More Than This by Dominique Wolf
CHAPTER 43:
Isabella
I
watched as he brought the glass of champagne to his lips and leaned his head slightly back, allowing the alcohol to move down his throat. I watched as he swallowed, his Adam's apple moving with the motion and ran his tongue over his lips in a quick movement. He flicked his eyes to mine and there was something different to them now. They had been swimming with sadness and anger recently but not tonight. Tonight there was a flicker in them and I couldn't quite place what it was. There was a constant interest in his eyes whenever he looked at me and I knew he was working hard to hide the desire that was pushing its way through. I knew because I was feeling the same. Seeing him so well-groomed and in this well-fitted suit was sending my mind into a frenzy. The pressure between my legs deepened with each longing look.
I needed him.
I took a deep breath in and brought the champagne to my lips. I focused on that instead of Giovanni. I wouldn't be able to control myself much longer if I allowed my mind to continuously wander back to where it wanted to be.
“As a friend, I'd like to tell you how beautiful you look tonight,” Giovanni said, leaning closer to me so I could hear him over the blaring music.
His voice brushed against my skin, sending an electrifying arousal up and down my veins. Before I could thank him, he opened his mouth to continue.
“But as someone that's in love with you, I have to tell you that it's taking every inch of self-control I have not to take you back to our room and have my way with you.”
My breath caught in my throat and I couldn't help but tug at my bottom lip to contain the growing sensation inside of me.
I flicked my eyes to meet his. “You can't say things like that.”
He leaned closer to my ear. “I can’t help it. Not with that dress on.”
The blush spread across my cheeks and I couldn't focus on anything but his breath against my skin. I thought about what it felt like to have his lips against me, exploring every inch of my body that was possible. The way he ran his hands over me, knowing exactly what he was doing. The way he felt insi-
“Isabella!” Marcina exclaimed, stopping my thoughts in their tracks. “You're here!”
“Hi, Marcina.” I leaned forward and kissed both her cheeks as we greeted each other.
She turned to greet Giovanni. “I'm so happy that you two are here.”
She was smiling and this time, her smile met her eyes. When we saw her the other day, there was something missing. She didn't have the same contagious energy that she had when we first met. I couldn't blame her, not with everything going on.
Cecilio Velázquez walked with an air of arrogance to him as he approached us. I watched as Giovanni tensed up - it was a slight change that no one but me would have been able to notice. His jaw clenched and displayed his cheekbones hidden underneath his facial hair and his breathing was more controlled. I could see he was trying to control himself. I shifted closer to him and slid my hand into his, interlocking our fingers. I squeezed gently to remind him that I was here.
“Giovanni,” his father greeted with a slight nod before turning to me. “Isabella, right?”
I nodded. “Sí señor, nice to see you again.”
I was lying, but I had to be polite. I had seen Giovanni's father twice and both were interactions I didn't want to remember.
“So, not the pregnant one,” he quipped.
“Cecilio!” Marcina exclaimed and looked up at him, a look of horror spread across her face.
I jerked my head back in surprise and turned to Giovanni who was already glaring at his father.
“¿Que carajo te pasa?” Giovanni snapped.
I felt as if I had been slapped. Clearly, the animosity between Giovanni and his father had passed the point of no return. I was actually disgusted by his distasteful comment, but I kept my anger to myself for the sake of Giovanni. I didn't need to be reminded of Casey's pregnancy and especially not from his father.
“What?” his father objected. “Is that not public knowledge?”
Giovanni was seething. He didn't take his eyes off his father and I could tell Cecilio was enjoying this. I had never seen two people who were related that acted more like strangers. It was shocking to me. Marcina's face settled on a look of embarrassment over her husband's behaviour.
“And what about you?” Giovanni muttered. “Should we find out how much is public knowledge about your life?”
Before Cecilio could respond, an older couple interrupted to greet him. He switched from hostile father to welcoming host and it was jarring. Both he and Marcina settled into the correct public persona they were supposed to be sharing tonight - the happy couple. Giovanni's hand squeezed mine and I could feel the rage radiating off of him. I pulled him to the bar on the other side of the room away from his parents.
“Giovanni.” I turned to him as we reached the bar, his eyes were deadlocked across the room. “Hey.” I reached out and cupped his face, turning him to face me. The sadness returned in his eyes but now they were also laced with anger.
“I hate him,” he muttered.
I used to think that was an exaggeration, but after witnessing the coldness in their relationship, it wasn't surprising to me.
“He's one to judge, look at the fuck up that is his marriage,” Giovanni continued. “But he'll fucking say shit like that. It's ridiculous.”
I pushed my own irritation at his father aside. I was here for Giovanni so I was going to be the support he needed.
“I think we could both use a shot,” I suggested.
He turned towards the bar and signaled for the bartender. “Two shots of tequila, please.”
“Just try to avoid your dad tonight. You know he wants to get under your skin so you need to be the bigger person.”
The bartender placed the two shots in front of us and we reached for them, bringing them up to our lips. I tilted my head back as the alcohol burned down my throat. Any nerves I had slowly started to disappear, leaving me with a fake sense of calm.
“Thank you for being here,” he murmured.
I reached out and cupped his face, running my nails through his hair. “Of course, I'm happy to be here for you.”
“As a friend?” He flicked his eyes to meet mine.
How could I be friends with someone I was completely in love with?
I couldn't believe the clear divide between my head and my heart. My head was constantly warning me not to take this any further. If I did, it would only hurt more if our relationship imploded again. My heart was dying for me to reach out to him. To show him how much I loved him.
And my body was becoming a raging deprived bitch.
I wanted to devour him in any way I could. There was a struggle going on inside of me and the more he looked at me with the intensity that he was, the more my desire was starting to push itself to the front. He slowly started to run his hand up and down my arm, the electricity coursing through my veins.
“As a friend,” I repeated, knowing I didn’t believe that myself.
He ignored what I said and his eyes wandered down to my lips. “You deserve to be worshipped, Isabella.”
My breath caught in my throat.
“And I'll be waiting here until you let me.”
I didn't know what to say. I tugged at my lip in an attempt to control my desire from pushing itself through. He was killing me tonight and I didn't know how much longer I was going to be able to keep myself from giving in to my feelings.
***
I was having a great time.
Penelope and I were standing behind Giovanni and Alvaro as they joined a blackjack table. We were cheering them on as the champagne kept flowing. We had worked our way through the program for the evening and now the party really started. Cecilio had given a speech during dinner welcoming everyone and spoke more about the charity that tonight was benefitting. Beyond Borders was an organisation that was close to his heart as they helped migrant families who came to Spain with nothing. He shared more about those families and the challenges facing immigrants and it was the first time I noticed a flicker of emotion inside of him. It was surprising considering he didn't have any of that towards his own son.
“Twenty,” the card dealer announced to Giovanni.
I shrieked with excitement and slid my hands around his shoulders, leaning my head by his neck. “You're killing it, babe!”
I didn't mean to say it but it came so naturally to me. His eyes lit up at the nickname but he didn't say anything about it.
“Alvaro, come on!” Penelope groaned.
I burst out laughing. Alvaro hadn't won a round yet and Penelope was losing hope in her husband.
“This game is rigged.” Alvaro tossed his cards on the table.
“Don't be a sore loser, hermano.” Giovanni laughed.
“You're stealing my money here.”
We all laughed and I was enjoying their company. They arrived shortly after the interaction between Giovanni and Cecilio. Alvaro was helpful in getting Giovanni to calm down. He reminded him that they just had to get through tonight and then they could deal with their family. I downed the rest of my drink and placed it on the empty table behind us. I only had a few drinks, but it was enough for the alcohol to have settled over me. I was feeling really good.
“I need to run to the ladies room quickly,” I murmured to Giovanni and reached for my bag.
“Do you want me to walk with you?” he offered.
I shook my head. “I'll only be a couple of minutes.”
I reached for my clutch bag on the table and positioned it underneath my arm. I grabbed the bottom of my dress so I didn't walk all over it. I pushed through the crowds of people and made my way to the back where the bathrooms were. The music was no longer blaring in my ears as I strolled up the stairs further away from the party. The building was exquisite. The archaic architecture continued inside with the gothic designs against the wall. Even the staircase was fancy as it spiraled itself to the next floor. Each step was illuminated with light from underneath it and I followed the stairs to the top where the bathrooms were. They were at the end of the hall, but I stopped in my tracks about halfway when I heard my name from behind me.
The déjà vu settled over me as I turned to meet Nate. He stood with his hands in the pockets of his well-fitted navy suit. His hair was perfectly styled in place and I noticed his beard had continued to grow out. He always managed to look so well put together.
“Nate,” I breathed.
“I didn't expect to see you here,” he said.
I shifted awkwardly. “I'm actually here with someone.”
“Giovanni Velázquez?”
I nodded.
“I saw you arrive with him. I didn't know you were seeing him,” he commented.
“I'm not. I mean, I was.” I sighed and stopped myself from the unnecessary explanations. “It's complicated.”
“Well, you look beautiful.”
I was surprised by his compliment. He shifted uncomfortably and pulled his hands from his pockets. A couple of women left the lady's room and strolled past us, laughing at something one of them had said.
“Thank you.”
We stood in awkward silence and I was dying to get out of this interaction. It was weird to be standing here with him. Someone I had such a long history with and yet, we were complete strangers now. I wasn't sure what to say to him and he clearly felt the same. He ran his fingers over his hair and I noticed his nervous twitch in his hand. He always got like that when he had something to say. I just didn't feel like entertaining this conversation.
“Well, I should go.”
I turned towards the direction of the bathroom.
“I'm sorry, Isabella.”
I stopped in my tracks. Why was he apologizing to me? I took a deep breath in and turned to face him again.
“Why are yo-,” I started to say before he stepped closer, interrupting my sentence.
“I never apologised to you for how I left things between us and after I saw you at the airport, I haven't been able to stop thinking about you.”
I jerked my head back in surprise. Where the hell was all this coming from? His face was riddled with nerves and I had never seen him like this.
“Nate, you don't need to apologize. Everything worked out the way it was meant to.”
“Except it didn't,” he retorted.
“What are you talking about?”
His eyes were filled with sadness. “I should never have left you that night.”
My breath caught in my throat. What was he doing? Why was he doing this now? Now when he had a fiancé and I had moved on with my life?
“Nate, you have a fiancé,” I recalled. “You shoul-”.
He interrupted me again. “I broke up with Christina.”
Now my jaw dropped. They had only been engaged for a couple of months and now here he was standing in front of me telling me that they broke up.
“What happened?”
He lifted his eyes to meet mine. “I saw you again and I realised I made a mistake.”
I was shocked. The last thing I expected tonight was for Nate to be saying what he was. What did he want me to do with that information? I looked at him and I was reminded of our friendship and the love we once shared, but it was nothing more than a distant memory now. It wasn't something I longed for. Not when I had gotten a taste of what real love was.
“Nate, you didn't want to get married.” I was trying to process all the information. “When you broke up with me you said it was because you didn't want to get married, but then you got engaged.”
“I know.” He let out an exasperated sigh and stepped closer to me again. “I got scared, okay? I got scared of getting married, but then we broke up and when I met Christina I-”.
“You obviously loved her enough to propose,” I said softly. “And that's gre-”.
“I loved you, too.” He reached for my hand. “I still love you.”
What the hell was he doing?
I didn't want a confession of love from him. I didn't need it. I had moved on with my life and was finally living a life I wanted to live. Granted, I had a lot of my own shit to figure out, but compared to the controlled life I was living back in London, this was so much better. I could never go back to the life I had.
I pulled my hand away. “Nate, I don't know why you're telling me this.”
He stepped closer to me again. “I need you to know that I want you back, Isabella. I'm sorry that I left you, I should never have don-”.
This time I was the one who interrupted him. “Nate no, you can't be saying this.”
“Why not? You need to know how I feel.”
I shook my head. “Why are you doing this now? It's been so long since we were together.”
“I know and seeing you again just reminded me of how good we were together.” He reached for my hand again.
“That's over now,” I retorted and pulled away. “That's been over for a long time.”
“We can have it again, just think ab-”.
I interrupted him. “Nate, I'm sorry but I can't.”
“Why not?”
“Because I'm in love with Giovanni.”
