Shadow Oracle by Laura Greenwood

Fourteen

It'seasy to see the difference yesterday's raid has made on the station. There are people everywhere and a lot more noise than normal.

I ignore it all and head over to the reception desk. "Morning, George."

"Hi, Syxe. She's waiting for you in her office."

"Already?"

"I think she wants to get this part over with."

"That bad?"

He chuckles. "I don't think so. There's just a lot to do today and I think everyone's on edge."

"Ah." It does make sense. I've never been part of a major investigation like this, but I imagine it does take up a lot of time.

"Good luck in there," he says, waving me off.

"Thanks."

I make my way over to Fielding's office and slip inside as soon as she calls me in.

"Have a seat."

I do, then wait for her to continue.

"There are some things I can't tell you about the investigation," she says to start. "I know that might be frustrating, but there really isn't anything I can do about it."

"I understand." While I'd prefer to know everything, I've been reasonably sure I don't know everything the entire time. At the end of the day, I'm an eighteen-year-old student, not a trained Supernatural Retrieval Agent, I don't expect to be told everything.

"I don't think you'll be surprised to learn that we made some arrests yesterday. I can't confirm precisely who, but there were some important people in terms of those working out of the Shadow Association headquarters. You gave your statement to my colleague yesterday?"

I nod.

"Good. That, along with the recorded wire, are going to be important when it comes to the trail."

Nerves flutter within me. I'm not sure how I feel about being so pivotal to the case, but it's probably too late to worry about that now.

"We did recover a number of documents along with removing the children. There were twenty-one in total, not all of them were the ones we were expecting to find."

"Twenty-one," I echo. It feels like so many, especially when I never realised that many lived in the building. "Is there a little boy called Mika among the children? He should still be a baby. Mathias and I dealt with his mother's ghost."

"I don't know," she admits. "I've read the reports, but the names started to bleed together. Let me check."

I chew on my bottom lip while she taps on her computer. Her answer won't change anything. But despite the fact Erica has already moved on, I still want to fulfil my promise and find out the truth about what happened to her baby.

"Ah, here we go. Mika, eighteen months old. He's currently been placed with a foster family while the investigation continues. He was the only human among the children, which makes him a good fit. But we're still sorting through all of the paperwork, and don't have the birth certificates of any of the children yet."

"He was taken so his mother would do what the Association wanted. They killed her after they took him."

"Ah, I remember you saying. We have notes in the file about it, though we haven't found any evidence yet. It's a shame she's passed on and we can't ask her for more information."

"But she still wouldn't be able to testify, right?" I ask, wanting to check everything else people have been telling me.

"Yes. And you can't either about ghosts you've talked to. But we can still use the information. But that doesn't matter. It isn't an option."

A knock on her office door pulls our attention away from our conversation. It's a little more laid back than normal. Maybe she's too distracted by the raid they've recently done to think about interviewing me.

"Come in," Fielding calls.

The door opens and a young man not much older than me steps inside. "We found something we thought you'd want to see." He glances at me in what I assume is curiosity. "We've taken copies already."

She nods. "Thanks, Derek." She takes the bundle of papers from him and flicks through them, sorting things into two piles.

He leaves the room, seeming to not have anything else to say on the matter. My curiosity is piqued but I know better than to ask. If it's something she wants me to know, she'll tell me.

"These are photocopies, I'm afraid," she says, surprising me. "We can't give you the real things until the case is complete."

"What real things?" I ask, confusion mounting inside me.

"This is the first time I'm seeing most of this, but it seems the people going through the paperwork have found your birth certificate, among a few other reports, and a sealed letter."

"A letter?"

"I haven't read it yet, but you should realise that other people on the team have. I'm sorry you couldn't be the first person to read it."

"That's fine," I mumble. Maybe it can confirm or deny some of the things the Leader told me.

"They've been testing the paperwork as they go through it, so if anything's been tampered with magically or not, there'll be a note included in the files."

"Are you sure it's okay for me to see these while the investigation is ongoing?" I don't want to put the investigation in jeopardy.

"Yes. Don't share anything sensitive with anyone else, but this has all been approved to share with you."

"Thank you." I stare at the top sheet, but can't make out any of the words. It almost feels like there's too much power in the small bundle of papers and I'm not really sure what to do with it.

Slowly, I flip through the pages. Despite the fact they're photocopies, the words are still crisp and easy to read.

A lump forms in my throat as I take in my birth certificate, something I've never seen before.

"My name really is Syxe," I whisper.

"Was that in doubt?" Fielding looks up from the notes in front of her. She must have decided to do some of her own work while I look through the things they've brought.

I clear my throat. "I guess it's always been something I've wondered."

"Ah." She turns her attention back to her work.

I set my birth certificate to the side. There's plenty for me to look into once I leave, including finally learning my father's name is William Weston. It's something I've never known before and leaves me with a strange mix of emotions.

But I'll research him more later.

A few reports from my time at the Shadow Association barely manage to hold my attention. I'm sure they'll help explain parts of my childhood at some point, but they're nothing compared to the discoveries about where I came from.

The whole world stands still as I turn to the next paper, only to discover the letter Fielding had mentioned. A small note has been added that it was sealed, and hasn't been tampered with, but that's not what holds my attention.

Mum.

The one word is enough to send me into a tailspin of emotions. I've never had anyone to call that and no one has signed a letter to me that way.

Until now.

My gaze dances across the page as I take in the words. I have to read them three times before any of them sink in.

My dearest Syxe,

The day you were born was the greatest day of my life. I was still heartbroken at the loss of your dad, but seeing your face was enough to heal some of the heartache.

If you're reading this, then the worst has happened and I'm no longer with you. I'm sorry that I didn't get to see you grow up and become the amazing young woman I'm sure you'll be. You probably have a lot of questions about my life choices and what that's meant for you. I wish I was there to explain and try to reassure you that I did my best. I hope you can believe me all the same.

I was part of the Reaper Guard assigned to Cambridge when the walls of the City of Blood went up. I'm sure you've heard of it. We should have left when most of the other supernaturals did, but your dad and I wanted to serve the ghosts who were becoming more numerous by the day. We were just friends and guard partners then, but with everything we went through and say, we fell in love. The number of ghosts grew beyond what we could cope with and we were forced to hide that we were reapers just to stay alive.

When we found out I was pregnant with you, we knew we had to leave, but it wasn't easy. It's still so painful to think about that night, and I don't want to include too many details in case this letter falls into the wrong hands. I doubt the people who helped smuggle us out are still alive, but I don't want to risk naming them just in case they are. Your dad died trying to escape. I thought I was going to as well, but I got lucky.

After that, I tried to run home, but my family was gone. I'm still not entirely sure how I ended up in Scarborough, those days are all a blur. But then the Shadow Association found me. I was homeless and heavily pregnant and they offered me a home, shelter, and other children for you to play with when you were old enough. I hope you can forgive me for choosing those things. I had no idea what I was getting into.

If I could turn back to the clock, I'd find another way. I should have turned to the Reaper Guard or someone else, but I wasn't thinking straight.

I want you to know that I love you more than anything, and that everything I did since the moment I learned about you was to provide for you the best I could. I'm sorry if that hasn't turned out the way I wanted it to.

There's more I can't tell you yet, but hopefully, I can in the future.

No matter where I am in life or death, know that I'm thinking about you, that I'm proud of you, and that both your dad and I love you very much.

Love,

Mum

A tear splashes onto the page, making me glad this is a photocopy and not the real thing. I wipe my eyes.

"Do you mind if I take the rest of these home to look at?" I ask Fielding, my voice croaky and full of unspoken emotions. Perhaps I should have thought about this beforehand, but it didn't cross my mind.

But right now, I want to cover myself in a blanket, make a hot drink, and potentially have Mathias by my side so I can talk to someone about it.

"Of course. Let me know if you have any questions. If it's something I can answer, then I will."

"Thanks."

"No, Thank you, Syxe. If you hadn't sent me to talk to Reed, then this would have taken a lot longer." Her genuine smile makes me feel like I'm actually making a difference.

"I'm glad she talked to you." I get to my feet and slip the papers into my bag.

"Me too. I'll see you later."

"You too."

I head towards the door but pause as something else hits me.

"What does it take to join the Agency?" I ask.

Fielding raises an eyebrow and sets down her pen. "Are you considering it as a career?"

I nod. Ever since the career advisor mentioned it, I haven't completely been able to get the suggestion out of my head.

Maybe I can make a difference to a future Syxe the way Fielding has to me.

"You'll need to complete a special training program, then you'll be assigned to a team and have to work your way up to the position you want. It's not easy."

"I don't expect it to be."

"Then you should let me know when you're submitting your application and I'll write you a letter of recommendation."

My surprise must have shown on my face, as she chuckles softly.

"I've seen enough of you to know you'd make a good agent," she assures me. "And that's something I'm happy to put my name behind."

"Thank you."

"You're welcome. But you should take a break now and enjoy yourself. We'll keep agents stationed at the academy, and looking over you and your friends for a while longer, but you should be safe now. The danger has passed."

"That's going to take some getting used to," I admit.

"I'm sure it will. But make the most of it, especially if you want to join the agency. You'll never know what danger lurks around the corners then."

I smile and say my goodbyes, leaving her office. I know it's not going to be the last time I'm here, but something about it still feels like an ending.