Fatal Princess by Ella Miles

Beckett

Odette is in the bathroom doing god knows what. I quickly climbed into bed and am hoping to be fast asleep before she comes out. I doubt I’ll ever sleep again, though. I have too many thoughts in my head—about Ri, about my brother.

I declared war tonight. If my brother wouldn’t talk to me before, he won’t talk to me now.

And I don’t know how to put a stop to any of it.

I need to find a way to send a message to Kai and Enzo to warn them, to tell them I don’t want this.

I can try to delay things as long as possible. I can convince the Retribution Kings we need to see how the game plays out with Ri and what Corsi does. We may need his army. I doubt they will let me keep playing in the game, though.

Delay—that’s all I can hope to do. I’ve decided my fate. I’ve done all that I can to save Ri, but will it be worth the cost?

How do I protect Enzo and Kai?

I smirk. I don’t.

They are more than capable of winning a war against these idiots. And if I help steer the Retribution Kings in the wrong direction, their odds increase. Kai won’t let anything happen to her family.

My head falls back on my pillow, a bit relaxed for the first time. My family will destroy the Retribution Kings, and then I’ll be free. They’ll be pissed at me, more pissed than all the other stupid shit I’ve done combined, but I’ll willfully spend my life making it up to them.

The bathroom door opens; I squeeze my eyes shut and calm my breathing. I meditate to stay as still as possible, so Odette thinks I’m asleep as she comes to bed.

She doesn’t say anything, not even a whisper of my name. Maybe she’s had a long day too and just wants to sleep.

I feel the bed shift and the covers move as she climbs into bed. I don’t move. I don’t know if I’m a snorer or not. I don’t know the typical sounds I make when I sleep, but I’m hoping it’s silence.

Odette rolls over to me and kisses me sweetly on the forehead. Thank god. She’s just going to kiss me goodnight.

“If you want her to live through the night, you’ll stop faking sleep and fuck me.”

Her words are ice cold and delivered to make an impact.

I open my eyes but still don’t move.

“Ri helped you. She helped you escape when you thought you had no options. Why would you kill her?”

“Because you prefer her to me. You don’t belong with her; you belong with me. You don’t want a girl who can hold her own on a battlefield right next to you. You want a girl who will be waiting at home with a good meal and warm bed when you return.”

“You can’t cook.”

“I can learn.”

I grunt. “Don’t threaten her life. If you want something from me, then figure out how to convince me.”

I roll on top of her, pinning her to the bed and tightening my hand around her throat, making it difficult for her to breathe. “Don’t threaten Ri ever again, or I’ll kill you. Understand?”

I scare her like the monster I am. She’s destroyed my life, and I want to end her. But I can’t—at least not until Ri is completely safe. Ri needs to have run away or married a man who is strong enough to protect her.

I cringe at that thought.

She nods, but when I release her throat, she becomes maniacal. Her nails dig into my skin, and she cackles like a cartoon villain.

“I own you, Beckett. You can’t threaten me without threatening her. You needed Caius’s help to save her. He did that, but he’s also getting close to her. He might have even fucked her in her misery over losing you. He’s slowly gaining her trust. And he’s got the best shot of winning the game and marrying her.”

If I could kill her with a look, then I would. My eyes brand my hatred into her body.

“If you don’t do exactly what I say, if you so much as lay another finger on me, and most definitely if you kill me, Caius will end her. Caius likes her. He’d love for her to be his wife, but he loves me. He’s loyal to me. He’d do anything to avenge his sister’s death. So threaten me again and see what happens. Mark me again, and I’ll let him know exactly where to put the same marks on her body.”

My eyes well with tears, but I don’t let them out.

“What do you want?” I ask with as much strength as I can muster.

She grins, knowing she’s won. And she has, but she won’t always.

I don’t regret tying her life to Ri’s. It means Ri is safe. Caius and the Retribution Kings will do everything to keep her safe. But someday, Odette will get what’s coming to her.

“I want you to fuck me like I’m her.”

I swallow hard against my throat. That’s impossible. I can’t fuck anyone like I do Ri. It will never be the same.

Odette undoes the robe she’s wearing, revealing some red lacy lingerie. There was a time when I would have found her sexy as hell. Now I want to throw her into the depths of hell.

“Beckett, I’m waiting.” Odette just lies spread out on the bed, waiting for me to do all the work.

Fuck, it would have been so much easier to just let her ride my dick. I should have let her take from me and not be an active participant.

God, how am I going to do this?

I’m just wearing my boxer briefs as I position myself over her body. Just two thin pieces of fabric separate us.

It’s just sex. Just fucking, I try to convince myself.

It’s just putting my heart and soul in a shredder. This will destroy me. I’ll never forgive myself. Ri won’t either. I won’t ever be able to fuck a woman without thinking about this moment. This mistake. This…

Odette sinks her nails into my chest, drawing blood. I curse.

“Get on with it, baby. I’ve been waiting a long time to have you again.”

My cock is anything but hard.

I remove it from my briefs and close my eyes, thinking of Ri. Of what snarky comment she might say to me. Of her red lips wrapped around my cock. Of her whimpers and cries when I touch her.

A hand reaches out and strokes my length. I squeeze my eyes shut tighter.

It’s Ri. It’s Ri. It’s Ri.

I moan as the hand pumps me. It does feel good.

And then I’m guided toward her entrance.

I keep my eyes shut, my arm trembling against the headboard. The second I feel a drop of moisture on my cock, I thrust hard, ripping through her. I thrust viciously. If I don’t, I won’t be able to stomach it.

I pound as hard as I can. I’m out of breath, so is she. I hear her head hitting the headboard.

Ri.

Ri.

Ri.

I force myself to think of her, not reality.

Every part of my body knows it’s not her, though. No matter how tightly I squeeze my eyes shut, I can’t keep tears from dripping down my face and onto hers.

She cries out, and I know she’s orgasming.

“Come with me, baby,” she purrs.

I can’t. There’s no fucking way I can or will. But I go through the motions. I make the fake sounds, the fake grunts, and jerks into her body.

She doesn’t call me out.

I open my eyes to see her smirking in victory up at me.

I pull myself out and off of her as fast as I can, heading to the bathroom before she can protest. I intend to shower to wash her stench off me, but I don’t make it that far, vomiting violently into the toilet first.

I’ll never forgive myself. That was too much. I made too many mistakes that led me here. I’ve never felt so much despair, emptiness, darkness. All I really want to do right now is find Ri and tell her to hold me as she drives a dagger into my heart to make the pain stop.