Knocked Up By the Jerk by Loni Ree

Livie

The manwho owns my heart is sorry he fucked me. Seeing the guilt and revulsion in his eyes sends pain slicing through my soul. My battered heart cracks in half, and I rush away before he can see the tears running down my cheeks.

My sister follows me, and I lead her into the empty dining room. “I’m so sorry,” I hiccup. “I’ve got to get out of here and pull myself together before I have to deal with him.”

I can’t believe I acted like a slut at her wedding. I see the pity in her eyes, and I want to kick myself for this mess. “Take my car back to the hotel.” She steps into the kitchen and grabs her extra set of keys from the rack hanging next to the door. “I’ll tell Mom and Dad you aren’t feeling well.”

I see the worry in her eyes, and I realize she has sensed my broken heart. There’s no way I’ll let this screw-up affect her special day. I paste a fake smile on my face and tell her. “Thank you.” I hug her while guilt eats at me. “Would you give my regrets to everyone?” She sighs and nods. “I’m sorry to cut out early, but I can’t handle any more excitement.” I’ve had enough to last me a lifetime.

My sister doesn’t look upset. “We’re about to head to the hotel anyway,” she assures me. They have a crack of dawn flight and decided to spend tonight at a hotel close to the airport. Thank goodness this day is ending.

“I love you.” I smile. “I’ll be back first thing in the morning to check on Cinnamon.” Shit. Why did I promise to stay here for the next week and babysit her dog while they’re honeymooning? Can’t the universe give me a break? How am I going to avoid the jerk police chief in this small town? At least my parents are flying home tomorrow morning, so I don’t have to hide my heartache from them for the entire week.

I walk into the front hall and run into my parents. Taking a deep breath, I pull my convenient lie from my bag of dishonestly. Out of the corner of my eye, I notice the jerk standing in the living room doorway. “Since I’m using Bridgett’s car this week, I’m going to drive it back to the hotel tonight,” I explain to my parents, ignoring him. That wasn’t the original plan, but I’m improvising. As I drive away from the house, I feel like I’m leaving a part of me behind.

I’m too keyed up to sit still. Looking around the empty suite, I decide I need something to take my mind off my huge screw-up. I undress and turn the shower to hot. As it heats, I stare down at the torn thong in my hand, and memories roar through my mind. From the first moment we met, the jerk has made it very clear that he can’t stand me. I’m not sure what I did to earn his dislike, but it’s killing me. My dumb heart belongs to him whether he wants me or not. Seeing his regret and hearing his apology crushed all my dreams. Instead of finding a way to earn his love, I’m trying to figure out how to avoid him for the rest of my life.

After my long shower, I pull my wild hair up into a messy bun and look for my swimsuit. A few laps in the gorgeous hotel pool might help clear my thoughts. I leave a note for my parents so they don’t worry and head out to the pool.

They’re sitting on the sofa when I return a while later. “Honey, are you okay?” My mother comes over to wrap her arms around me, and I sag against her.

There’s no way I’m going to explain this crazy situation to them on my sister’s wedding day; therefore, I lie. “I think all the excitement and rich food were too much for me.” I step back and shrug. “I just needed to cool off and relax a little.” My mother looks over at my dad, and a silent message passes between them. I know they don’t believe me, but they let the subject drop. When my mother offers to stay with me and help take care of Cinnamon, I assure her I’m fine. This next week will be hard enough. This town is too small, and I’m sure I’ll run into the police chief. I only hope my heart survives the ordeal.

* * *

We checkout of the hotel after breakfast, and my parents head to the airport. I stop by the grocery store to grab a bag of chocolate chip cookies to help soothe me. Cinnamon is waiting by the door when I walk in, and the spoiled dog glares at me before looking away. Luckily, I remembered to pick up her favorite treat while I shopped.

After unpacking, I grab the cookies and dog treats and head for the living room. I turn on a movie and wait for my charge to come to me. She glances at the box of snacks sitting on the table and trots over to curl up on the sofa next to me. We spend the rest of the afternoon watching television and eating our treats.

I manage to forget about my screw-up until dinner time. After the sun goes down, the house feels extra lonely, and I’m still drained from yesterday. I decide to soak in the bathtub before going to bed early. Sleeping is impossible. I’m exhausted but wide awake. I end up spending a long, agonizing night thinking about Mason and everything that happened at the wedding. My heart squeezes in my chest as I remember the way he touched me and brought my body to life. Making love to him was a dream come true until he woke up and realized he’d given into his unwanted feelings. I’m not sure what is causing him to fight this pull between us, but I plan to avoid the hell out of him in the future. I pray that, with time and distance, my heart will recover from these burdensome emotions.

Over the next few days, Mason comes by the house several times, but I don’t answer the door. My heart is getting more resilient each second. At least, that’s what I keep telling myself. His attempts to see me stop on Thursday, and my heart breaks all over again. I know this is what I wanted, but it still hurts badly.

Fletcher and Bridgett come home on Friday night, and I can’t take being this close to Mason any longer. I make up a lie about an emergency at the office and change my flight to early Sunday morning.

Even as I assure myself I’ll be back to normal soon, my heart calls me a liar.