Brooklyn Monroe Wants It All by Karen Booth

Chapter Sixteen

Monday morning,immediately after Alec finished shooting Good Day USA, it was time to put on a different show. This one was called, “Brooklyn and Alec Are Dating”. Unlike his day job, he had no clue how long the run of this second show would last.

“Hey, Mr. Trakas. Ms. Monroe hasn’t arrived yet,” Maddie noted as Alec came sidling up to the security desk to meet Brooklyn. She leaned in closer to him. “I can’t believe you didn’t tell us you two were an item,” she muttered, punctuating it with a wink.

“Yeah,” Jerome grunted. “That would’ve been good information to have the first time she was on the show.”

“You mean before the betting started?” Alec slid Jerome a look that said he needed to check himself.

Jerome, quick to take a hint but never happy about it, got up from his chair, grumbled, and started off down the hall.

“Just ignore him,” Maddie said. “His wife is three days overdue and he’s super stressed about it.”

Now Alec felt bad. He hadn’t meant to provoke poor Jerome. Also, he couldn’t imagine what it would be like to wait that long for a child to arrive, and then to have to keep waiting. “Will you let me know when they have their baby? I’d like to send them a gift.”

“Sure thing.” Maddie’s eyes lit up. “Ms. Monroe! Good morning.”

Alec whipped around to see Brooklyn, strolling in and looking like a million bucks in a pale pink suit with a fitted jacket, slim trousers, black tank top underneath and black heels. There was a glow in her cheeks, and her hair was shiny and rolling over her shoulders in tempting waves. She’d looked amazing in that cat suit, but she was equally gorgeous in this ensemble. Maybe more so, because he knew that today, they could hold hands. They could kiss. And although it wouldn’t be real, it wouldn’t be entirely fake. There was genuine affection between them. Sometimes, serious heat.

“Morning, Maddie. And there’s my pooky bear.” Brooklyn’s voice sounded like a Disney princess as she took Alec’s hand and pecked him on the cheek, leaving behind a lipstick print he could feel.

“Hello, darling,” he said loudly, then pulled her closer. “Pooky bear?” he muttered under his breath, right into her neck. The temptation to kiss her there was great. Brooklyn had a magnificent neck.

“Sorry. I’m out of practice.” She slid her arm around his waist and rested her head against his shoulder. “How are you, Maddie?”

“I’m great. It’s nice to see you two like this.” Maddie’s sights narrowed on them. “You know, I just realized, Mr. Trakas, that you never brought Ms. Monroe to the studio when you were dating the first time.”

Alec hadn’t thought about it before, but looking back, he realized Maddie was right. “Huh. I guess that’s true. It must have fallen through the cracks.” It had been for the best. He’d been extra miserable at the show then, knee-deep in painful renegotiation of his contract. It hadn’t been that the network was unwilling to bend to his demands. It was more that Alec felt as if a door was closing—another years-long term with Good Day USA, no shot at news, and a girlfriend he adored who had very little time for him.

Brooklyn flattened her hand against his chest. “That’s Alec. Total workaholic. He probably just thought I was going to get in the way.”

“Well, we’re making up for it now.” He spotted the clock on the wall behind the security desk. “We’d better get upstairs for our meeting. We’ll see you later, Maddie.”

“Bye,” she said in response, waving enthusiastically.

Brooklyn and Alec took the elevator up to the executive floor and wound their way back to Georgia Carle’s corner of the network world. Unfortunately, even though they were on time, Georgia was running behind schedule, so they had to wait outside her office.

“Oh, shoot. Alec. I got lipstick on your cheek.” Brooklyn rummaged through her bag, pulling out a small packet. “These are amazing makeup remover wipes.”

“Is it going to make me look weird? I still have on my whole get-up from being on-air.”

Brooklyn twisted her lips, seeming deep in thought. “Hold on. I have an idea.” She took another deep dive into her purse. This time, she emerged with a cosmetic sponge. “I’ll blend it in. And add some extra on the other cheek. Now, sit still.”

Alec wasn’t about to question her methodology as she dabbed at his skin and scrutinized his face, but he did like having her hand on his shoulder, her face so close to his.

“Why do I feel like one of us is applying for a Green Card?” she asked, putting away the sponge and setting aside her purse.

Alec used this excuse to take her hand. “It’ll be fine. We got this.”

She rhythmically rubbed his fingers, making him a bit dizzy. “You’re right. We know how to do this much.” She smiled at him softly, leaving him under her spell. This all felt so natural. So right. And yet all like an illusion. What a cruel twist of fate.

“Ms. Carle will see you now,” her admin said, shaking Alec back to reality.

“Fantastic,” Brooklyn said.

The admin opened Georgia’s office door and waved them inside.

“Alec. Ms. Monroe. Please, come in,” Georgia rounded out from behind her desk, shaking hands with Brooklyn first.

“It’s so nice to see you,” Brooklyn said, sounding pretty convincing.

“Hi, Georgia.” Alec kept his greeting short. He still wasn’t sure what was actually going to happen in this meeting, but there was a chance it would be the beginning of the end of his shot at news.

“Let’s sit over here. Where we can be more comfortable.” Georgia gestured to the generous seating area, which had a long charcoal gray sofa and two side chairs situated near a wall of windows. Behind was an expansive view of the city. “I’m so sorry I was late. I was on the phone with my daughter. Big drama.”

Brooklyn took a seat in the center of the couch and gestured with a sly nod at the cushion next to her. Alec followed her cue and settled in. “I hope everything is okay.” Brooklyn grasped Alec’s hand, seeming perfectly comfortable with it. Was she simply an excellent actress? Or did this feel right to her, too?

“She’s in college at UNC down in North Carolina and stressed about school. Nobody tells you, but parenting a twenty-year-old is just as hard as dealing with a toddler. Maybe more difficult. Because you can’t actually solve their problems. You can only dole out advice. And money, of course. Lots and lots of money.” Georgia laughed, but it sounded truly pitiful. “I guess that’s a few years away for you two, huh?”

Alec swallowed hard. He hadn’t known they were going to get down to the nitty gritty so quickly. Even worse, he didn’t know what to say. “At least.”

“First, you need to get past sleepless nights and potty training, both of which are torture. Then you get to stuff like middle school, which is a complete nightmare. And it only gets more complicated from there,” Georgia said. She made parenthood sound impossible. Then again, his brother Nick had admitted more than once that it was a very tough job—so hard that Alec wasn’t sure he was cut out for it.

“I’m sure you’re a wonderful mother,” Brooklyn said, taking one for the team. There was no way that had been an easy thing to say.

“Where are you two with trying to get pregnant?” Georgia asked, as if that was appropriate conversation in a professional setting.

“Where are we?” Brooklyn countered, but Alec couldn’t help but notice that her voice wobbled.

“Yes. I know you want a baby, and I’m assuming you’re quite serious about each other. Since you were kissing in public. I mean, Alec doesn’t need to be told that everyone and their brother has a camera phone. That was a risky move for a celebrity. Downright reckless.”

Alec silently drew in a deep breath and made a point of sitting a little straighter since he couldn’t ignore the inference that he was an idiot. Still, she wasn’t wrong. He did know better. “You’re right. I guess I was just caught up in the moment. Being around Brooklyn can make it hard to think sometimes.”

Brooklyn slyly elbowed him in the ribs. “We’re not pregnant, if that’s what you’re asking. No little plus sign on the stick for us.”

“But you’re trying.” Georgia sat back in her chair, crossed her legs, and folded her hands in her lap. The skepticism she’d voiced on the phone was now painted all over her face as her eyes shrank to tiny slits and she pursed her lips. This was why she’d called the meeting. She didn’t buy Alec’s excuse. And why should she? It wasn’t really true.

“We’re taking things one step at a time,” he said in an endeavor to be as honest as possible.

Brooklyn pivoted slightly in her seat, looking directly at Alec as if she wanted to make sure they were on the same page. “Alec and I care about each other a lot.”

From where Alec was sitting, it sounded a bit too much like a question. “We do care about each other.” I still love you. The realization could’ve hit him hard, but there was a part of him that had known it all along.

“There are a few things from our past that we need to work through. No relationship is simple,” Brooklyn said, tamping down expectations.

“Don’t I know it. It’s taken my husband and I years and years to figure out how to compromise. Neither of us likes to give up any ground, ever.” Georgia’s expression finally relaxed as she perused Brooklyn and Alec one more time. “Well, this is all good to hear. I normally don’t like to get so personal with employees, especially on-air talent, but the higher-ups are all over me about this. And Jason Adams’ team is not happy. It’s been a difficult few days. I just wanted to make sure that the thing that I was claiming was actually real. Wouldn’t want to end up with egg on my face, so to speak.”

Alec now appreciated that Georgia had stuck her neck out for him. “I appreciate you going to bat for me. And I can reach out to Jason. Make sure there aren’t any hard feelings.”

“That would be helpful. Thank you,” Georgia said. “So I guess we’re full speed ahead with your Barry Millner interview next week.”

“Oh. Fantastic. That’s great news.” Alec felt as though a five-hundred-pound gorilla had just climbed off his shoulders. But he also felt weighed down by something else—every step ahead with his professional aspirations meant less of a chance with Brooklyn.

“I was on the fence about moving forward, but Robin Ortiz is incredibly impressed with you. She says you’re the only man who’s ever walked into her office without an enormous chip on his shoulder.”

Alec wondered if Robin had picked up on his insecurity about starting a new job in his forties, and read that as Alec being humble. Because he did have a chip on his shoulder—he desperately wanted to prove himself. This felt like his final chance. “That’s great to hear. Robin is a rock star. I’m excited to work with her.”

“As long as we stay the course and there are no more problems, I’m optimistic this is going to work out. Thanks for coming in this morning.” Georgia rose from her seat, cuing Alec and Brooklyn to do the same. “I do have one more request. It would be a big help to me if you two could be seen in public. Somewhere where there’s a good chance you might be photographed. I think that would help the brass forget that this happened at all.”

“Uh, sure. We can do that.” Alec eyed Brooklyn, unsure what to suggest. “Any ideas, Brook? We’re both working so much. And our schedules don’t always line up.”

She hesitated, seeming deep in thought. “Umm… I’m supposed to take my nephew Dallas trick-or-treating in Brooklyn Heights. A lot of celebrities live in that neighborhood, so there are usually photographers lurking, trying to catch shots of famous people with their kids.”

“Yes. I love it,” Georgia blurted. “Being with a kid will make it seem even more serious. I’ll get my assistant to tip off a photographer. Just as an insurance policy.” She was in on the fix now, too.

“I’ll need to okay it with my sister,” Brooklyn said. “But it should be fine.”

“That’s that, then. Halloween it is.” Georgia showed them to the door.

Alec and Brooklyn walked away, hand in hand, but he was getting distinctly different vibes from her now than he’d gotten before they’d strolled into Georgia’s office. Once they stepped on board the elevator, Brooklyn let go of his hand.

“Thank you for doing that,” Alec said, desperate to not only express his gratitude, but also find out if she was upset or merely distracted. “Especially since you had to take time out of your workday to do it.”

Brooklyn sucked a deep breath in through her nose, looking up at the numbers as they descended, floor by floor. “No problem.”

The elevator dinged and Alec held the door for Brooklyn, then followed her out into the hall. “Everything okay?”

“Sure.”

First, a two syllable answer. Now, one. This was not a good sign. “I can see it in your face. Something’s wrong. If there’s something you need to say, Brooklyn, please say it.”

She pressed her lips together tightly, which usually meant she was having a hard time keeping words from leaking out of her mouth. “I’m not okay,” she muttered.

“Come on. My dressing room.” They made the quick trip down the corridor. Once inside, he closed the door. “Talk to me.”

Brooklyn tossed her purse onto the couch and started pacing. “Sitting in that room. With that woman,” she sputtered. “It sucked.”

Alec hated himself for putting Brooklyn in that situation. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know she was going to get so personal. And talk about trying to get pregnant. I’m sure that was hard to listen to. And even worse, hard to answer.”

She came to an abrupt halt. “Okay, yeah. That part was not fun. But that’s not what made it hard.”

“Then what?”

She fanned her hand back and forth between them. “Why is it that we can band together to fake a relationship, but we couldn’t make this work for real?”

His chest tightened. The thought had crossed his mind as well. “We talked about the break-up the night we went to dinner. I think I explained myself pretty well.”

“You did. I get it. I don’t like it, but I get it.” She drew in another deep breath as she scanned his face. “But sitting there with you in Georgia’s office, holding your hand, and looking into your eyes, and talking about the future… I got sucked in. It felt real. I started to think about what you said at the premiere. About trying again. And I thought that might be a good idea. That it might work.”

“But that’s good news.”

“And then I remembered that you don’t want a baby. And it all came crashing down around me.”

Their conversations had become like a boomerang—starting in the same place and always ending up exactly where they started. “I never said I was one hundred percent set on not wanting kids. I’m just not sure. They’re not the same thing.”

“Might as well be one hundred. It’s a child, Alec. Either I have a baby or I don’t. There’s no doing this part way.”

“Which is exactly why I’m not sure. I know what’s at stake.”

“How much of this is because of the job in news? Because you would make such an amazing dad.”

“Thank you. That’s sweet. And yes, the job in news is a huge part of it. I can’t be an absentee father. It’s not in my DNA.”

Brooklyn let out a quiet sigh. “I was ready to do this on my own. I’m still ready to do that. So if we could work things out, and you were busy, it wouldn’t be the worst thing in the world. Plus, look at me. I grew up without a dad and I turned out fine.”

It made Alec’s heart swell to know that Brooklyn was trying to make a case for them as a couple. Even when everything right now came with a big old “but”. “And my dad was everything to me. If I became a father, I’d have to be able to give it my all.” There was more to this, and Alec had to express it, even when he hadn’t fully wrapped his own head around it. “That’s the one thing he was holding out hope for. That I would become a dad, just like him. We talked about it. A bunch. And I wanted it, but in my mind, I was so damn sure that there was time. There wasn’t. And I’m still coming to terms with that.”

“You’re only forty-four. There is still time. My doorman just told me the other day that he had his youngest when he was forty.”

“First off, you and your doorman talk way more than is normal.”

“I know. I adore him. I offered him a job. Did I tell you that?”

“A job?”

“Yes. As head of operations. He used to do the same job in the garment district. It’s a big part of my plan to shift gears at Posh Post. Slow things down a bit.”

“I’m glad to hear that.” Although that news came with yet another “but”. She was moving ahead, right now. And he was still chasing his dream. Moving in a different direction. “Fatherhood is more than the number to me. When I said I thought I had time, I meant time to share it with my parents. Now they’re gone.” He heard the wobble in his voice, the pain rising to the surface, and he tried to do what his therapist had told him to do—experience it, acknowledge it, and accept it.

Brooklyn scanned his face, seeming helpless. “I hadn’t even thought about that.”

“I wish I felt as certain as you do about these life choices, but I don’t.” He stuffed his hands into the pockets of his pants as he weighed the pros and cons of what he was about to say. It would be so easy to hold back. Keep it all in. But that might end up being yet another lost opportunity. He was already living with regret. “But it doesn’t mean that I don’t want to try again with you. I do. I still love you, Brooklyn. I tried to tell myself that I didn’t, but I do.”

She swallowed hard, her eyes getting watery. “I tried to tell myself that I didn’t love you, too.”

It felt like his heart was going to explode. “I sense a but…”

“You sense it because it’s there. I love you, but every time we say that, it’s going to hurt a little more. We don’t want the same things right now. And we might never.”

“I understand.” It was one of the hardest things he’d ever had to say.

She wandered over to the couch and collapsed on it. “Let’s face it. You have a whole new level of conflict now. Georgia might be a pain in your ass, but she wants you to have this chance. She’s scrambling to make that happen. And your producer loves you. Georgia said it herself. You have every reason in the world to take this opportunity and run with it as fast as you can. Your dream might actually come true, Alec. That’s incredibly exciting.”

For as long as he’d had this ambition, being on the precipice of actually achieving it didn’t feel the way he’d hoped it would. There was no sense of impending triumph. No finish line to cross. “I’m trying to temper my optimism. I don’t want to get ahead of myself.”

“You’re so much more sensible than me. I’m the queen of getting ahead of myself. I live for it.”

Alec laughed quietly and sat next to her on the couch. She had this pull on him whenever they were close, and right now it was undeniable, but not in a physical way. They were connecting about the things that made it hard for them to connect, and it only made him want her more. How messed up was that? “But that’s one of the things I most admire about you. You aren’t afraid to dream big. This is the one time I’ve done that and it’s terrifying some days.”

She reached for his hand. “Try to enjoy the ride, okay?”

He focused on her left hand, where he’d once hoped to put the ring he’d impulsively purchased, hoping to fix everything that was broken inside him. “I’ll try.”

“No matter what, I can’t be the reason you don’t follow your dream.”

“And I can’t be the reason you don’t follow yours.” He looked into her eyes, and was relieved to feel the spark, even when their conversation had taken such a fatalistic bent. There would always be a connection between them. An invisible tether. His heart would always want her, even if it might never work out.

“I guess we’re finally on the same page.”

“I guess you’re right.” Just not in the way that he’d ever hoped they’d be. They sat in silence as reality settled over them one more time.

“Okay,” she said, breaking the quiet. She grabbed her purse and stood. “I need to get to the office. I’ll see you on Halloween?”

He got up to show her to the door. “Yes. Definitely. I’ll drive. I’ll pick you up.”

He waited for her to make a little red corvette joke. But she didn’t. She walked to the door, each step sure and certain, then turned back to him one more time. “And please wear a costume. Something cool. I want my nephew to have the best Halloween ever.”

No pressure.“I’ll do my best.”