Heartless Lover by Faith Summers

30

Eric

Ijump in my car, and I drive like a fucking mad man. When I get to my apartment, I curse myself for living in the fucking penthouse.

I rush inside and head to the terrace to find Lyssa standing by the glass doors with tears pouring out of her eyes and I think the worse has happened.

For the first time in my life, I feel afraid. I’m afraid to ask her what happened because I don’t want her to tell me I’m too late.

“She’s on the ledge, Eric,” Lyssa says quickly. “She won’t come down. I can’t get her to come down and come back inside. I’m so sorry. I tried everything.”

“It’s okay. Go inside and wait for me.” I summon strength from the last traces of my heart and take one brave step outside onto the paved surface.

When I look down the length of the balcony and see Summer standing on the ledge my heart tumbles in my chest.

She’s standing there with her long brown hair billowing in the wind and her bright brown eyes brimming with sorrow and pain.

I should never have left her. I should have told Borya to get the fucking computer and bring it here.

I just thought she’d be okay for a few hours. But a few hours did this.

I look at the woman before me who stumbled into my life and as she turns her head and looks back at me, I see what was afraid to see.

I’ve never just felt desire when I look at her. There was always something more. Something that fascinated me because I liked watching her and she was the one thing I’ve happened upon since I’ve been back in the world of the living that I imagined myself looking at forever.

To see forever it meant seeing some kind of future that didn’t involve death.

My death. My penance. My purgatory for my mistakes.

What I see now as I look at her is the path to my redemption, and maybe hers too. All I know right now as I gaze at her is if she jumps, everything I ever wanted goes with her.

I take another careful step and move closer to her, hoping she doesn’t jump before I get to her.

I stop when I’m inches away and keep my gaze trained on her.

“Baby, please come to me,” I say, and she shakes her head.

“No. This is it. This is the answer. You don’t need me to find Robert. You can find him.”

“That’s not why I want you to come to me.”

“It’s the end of the road for me Eric. Too much has happened, and I can’t take anymore. You see this?” She shows me her wrist with the little Carpe Diem tattoo.

“I see it.”

“I never needed to be reminded to live. Scarlett thought it was a good idea. We got it when we were eighteen, but you see by then all sorts of things had happened to me. She tried though. She tried to fix it. Tried to fix me. But some broken things can’t be fixed. I’m one of them.”

“I don’t believe that.”

She smiles at me. “You’re sweet, did you know that?”

“Summer, please come to me. Baby, we can talk all you want, just not here.”

She shakes her head again. “I can’t go with you.” A tear runs down her cheek and she wipes it away. “It was drugs.”

“What was drugs?”

“That’s what sent me to Club Montage. I was an addict in recovery and months before I worked there, I relapsed when I saw my stepfather in People Magazine. I got in trouble with my dealers when I couldn’t pay them for the drugs I took, and they threatened to kill me. That’s how I ended up at the club.” She stops talking for a moment then continues. “My stepfather is the governor of New York now as you probably know. He’s a man most revere for his work with children and young adults, most notably his work with the young women’s charities. There’s a reason he loves working with young women so much. They called my monster Man of the Year. If they ever knew what he was really like I don’t think they would call him that.”

“What did he do to you Summer?”

“Hurt me. He abused me for years. He started when I was thirteen. He got me pregnant when I was sixteen. When my mother found out, she acted like she didn’t believe it was him, but she knew what was going on all those years and knew the baby was his. She just wouldn’t accept it. When Ted was confronted, he lied and said I got him drunk and seduced him. So, Mom blamed me instead. She couldn’t bare the fact I was having his child and that’s why she killed herself.”

Tears roll down her cheeks and my heart breaks for her.

“It wasn’t your fault, Summer.”

“No one believed me Eric. And my mother knew I was telling the truth and refused to believe me. She blamed me in her note. She wrote that I was the whore who seduced her husband and got pregnant. My father blamed me too because he never stopped loving my mother. It was he who found her dead, so he was the first to read the note and he believed her. That’s why he shunned me. And even though I had Scarlett, as I stand here, I’m not sure if she truly believed me either. Ted was such a manipulative bastard.”

I do my best to tamp down my rage. Now’s not the time to focus on what I feel.

“What happened to the baby Summer?”

She brings her hand to her cheek and dabs away another tear.

“After my mother died, Ted wanted me to get rid of the baby, but I wouldn’t do it. He was so worried the secret would get out. He knew if that baby was born, I’d have evidence to expose him for what he did to me, and his career would be over. I was a minor and his stepdaughter. Even if he claimed I got him drunk it wouldn’t have gone down well. I couldn’t get rid of the baby, and it wasn’t because I wanted to blackmail him. I just couldn’t do it.” She drags in a breath and as the wind picks up and lifts the ends of her hair, she looks so weak I fear it might blow her away.

“I tried to disappear,” she continues. “And he sent people after me to kill me. While I was trying to escape, I fell down a flight of stairs. I managed to get myself to a hospital, but it was too late. I lost the baby. He only left me alone because of that. That’s how I was able to get to Monaco and get off grid. I started taking drugs to forget. I stopped. My friend helped me, but that one relapse set off a chain reaction that led me to Robert.”

Jesus Christ.

I knew her past was bad, but I never knew it was it was as horrible as that.

“Summer, you don’t have to worry about any of those people anymore. We’re here now. You and me. I’ll take care of you.”

“No. No one ever cared about me, so you shouldn’t. Everyone forgot me, so you should. They let my dreams die and I died along with them a long time ago. I’ve been fighting so hard to survive, but I don’t know why. Why did I do that when so many wanted me dead? My mother hated me, my father hates me, my sister pitied me. You shouldn’t worry yourself over me. Nobody else did, and I helped kill the only person who gave a fuck.” More tears stream down her cheek. “I’m not going to allow anybody to kill me. If I’m dying, it’s on my own terms. Goodbye Eric. Thank you for trying. It meant a lot.”

The next second feels like it’s passing in slow motion as I watch my beautiful girl take a step right off the ledge.

I don’t know how I move so damn fast or how I push aside my own worry for my safety.

As she falls forward and I move with every ounce of strength inside me I know I can’t let her die.

I manage to catch her by her ankle and she screams, but I ignore the scream and work on pulling her up.

I’m nearly over the edge myself but I stand strong and pull her until she’s up and in my arms.

I fall back and move with her away from the balcony, hugging her hard so she doesn’t try to fight me.

“God dammit Summer,” I gasp and turn her so she can look at me. She’s crying hard, but I want her to look at me so she can see how serious I am. “I care. I care about you. If that’s enough for you, stay with me in this world. Don’t you dare go to the other side where I can’t find you and I can’t bring you back.”

Her tears calm and her eyes rivet to mine.

“Don’t die, don’t do it,” I add. “Because I care, and I won’t let anybody hurt you ever again. You hear me?”

She nods and when something like light flickers in the depths of her eyes I realize I have her back.

I cup the back of her head and bring her back to me. As her head touches my chest, I vow vengeance for everyone who hurt her. I will slay all her monsters.

I might not be able to find Robert, but I know exactly where to find Ted.