A Most Unlikely Betrothal by Alice Kirks
Chapter 19
Sophia stood back, regarding her work. The background needed a little more green and a bit of shading to make it look realistic. Would Richard guess what it was just by looking at it?
The painting featured the pond, the ducks, a fish leaping out of the water, and the surrounding greenery and blooms. It was a scene from the viewpoint of the gazebo, one that was imprinted on her mind forever. Sophia would never forget that wonderful afternoon and often caught herself thinking about it.
“A little more white on the fish, I think,” she decided. “Itblends in with the pond too much.”
Sophia hadn't seen any fish that day, but she could guess what sort they were. The ducks were well-represented in various stages of sitting and taking to the sky, and if one looked closely enough, they would notice little creatures hiding behind bushes, peeking their heads out of trees, and insects crawling across leaves.
However, the most important part of the painting were the two hands that lay inches apart on a table. One was noticeably female, and the other male. The hands were not touching, but Sophia had managed to convey the emotion showing how the couple were holding themselves back. This wasn't a painting she could readily show her parents, especially when the woman's hand was bare.
Sophia peered a bit closer, pleased at the dwindling restraint she had managed to paint into the pale limbs. The tips of the couple's shoes were showing as well, confirming tothe onlooker that there was indeed a man and woman. Sophia had still to give it a fitting name, but perhaps she should wait until she had completed the painting. It was nearly done, but the last finishing touches would take it from lovely to awe-inspiring.
“This could be my wedding gift to him,” she considered aloud. “But I might be too embarrassed to give it to him.”
Sophia didn't want Richard to assume that she was in love with him or anything, although she couldn't deny that she had some feelings for him. He was the reason why she couldn't get this ridiculous smile off her face. While she may not love him just yet, Sophia certainly cared about Richard and no longer had any misgivings about marrying him. If he could so easily talk about the future, why not embrace married life and be happy?
“Sophia?”
Pausing her next brushstroke, Sophia put down her palette and paintbrush and opened the door to find her mother walking down the hallway.
“Mama! I'm here,” she called.
The woman turned around, her dress curling about her legs as she moved towards Sophia.
“There you are, dear,” she said. “I've been looking for you all over the house but didn't think to look in here. Have you been painting all morning? You certainly look it.”
Sophia's mother wet a finger and swiped it across her cheek, pulling back to reveal a yellow paint smudge.
“I must have wiped my face with a dirty hand,” Sophia surmised. “Did you need me for something?”
“Your last dress fitting, dear. Did you forget?”
"Yes, Mama," Sophia admitted. "I was caught up in painting."
"I see that. Go wash up and meet me in the downstairs parlour in five minutes. The wedding is in less than five days, and there is still so much to do!"
Her mother left after Sophia promised that she would not dally any longer. The entire household had not stopped bustling about since yesterday when everyone seemed to realise that the wedding was just a few days away.
Sophia's mother kept changing the menu for the wedding breakfast, the servants were cleaning everything from top to bottom, and her father had not stopped shelling out money. It was far too chaotic for Sophia, so she had taken to slipping away at the first opportunity and usually ended up reading or painting.
After a quick wash of her face and hands, Sophia hurried downstairs only to nearly run smack into her sister.
“Oh! I'm so sorry, Lizzy. I didn't see you there.”
“No one sees me anymore,” the young woman complained. “And it's all your fault.”
Sophia didn't have any time for this today. Elizabeth was always throwing accusations at her and blaming Sophia for everything that was wrong with her life. That was hardly fair considering Sophia had always been the one to ensure her sister's happiness, but the younger woman had been largely forgotten since the household had begun preparing for the wedding.
Nothing I can say will make it any better. She has determined in her heart to hate me no matter what.
“I'm sorry, Lizzy, but I have to go.”
Sophia brushed past her sister, smiling apologetically. As expected, Elizabeth maintained her seething stare.
“Go off and wear the dress that should have been mine; marry the man that should have been mine; and live the life that should have been mine. In fact, you should take my very life to add to yours. Perhaps you'll live forever so you can take further advantage of what rightfully belongs to me.”
Sophia said nothing but hurried away, keeping her head down. Her sister's comments stung, but lately, they had lost much of their bite. Perhaps it had to do with knowing that Richard did not hate her as many others did, and she might just have a husband who wished to be with her.
Sophia entered the parlour with a smile to greet the seamstress, who commented on how radiant she looked.
"It must be love," the woman gushed. "I recall when I married my sweet Ernest. I do not think I stopped smiling for weeks after our wedding, and even now, he makes me laugh."
“Sophia has made a good match,” Sophia's mother commented. “Any woman in her place would be delighted. Now, let's make sure this dress fits perfectly. I do not want a seam out of place.”
Sophia went behind the screen and stripped down to her sheer underthings, no longer embarrassed that one could see so much of her. She had been through so many dress fittings that it didn't bother her as it used to.
It took nearly half an hour before her mother was satisfied with the dress, and the seamstress could go with the promise of having the final dress back in two days.
“Mama, do you think I could invite Rose for tea tomorrow?” Sophia asked, adjusting her dress as she came around the screen. “I have not seen her in some time.”
“As long as your tea does not interfere with our arrangements, I do not see why not.”
Sophia thanked her and sat at the writing desk to pen a short note to her best friend. She had so much to tell the woman that writing a letter just wouldn't do—Sophia needed several hours to explainall that had happenedandhow she was feeling.
Her mother left the room spouting about a headache and the need to lie down. Sophia promised to take a cold compress for her brow as soon as she had sent a footman with her note, so when she heard footsteps coming back into the room, she assumed her mother had decided not to go to bed after all.
“Mama,” Sophia began, turning to the doorway. It was Elizabeth instead. “Oh! I thought you were Mama.”
Her sister said nothing. She took a seat, placed a cushion upon her lap, leaned into it, and stared at Sophia.
“Lizzy, is something the matter?”.
“No. Everything is just perfect.For you, that is—I'm as miserable as can be.”
“I'm sorry to hear that.”
“You do not look it,” her sister argued. “Your head has been stuck in the clouds since we came back from tea with Richard and his mother. Why? Why are you suddenly so happy? You were moping about the house not so long ago.”
Elizabeth was right, for Sophia had been rather dreary for some time, but all of that had changed. Should she reveal to her sister how she felt? Perhaps a little bit.
“Things have changed between Richard and me, Lizzy. I used to see him as a spoilt and shallow man, but now he has shown me a different side to him. He is kind, thoughtful, and willing to go through this marriage to save my reputation. That has given me a little hope for the future.”
Elizabeth's jaw visibly clenched and unclenched as her eyes glowered with restrained anger. Sophia pushed further into her chair, not entirely certain of what her sister would do. The younger woman had had a scattering of rages before, and Sophia had always been the one to calm her down. What would happen now that she was the cause behind Elizabeth's latest rampage?
"Richard has always been so kind and sweet, Saffi," the woman said, her voice lighter than Sophia expected. "He is a lovely man, which is why I fell in love with him."
Sophia kept her silence. What could she say? What her sister said was true enough, but she could have argued that Richard had not necessarily been so kind and thoughtful towards her before.
“Do you think Richard feels the same way about you?” Elizabeth asked.
“What do you mean?”
"Does he think you're wonderful and worthy of his time? He may be willing to marry you, but it doesn't mean that he'll be happy with you. You tricked him, after all, and he is honourable enough to help you keep your reputation. My Richard is a selfless man and will always do the right thing even if it pains him."
Sophia gnawed on her lower lip, crushing the note in her hands. Elizabeth knew precisely how to cut a person down and seemed to relish doing it. Was this the sister she had watched grow up for nineteen years? The woman she had loved and cherished more than anything else?
Where did I go wrong with her? I don't even know what to say!
She didn't have to say a word, however, because Elizabeth charged forth with whatever was on her chest.
“Do you know how miserable I will be once you marry the man I love?” she asked. “But I am not the one you should be worrying about. You will be a hundred times more miserable than me, a wretched soul for the rest of your life. Do you know why?”
“Why?” Sophia asked, her voice small.
“Because you will marry a man who will never love you. Richard loves me, and he will always love me! You will forever have to look into his eyes and see the lack of love in them. Will you be happy? Will you?”
“I do not know,” Sophia replied truthfully. “Why must you trouble me so, Lizzy? None of this is my doing.”
“Liar!” the woman hissed, spittle flying out of her mouth. “Admit that you planned this entire situation.”
“How can I when I didn't? Oh, why won't you believe me?” Sophia cried. “You know me well, Lizzy, or I thought you did. I have always wanted what was best for you, and I would never do anything to hurt you.”
Elizabeth snorted and stood up. “The best for me was Richard, but you are the one who will marry him in just a few days. Why? How could you do this to me?”
The young woman began to pace the room, her hands balled fists at her sides. Elizabeth was so troubled that Sophia wanted to go to her and hug her, but she didn't dare.
“Please, calm down, Lizzy.”
“No! How can I be calm when I have to watch you marry Richard? You should have told our parents that you refuse to marry him and allowed your reputation to be ruined.”
Did her sister mean that? Would her own sister wish to see her ruin? It hurt to think so.
“Richard will not let me end our engagement,” Sophia said truthfully. “I have already spoken to him and he is determined to get married.”
“That is a lie! Richard would take any way out of this engagement to be with me. Simply go to our parents and tell them that you have changed your mind.”
Sophia shook her head. “It's too late.”
“It's never too late! Call the wedding off right now,” Elizabeth demanded, striding overto Sophia and grabbing her by the shoulders. “Tell our parents, Sophia, please! Call off the wedding for my sake.”
Elizabeth's eyes were crazed, but the tears in them were Sophia's undoing. “Oh, Lizzy…I can't disappoint our parents. What about their reputation?”
The woman dropped her hands in disgust. “I knew you wouldn't sacrifice anything for me, and yet you claim to love me. You're nothing but a liar, Sophia Emley, and I regret that you're my sister.”
And with that, Elizabeth left the room, slamming the door behind her. Sophia slumped forward, covering her eyes with her hands. That had been horrific and had cut to her very soul. Elizabeth had been like a madwoman, showing her mental instability. Had this mess affected her so terribly? Sophia could never have imagined that her beautiful sister could be reduced to the creature who had all but growled in her face.
“She didn't mean it,” Sophia whispered. “She didn't.”
She couldn't just sit by and do nothing while her sister spiralled out of control. What if Elizabeth did something to hurt herself? What then? Sophia would never forgive herself if that happened. Wouldn't it be better to have a ruined reputation and ensure her sister's deserved happiness than to live miserably with a man who would always carry a light in his heart for Elizabeth? The only person standing in the way of her sister and Richard's happiness was Sophia.
What would her parents say if she called off the wedding? They would be understandably angry and embarrassed for a little while, but once Richard and Elizabeth announced their intention to marry, they would put Sophia's scandal behind them. Perhaps they might even send her to a spinster aunt to live out the rest of her days in obscurity.
“I am used to that already,” she said with a choking laugh.
She had been a nobody and nothing before her betrothal to Richard, and she could easily go back to being that person again.
Sophia turned back to the writing desk, frowning when she kicked something on the floor. She bent down, her heart sinking. It was the note she had planned to send to Rose, but there was no use in doing that now. Sophia threw it into the little bin sitting beside the desk and began her next letter before losing her nerve.
Dear Richard,
You are a kind man to have sacrificed your freedom to save my reputation, but I assure you it is no longer necessary. I am thankful that you were willing to go through with this wedding and even sought to convince me that it is the right thing to do. However, we both know that is not true.
You belong with Elizabeth, and I give you my full blessing to seek her hand in marriage once I have announced my decision to my parents tomorrow evening. I will tell them that I refuse to marry you, which should free you from all consequences. Please do not attempt to sway my decision.
We both know this engagement should have never happened, but life has an amusing way of bringing people into each other's lives. Perhaps this was but a lesson we both needed for our future selves—who can know?
I wish you all the happiness in your future.
Yours Sincerely,
Sophia Emley
Sophia had to lean away from the paper by the time she got to her name because her tears were falling thick and fast. She didn't want to call off the wedding; she wanted to get married to Richard and have the sort of life he had inadvertently shown her.
Did I dream that afternoon in his secret garden? Did I misunderstand what he was telling me?
Sophia didn't think so, but Elizabeth's happiness needed to come first. Richard may have been willing to marry her, but his heart belonged to Elizabeth. Sophia could not live her life and have children with a man who pined away for her sister. It would eventually break her heart and bring misery upon them all. Her parents would simply have to accept her decision.
But can I?