WolfeLord by Kathryn Le Veque

CHAPTER NINETEEN

“Marcellus?”

Seated in the dusty, cluttered armory upon a stool, looking at the floor, Marcellus lifted his head when he heard his name. He blinked because the door was open and the light from outside was shining in, but he could see a silhouette standing in the doorway.

He knew the voice.

“My lord,” he said, realizing it was Will. Standing up, he grabbed the nearest weapon, pretending to be busy. “How can I be of service?”

Will came into the armory, his gaze fixed on the auburn-haired knight. He’d been looking for him for about an hour but no one seemed to know where he was. Usually, Marcellus was at one of the gatehouses, always in command, always vigilant and visible.

But Will found him hiding in one of the old armories built into the outer wall.

That wasn’t like him.

“I’ve not been in here in a long time,” Will said, looking around the dirty, dusty mess. Reaching out, he picked up a spear and looked at the rusty tip. “All of this was left from the previous command. I thought we’d cleaned it all up.”

Marcellus shook his head. “There are three such armories like this one,” he said. “We’ve been working on the other two because they’re larger. The weapons in this one are mostly crumbling. I’m not sure how much we can improve upon them.”

Will peered at the rusty head before setting the spear back against the wall. “Hopefully, we can salvage them before the Scots try to take the castle back,” he said in jest, picking up one of the wooden shields only to discover that it was broken. Gingerly, he set it down. “I think some of these things were used by the Romans.”

Marcellus smiled weakly. “I would not be surprised, my lord.”

Will looked at a broken mace before turning his full attention to Marcellus. “And it would probably also not surprise you that I’ve not come to discuss broken weapons.”

“My lord?”

“I came about Lily.”

Marcellus’ entire expression changed; Will could see it. He couldn’t shut the armory door without shutting out the light and plunging them into darkness, so he went to stand by the opening to make sure no one was around to overhear their conversation.

Marcellus didn’t give him the opportunity to speak first.

“You have my deepest sympathies, my lord,” he said, seemingly struggling with his composure. “We all had a great deal of respect for Lady Irthington. I have known her for many years and I know she will be missed.”

He was prattling on, perhaps nervously, and Will put up a hand to silence him. “Marcellus,” he said, his voice low but firm. “I know. I have always known.”

Marcellus coughed as if choking on the words that he was preparing to give forth. His head came up and he looked at Will, his eyes wrought with confusion and emotion.

“Know… know what, my lord?” he said feebly.

Will kept his hand up to ease the man, who was clearly shaken by the direction the conversation had taken.

“I know that you offered for Lily’s hand long ago,” he said quietly. “I know that Lily loved you. I know that she continued to love you for the duration of our marriage. Marcellus, I’ve not come to condemn you. In fact, I have always had a great deal of sympathy for you. You and Lily loved one another, but her father demanded she marry me. I had about as much choice in the matter as you and Lily had, so I’ve come to tell you something that I’ve always wanted to say to you.”

Marcellus looked as if he were about to become ill. “My… my lord?”

Will took a deep breath. “I wanted to tell you that I am sorry,” he said. “Had I not come along, it is very possible that Chris would have allowed you to marry Lily, but he did not and, for that, I am sorry. I am sorry that I had no voice in the matter. I was young at the time and it didn’t occur to me to refuse. I had my own father to consider, as you know, and refusing a de Lohr marriage would have probably seen him come down on me harder than most. I am sorry that I came between you and Lily.”

Marcellus’ expression moved from apprehensive to shocked. He stared at Will for several long moments before sinking back onto the stool he’d been sitting on. He seemed rather dazed.

“I… I do not even know what to say,” he said, his voice quivering. “For you to apologize is… madness. Pure madness. You are Lily’s legal and true husband. If anyone should apologize, it should be me. I should apologize for my less than noble behavior. I should apologize for loving your wife when I had no right to. I thought that I would overcome my feelings for her when she married you, but I never did. They are stronger today than they were when I first fell in love with her. I knew I was doing wrong by carrying on with her in secret, but I loved her. I will never love another.”

Will could hear the anguish in the man’s voice and it only made him feel guiltier that he’d kept him from the woman he loved. It had been such a terrible and complicated situation for them all.

“You needn’t apologize,” he said. “I never blamed you. As for carrying on behind my back, you were so careful about it that not even Adria knew and she slept in the same chamber as Lily did for years. How on earth you conceived both Atticus and the new baby is something I shall never understand.”

Marcellus closed his eyes tightly and hung his head. “Did Lily tell you that?”

“Nay.”

Marcellus sighed heavily. “Then I will not ask how you know,” he said. “But please know that we never enjoyed deceiving you. There was always a great deal of guilt about it, but our love was stronger than our guilt.”

Will knew that. In times past, perhaps he wouldn’t have understood the strength of love, but since the introduction of Adria and the delicate relationship they were building, there was a glimmer of comprehension there. He couldn’t imagine loving a woman and not being able to be with her. He couldn’t imagine loving Adria only to see her marry another man.

That was a scenario that Marcellus had to face for many years.

“Marcellus, none of this was fair, least of all to you and Lily,” he said. “You have given your life to a woman you could never have and that is either an incredibly stupid man or an incredibly selfless one. I choose to believe the latter because you and I have served together for many years. I know you and I know your character. Because none of this was fair to you or to Lily, I am going to ask you a question and I want a completely honest answer. Will you do this for me?”

Marcellus looked at him, nodding firmly. “Of course, my lord. I swear it.”

“Do you wish to return to Lioncross with Chris and take the infant with you to raise as your son?”

Marcellus gasped as if an unseen hand had hit him in the gut. “What?” he hissed. “You… you want me to take the child?”

The man’s shock was a palpable thing, causing Will to pity him more than he already did. “It seems only fair to me that you should be allowed to raise your child with the woman you love,” he said. “Atticus is too old, but the infant… he would only know you as his father. You can simply tell everyone that your wife perished in childbirth, which is mostly the truth. I am certain Chris would never say differently.”

“But what about the people at Carlisle?” Marcellus asked. “They know Lily gave birth to a living child. How would you explain his absence?”

“Infants are fragile beings. They die frequently. No one would disbelieve the infant died shortly after birth.”

Marcellus stared at him for a moment before rising to his feet. The emotion was gone from his face, replaced by something strong and appreciative. Will’s understanding of the situation had been like a salve for Marcellus’ grieving heart.

But his actions, his offer, meant more than words could say.

“My lord, I have never heard of a more gracious or noble offer in my entire life,” he said, choked with emotion. “To express my gratitude would seem woefully inadequate, but please know that my respect and gratitude for you is endless. However, I must decline. It is enough to know that you asked me.”

Will frowned. “Why would you decline?”

Marcellus smiled faintly. “Because the babe was born a de Wolfe,” he said simply. “He will remain a de Wolfe. You can provide him with more than I ever can and he will bear the honorable name of de Wolfe for the rest of his life. Let me be proud from afar, my lord, for I shall be. My son will have a better life in your hands than in mine. Both of them will.”

Will nodded faintly, understanding a father’s desire to have the very best for his children and Will took that responsibility very seriously.

“If that is your wish,” he said. “It seems strange that Atticus and the infant should have two fathers who love them, but I suppose that makes them more fortunate than most.”

Marcellus blinked back tears. “I do not know what to say except that it is unfortunate that men will never know just how generous you have been all these years,” he said. “Lily knew it. She always had the greatest admiration for you.”

“And I, her,” Will said. “Speaking of Lily, I believe that Chris will want to take her back to Lioncross for burial and you may go with him, if you wish. I think you’d be happier close to Lily than here in the wilds of the north.”

Marcellus smiled weakly. “That is very understanding of you,” he said. “If Worchester will have me, I shall return to Lioncross.”

“I am sure he will.”

With nothing more to say, Will turned for the door, but Marcellus stopped him. “I hope you will tell Atticus and Alec the truth one day,” he said. “Mayhap you’ll tell them of a man who loved their mother, and them, so much that he only wanted the best for them.”

Will paused by the door, looking at him. “Someday,” he agreed. “I will tell them of their guardian angel who was one of the most selfless men I have ever known.”

“The same could be said for you, my lord.”

With a smile on his lips, Will headed off into the sunlit outer bailey. The keep lay before him and, suddenly, he felt as if he could sleep a little. The conversation with Marcellus had lifted a weight off him that he didn’t even know he had.

But it was gone now.

Perhaps everything was going to be all right, after all.