Machine by Normandie Alleman
8
Dynassy
As Bridger pulledinto my driveway, something dropped out of the bottom of my stomach. I don’t want this night to end.
We’d had such a good time, but I had promised myself that I would not invite him in. If he wanted to come inside, he could be the one to ask. But I had a bad feeling that if he had wanted to be alone with me, he probably would have taken me back to his place instead of just bringing me back to my family home.
Such a gentleman, Bridger came around and opened my door for me then helped me out of the car. As he placed his hand on the small of my back and steered me towards the front door, I crossed my fingers, hoping he would kiss me good night.
When we got there, he took me by the hand and tugged me into an alcove that was not as well lit. The spot under the eaves gave us a little more privacy, and there, he took me into his arms, held me close, and brushed his lips against mine. The kiss was tentative at first, but soon the passionate side of Bridger drowned his politeness and his mouth crushed me, and his tongue invaded my mouth, hungrily searching.
My legs wobbled, and I reached up, wrapping my arms around his neck, not only because I wanted to get my hands into that curly mop of his, but also so he could help steady me in case my knees gave out. The longer our mouths stayed connected, the more our bodies yearned to be touching in every place possible—my legs inched closer, his arms tightened around me.
My hands roamed, as did his. I played with his hair and stroked his back. The smell of him making me wet with desire. He cupped my ass and pressed my pelvis tighter against him. I felt the rise of his erection pulsing against my hip through our clothes. His other hand traveled over the curves of my breast down to my waist, over my hips. I felt my nipples harden, and I was starting to feel there was hope for the rest of the evening after all.
Because I definitely wanted him. Needed him inside me. I wanted to feel the weight of this man on top of me as he plunged into me until we both found our release and collapsed on top of each other.
Then Bridger pulled away, muttering, “I’m sorry, Dynassy.”
“Wait. What’s wrong?” I reached out and clasped his forearm.
“Nothing’s wrong. You’re an incredibly attractive woman. I just, well…I have to go. I’ll call you later.”
And with that, he strode to his car.
I stood there, watching him go, wilting like a morning glory when the sun goes down.
Disappointment washed over me and settled in my veins, and I wished hard that I didn’t like Bridger Thompson so frickin’ much. I wished I could just write him off and never see him again.
But something deep inside knew it wasn’t just sex I needed him for. It was him I needed. The way he made me feel safe and protected. The way he liked me for the girl I was, and not the superstar I was.
Yes, I knew the next time Bridger called, I’d pick up the phone.
And in the meantime, I wouldn’t stop thinking about him.
The next morning, I came down for breakfast to find Ivy toasting some bagels for her and Leo, and my mother making scrambled eggs. It was just like breakfast in any other American household. Except for the rolling cameras. And the lights, and the production crew.
Ah, home sweet home.
“Good morning, honey. I’m making eggs. Want some?” Lucinda asked. We had a chef, but she only worked lunch and dinner unless it was a special occasion.
“I’d love some. What about sausage?”
That made Leo giggle, then Ivy followed suit.
“Sure. I can do that,” Lucinda obliged.
“You guys are so immature,” I said snootily to the twins.
“What?” Lucinda was oblivious.
Leo snickered. “I’m guessing you didn’t get any ‘sausage’ last night.”
Ivy laughed. “Good one.”
“Ugh! You two are so juvenile.”
“What’s wrong?” Lucinda asked as she cracked open an egg and let it fall into the silver mixing bowl.
It took enormous self-control not to whine, “Mommy, they’re picking on me.” Being back under the same roof with my siblings tended to make us regress a decade or more. But instead I responded, “Nothing. Don’t worry about it.”
“But we are worried about it. I got to meet the delicious piece of SEAL meat last night, and he’s hot.” Ivy took the bagels out of the toaster, set them on a plate, and took them back to the table, where she pulled up a chair next to Leo.
“That’s gross,” I chided Ivy.
She shrugged.
“I take it last night didn’t have a happy ending,” Leo said, then he and Ivy burst out laughing again.
“I don’t see why this is funny to you.” I shot daggers at them. Unfortunately, it didn’t faze them.
“What’s so funny?” Lucinda looked up from the eggs and stared at the twins.
“Dynassy has a crush on this dude and he won’t sleep with her,” Leo answered.
“That’s not exactly true,” I stammered.
“Which part’s not true?” Ivy asked, and I wanted to slap her.
“Honey, who is this boy?”
“Boy? Mom, I don’t date boys anymore. I’m almost a quarter of a century old. There are no boys in my life.”
“Except him.” Ivy pointed a thumb at her twin, who elbowed her in the ribs.
“Ouch!” Ivy screeched, and I smiled. She deserved it.
“Okay, whatever this ‘dude’ is, what’s going on? You like him?”
I made a face at the cameras to indicate that I didn’t want to talk about this onscreen, but Lucinda ignored me.
My mother loved living her life in front of the cameras so much that I don’t think she could even understand what it would be like to live off camera. We’d tried to make her see that some things were private, that there were some things kids went through as they grew older that they didn’t want to share with the rest of the world.
She didn’t get it.
Occasionally one of us would boycott the whole thing and refuse to be on “The Barnes Bunch,” but for the most part we gave in and had to accept that this was our life.
“I do. He’s the former SEAL that I met at the event for wounded vets.” I’d be lying if I wasn’t aware as I said this that anything positive I could say on camera regarding vets would help my reputation with our fans. Manipulative? Yes. But what can I say? I learned from the master.
Lucinda’s attention perked up. “Oh, that fellow! Ivy’s right. He is hot. I’ve seen the footage.”
I nodded in agreement. “He is, but he’s not a piece of meat. He’s a great guy. We went shooting yesterday.”
“Shooting?” Lucinda asked.
“Yes, guns. It was all very safe and harmless. Fun actually. But no, he didn’t stay the night.”
“Oh, well that’s refreshing. Perhaps he’s a religious man. You know, we could really use some more religion in this family.”
Ivy and Leo groaned. Our mother had gone on a few kicks in the past where she had us performing rituals from various religions, and none of us were looking forward to another one.
“Mom, you should just go to church more,” Leo said as he slathered cream cheese on his bagel.
“I don’t think that’s it,” I said to Lucinda.
“Maybe he’s a virgin,” Ivy offered.
We all ignored this unlikely possibility.
“I told her he’s just not that into her,” Leo said.
Lucinda shook her head. “That’s not nice, Leo. Why would you say that to your sister?”
“Uh, ’cause it’s the truth. What red-blooded American man doesn’t want to bang Dynassy—besides me and Nick of course? No one. Hell, maybe he’s gay.”
“Shut up. If he was gay, why would he ask me out?”
“I dunno. The dude’s weird. I’m out.” Leo swallowed his last bite, downed a glass of orange juice then waved goodbye. “I’ll be in my room.”
The three of us girls looked at each other and shook our heads.
“Don’t mind him.” Ivy tried to smooth things over for her twin, as usual.
“I think he sounds like a nice guy who is behaving like a gentleman. That’s very refreshing in this day of hook-ups. I don’t know how you kids live like that. Back in my day—”
“No, Mom.” Ivy cut her off. “Just spare us the history lesson.”
Lucinda frowned, then slid the eggs onto a plate and handed them to me. They were brown on the outside, semi-burnt, but I thanked her. Lucinda wasn’t the greatest cook, but I thought it was sweet that she tried. One of the acts in her repertoire that involved nurturing.
“You know, he is a gentleman. He has great manners, and he’s always opening doors for me. He’s very protective, too. Maybe he just has traditional values.”
Lucinda sat down next to me and we started to eat. “I’m sure that’s what it is, honey. You’re gorgeous. He probably wants to let your relationship progress more before you take that step.” She patted my hand, and it did make me feel better.
I took a deep breath and vowed to stop worrying about having sex with Bridger.
I needed to enjoy his company and just let it happen.
Now if only I could do that…
