The Betrayal by Shayla Black

Fourteen months later

November 7

Thick clouds rolled across the cold November sky, matching Hammer’s dark mood. The bitter wind lashed his face as he stared at the familiar gravestone in somber silence. As always, his Irish pal Liam O’Neill stood beside him, offering his steady support through this annual vigil of contrition. But Hammer could never really atone; he knew that.

“The flowers you brought are lovely,” Liam offered. “She would have liked them.”

Probably. Sometimes, it felt as if she’d left a lifetime ago. And sometimes, it seemed like yesterday.

Hammer nodded at his best friend because he didn’t know what else to say. He hated thinking about her loss. He hated talking about it even more.

It also sucked that he and Liam only saw each other once a year now, when Hammer flew back east so they could share a few grim smiles and bittersweet recollections during this terrible ritual.

They’d been inseparable back in the day, solid through the best and the worst of life. Then time, circumstance, and some really regrettable decisions had changed everything. Still, despite the distance between them, he loved the bastard like a brother.

Liam turned to him. “Did I tell you I brought flowers for her birthday?”

“You did.”

“That day was sunny with a tease of spring in the air. She would have been pleased.”

Hammer nodded. “She never liked winter.”

“No.” Liam didn’t offer another comment, like he was at a loss for words, too.

The silence stretched on. Macen hoped they had finished dutifully paying homage—at least for another year—to a past that could never be undone. After all, nothing could purge the remorse staining Hammer’s soul. Did Liam feel the same? Hammer didn’t know. They’d never talked about the end.

Instead, he had escaped to the opposite coast, moving from New York to Los Angeles. After that, things had never been the same. Today especially he missed the unguarded camaraderie they’d once shared.

In the old days, he would have confessed to Liam that his mind wasn’t here at the cemetery but preoccupied by his desperate desire for Raine. In the last year, she’d gone from being the too-young runaway he’d taken in because she tugged on his heartstrings to the budding siren who had tied him up in agonizing knots of lust.

But he said nothing. In fact, he’d never mentioned the girl to his best friend.

It was on the tip of his tongue to ask for Liam’s advice on coping with this potent need for the girl-woman living under his roof. He remained mute. He didn’t want to share her even verbally. Besides, too much water had washed under their bridge for such soul baring.

Not to mention the fact that O’Neill had his own problems—big ones.

Hammer had kept his opinion of Liam’s fiancée to himself. Not his igloo, not his ice queen. And if he delved into Liam’s problems, his old pal would only do what he did best: deflect the questions and dissect Hammer instead.

Macen wanted to avoid that at all costs.

He clapped Liam on the back. “Ready to go?”

“If you are.”

Hammer merely nodded.

Wordlessly, they plodded across the frozen ground. Usually, Hammer looked forward to this part of their observance, when his Irish friend stayed true to his roots and took him to some pub where they’d imbibe a pint—or ten—and forget…at least for a while. This year, he wished he could skip it and fly home.

Was Raine all right? Did she miss him, too? Were the club members obeying his rules?

He’d left Pike, a trusted dungeon monitor, in charge of Raine’s well-being. If any Dom so much as breathed in her scent, Pike would not only carry out Hammer’s strict, hands-off, castrate-any-bastard-who-touched-her policy, he would revel in it. But that wasn’t fucking enough, and not knowing how she was doing was turning him inside out.

God, he hated how much he ached to see her right now.

“So, where are we getting shitfaced this year?”

Liam smirked. “As long as the drinks are stout and we get bloody pissed, does it matter?”

“Not really.”

“Then I’ll call for a ride and find us a friendly pub.”

Hammer nodded. Since he couldn’t skip this drunkfest, he might as well enjoy it. “How’s Seth?”

Liam focused on his phone. “As you can imagine, our friend Mr. Cooper is busy, but when we have time for a chat, he seems good, if a bit more of a homebody these days.”

At least someone is happy. But Hammer didn’t say that; he’d only sound as bitter as he felt. “Glad to hear it.”

“I’m hoping to join him soon.” Liam pocketed his phone. “Uber is on its way.”

Another pause. Another awkward silence.

Hammer grimaced. He really didn’t want to delve into Liam’s mess, but what kind of friend would he be if he didn’t try? “So…marriage, huh? Are you really sure you want to take the plunge?”

“Oh, aye. I am.”

“You’ve thought about all the things you’ll be giving up, right? You’ve always liked…variety.”

“Not anymore. She’s perfect for me, mate.”

Hammer didn’t see it. In fact, he’d bet Liam had merely fallen prey to Gwyneth’s pretty face and lithe body. “What about the lifestyle? You’re a Dominant. Submission is not her thing, man.”

“There’s a hungry sub inside her, and I’ll find it.”

Hammer raised a brow at his friend. If that crazy bitch was any sort of submissive, then he was a fucking virgin.

“Don’t look at me that way,” Liam protested. “With a little time and effort, I know I can coax Gwyneth’s deepest desires.”

Maybe her deepest desires for Gucci and Vuitton, but cuffs and spanking benches? “From one Dom to another, I’ve seen no hint of a submissive lurking inside that”—catty, calculating, conniving—“woman.”

“If you spent more time with her, you’d see her potential.”

At Liam’s earnest tone, Hammer somehow managed not to roll his eyes. It had only taken him an evening with the couple to know that Liam’s future wife wasn’t what his friend needed.

“Why don’t you stay a few more days, Macen, get to know her a bit better? We can have dinner tomorrow night at that little Italian place you like over on Mulberry Street…then see where the night takes us.”

Hammer knew what that meant and couldn’t shake his head fast enough. “I can’t. Sorry.”

Bailing made him feel more than a little guilty. Sure, he’d like to save Liam from making the biggest mistake of his life. But the man was too blinded by lust to hear that Gwyneth was a straight-up narcissist, incapable of loving anyone but herself. Instead, Hammer stayed tight-lipped. That conversation was a fistfight in the making, and he was hesitant to say anything that might drive a bigger wedge between them.

Liam’s mouth pressed into a glum line. “I understand. I’ve the feeling you’re eager to get home to something. Or someone. What aren’t you telling me?”

A fucking shit ton. But how could he explain to Liam an obsession he didn’t understand himself?

Fifteen months ago, when he’d found Raine hiding in the alley behind his club, he’d taken one look at her, seen the fear and defeat in her pretty blue eyes, and felt a fist squeeze his heart. He’d had no idea how long she’d been living on the streets, but some asshole had obviously used her as a punching bag, and he’d felt an undeniable urge to save the terrified waif.

At first, she’d been skittish, unsure if she could trust him. She’d masked her fear behind bravado and sarcasm, but Hammer hadn’t been fooled. Instead, he’d done his best to be patient, gentle, and coaxing. Slowly, it had worked.

Then all too soon his concern had become…more. At first, he’d dismissed the pull he felt as mere need to protect her. After all, without him, she was a child alone in the world. But as the months passed, she’d begun to blossom, no longer bruised, scrawny, or skittish. Maturity and confidence had turned Raine from a striking stray to an alluring woman.

Now she was eighteen. Since her birthday, he’d been exercising his considerable restraint and existing on cold showers. No matter how many times he reminded himself that he was thirty and had no business wanting her, the fact that she now was legal taunted and tempted him every fucking day. Her skimpy outfits and flirtatious smiles only threw kindling on his blaze. Still, she was too damn innocent to be subjected to his Dominant desire to drag her beneath him, lay his mouth over hers, slide slow and deep into her virgin pussy, and claim her for his own.

How the fuck could he want to save and defile the girl at once?

God help them if he ever gave in. He’d unleash the gnawing beast inside him, and it would destroy them both.

Sure, he knew prettier women, more sophisticated and educated ones. Hell, he had sex with them, willing himself to be satisfied with her substitutes. But none had Raine’s intriguing mix of sharp wit, fragile soul, and wide-open heart.

He had no idea what to do.

Finally, Hammer turned to his best friend and lied without even blinking. “Nothing.”

Liam frowned. “Are you sure? You seem distracted.”

Time to change the subject.

“Hey, since I can’t stay, why don’t you visit LA? Call it an early bachelor party. What kind of best man would I be if I didn’t give you a big send-off?” If he could persuade Liam to come out west, maybe he could introduce his friend to some soft, lovely subs who might change his mind about marrying that soul-sucking shrew. “There are tons of things to see and do. We could spend a few days checking out Disney, Malibu, Hollywood… I know dozens of amazing restaurants and nightclubs.”

Liam had never taken him up on his invitations to visit in the past. Hammer couldn’t think of a single reason he’d change his mind now. On the other hand, if Liam came to Shadows, Hammer would have to explain Raine. It was probably goddamn selfish, but he hoped Liam refused again. He didn’t want his old pal anywhere near her.

“A bachelor party sounds fantastic, mate. I know you’d throw me a legendary bash. But you’re coming a few days before the wedding in April, right? We can do it then. I just don’t want to leave my girl now. I hope you understand.”

Unfortunately, he did.

“Sure,” he said as they hopped in the arriving Uber and headed to a pub.

The rest of the night was a blessed blur, and despite the cabin pressure of the plane playing hell with his hangover the next morning, Hammer was all too happy to be winging his way back to LA.

By late afternoon, Macen strode through the doors of Shadows. A million and one tasks no doubt awaited his attention, but for the first time in years, he wasn’t drained and looking to drown himself in tequila after paying his annual penance in New York. All he wanted was Raine.

Striding through the dungeon, he scanned the room, itching to lay eyes on her. Three days away from her was two and a half too many.

He skimmed a cursory glance over the members, his heart beating a little too fast with anticipation. It wasn’t as if she would run toward him and leap into his arms like some romantic movie. They wouldn’t even touch. Their reunion would be nothing more than a few cordial words and a smile.

Safe.

Chaste.

Empty.

With an inward curse, he shoved down his rising desire and reminded himself that, when it came to Raine, he had three simple rules: Keep your hands to yourself. Keep your dick in your pants. See rules one and two.

He took a slower pass over the dungeon but still didn’t spot Raine. Then he caught a whiff of cinnamon and apples mingling with the usual scents of leather and sex in the air. A smile tugged at his lips. Of course. She had known he was coming home today. The little vixen was busy in the kitchen whipping up a batch of his favorite apple spice muffins. He turned and headed her direction.

He’d only taken a couple of steps before the hair on the back of his neck stood on end. The stares of the club members pricked like needles. He’d been so focused on finding Raine, he’d missed the anxious undercurrent humming around him.

Something was wrong.

He tossed a glance over his shoulder, seeking the source of his disquiet. No one would meet his gaze except Kenneth Beckman, Shadows’ most enthusiastic sadist and one of his good friends.

When he caught sight of Beck’s grim expression, Hammer stilled. Alarm bells rang in his head.

Beck glanced toward the kitchen, and Hammer turned his gaze to follow. Raine stood in the portal, her long, inky tresses framing her delicate face. She met his stare for a moment. Guilt glimmered in her blue eyes. She quickly jerked away, turning her back on him.

No smile. No welcome. No unpracticed flirtation.

Apprehension burned through him. What the fuck had happened?

Raine usually wore her feelings for him on her sleeve. Now she barely looked at him. And the spitfire he had left three days ago? Long gone.

She disappeared into the kitchen, leaving Hammer frowning at an empty doorway while a million unanswered questions rolled through his brain. Before he could chase her down and interrogate her, Beck stepped into his path.

“We need to talk,” his burly, tattooed friend muttered in a low, grave tone. “And no, it can’t wait.”

Annoyed, Hammer craned around Beck to look at Raine. He scowled at the wilted line of her spine. That worried the hell out of him.

“I’m listening.”

Beck shook his head. “Not here, dumb ass.”

That made Hammer zip his gaze back around. Yeah, it was serious. “My office. Let’s make it quick.”

Without another word, the two strode down the hall to Macen’s private quarters. After closing the door behind them, he pinned Beck with an impatient glower. “What?”

Scrubbing a hand through his dark hair, his friend exhaled heavily. “I have to tell you something because nobody else will. But before I do, you have to promise you won’t lose your shit.”

“Spill it before I beat the fuck out of you.”

“You’d die trying,” Beck quipped. “It’s about Raine.”

Macen had guessed that, but his stomach pitched when Beck confirmed his suspicion. Somehow he managed a blank expression. “Go on.”

“While you were gone, she and Zak got together.”

Hammer froze, a dozen images assaulting his brain that all made him want to commit murder. “Got together…how?”

“C’mon, do I really have to explain how to insert tab A into slot B? They had sex.”

Hammer rocked back on his heels as if he’d been sucker-punched. As the words rolled through his brain, rage, hot and atomic, exploded inside him. She’d given that motherfucker her virginity?

Hammer should have known by Zak’s leering glances that the prick would try to slide under his radar and get to Raine one day. Now Macen wished like hell that he hadn’t gone to New York. But he owed the dead the respect he hadn’t given her in life.

Damn it.

“Where is he?” Hammer pounded his fist on his desk. “I’m going to kill him.”

Beck sighed. “This is why no one wanted to tell you. You have to calm down.”

“I don’t have to do anything except murder that fucking bastard.”

“Stop being so dramatic. As much as I’d enjoy cheering you on because no asshat is more deserving, you can’t do that. Besides, you’d look shitty in orange.”

“I’ll settle for castrating him. Slowly. With a dull, rusty knife.”

Beck sighed again. “I get it. Zak fucked your woman but—”

“She’s not mine. I’m just protecting her from shitbags like him.”

“Oh, please… Anyone with eyes knows she’s yours. But you refused to grow a pair and fuck her yourself so—”

“Shut up,” Hammer barked because Beck didn’t understand. “Where is Pike? He was supposed to be keeping an eye on her.”

“Home with the flu. I offered to fill in for him, but last night I had my hands full.”

“Full of what, tits and pussy?” Rage pressed in on Hammer until he thought his head might explode.

Beck scowled and clenched his fists. Good. Hammer was ready for a fight.

“I had to break up a brawl in the parking lot before the cops showed. By the time I mopped that up, Zak had culled the princess from the herd. But Raine is legally allowed to make decisions about her body and sexuality.”

“Until you slipped up, she didn’t have any sexuality! Are you a hundred percent sure that she and Zak...” Hammer couldn’t bring himself to finish that sentence.

“Well, I caught them leaving a private room together. Zak was zipping his pants, and Raine looked shell-shocked.”

The mental image from those words pelted Hammer’s brain. He didn’t want to believe it. “That doesn’t mean they had sex.”

Beck gritted his teeth as if digging for patience. “I confronted Zak later. He admitted they had. I reminded him that Raine is totally off-limits. His exact reply was, ‘I guess she didn’t want to be Hammer’s little virgin anymore.’”

Instant, violent fury shot through Macen. He suppressed the urge to ram his fist into a wall—barely. If Raine had meant to punish him for not accepting her subtle sexual invitations, it had fucking worked.

“So…” Beck went on. “When I found Raine crying in the kitchen, I figured the asshole wasn’t lying.”

“Crying?” Bile rose in the back of Hammer’s throat as another possibility occurred to him. “Did he force her?”

“Would I have let him live? Look, as much as I loathe that cocksucker, I don’t think he’s a rapist.”

“But you don’t know that.”

“C’mon… Think about it. Zak likes the chase. Seduction is a game for him.”

True. So that son of a bitch had used his forked, silver tongue to talk Raine out of her panties. “I’m going to kill him.”

“Why do you seem surprised? He’s been working Raine for months. And he gave her the one thing she craved—the one thing you’ve refused to: a man’s desire. In your absence, he finally had the chance to wear her down.”

Hammer wanted to rip the door off its hinges, race to the dungeon, and wipe the floor with Zak. No, he hadn’t expected Raine to stay a virgin forever…but damn it, he’d ached to be her first—more than he wanted to admit.

Now he’d never have that chance, though that was probably for the best. He was the last man she should ever give her innocence to.

Hammer frowned. “Did you talk to her about it?”

“Every time she sees me, she backs up ten feet, so no.”

“Which means you don’t know anything for sure?”

“Dude… They fucked. Accept it.”

He glared at Beck, a heartbeat from tearing everything in his office apart with his bare hands, the man included.

His friend’s voice softened. “Sorry. You’ve had your balls in a twist for months. You want her, and she sure as hell hasn’t hidden how much she wants you. Why didn’t you man up once she turned legal? What did you think would happen if you kept treating your woman like a child?”

Hammer had sworn to himself that he’d gladly release Raine to the man who put her on a pedestal and made her his queen. Someday. Years in the future. At the very least, he’d expected her to bestow her virginity on someone who would value the gift, not a player who treated women like a trophy in a competitive sport.

He rounded his desk, dropped into his chair, and scrubbed a hand over his face. “Where is that weasel-dicked son of a bitch?”

“You can’t go out there and confront him.”

“The fuck I can’t. This is my club. He broke my number one rule.”

“I meant that Raine probably needs you more than Zak needs his ass kicked. I think she’s beating herself up.”

“But that rat fucking bastard seduced her when he knew damn well—” Hammer bit back the rest. “Zak is a dead man.”

“And if you’re locked up in prison, how are you going to protect Raine from the next guy who seduces her out of her panties?” Beck pointed out. “Look, the damage is done. All you can do now is tear up his contract and escort him off the property. But don’t go out there half-cocked, because I’m not posting your bail for murder.”

“I didn’t ask you to.”

“But someone needed to remind you, and I drew the short straw today. Ever heard the phrase don’t shoot the messenger?”

Beck was right.

Hammer sighed. “Thanks for having the balls to tell me what happened.”

“Sorry, man. I know it hurts.” Beck clapped him on the back in sympathy. “So what will you do to Raine?”

Hammer’s scowl deepened. “Do to her?”

“You know, are you finally going to change things between you? Or are you going to keep setting her on a shelf like some goddamn doll?”

“She can’t handle me.”

“So you’re not even going to try? You’re just going to keep wasting your time with all the other subs? Everyone, even Raine, knows what you do with them. Hammer away at ’em, right? If you’re this pissed off about another man laying his hands on your precious, but you’re not willing to take a hard look at your choices, I can’t help you.”

“I didn’t ask you to, so fuck off.”

Beck shook his head as if he’d tried, but Hammer was hopeless.

Once the sadist had gone, he stood and paced. Looking for calm was pointless. Whatever his fuckups in this situation had been, they didn’t mitigate Zak’s sins. Those couldn’t go unpunished.

Wrenching open his office door, he stormed down the hall and into the dungeon. Across the room, Zak was halfheartedly flogging a sub. Hammer suspected the manwhore had joined Shadows not to engage in the power exchange but to tag as much pussy as possible.

As he strode Zak’s way, Hammer barely resisted the urge to wrench the flogger from the asshole’s grip and beat him. Instead, he crossed his arms over his chest. “Let’s talk. Outside.”

“I’m busy,” Zak pointed out with a wave of his hand. “You can wait.”

Hammer clenched his jaw. “Now.”

Without waiting for Zak’s reply, he released the carabiner hooks from the sub’s cuffs, snatched up a blanket, and wrapped it around the girl before leading her to a couch where several other subs sat.

“Take care of her, please,” Hammer instructed the girls, ignoring Zak’s protests.

“Yes, Sir,” one murmured.

As soon as she was settled, he grabbed the cocksucker by the arm and hauled him to the back door.

“What the fuck?” Zak growled. “Why are you embarrassing me in front of that sub?”

“You broke my rules.” Hammer dragged him into the alley, shoved him against the dumpster, then lunged until they stood nose to nose.

The rat bastard smirked. “Oh, so this is about Raine? Before you bust my balls, you should know she wanted it. Give your overbearing daddy complex a rest.”

Zak hadn’t begun to see his daddy complex in action. “Shut the fuck up or you won’t like what happens next.”

“You plan on taking a swing at me, old man?” Zak taunted.

“No.” One swing would never be enough.

“Look, it just happened. We were talking, you know? Then one thing led to another, and we fucked.” He shrugged. “It was no big deal.”

Zak was wrong.

Hammer’s hands curled into fists. “Shut up.”

“C’mon, man. She—”

“I said shut up.”

“I only plucked what was ripe for the taking. Since you weren’t going to plow that field, you had to know someone was going to run his tool through her soil. Why not me?”

Hammer’s control ripped off its chain. Zak had just dug his own grave.

“She was strictly off-limits.”

“Why?” Zak cocked his head. “Oh, because you wanted to be the first inside that tight, juicy piece of virgin pussy, isn’t that right, daddy? You’re jealous I beat you to it.”

In a fiery red haze, Hammer threw a brutal right hook to Zak’s jaw.

The asshole flailed back, landing with a thud on the ground, howling like a bitch. “Jesus!”

Macen was done talking. He leapt on top of Zak and wrapped his fist in the shitbag’s shirt, then punched him again. Then again. And again, until his knuckles throbbed and blood slicked them as it spewed from Zak’s mouth and broken nose. Until the prick did nothing but cower and whine.

Hammer only stopped when he felt another hand clamp down on his shoulder. “That’s enough.”

Beck. The man’s familiar voice barely penetrated his rage.

“Go away.”

“You can’t kill him.”

Oh, but he fucking wanted to.

“I’m saving you from yourself.” Beck tightened his fingers on his arm. “Let him go, Macen.”

It took every ounce of his restraint to unclench his fist and stand over Zak’s prone body. Breathing harsh, he glared at the douchebag. “If you ever try to see or talk to Raine again, I will finish what I started. I’ll smile as I cut off that cock you’re so proud of and shove it down your throat. Then I’ll bury your body where no one will ever find you. Do I make myself perfectly clear?”

Zak tried to scowl. “You threatened and assaulted me. I’m calling the cops.”

“I dare you. Won’t they be interested to hear that you had sex with one of your little sister’s friends a few weeks ago. What was she, barely sixteen?”

Zak reared back in shock. “How did you—”

“Know? I have ways. Don’t fuck with me. Or I’ll hunt you down and make you wish I’d killed you today. You got it?”

Zak nodded, whimpering as he rose slowly, then limped down the alley.

Beside him, Beck sighed.

Reluctantly, Hammer turned the sadist’s way. “I’m fine. You can go in now.”

“No, you need a few minutes to cool off before you talk to Raine. She needs you.”

Yeah? How was he supposed to talk to her without losing his shit?

As Beck turned away, Hammer plopped onto the cement steps by the back door, wiping the crimson dripping from his knuckles on his bloodstained shirt.

The dumpster beside him caught his attention. He could still feel the heat of that August night he’d taken Raine in pressing all around him. She’d been huddled here, hiding and hoping no one found her. After he’d cut through her wall of defiance and reached the fragile, shivering girl behind it, he’d known she was in trouble and that no one else would help. So he’d offered Raine a safe haven, figuring that, one day, she would spread her wings and fly. For the first time, Hammer was forced to consider what he would do when that day came. He could no longer imagine his world without her.

“I’m fucked,” he said to his retreating friend. “Aren’t I?”

Beck hesitated. “Admitting it is the first step.”

Then the door slammed, and Hammer was alone with his heaping regret.

When had everything gone wrong? After he’d first taken Raine in, he’d done everything he could to gain her trust. Eventually, they’d settled into a harmonious if odd coexistence. It had been all right.

Then…she’d turned eighteen.

He’d given her a surprise party because he’d wanted to make her happy. His fatal mistake.

Under the guise of taking her to dinner, he had sent her shopping with his credit card and told her to buy something pretty. When she’d returned, bags in hand, he’d urged her to get dressed while the guests secretly arrived. When he went to retrieve her for their “reservations,” Raine had opened the door in a candy-apple-red minidress that clung to her every curve, accentuated her plump breasts, and ended with a slit at her lush hip. The sight had punched Hammer in the gut.

He could no longer deny that she’d become a woman. Or that he’d been fighting his desire for more than a while.

But the worst had been her blue eyes shining with hero worship and a plea for his approval. No avoiding the fact she ached for him to want her. To love her.

He’d been so fucking tempted to give in.

And he’d been a tortured bastard ever since.

Not much had changed…until today.

Standing, Macen exhaled with a heavy sigh. He needed a shower and to ditch his blood-splattered clothes. Then—somehow—he had to have a calm discussion with Raine, despite the thousand-pound weight that lay on his heart.

After a hot shower and a self-pep talk, Hammer pushed down his feelings as he trudged down the hall toward the kitchen. He stood in the doorway, watching Raine stir batter in a bowl. She swayed with each stroke of the spoon, and he couldn’t not look at her pert ass…the one Zak had probably cupped in his hands as he’d tunneled inside her. Hammer closed his eyes and counted to ten, silently chiding himself for reigniting his temper.

“It smells delicious as always, precious,” he called out to her.

Raine jumped and dropped the metal bowl on the counter with a little yelp. “Macen.”

Her breathless tone rolled over him. Was that the same tone she’d cried out with when Zak had shoved his dick through her hymen? He gritted his teeth.

She put a hand to her chest. “You scared me to death.”

“Sorry. Are you all right?”

“Fine.” She didn’t meet his gaze. “Did you have a good trip?”

“The usual. I’d rather not talk about it.”

“You didn’t want to last time, either.” She anchored a hand on her hip. “Why do you go every year?”

“That’s not what we need to talk about, and you know it.”

“Don’t,” she implored. “You just got home. Why don’t you sit and relax? You can pilfer some of my goodies while I slide in another batch.”

When she gestured nervously to the batter, Hammer raised a brow. “Rumor has it, Zak already pilfered your goodies.”

He struggled to keep the savagery from his tone.

Raine tensed. Guilt crawled across her face. But in typical Raine style, the defiant minx banked her expression and lifted her chin to meet him head on.

“It doesn’t matter.”

“It should.”

“It’s my body to give away and he wanted it.” She gave him a meaningless shrug he didn’t believe.

“When I first took you in, I told you all the men here, especially the Doms, were off-limits, remember?”

“I was a minor then, Macen. I’m an adult now. Maybe you hadn’t noticed.”

How could he not? She had all the trappings of womanhood—a saucy attitude and curves for days—yet in so many ways she was still a girl. “Legally, yes. But were you really ready for what happened?”

“It’s done. I’m fine,” she insisted.

He saw right through her. The slump of her shoulders and the way she hugged herself said she regretted it like hell.

“What made you choose Zak? Or did you give it any thought at all?” he snapped, then wished he hadn’t.

She bristled, and he realized that he’d hit a nerve. A selfish part of him wanted Raine to suffer right alongside him. But her haunted eyes told him she already was. If he chastised her again, she would only put distance between them. That was probably for the best…but it would kill him.

He stifled the urge to bring her closer. No, to strip her naked, run his tongue over every inch of her satiny flesh, and show her in no uncertain terms that she was his. But he couldn’t. He’d only hurt her more because Hammer knew that, unlike Zak, he had the power to crush her. And he’d already abused a woman’s trust once. He lived with the scars of that tragedy every day.

“Someone wanted me, Macen.” She sounded tired suddenly. “Someone attractive who made me laugh. He thought I was pretty. I thought he was hot.” She waved him away. “It doesn’t even matter. I don’t grill you about all the women you fuck. Take your muffins and leave.”

Damn. She’d scored a direct hit.

“Did he hurt you?”

His concerned whisper disarmed her, and tears filled Raine’s eyes. “No.”

“Did he wear a condom?”

“Yes.” She barely managed to get the word out as she dropped her head. Tears dripped to the floor. Seeing her so broken tore his heart in two.

Without a word, Hammer pulled her to his chest, then wrapped her in his arms. Raine melted into him and fell completely apart.

Swallowing his eviscerating regret, he focused on what she needed. Sighing, he closed his eyes and rested his chin on the top of her head, holding her close.

“Shh, don’t cry, precious. It’s all right.” He dropped a chaste kiss on her forehead.

It would be…but things had changed between them irrevocably. The knowledge that she was no longer an innocent to be sheltered at all costs lay between them. Hammer had to keep reminding himself that her lack of virginity didn’t make a fucking difference. She still wasn’t ready to handle his needs.

After several solemn minutes, Raine inched back, eyes swollen, cheeks mottled. “I’m sorry. I got your shirt wet.”

“It’s nothing,” Hammer assured. Cupping her chin, he forced her gaze to his. “Why don’t you go back to your room and take a nice, long bath?”

“I need to slide in this last batch of muffins for you,” she whispered, as if unsure her peace offering was enough.

“I’ll take care of them.”

“You? Cook?” She tried to laugh but choked on a residual sob.

Hammer flashed her a mock scowl. As their gentle teasing warmed his heart, she sent him a watery smile. Relief slithered through him. Whatever happened next, she was the same Raine. Now he had to suck up the disappointment that she’d given Zak what he’d wanted so badly.

After she slid the muffins in the oven and set the timer, Hammer promised he would remove them once they finished baking.

“You’re sure you got this?” She set the fire extinguisher on the counter. “I’m leaving this here. You know, just in case.”

“Get out of here. Go take your bath.”

As Raine exited, Hammer rolled the tension from his shoulders. Glaring at the clock, he mentally counted off the minutes until he could extract the muffins, lock himself inside his office, and drown his disappointment in a bottle of Patrón. Sure, that would get him through tonight. But what would happen when she tempted him again? Worse, how would he survive if she ever truly fell in love with someone else?