The Blood That Binds by Madeline Sheehan
Willow
The first thing I’m aware of is pain.
So. Much. Fucking. Pain.
Pulsating, throbbing pain that brought tears to my eyes. As I struggled to lift my hand, to move muscles that didn’t seem to want to cooperate, a gasp lodged in my throat, burning its way through my next breath. I felt like lead, like dead swollen weight set aflame.
“Hey there, honey,” an unfamiliar voice called out. “Everything’s okay. Just lay back—lay still. I’ll get you something for the pain, alright?”
Jerking in surprise, I fought to open my crust-covered eyes, frantic to understand what was happening—why I was in so much pain, why I couldn’t move, and who was speaking to me. As my eyes peeled painfully open, and I blinked through the glaring light above, an unknown face hovered in and out of focus.
“Who…” I croaked. “Where…”
Dark eyes crinkled at the corners. “You’re safe, honey, no one’s gonna hurt you here.” The no-nonsense voice turned soft and soothing. “No need to fret. Now I’m going to get you something for the pain—you just hold tight.”
I felt a cold rush up my arm, followed quickly by a hot flush, heat that began in my arm and spread quickly through my entire body. The pain in my leg faded as my thoughts muddled.
“There we go,” the voice said. “Now you just rest, alright? I’m going to go get that good-looking young man of yours.”
Luke? A wave of relief washed over me even as my stomach flipped.
It came back to me slowly, a trickle of memories that quickly turned into an avalanche. Events flashed out of order: Lucas and I dancing in the rain. Logan yelling at me, demanding that I drink something. Lucas and I running through the woods, laughing. Lucas presenting me with breakfast in bed, flowers caught between his teeth. Lucas grinning at me just before dropping out of sight.
Tears formed and fell, streaking hot tracks down my cheeks. Every breath felt like fire in my lungs. All these years together, fighting to stay alive, and for what? It was all for nothing. Lucas was gone and I was…
I was in hell.
“Willow?” A faraway voice tugged at me, deep and gruff and distinct. Prying my heavy eyelids open again, I found Logan looming over me, his eyes bloodshot and ringed with bruising, his skin smudged with dirt. His hair was a mess—stringy and greasy, with large clumps that had been pulled from his bun, left sticking up in all different directions.
“You’re awake,” Logan rasped. “Jesus Christ, you’re actually fucking awake.”
The unfamiliar face stood opposite Logan, lifting my arm, wrapping something around it. A blood pressure cuff, I realized, as it tightened uncomfortably. I looked at Logan, still not quite understanding what was happening.
“She’s a doctor,” he explained, swallowing thickly. “We’re in a camp… there’s people here…”
“You can call me Doc—everyone else does,” the voice said. “Now how’s that pain? Has it lessened some?”
Keeping my eyes on Logan, I nodded jerkily.
“Now, you’re not out of the woods yet,” the voice continued. “You’ve been pretty out of it for the last few days, but your fever has finally broken and some of the swelling in your leg has gone down. Even your color is looking better. Vitals are good…” the voice trailed off as something cool was placed on my chest. “Take a deep breath for me, honey. Good, good. Yes, I’d say everything is looking as good as can be expected right now.”
“Where… are we?” I attempted to ask, the words barely audible.
“You’re at Silver Lake, honey,” the voice replied, sounding farther away than it had just seconds ago. “Let me be the first to officially welcome you.” Footsteps echoed all around and the unfamiliar face reappeared. “Help her drink this, Logan—just a few sips, mind you.”
“It’s a camp,” Logan muttered as he helped to lift my head. “They’ve got walls and running water and electricity.” Cool water dripped into my mouth and my lips parted, feeling suddenly parched. Though as the first drops trickled past my throat, I began to cough, sputtering and heaving, until I could breathe again.
“That’s enough for now,” the unfamiliar voice chastised. “She can try again later.”
“So you’ve found it,” I rasped once I’d stopped coughing. “Your perfect place…”
We stared at one another, Logan’s red-rimmed eyes boring into mine, until my eyelids began to droop, and Logan’s pained expression slipped away into darkness.
I awoke with a start, pain and panic forcing me upright even as my body resisted the movement. Falling back against the bed with a groan, I gritted my teeth, tears blurring my vision, breathing sharply against the throbbing pain. Once I could see through my tears, I glanced around the dim room, startled to find Logan sleeping upright in a chair beside my bed.
His arms folded over his chest, his head was bent back against the wall, his eyes closed as his chest rhythmically rose and fell. Even in sleep, he scowled, and every so often he would twitch and shift, clearly uncomfortable and sleeping fitfully. Noticeably wet, his blond hair was pulled into a loose ball on top of his head, several strands hanging free and dripping water onto the clean white T-shirt he was wearing. A vague memory niggled my thoughts—the unfamiliar voice demanding that Logan take a shower.
I continued watching him sleep, soon recalling more events with better clarity. Despite me fighting him every step of the way, Logan had managed to do exactly what he’d always promised he’d do—he’d found us a safe haven. And Lucas, the very best of us, the kindest soul I’d ever known, would never get to see it.
Pain sliced through my chest, making breathing difficult once more. Why hadn’t Logan left me in that ravine? Lucas was gone, and it was all my fault, and yet… here I was. Logan had saved me… why?
Still staring at Logan, tears filling my eyes, I rasped, “You should have just let me die.”