Egotistically Yours by Hayley Faiman

Chapter Eleven

LAURENT

Sunday is here.

I’ve been waiting almost an entire week for this moment. I help Bethie gather all of Tucker’s things and we load them up into my car to head to my dad’s house. I should be excited to see my new half sister, but that’s not what has me bouncing on my toes. It’s the moment my dad meets his grandson for the first time.

Our situation is not normal, it isn’t like everyone else’s families I know that. But this is ours and Tucker will only know my dad and Tennessee as his grandparents on my side. He’ll never know my mother, so this is a big deal.

“My mom wants to come into town next weekend and see Tucker, spend some time with him and meet you officially,” Bethie murmurs as I drive toward my dad’s house.

Clearing my throat, I nod my head. “Do you want to do a bed in Tucker’s room for her? Maybe we should work on getting his room set up this week then?”

I can’t deny that having Tucker out of our room fills me with a mixture of anxiety and excitement. My cock has been hard as nails, my balls bluer than I ever thought possible since he moved into my room.

Though it’s not like it would matter if he were there or not, Bethie explained to me that she has to have the all clear from the doctor in order to have sex again, and that hasn’t happened yet.

The moment it does, I’m going to get busy and I do not want Tucker anywhere in the vicinity.

“Maybe my mom can help with the room?” she asks, turning her head to look over at me. I can feel her eyes on me and I can’t help but smile as I glance over to her before redirecting my gaze to the highway in front of me.

“Okay, baby. I’ll make sure it’s cleared out by the time she arrives.”

“Laurent?” she calls out after a few moments of silence.

I hum, but don’t verbalize anything as I wait for her to ask me what it is she wants to know. She’s had something on her mind for a few days, I can see the wheels turning, but I haven’t bothered her or attempted to force it out of her, she’ll talk to me when she’s ready and apparently, that’s now.

“Do you think that your family will expect us to get married?” she asks.

My chest squeezes at the question. I don’t know why, but a sense of panic immediately fills me at the thought of matrimony. It shouldn’t. I’ve been thinking of making more children with Bethie and haven’t felt the least bit stressed or apprehensive about that.

But marriage?

I can’t help but think about the absolute shit show of a marriage my parents had my entire life. Every fucking minute was a nightmare with them and I don’t want that for my family, for my children.

Logically, I know that it’s not the institution of marriage that makes a kid’s life a nightmare or not, but on the other hand, that’s my only experience.

“Is that what you and your parents expect?” I ask.

She doesn’t speak immediately, but then I hear her clear her throat. “I wanted to be married, to honeymoon, to find a house and settle down, then start a family after a few years of being married. That didn’t happen though, so I don’t think I have any real expectations anymore.”

Maybe I should feel bad or something. I don’t. I never had expectations of any of this shit—ever. I never wanted a family of my own, never even imagined I would be in this place one day and here I am, but I wouldn’t change it.

I love my son and I really like Bethie. I want to say that I love her, but the truth is we don’t know one another well enough yet. We had a child together, we’ve fucked quite a bit, but the moment I started to really feel anything for her, I pushed her away. I’m not doing that again, so this is all brand new.

We pull up to my dad’s house and I shift the car into park, but I don’t turn the engine off. Shifting my gaze over to hers, I watch her for a moment.

“What if marriage doesn’t happen?”

“What do you mean?” she asks.

Bethie’s blue eyes are wide as she watches me, holding her breath and waiting to hear what I have to say. I don’t know if she’s scared or what she’s feeling, but I need to get this out. We need to be on the same page for all of this, it’s pretty fucking important.

“Would you be okay with being mine, having my children, and not being my wife?”

She watches me for a moment. She doesn’t say anything right away, her eyes searching mine, then she licks her lips. I don’t say anything, waiting to hear her response first. Things could change later, but I honestly don’t think that I’ll ever want to get married.

“You’d be faithful, as if we were married?” she asks softly.

I know that I shouldn’t be surprised that she’s asking me this, especially after the way that I treated her when I ended things the first time. I wasn’t nice, I was immature and I don’t blame her at all for being concerned.

“Always, Bethie. I’ll be honest, truthful, and faithful to you.”

She licks her lips, her eyes searching mine. “Then I would be okay with not being married, but I still have a million questions.”

“We get to a point where this is without a doubt going to be permanent, we’ll figure out all the details, how about that?”

She smiles, her lips trembling slightly. “I think that is a great idea.”

“Good, now let’s let Tucker meet his family.”

Bethie laughs softly and she nods her head once. “Yes, let’s.”

A few moments later, I am carrying a sleeping Tucker in his car seat up my father’s steps, Bethie at my side. This is the first time I’ve ever brought a woman home with the intention of introducing her to my family as my woman.

Although, Bethie knows everyone that is going to be here, so it doesn’t feel as nerve-wracking as it probably should. They all know her and already, they like her too, probably more than they even like me. These are all great fucking things.

The door opens and it’s Lucinda on the other side. Her eyes widen when she looks at me, then her gaze flicks down to the carrier.

“It’s so weird you and Tennessee had babies within weeks of one another. I want to see him in person though, right now,” she demands, stepping to the side to let me pass.

Chuckling, I carry Tucker into the living room and set the car seat down on the floor before I bend down to take him out of the contraption. He makes a little machine gun sound as he stretches and Lucinda ohhhs and ahhhs before she slips him from my hand and walks over to the couch.

Looking over to Bethie, I raise my brows. She just smiles in my direction, then makes a beeline for Tennessee who is sitting on the opposite side of the couch. All three women are sitting on the sofa, two babies between them and I can’t help but smile at the sight. That is until I feel Holden slam into my legs.

I stumble backward before I look down at him, and without a word, I scoop him up into my arms and casually toss him in the air a few feet, catching him as he lets out a scream mixed with a giggle.

BETHANIE

Laurent bends downand picks up Holden effortlessly, tossing him into the air. I watch as he giggles and Laurent laughs as well. I’ve never seen him with Holden before. The times that I was around the family right when things were going bad between us, he was not friendly with Holden at all.

“He’s amazing with him,” Tenny’s voice says, floating over to me.

I turn my head and look over at her. She slides Hanna in my arms and I let out a sigh at the sight of the brand-new baby. She’s beautiful. Absolutely stunning. She looks a lot like Tucker. Not exactly like him, but it’s obvious they’re related.

Lifting my head, I look back over to her. “He is?” I ask, speaking of Laurent and Holden again.

Tennessee hums, her eyes are focused on Holden and Laurent. I watch her for a moment, and she turns back to look at me. “He is. Things changed when Susan went to prison, when he took over Astor Investments, when Landry really got LoneSTAR Investments off the ground. It’s been so different. Laurent has been different.”

“What’s Tucker’s full name, he’s so beautiful,” Lucinda calls out, not realizing that Tennessee and I were speaking, as we were being so quiet about it.

I don’t think, I just speak. I answer her and the entire room goes completely quiet when I do. “Tucker Laurent Clark,” I state.

“Bethanie?” Laurent rasps.

Lifting my head, I look over at him and my lips part. I hadn’t told him Tucker’s middle name. I’m not sure if I was keeping it from him or if I just omitted it. I think that part of me was keeping it from him until I felt like I could trust him—trust this.

“Tucker Laurent Clark,” I repeat on a whisper, my eyes locked in on his and not looking away.

He watches me for a moment, then turns to Lawrence who is standing a few feet away and hands Holden to him. I watch him march toward me. My heart starts to race as he makes his way closer to me.

Laurent holds his hand out for me silently when he’s directly in front of me. I’m too terrified, too nervous to do or say anything. So instead, I lift my hand and slip my palm in his. He starts to walk out of the room, tugging me behind him down the hallway until we reach the bathroom.

He swings me around and I practically fly into the room, grabbing a hold of the vanity’s edge before I turn around to face him. He closes and locks the door behind him, then in an instant he is in front of me. I don’t know what I expect, but when he reaches his arms up, I flinch as he cups my cheeks.

His lips smash down against mine in a hard, bruising, overtaking, consuming kiss. He lifts his head, my breathing comes out in pants, my heart slamming against my ribs as I look up at him in surprise.

“You named him after me,” he growls.

Licking my lips, my eyes water. “I did,” I whisper.

“Fuck,” he hisses.

“What?”

He shakes his head, his gaze searching mine for a long, silent moment. “Nothing. Just fuck, I don’t deserve you. Didn’t back then and sure as shit don’t now.”

“Laurent.”

His lips touch mine in a much gentler, sweeter kiss. “I don’t, Bethie. I’m keeping you though, because believe it or not, this is exactly what I never knew I wanted.”

I don’t know what to say. My words have been stolen from me, and all I want is more of his mouth on mine. He doesn’t kiss me again though. Instead, he takes a step back, his hand falling from my face, but his eyes never leave mine.

“If you want a ring. I’ll buy you one. If you want a party, you can have one. If you want to legally change your name, we can do that on paper. I’ll make stipulations on everything I own that you’re entitled to half.”

“But a wedding, a traditional marriage?” I ask, more curious than anything.

He shakes his head. “That I can’t do.”

“Do you want to tell me why?”

He looks behind him to the closed door, then shifts his gaze back to meet mine. “My life wasn’t like yours, Bethie. My childhood, my parents, they aren’t like yours. You tell me about your parents being married, about your childhood and mine looked nothing like that.”

I don’t know why I hadn’t realized it before, why it’s taken me this long to see the depth of the pain that Laurent hides about his childhood. Maybe because he’s gotten so good at hiding it, maybe because he wouldn’t allow me to see it until now. Whatever the case, I see it and I understand it now.

“Okay, Laurent. Right now, I’m good with all of that.”

He watches me for a moment, then nods. I don’t know if he read my words correctly, because I do want to get married one day, but if he’s not ready yet, then that’s okay with me.

I love him and I want nothing more in this world than to proudly become Mrs. Laurent Astor, but only when he’s ready for that. Until then, I will happily take on the role of just being—his.