Broken Ex-Bully by Victoria Pinder

3

Chloe

The moon was bright and big as we walked the boardwalk next to the empty beach. Earlier, when I’d ducked out of the meet and greet, I’d dipped into the ocean. The water had been warm as it lapped against my body. The air had smelled salty.

Walking next to Renzo sent waves of pleasure and doubt through me. I half waited for him to transform into my childhood bully again. The other half of me ached to discover what his lips on mine might feel like.

My stomach was in knots, so we stayed silent on the walk around the property. I finally broke and said, “The beach is nice.”

He glanced at the moon and then at my side. “It is.”

I sucked on my bottom lip. I wanted him more than anyone else ever. Maybe I wanted to know what I’d missed or if I believed him or maybe whether the song running through my head and encouraging me to judge a man based on his kiss might be right. Tense, I said, “Smells better than the hospital.”

He pressed his hand to my lower back, and sparks rushed through me. Just as I started to accept that I was safe, he said, “I can imagine.” As we walked on, I could feel the tightness in his frame and energy bounding toward me from his strong body. “Listen, I’m really sorry that I was an ass to you. I’ve thought about the things I did so many times since then. The day you fell and I laughed and pointed at your face…” He turned to look away from me. “That day haunts me. I don’t know how I can make it up to you.”

Damn.My stomach tightened, and for a second, I couldn’t breathe. Then I sighed. “That was when I decided to not even try for state school and instead spend my savings on getting healthy.”

He slowed down. “Is that what happened?”

I’d planned to use my money for college, but after that day in the cafeteria, nothing else mattered except not being fat anymore. I used my savings for fat camp and nursing school. It was only a two-year degree, and the classes were less expensive than at a state school.

I said, “I flew to Arizona the day after graduation and spent the summer in fat camp, as it was thousands of dollars cheaper there than in California. Then I lived at home, finishing my associate’s at a community college, and started working.”

He put his hands in his back pockets as we passed an older couple who looked like they were comfortable with each other. “You’re quite a woman, Chloe.”

“I’m a hard worker. That doesn’t leave much time for fun.” I wished he would touch me again, so I held out my hand to hold as an offering. He took it, and for a second, all I heard was the waves splashing on the shore. “I almost didn’t come to Hawaii because I knew you’d be here.”

His face tightened, but he nodded. “I’m not the same person now that I moved out of my parents’ house and started doing my own things.”

I let him go and hugged my waist. It was time to thrash this out. My heart pounded. “You grew a heart, then?”

He massaged the back of his head. “No, but I realized their opinions were wrong. We can be with whoever we want, and a woman’s not supposed to just be arm candy.”

He’d gotten terrible advice, but it was typical of many of the kids at our school. I lowered my arms. “Your father told you that?”

He gently bumped into me. “My mother.”

I took his hand again, though I wanted more from him. “That’s horrible.”

He let out a breath. “I knew she wouldn’t approve of you, and I let that guide me. But that’s not an excuse for tossing a cheeseburger at you. And I don’t want to be like them.”

My eyes widened, and as I glanced at him, I wondered again what kissing him might be like. My cheeks heated at the thought. “That was my first memory of you.”

We headed into the palm tree area of the resort path, and he said, “I wanted to sit with you and eat. I was only thirteen, and I don’t remember a woman turning me on before you.”

In half my classes, he would turn and stare from two or three seats in front of me. He’d been a D student, so he sat closer to the teacher, but I had a hard time believing he’d been aching for me. However, I didn’t know much about men.

I swallowed and said, “Shut the fuck up.”

He held his hand up like he was swearing in court. “It’s true. I wanted you.”

I shook my head. “You said I was ugly.”

He spun me to a stop and held my sides. “I was lying to both of us.”

My fingers were close to his chest, and I pressed. He was all muscle. Damn. My skin quivered, and my lips tingled to kiss him as I traced his hard abs. “Well, that’s nice to hear.”

I let out a long breath and curled my fingers around his short dark hair. This might be my only shot, and if I kissed the man I’d loathed and now wanted, he would change me. I’d never been kissed by anyone. I closed my eyes and went to my tiptoes.

It was time. His lips met mine, and it was like I had heavenly melted chocolate in my mouth. The world disappeared around us. My only thought was that he was mine. I never wanted to let go.

As the kiss ended, I blinked and met his gaze. He held me tight, and I knew his pants blocked his ready dick. I was a jumbled mess and scooted away.

For a second, neither of us talked. Then he asked, “Why did you do that?”

We were getting closer to the hotel. Inside my stomach was all butterflies. “I wanted to know if you were worthy of forgiveness.”

He touched my back. “Did I pass?”

Perfect score.I laughed, and my body buzzed. I felt weak near him. As we returned to the fountain, I said, “Yeah, though we both know we’ll never be together.”

He winced like I’d slapped him. Then we stepped into the air-conditioned lobby, and my skin immediately cooled. When the door closed behind us, he said, “Let’s get back inside where you can dance with me.”

We walked together. I was full of confusion, and my head and heart seemed to be out of sync. The music had stopped. I paused outside the door and pointed behind me to a mostly empty room and no bartender. “I think the party’s over and we should turn in.”

His eyebrows bounced. “Is that an invite?”

Right. We weren’t in love or anything. And wanting a kiss was different from wanting to be his entirely, even though I knew that he wanted me too. Making up my mind, I shook my head. “No. I’ll see you tomorrow at the wedding.”

He walked me to the elevator bank but then waited next to me. “Looking forward to a full day with you.”

The doors opened, and he didn’t move. Sex couldn’t happen between us, even though I wanted to rip off his clothes. I waved. “Good night.”

I ran into the elevator, and once the doors closed, I held onto the bannister. I’d never been so tempted in my life, but there was no way I would just forgive and forget his behavior when he was younger. I would be better off if I avoided him and stuck to my original plan.