choosing Thea’s father meant there was no use wishing to be rescued from a tower of her own making. Besides, this wasn’t one of Thea’s stories.
She’d learned the hard way that white knights only exist in fairy tales.
