Unleashed By her Bear by Felicity Heaton

Chapter 12

Rune kept his focus on the trees that surrounded him, on the mountains that peeked through the green canopy from time to time, and on the flashes of blue sky. Anything to stop himself from shifting his senses to Callie. He didn’t want to be aware of her, even when some part of him was—some deep, buried part of him where he wasn’t quite master.

A part of him that had coaxed him into talking to her, into opening up a little to someone for once, all in some noble desire to show her that she wasn’t alone and that he was more than capable of protecting her.

Only now he felt as if he had ripped open his ribcage and exposed his heart to her, and he didn’t like it.

He stared at the trees. The mountains. The sky. Seeking calm in them, peace that eluded him as his mind constantly worked, churning as it ran over the things he had told her, as it broke down every reaction he had sensed and seen in Callie and studied it in detail, despite his best efforts to let it all roll off his back.

The feel of her eyes on his nape had him growling over his shoulder at her, warning her to stop looking at him. She scowled at him, a flicker of hurt in her eyes, and he cursed himself. He didn’t mean to be angry with her, but he couldn’t help it. Opening up to her had made him feel weak and the way she had looked at him, had spoken with that damned note of pity in her soft voice, had raised his hackles. Now he couldn’t shake the urge to lash out at her, to blame her for everything, when she had done nothing wrong.

Rune scrubbed a hand down his face.

He was tired, moody about that too. He should have taken a moment to prepare before they had left Black Ridge. Instead, he had left home without any provisions or form of shelter, and the day was wearing on. Night at this time of year was still cold, hit figures low enough that sometimes it snowed up in the mountains. Sometimes it snowed a lot lower than the peaks too.

“How much further is it?” Callie grumbled.

Rune didn’t want to tell her, because if he did, she was going to be mad at him.

He scanned the sky as he reached a point where the trees ended and the dirt became rock, charted the position of the sun and calculated how far they were from the White Wolf pack.

“A while,” he muttered, because it was better than admitting it was still hours of hiking before they reached the wolves, and he had the feeling it would be dark before they made it there.

She sighed and he stopped and looked at her, a startling feeling rolling through him—concern. He took a good look at her, saw in the tight lines of her face that she was tired and her ankle was hurting, but she didn’t mention it. She soldiered on, passing him and taking the lead.

It didn’t make him feel any less of a dick.

“I could carry you for a while.” Rune started after her.

She scoffed. “No thanks. My stomach is too empty again to have your shoulder jammed into it.”

“I didn’t mean—forget it.” He stomped past her, told himself that she had every right to think he had intended to toss her over his shoulder since that was how he had treated her more than once before.

Callie stopped and stared at his back, a stunned edge to her voice as she said, “You were going to carry me nicely.”

He huffed. “Offer’s expired.”

Her sigh said it all. Fine, he was being an asshole again, blaming things on her, not wanting to shoulder any of the fault himself. He didn’t mean to be like that, but since he had talked to her, he had been slowly spiralling into the mother of all bad moods. He had only told Callie the bare minimum about his past, but he had been thinking about every little detail since then, couldn’t stop himself from dredging up memories.

He glanced back at Callie, fear trickling through him as he braced himself. She had been looking at him differently since he had told her about the cages and his captivity, and he didn’t like it. He didn’t want his past to colour her opinion of him, didn’t want her thinking he was some broken, messed-up male who had no hope of adjusting to this world.

Even when he felt as if he was.

She stopped prodding her ankle and lifted her head, her amber gaze softening as it landed on him, as she looked at his face. Clearly, he wasn’t doing a great job of hiding how torn he felt around her, how on edge and off-balance she made him feel, because she looked as if she wanted to come to him.

She looked as if she wanted to wrap her arms around him, as if he needed her to hold him together.

He wasn’t broken.

He wasn’t.

Words rose to the tip of his tongue, but he denied them. He had already told her too much about himself, still couldn’t believe he had confessed that he was no good at knowing how to behave around others. That had slipped from him before he could stop it.

But maybe it was good that she knew.

He cursed himself as he looked at her and thought about how he had treated her.

That secret part of him that wished he could be more like Saint, like Lowe, hell, even like Knox, pushed to the surface, making him feel even more inadequate and unequipped to deal with this world. Saint would know how to treat a female, even one from a breed he had no love for. Lowe would have been kind to her from the outset, helping her. Even Knox might have shown his good side to Callie rather than tying her up and questioning her as if she were a danger to everyone.

Callie slowly closed the distance between them, no trace of pity in her soft gaze, in the gentleness of her expression. He was grateful for that, hated how she had looked at him and didn’t want her to think him any less of a male just because he had been through hell. She had been through her own version of hell, and while he felt bad for her, he would never treat her as if she were fragile and liable to break.

She was strong for surviving it and carrying on, for looking to the future and seeing something worth fighting for there.

She stopped close to him, her amber eyes bewitching him as the sunlight brightened them and caught the flecks of gold, bringing them out. Her rosy lips curled into the faintest of smiles as she angled her head back, causing her black hair to tumble away from her slender shoulders.

“Taking a break?” she said, her words as soft as her look.

He nodded.

Flexed his fingers at his side and resisted the urge that swept through him, a need so powerful that it was hard to deny it.

He wanted to tunnel his fingers into her glossy onyx waves and tug her to him, until she was pressed against him, her soft warmth heating his body.

He wanted to kiss her.

Instead, he stared down at her, his mind rolling back years to attempt to recall the male he had been before the cage. Had he been a good male, like Saint and Lowe? Good but a little wild, like Knox? Had he been a male who would have been worthy of someone as beautiful as the wolf standing before him?

His memories of the male he had been before the cage were too dim though, like faint shadows that slipped through his fingers and turned to smoke whenever he tried to grasp them.

He knew one thing though.

Whoever he had been, he wasn’t that male anymore.

What did Callie make of the male standing before her?

He wanted to know, but at the same time he feared hearing what she thought of him. He hadn’t been kind to her. There was a high chance she hated him and he deserved that.

Yet she was comfortable around him, and the way she looked at him at times made him feel that she trusted him.

He wasn’t sure what he had done to deserve that trust.

For a heartbeat, she looked as if she might say something, but then she looked away from him, gazed out at the valley and sighed.

Rune looked there too as he thought about his pride and about her reason for wanting to get to Rourke. They were both the same in a way. Both of them had lost something important to them and both of them had been forced into a cage, taken against their will, and both of them had ended up needing to find a new home.

“Thinking about home?” Callie murmured.

He glanced at her, a flicker of a frown knitting his eyebrows as he cast her a look that he knew had conveyed his confusion since she smiled.

“You have that look I think I wear when I’m thinking about home.” Her shoulders lifted slightly and then dropped as she sighed, as her eyes roamed over the mountains and the trees, a faraway look in them.

Had her home been as remote and wild as this valley? Anywhere near as beautiful? He passed through Revelstoke every time he and Maverick drove to Vancouver for the winter, escaping the snow and the urge to hibernate that had started coming back to him in the last few years.

He made a mental note to stop in Revelstoke the next time he had cause to be passing through and check it out. He wanted to see where Callie had grown up. He wanted to see the place she had called home.

“I was.” He stared in the direction of Black Ridge, torn between telling her what was on his mind and keeping it to himself. Telling her won. “I don’t remember where I grew up. I don’t remember anything about the time that came before—well… It doesn’t matter anyway. This is home now.”

“I hope I can find a new home in the White Wolf pack.” Those words were quiet as they slipped from her lips, had his gaze gravitating to her again.

He was sure that she would, and he was sure she would feel as moved by the acceptance into a new pack as Rune had felt when Saint had offered him a place in his pride.

Rune had felt humbled and unable to believe Maverick when the male had tried to convince him that Saint wanted to accept them into his pride. He had been convinced the grizzly would turn them away. Hell, he had been convinced that Maverick would leave him and he would end up alone.

Instead, he had ended up with a new family and a place where he felt he belonged, somewhere he could heal and become a better male, and he counted his blessings every damned day.

“You’ll find your home,” Rune said, sure of that, feeling it in every beat of his heart as he gazed at Callie. A spark of hope lit her eyes and he found he liked seeing it, and liked that he had caused it. “The White Wolf pack will be good to you, Callie. They’ll be like Black Ridge is for me—a new family.”

He averted his gaze when she looked across at him, stared into the distance at the mountains and the forest, at the glittering snake of the creek as it wound its way down from the glacier, peeking through the canopy of rich deep green in places.

Rune flexed his fingers and curled them into fists.

Exhaled.

“I’m sorry about how I was with you.” He let those words slip from him, didn’t think about them, just let them spill from his lips. If he thought about them, he would feel that stab of vulnerability again and would fight them, would probably end up lashing out at her, blaming her for the fact he had opened up a little, when in reality he wanted to let her in. He wanted her to know him better. Gods help him. Gods help her too. He huffed. “Black Ridge… Saint and Maverick… Lowe and Knox… all the females… they’re my family and… I’d do anything to keep them safe. I’d die for them if it came down to it. My history with wolves is not great, and I’m trying to overcome it, but it’s hard sometimes. When I smelled Carrigan on you, I didn’t know it was his scent until you mentioned him and it all made sense. I smelled him on you and I got angry… and I’m sorry.”

There.

It was all out there now.

She could either forgive him or damn him.

It was out of his hands.

“Carrigan is the reason you hate wolves,” she whispered.

Rune nodded and swallowed hard, braced himself against the images he knew would play out in his head like some twisted horror movie, or a nightmare where he had no control over the outcome of events.

But Callie placed her hand on his arm, and instead of being bombarded by images of Grace having to fight a huge polar bear male, all his focus was drawn to her. He stared at her, aware of how lost and wounded he looked, aware that all the pain he still carried in his heart, all the shame, was there in his eyes for her to see.

“I won’t ask,” she murmured, three words that offered him relief, together with that look in her eyes that told him that if he ever wanted to talk about what had happened in his past, no matter what it was, that she would listen.

And she wouldn’t judge him.

The part of him that constantly expected her to turn her back on him, that constantly expected everyone to do that, faded into the background as he gazed down into her eyes, losing himself in them.

Warmed by the fact she hadn’t distanced herself now that she knew a little about his past and the sort of male he was.

If anything, she had moved closer to him instead.

“We should probably get moving.” She smiled, an awkward edge to it as her hand dropped from his arm, grazing his elbow, and she hobbled away from him.

Rune followed her, that warmth she ignited in him spreading as she dropped back to walk beside him as the track opened up, snaking around the side of the mountain. It wasn’t far to the pass now. Maybe they could make it to the White Wolf pack before dark.

He glanced at Callie, a sudden need to stop that from happening striking him. He needed more time with her, found himself thinking of a thousand ways to delay her reaching Rourke and leaving his side. He had only just met her, but she had left her mark on him, had utterly bewitched him in less than a day.

And he had the feeling that if he had more time with her, she would do more than that.

She would make him fall for her.

That scared him a little, had him wanting to draw away from her and bring up barriers between them even as a part of him wanted to move closer to her instead, craved being near her and was eager to discover what would happen if he didn’t push her away.

They trekked in silence, every minute feeling like an hour as he wrestled with himself, as he tried to be on alert and failed dismally. Callie didn’t share his problem. Her focus was seemingly on the world around them at all times and he couldn’t get his away from her. Maybe he was reading into things, seeing what he wanted to see whenever she dared to glance at him, whenever they had been close to each other over the past day.

There had been a spark of interest in her eyes more than once. Had he imagined that or was she attracted to him?

He glanced at the scant distance between them, watching her hand swaying back and forth so temptingly close to his. If he moved his hand only a few inches towards her, he could easily brush her fingers. How would she react to that?

Would she draw away? Be horrified? Or would she give him that look she had a few hours ago, when he swore she had wanted him to kiss her?

Rune battled with himself over the next mile, fighting the urge to touch her hand so he could know whether he was alone in his feelings or not.

“Is this the pass?” Callie looked at him, her gaze searing him, setting his blood on fire.

He lifted his eyes from her hand, locking them on her face. Evening light cast a glow over her delicate features and darkened her hair, and his breath hitched as her wide luminous eyes met his. Gods, she was beautiful.

When a puzzled look knitted her fine eyebrows, he cleared his throat and shook himself out of his reverie.

“Yeah,” he grunted. “Still a few miles to the other side though. We’ll follow the river.”

“River?” Her eyes gained a curious edge.

He nodded. “Cuts through a ravine not far from here. Comes off the glacier. There’s a nice waterfall around halfway along the pass where the trail drops towards the White Wolf valley.”

And Rune wanted to stop there, wanted to sit with Callie a while and see if she found it as beautiful as he did.

“Let’s go then.” She smiled at him again, hitting him hard in the heart with it.

He could only nod as he tried to gather his wits, attempting to shake off the debilitating effect of that smile. She made him weak in a way no one had before her. Not even Grace. Something about this wolf stripped him of his strength and had him willing to fall to his knees before her if she would only gift him another glorious smile.

Hell, he would settle for just the chance to look into her eyes.

Gods, he was done for.

He had seen enough bear males at Black Ridge mooning after their females to know that he had it bad for Callie and that leaving her at the White Wolf pack was going to be hard. Maybe it was for the best though. A bear like him didn’t deserve a female like her. He didn’t deserve any female.

Rune dropped his gaze to her hand again, the urge to brush her fingers with his growing stronger by the second.

What if he risked it all and she rejected him?

It was only a few miles to the wolves now and he could leave as soon as he had dropped her off. He hadn’t known her long and she probably wouldn’t bust his heart, and he would get over her, resuming his normal life.

What if he didn’t risk it all?

He would never know her true feelings, would drop her off at the wolves and return to Black Ridge, and probably end up plagued by thoughts of her and what might have happened.

He frowned at her hand.

What if he risked it all and she accepted him?

He would be the luckiest damned bear on Earth.

Having Callie by his side, in his life, filling it with warmth and light would make even the hardest days easy to face. He was sure she could heal him, maybe even restore him to be a semblance of the male he had been before the cage, and he would be blessed to have her.

Rune went in circles, debating which path to take. Risk it or don’t?

They turned a bend in the track, a point where it narrowed and forced Callie to move closer to him. He stared at her hand. There were less than two inches between them now. It would be so easy to graze her fingers with his, and if she reacted badly, he could play it off as an accident.

Rune swallowed his racing heart.

Made a decision.

Risk it.

He eased his hand towards hers.

Callie tensed and pivoted to face the way they had come.

Rune didn’t need to ask her what was wrong as a breeze swept around the mountain to gently blow her hair from her face.

He smelled wolves.