The Bear’s Nanny by Erin Havoc

10

KIERAN

MY STOMACH FLIPS as I kill the engine. Usually, I’d just change into my bear to do my job as a ranger. With Astrid around, I have to be more careful. This is another day I drive to another part of town just to shift.

My bear has been very patient, to be honest. Maybe because now I can shift every day. Ever since he chose Astrid, all he’s done is ask for her. But he hasn’t driven me half-mad with need. Though this connection calls to me in the most basic way, my brain still has control over everything.

The mating bond is a call from nature. Not completely understood; we can just guess how it works. Since we’re not out for society, we can’t exactly get scientists studying it. Being supernatural works with a sort of magic. Not the same magic Sabrina uses. Something more nature-like.

The story goes that it’s because of ancient gods. Before the English settled into America, way before England was a thing, gods in the Old World used to punish humans by changing them into animals. Some humans stayed that way for the rest of their lives. Others had something in their blood that allowed a change back into human form and full control over their animals.

Is it true? There’s no way to be sure. Since we want to stay hidden, we can’t exactly find out if it’s just some gene that causes this mutation or if there’s truly some magic in us.

I have never been the smartest of the clan. That job goes to Asher. I do what my alpha tells me to do, work during the day, and care for my nephew during the night. Before him, I used to care for my sister, even though she was thirty-five and full of whims.

A mate was never in the frontal lobe of my brain because I had faith. I knew she was out there, somewhere. Knew she’d eventually find her way to me. The one thing I didn’t expect was for her to be a human. I’m still not sure what to do about that. Not when she’s not staying, not when mating her might kill her. Not when she might die staying here.

I park in my usual spot and exit the car, slamming the door behind me. My heart still beats unevenly, and I feel like a teenager going out on my first date. I grab my backpack from the backseat and the two containers.

I shouldn’t have hope; she's not staying. But sometimes, the bear wins over. When I went to the restaurant to buy myself some dinner, I realized too late my bear made me buy two. He’s slowly finding ways to make me stay close to her.

I turn the doorknob and enter the house without thinking much. My gaze combs the ground around Owen. I’m being pathetic and avoiding looking at her is one easy way to put this mate thing in the back of my mind. But when I find Owen, he’s stumbling his way to her. The kid stands on his two legs, swaying from side to side, but his steps are sure as he giggles. I halt, eyes wide as I watch the scene.

Astrid holds her phone in hand, grinning at Owen as she stretches an arm. “Look, Kieran!” She cries out, beaming at me.

I lock eyes with her, and heat surges through my body. My heart melts beneath her gaze, and flames lick along my limbs, and I feel them singe the tips of my fingers. I take a sharp inhale. There’s no running from it, is there? I can’t keep her at arm’s length.

Give up, my bear tells me. He’s energized when close to her, and bears are usually more on the quiet side.

Owen stumbles another step and topples. Astrid reaches him before he hits the floor. She scoops him up and laughs, and I keep my eyes peeled open. The sight of her with the baby in her arms, and laughter on their faces, is too much for me. It calls out to every instinct in my body.

Mate.

I know, our mate. I don’t know how or why, but she’s our mate. Chosen by my bear. And she’s taking up my heart too. My gaze roams over her pretty features as she turns to me. Her smile is the most beautiful thing in the world. I’d give everything I own to see it more often.

“Did you see it?” She asks, skipping closer.

“I did.” I smile at her, and Owen stretches his little hands at me. He comes to my arms, and I press my nose to his temple. “Such a precocious kid.”

“I mean,” she chuckles, looking at her phone. “It was just two steps. But he walked!” She replays the film she just recorded. “He’s so cute. I can’t believe I was lucky enough to see that.”

My heart grows two sizes. This woman, she has no idea how easy it is to want her. She’s good. The goodness in her heart overflows and shines through her eyes. Someone hurt her, and she hasn’t told me about it just yet, but somehow, she still sees beauty in simple things.

Astrid cares for Owen with such love. She’s doing more than what was expected. And I can’t help but imagine her living here. Raising Owen and our kids with me. Sharing the rest of her life with mine.

I shake my head to shove these thoughts away. An arm raising, I show her the containers my bear made me buy. “Steak and fries. Interested?”

Astrid puts her phone away and runs a hand through her hair. The motion always captures me. “I don’t want to be a burden.”

“What?” I scoff. “You’re no burden. You’re fantastic.” Oops, that last word wasn’t supposed to come out. Good is a fine compliment, great is as well. But not fantastic. Fantastic is too much.

Her lips curl, and I change my mind. I’m glad I complimented her like that. But there’s something in her eyes as she studies me. “Would you like me to stay so you can have dinner? I can take care of Owen.” Our eyes lock, and I can see right through her. She’s trying to understand why I want her company. She can’t quite believe I just want her presence. Astrid has no idea how much I desire her. How much my body and my heart call for her. And I can’t tell her.

I put Owen down, and he immediately sets off to his toys. They take over half of the house. My feet take me closer to Astrid, and I raise a hand to brush my fingers across her cheek. The contact seems to break a boundary I had settled. My body is electric as if there’s a current arcing between us through the touch.

“Astrid,” I say her name under my breath. Like something sacred. Her eyes glitter, they shimmer beneath the artificial lights. “Have dinner with me.”

She swallows, and her cheeks gain a pretty pink color. I think she’s finally understood my meaning. She steps back and tucks a strand of hair behind an ear. “All right.”

Astrid sets the table as I search the fridge for something to drink. Asher has some fancy beers here, and I offer for us to take them. Astrid refuses, so I go with her. We have juice, and I don’t even care about what we eat. She has my entire focus. I can’t stop watching her. Even the way she chews is fascinating. I know how stupid that makes me sound.

“Tell me about your life before,” I say, and unlike the other times we chatted, she relaxes.

Astrid tells me of college and working as a manager throughout her life. She tells me about getting married, which makes me grip the fork so hard it actually breaks. Not my best moment.

Then she tells me about helping her husband raise his kid from the first marriage and how none of them cared about her as a human being. How she felt more like their maid than anything. And she tells me of finding her husband fucking the nanny and how she ran off as soon as she signed the divorce papers.

Unluckily, I’m sipping my juice just as she tells that part. My bear gets so mad I can’t keep him from gripping the glass too hard. It explodes in my hand.

Astrid jumps. “Oh, God!”

“Fuck...” I hiss, waving my hand to rid it of the juice. But it’s covered half of my shirt, and I have to thank my bear for this situation.

He still paces inside me, wondering how we can find her ex and kill him. The man would make a nice rug.

“Are you hurt?” Astrid comes closer, a napkin in hand.

I want her to touch me with it just so I can feel her hands on me. “I’m fine,” I tell her. My skin’s too thick to be cut by something so simple. “Don’t worry.”

She darts to the trash can and brings it closer. “Let me put this glass away so no one gets hurt.” Before she sweeps, she goes to Owen and puts him inside the playpen we have in the kitchen. It helps when I have to cook. It’s a wonder how fast she thinks of everything.

“Then I’ll change,” I get to my feet, feeling ridiculous. I can’t believe I couldn’t control a bout of rage so simple. This is taught to shifters when we’re kids. “Sorry about that.”

Before she can reply, I rush into the laundry room next door and tug the shirt off. I find a clean one to put on after I wipe the liquid off my torso.

Her steps sound closer, and I halt, shirt in hand. I don’t move a muscle as she enters the room, and her sweet scent hits me like a truck. I inhale her and hope I’ll never forget how she smells. It’s easy for shifters to remember the scent of their mates. And if we never get together, her scent will forever mark me. Her memory.

Her fingers brush my back. I tense beneath her touch but do my best not to show it. My cock pulses, hardening, begging for more of her. My bear is halfway to a breakdown, all from a touch.

“How did you get hurt?” She voices, so low it’s merely a whisper. Like she’s afraid to insult me.

My back is covered in small, thin scars I gained fighting other animals throughout my life. I even had some problems with our last alpha, Wyatt’s father. We've all fought wolves at some point. But I bet she’s asking about the one on my shoulder.

Even with my shifter healing, it’s not pretty. It might still take some time to become as thin as the others. The angry slashes were made when the bears of my sister’s clan invaded us. From what I’ve heard, they’re still around the territory, trying to get in. Whenever they want to fight, I’ll be ready.

I tilt my lips. “Fought a bear.” Not a lie.

She gasps in shock. “A bear?”

I nod. “Cornered me in the woods.”

Her hand leaves my skin. I’m immediately cold. Empty. “And you lived!”

I turn, facing her in the semi-darkness. The only light pours from the door into the kitchen. Her cheeks flare with a blush, and I bask in the way her eyes take my body in. She studies every angle of my torso, and her eyes brighten with a flare.

“That I did.” I smile. “I’m not that weak.”

“Oh, I would never think you’re weak,” she chuckles under her breath, and I can see her looking away, almost hoping I haven’t heard it.

Whatever this feeling is, this aching to belong to her, to touch her, I let it take over. Just once. Just for now. My hand comes up and cups her cheek. She’s smooth, soft like clouds. And she smells amazing. The tips of her hair tickle the back of my hand, and I watch her coming closer, inching nearer as if she feels this power too. Beautiful Astrid parts her lips, her eyes on my mouth. I take that as a sign and dive in to taste her. Our lips brush together, and every cell in me ignites. My bear roars, but I force him back. May the Great Bear forgive me if Astrid finds out what I am.

Astrid’s hands come around my waist as we kiss. Her fingers burn my skin, and I feel her touch everywhere. My fingers rope through her hair, and I tug on the roots and tilt her head back.

She lets me in, and our tongues touch halfway. It’s so much more than I expected. She’s sweet and addictive, and I drink from her mouth over and over, exploring, sucking on her plump lips, savoring her. A whimper escapes her mouth, and she presses her body to mine. I spread a hand on the small of her back and keep her against me. The hardness of my cock digs into her belly, but her response is not offended. Instead, she moves her hips slightly.

The smell of her arousal wafts up to my nose. I break the kiss and clench my jaw shut, burying my face in her neck and kissing her pulse.

It’s a lot to take in. Her beauty, the way she feels, how she tastes, her fragrance. She’s aroused. For me. My mouth waters and I want to rip her pants off and lick her cunt until she comes against my face. Until she’s ready and pliable for my taking. I’d put her on all fours, bent over my bed, and I’d fuck her until her womb was so full of my seed it dripped from within her. The thoughts grow heated as they pour through me. My grip tightens, and she whimpers again, her nails digging into my skin. I love the pain. I love it because it comes from her.

My bear roars deep inside me, and he tries to get closer. But I’m not mating her. I can’t mate her.

I pull back. Astrid’s hair is a mess, her face red, and her eyes veiled in lust. She looks up at me with awe, and I wonder if she sees something I don’t.

The moment I unwind my fingers from her hair, she pushes me off. Confused, I watch her haul herself up on the washing machine with detached curiosity.

What is she doing? My bear paces in near desperation inside me as I swallow, again and again, trying to recover some control. I need to put some distance between us. Need some fresh air. Astrid’s hands grip my neck, and she jerks me closer. My body fits between her legs, my hands finding her thighs. Her breasts hit my neck as she adjusts herself. I’m doomed. This woman has just sealed the deal.